CH 66

“Oh, she’s?”

Yurino-sensei is watching television while eating oranges when I visit the Yurino family.

Subaru falters a little, unable to reply immediately to Yurino-sensei’s question. Then she hits her hand and smiles sweetly, telling a lie as natural as breathing.

“She’s Endou Mako-chan, a student from my grade in Private Atlas Academy. We planned to pass this New Year’s Eve together.”

“Ah, is that so? Nice to meet you for the first time, Endou-san. I’m Subaru’s older brother, Tamaki. Please make yourself at home.”

“I am Endou Mako. I will be intruding upon you into the late hours.”

Endou is my real surname. My real name, is Endou Makoto. The name Sakurai Makoto has stuck so deeply that I feel strange being called Endou Makoto now.

Sure enough, Yurino-sensei couldn’t recognise me. Of course. Even I may not be able to  recognise a close friend who changed genders. Moreover in my case, my stature changed considerably, beyond what an operation can change.

Looking down to hide my puffy eyes, I lower my head politely.

As soon as I arrive at Subaru’s room, the tears I managed to stop, spill again in large drops as though a dam has broken. Maybe I held back crying for too long so the accumulated tears end up overflowing.

“Don’t cry, Mako.”

Subaru hugs my body.

I thought she was rather small when I was a guy, but I’m much smaller than Subaru now that I’m female.

I bury my face in Subaru’s inviting, corpulent chest. It’s D cup. 65d.

“Subaru, why do you think we were brought to this world?”

No matter how I think about it, I think it’s harassment from god-sama. It could be god-sama hating on me. Or it could be god-sama’s game to cause mischief, it didn’t matter who it was. Whichever it is, a god-sama from somewhere is ridiculing my state of affairs. Definitely.

“About that. I wonder if it was Mitsuki-chan who summoned Mako. I just realised not long ago though.”

“Eh, … Mitsuki did?”

“Yes. It was written.”

Mitsuki summoned me?

From that Mitsuki’s state, it’s hard to think she can do such a thing. In the first place, Mitsuki hasn’t even clearly realised that I’m not her older brother. For that soft and fluffy Mitsuki to summon me from the real world to the otome game world, such a ridiculous thing is impossible.

“What do you mean it was written?”

Subaru brings out the Hearthrob Love Revolution software from her closet.

Opening the package with Mitsuki smiling in the center lined by capturable characters, she takes out the instruction manual. Flipping the pages, she reaches the summary page. Subaru points to those few lines so I stretch my body and read them.

When a normal 17 year-old girl estranged from love transferred to Izumino Gakuen, her and their love revolution began. She has to further her romance with one male as much as possible in a year, while raising Studies・Sports・Charm・Arts・Housework specs. It becomes possible to capture the characters as you raise certain specs. However, if you have the hidden character, Mitsuki’s older brother, make an appearance, you can capture a character even with lacking specs, and can receive a confession from the character before March 31.

Furthermore, the only one who can summon the older brother, Sakurai Makoto, in Hearthrob Love Revolution is his twin younger sister, Sakurai Mitsuki alone.

“Why didn’t you tell me about this earlier!! Wait… don’t tell me the punchline is that you remade this instruction manual?”[1]

“Of course not. I won’t go to such lengths to do something so troublesome. I was looking at the LoveRevo software when you went to meet Soutarou, and it changed to this. So, I thought it’s unbelievable but. If we trust this as it is, it means Mitsuki had summoned you here, Mako.”

If we trust this entirely, it means Mitsuki summoned me here.

However, Mitsuki doesn’t know that I’m actually female or that I came from another world. It’s hard to think that she pretended while knowing all that. If so, Mitsuki summoned me as her older brother unknowingly. But why was it me? Because I’m a friend of Subaru, the creator? If so, for choosing someone for the older brother role, everything from my gender to my personality was too perfunctory.

For the time being, I shall acknowledge that Mitsuki summoned me. No matter how it’s disputed here, I won’t know the true reason I came here.

However, in that case, I no longer have a use now that Mitsuki tied the knot with Yasuchika, meaning I can be returned to the real world. The business is done so I should have no choice but to return.

“It’s just a hypothesis. I don’t like forcing a reason on a matter that has none, but it feels kind of unpleasant if there isn’t one. Isn’t it better than there having been no reason?”

“The reason is viable for the time being. Moreover, I like Mitsuki a lot, so I don’t mind being summoned for the sake of her romance.”

Summoned for the sake of Mitsuki’s romance, forced to carry out the role of her older brother, and told to return after the matter is done. It’s unreasonable, but I wonder why I don’t mind when it’s for the cute Mitsuki’s sake? Perhaps the instincts as Mitsuki’s older brother was already planted in me.

