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Episode 120: For the Future
* * *
‘Where are you wandering around to the point that you’re not showing your nose?’
It was already the third day.
Deborah was wandering near the residence of the Marquis of Caruso.
Because she had to meet Kalen.
No matter how much he lost his memories of her, could he really not remember a single thing?
Wasn’t he the man who was crying and begging for love as if he would lick the back of her feet?
But that heart—
He forgot all those moments?
Deborah couldn’t accept it.
“I’ve always dreamed of this moment. I’m the happiest man in the world… I will cherish this wedding ring like my life.”
It must have been so, when he received the proposal, he was crying as if he had won the whole world.
Didn’t she propose to him with a sapphire ring that her ex-husband gave her as a birthday present, and he replied that he would safeguard it with his life.
He couldn’t have forgotten her so easily.
‘……Even if he forgot, Kalen has a very fragile heart.’
Wasn’t he a gentle person who sometimes burst into tears and couldn’t even say a word to her?
It seemed like an easy task for Deborah to bake and boil such a person, saying that they were ‘in a relationship in the past.’
It was when Deborah wrapped her shawl tighter in a chilly manner with the intention of meeting and eating Kalen.
How much longer did she wait? Finally, a carriage stopped in front of the mansion, and Kalen got off with a smile on his face.
“My mother will love you too, Lady Marilyn.”
“?”
Deborah couldn’t believe her eyes when she saw the face of the young lady who got off the carriage with Kalen.
‘What is that sweet atmosphere?’
‘……Don’t tell me, he was already seeing someone else? No way, it’s ‘that’ Kalen.’
“I’ve already told my parents that I’m going to marry Lady Marilyn soon.”
“!”
Deborah’s eyes widened as if they were turning over.
‘How crazy.’ Deborah couldn’t stand it any longer, she abandoned her pride, sprinting towards him, calling him.
“Kalen…!”
Kalen slowly looked back at her.
Light blond hair fluttered in the wind, and his innocent blue eyes looked over at Deborah.
Kalen looked like he didn’t recognize her for a moment……
Soon, Marilyn’s small voice made his expression harden.
“Marquis Caruso, that’s Madam Deborah.”
How could the name ‘Deborah’ engrave such an expression on him?
Deborah felt anxious at the sight unfolding before her eyes and the look on his face, but she could not back down.
She walked quickly and spoke to him. Her expression was desperate and sad.
Like a woman filled with love, who came to meet her ex.
“Kalen, let’s talk for a moment.”
“….…”
For the first time, Kalen had an unreadable look on his face. He had been a man who always seemed transparent…
Soon, Kalen spoke kindly to Marilyn.
“Wait a minute.”
Then he quietly took Deborah into the deserted backyard.
‘He’s leading me to the backyard?’
Deborah smirked while following along as it was ridiculous.
He couldn’t bring her inside because of Pamela, but she thought he would say sorry about that or something similar.
Or since she waited in the cold for a long time, she thought he would guide her to another warm place.
She wanted to turn it over right away, but…
Now was not the time to show all of her character.
So she just called him fondly.
“Kalen.”
“…….”
Kalen stopped and just stared at Deborah.
Deborah knew. At times like this, it was effective to shake the heart of this weak, innocent man.
“Have you really forgotten me? …Don’t you really remember who I am?”
Then Kalen opened his mouth.
“Madam Deborah, what was our relationship?”
“We were lovers who swore to marry.”
‘You said you’d put the marquistate into my hands!’
Deborah covered her stinking insides and gently wrapped her hands around his .
“Your mother vehemently opposed us, oh, Kalen.”
“…….”
“But I really loved you.”
Tears welled up in Deborah’s eyes. It was fake tears.
But while crying, she felt an unjust feeling as if she was being deceived by her own acting.
“So I tried to follow you, even abandoning the best family, the Duke of Douglas…”
“….…”
“My Kalen.”
Deborah, like a snake hiding her fangs, buried her head in his arms, pretending to be obedient with her slender body.
Kalen, who had been silently listening to her, asked quietly.
“Did you love me and call me out to the garden every night, me, who was 15 years younger?”
“…What does age have to do with love?”
Deborah desperately made excuses.
“It’s not a sin to love a young man!”
Kalen chewed his words and spit them out in despair.
“Yes, Deborah, I’ve got some weird sexual preferences. I was never satisfied with any woman.”
“!”
“Except for you, I can’t explain how I got into that habit.”
“…That, Kalen, it can be explained.”
“No. I’ve already heard from my mother. It wasn’t even you who exposed our relationship, it was me.”
“….…”
“You were in a hurry to hide me and deny my love.”
“That……!”
Kalen grabbed Deborah’s chin, and raised her head that was tucked in his arms. Her jaw muscles trembled as she chewed on her teeth in anger.
“You played with me, didn’t you?”
Deborah realized in this instance.
Kalen didn’t originally have a fragile nature, he only acted that way towards her because he was in love with her.
“I heard I clung to you like a dog. That’s why you’re trying to marry me, you’re out of options.”
Kalen’s eyes burned bright blue as if he was digging into Deborah’s cold eyes.
“Without my family, I am nothing to you.”
Deborah was stabbed in the head, and she shook it desperately.
“No! That’s not true!”
“Don’t even think about making excuses. You’re such a woman, so as proof…”
Kalen’s eyes lit up with ridicule.
“Just now, rather than saying you abandoned your ‘husband’, you said that you abandoned ‘the Duke of Douglas’ and followed me.”
“….…”
“I’m not the man you love, I must have been nothing more than the ‘Marquis of Caruso’ to you.”
Deborah exclaimed as if exasperated. Her eyes were already engulfed in madness.
“Yes, that’s right!”
“…Is that right?”
When the speculation turned out to be true, Kalen’s eyes shook as if he was hurt.
“Yes! But you loved me anyway. Don’t you remember that?”
“….…”
“You chose me, Kalen!”
Deborah grabbed his collar and shouted desperately. Her eyes narrowed again.
“Now, Pamela erased your memories with the ‘Book of Oblivion’. So, your current feelings are fake!”
“….…”
“It’s really me who you love!”
‘So take me back!’
‘Because now I really have nothing left…’
Kalen stared blankly into the air as if frustrated. Then, he shoved Deborah hard, who was clinging onto him tightly, and she fell onto the floor.
He said, looking down at her with disillusioned eyes.
“My mother was wise.”
“!”
“Don’t come to me again. If you come here again, you will be charged with blasphemy against a high-ranking noble, and you will be beaten.”
Kalen just turned his body away from Deborah. Leaving her hysterically wailing on the cold road.
“……Madam!”
Mary Jane rushed over and supported Deborah.
Deborah grinded her teeth, her whole body shaking.
Really? Was there no way to regain the brilliance she enjoyed as ‘Deborah Douglas’?
…This could not be.
Deborah’s eyes flashed after thinking hard like a lunatic.
‘Yes, my last rope is definitely……!’
“Let’s go right now, to Archduke Marquis!”
* * *
I had been avoiding Rixus the whole time because I’ve been busy with paperwork.
I didn’t have the confidence to see his face right away.
‘At least, I’ll see him after this ‘job’……’
I thought I would be able to see him only then, when I felt a little more comfortable.
If I get Margot’s Pendant and do ‘the job’, my heart wouldn’t be as restless as it was now.
……But now, I wasn’t even sure what kind of expression to make in front of him.
However, messages often came.
〈Will I see my wife at the dinner table?
I won’t bother you at the table.
Of course, it could be a little while.〉
It was a cute note.
If I were a normal newlywed, I would have been happy to see a note like this.
‘I’m sorry, Rixus.’
I had no choice but to say no and imply that I was busy.
I carried out my work by bringing furniture to an empty room rather than in my usual office.
And I hardly ever went into the bedroom. I was afraid he would come find me.
The next day.
〈Is it true that you moved your office? Tell me where it is.〉
Unsurprisingly, a note came saying that he would like to know where my new office is.
The location would have been difficult for him to find because it had been kept secret.
My message was delivered by Maribel, and as soon as it was delivered, Rixus’s reply message went to Maribel.
〈I couldn’t sleep all night.
Now I can’t sleep without you.
My bed is so wide and cold…
I think I’m going to die because I miss your body scent.
Candy, I miss you.〉
The content of the note was a little sad and lovely.
However, the promise to go to him coolly was not fulfilled either.
After three days passed, even the note he sent felt as if he had reached the limit.
〈Are you experimenting with when I’ll go crazy?〉
I sighed and rubbed my forehead.
‘…He’s tortured unintentionally.’
I felt sorry for Rixus and my heart ached.
I put on a simple coat and went out of my newly set up office.
“Queen, where are you going?”
“Don’t follow me. It’s okay.”
The escort and the maid were dismissed; I was thinking of getting some night air by myself.
These days, it was impossible to get help with dressing. I had changed all my outfits to ones that were easy to put on and take off myself. I felt like I could be caught by anyone.
If anyone saw the blue roses on my shoulder, I couldn’t explain what it was.
I had to be very careful. With everyone, including Rixus.
That was the only way to save my life and protect Rixus.
After walking in the chilly wind for a while, I felt much better.
At that time, when I was feeling a little calm…
—As soon as I noticed a dark silhouette, my heart tumbled off the cliff and plunged into the mud.
“!”
Obviously, it was Rixus.
He was looking at me with cool eyes under his black hair.
Badump, badump, badump.
My heart was beating like crazy, and at the same time, swish— I turned and walked quickly.
It was an act I did instinctively.
But I couldn’t even take more than a few steps and was caught by his large, warm hands.
“Ah!”
He nudged me through the bushes in the garden and blocked my way.
Behind me was a tree, and in front of me, was a fiercely angry Rixus.
His eyes were dark and terrifying.
Rixus had me in between his arms like he was trapping me in, and looked at me with red eyes.
His tenacious eyes dug into me as if hunting my heart down.
“I found you before I went crazy.”
“Fortunately.” He added, in a whisper.
Slowly flowing breaths ran gently down my neckline.
Surprised by the sensation, my eyelashes trembled and curled down.
Rixus took a deep breath as if swallowing any bursting emotion, biting his lip tighter than I was doing, then barely uttered.
“I miss you.”