“However, Subaru, Mitsuki’s love is already fulfilled so it’s about time we return but why was it half-settled like this? Returning the gender but not letting us return… This kind of half-dead status is the most painful.”

This state of being afraid, wondering when we’ll be returned to the real world is painful.

Tired of crying, I fall prostrate on the table with exhaustion.

“This is also a eighth-grader syndrome-like opinion but… Perhaps the power that removes foreign bodies that entered otome game world, is competing with Mitsuki-chan’s power of not wanting to lose her onii-chan?”

“Wow…”

Half-convinced and half-repulsed by the doujinshi-like reason Subaru announced, I reply.

If I’m to believe Subaru’s words as they are, although I was brought to the otome game world by Mitsuki’s unconscious power for the sake of her romance, I’m made to return to the real world by the power that removes foreign bodies. However, Mitsuki’s feelings of not wanting to lose me makes me remain here… I’m left in this incomprehensible state, is that what it means?

Of course I can’t deny it[2] was really forced, but I see the coherence.

“If that’s the reason, Mitsuki has to give up on me for me to return to the real world. The opposite if I don’t want to return.”

“I suppose so. However, this is like an armchair theory, I don’t know if things will go that well.”

“Yes… But we can rest more easily than when we knew nothing of the reason.”

Who summoned me to this world, and why was I summoned. Even if it was a made-up reason, having an answer to my question is much more comforting than not knowing anything.

“So what do you want to do, Mako? Return?”

“… What about you?”

“I don’t want to return yet. I have something to do and want to stay here a bit longer for.”

I grow anxious at the unexpected and clear reply of Subaru’s.

“What is it want to do?”

“Eh～, doujin activities and such?”

Subaru’s reply was wholly cheerful, but being her long time friend, I can at once tell that it wasn’t her true feelings. In the first place, doujin activities can be done in the real world too.

Subaru probably wants to support my romance. I can’t honestly admit I want to stay here, so she’s trying to give me a push on the back.

“Me too… I want to stay here a bit longer. Just a bit longer.”

I’m aware I’m saying things convenient for myself.

My family in the real world and Soutarou in the otome game world, I’m leaving it up in the air, unable to choose one. It’s too convenient to gain happiness by obtaining both.

It’s because I understand all that, that I know I’m being selfish. Even then, I want to live the sweet life here a bit.

“You don’t have to make excuses, Mako. A human won’t be punished for experiencing a dream for a mere year or two in their long life. In that time, you just have to find a method to use the power Mitsuki-chan called you here with, to come and go as you please, right?”

“Is that okay? It’s like I’m giving up on making a choice.”

“Isn’t choosing both also a choice? If you return now, you won’t be able to find a way to use Mitsuki-chan’s power. I think staying here is correct regardless of your choice.”

I understand Subaru’s words, and agree with them. Staying here is correct to find the power to travel between the real and otome game worlds.

However, I’m muddled. The something that I’d yet to sort remains in my heart, and it’s too painful to live here while carrying that feeling.

Without a word, Subaru silently waits for my answer.

At that moment, pinpon, my smartphone notifies me of Soutarou’s message. Startled, I open the app. Soutarou sent a single “Are you okay?! Don’t tell me you met with an accident?”, words worrying about me. Soutarou, you could be more angry at me,  for deserting you without a word.

Looking at Subaru’s face, she’s smiling bitterly. As the creator, Subaru probably understands Soutarou more than me. Even the words he’ll send to me, who deserted him.

I reply with trembling fingers. “Are you, still waiting?” A Read was immediately attached to it, with a  “Of course” reply.

It’s almost an hour since then, y’know? Is he an idiot! He really is an idiot!

What will he do if I return to reality like this? Will he continue to wait? Will he continue to wait for my return…?

“Soutarou says he’s waiting for me…”

“Why not go meet him? You’re living in the same world.”

“But the current me is female, you know… Not Sakurai Makoto, but Endou Makoto… Even I won’t be able to tell.”

Even if he sees the current me, Soutarou definitely can’t tell that I’m Sakurai Makoto.

There are vestiges but the facial appearance and structure are different and the height has a difference of more than 20 centimeter. Even the atmosphere differs, and the voice and personality can’t be said to be the same. Most importantly, the gender is different. Even I won’t be able to recognise myself.

Although I enumerate excuses one by one, in the end Soutarou not being able to recognise me is the most painful.

“Soutarou will continue to wait if you don’t go. He’ll continue to wait, under the cold night sky. I don’t know if Soutarou will be able to recognise the current Mako. But I know this. Soutarou will continue waiting for Mako till the end.”

How can I leave him be when she says such a thing with a serious face?

I stand up slowly.

I’ll happily throw Soutarou away if he can’t recognise me. With thoughts that put up a brave front, I proceed to make a final bet.

[1] The last part was different from the original summary, which appeared in chapter 11.

[2] The hypothesis.