Chapter 35: The Sacrifice to the Imperial Family

It was a short time, but I was speechless—people keep changing. The autumn sky, which used to be sunny, is now pouring rain one after another. It wasn’t an interesting topic, so I turned my head straight away.

“Mr. Berkne. Do you know why Azmaria wants to be the Duchess?”

“Unless you don’t hear it directly from the Young lady, it will all be speculation.”

Berkne’s expression slightly changes similarly to Richton. If Richton had a cold face with my skin trembling all the time, Berkne was closer to a face that makes it impossible to guess what he was thinking. For example right now, is he pretending not to know, or is he simply not interested? If the opponent was Berkne, both were plausible.

“Prince Wilhillm is scary.”

“It’s a statement that is difficult to agree with. Miss Azmaria Will and Prince Wilhillm were like real siblings.”

Ever since I started dreaming, I’ve been curious about it.

“She secretly told me that she hated to be Prince Wilhilm’s dog.”

Is the existence of the isolated castle, as Azmaría said, a completely hidden truth under the water? Berkne’s face was visibly hardened. It was a rare sight, so I pretended not to know.

“Is she afraid of dogs? She wouldn’t have come to Ingord just for that reason.”

“…Did Miss Will say that directly?”

No way.

“Do you know what it means?”

“It’s a disgrace maintained by imperial power. I didn’t expect Miss Will to know.”

It’s a secret, but he really knows everything about dogs and whatnot. No, since Berkne is from Imperial City, is he not included in the dogs? However, Azmaria said that only a few high-ranking nobles knew about it. This was suggesting that Berkne’s power was somewhat influential even in the highly Imperial City.

“Yes, you’d better get to know each other little by little. There are two castles deep in Imperial City Fortress. Hill Castle and Yale Castle. The existence of these two castles is top secret even in the imperial family, and only a few nobles know.”

Hill Castle. Richton’s desperate voice, soaked in rain, crossed my mind.

‘I don’t have a room. We’re going to Hill Castle.’

It was certain. The name of the cage where I was imprisoned in my dream was Hill Castle. I naturally turned my head towards Keane. Contrary to expectations, his countenance was much worse than that of Berkne. He was staring at the floor without a word, with eyes that had fallen into the shadows. Does he know? Why? One reason for being a close confidant to Richton?

“The Ingords and the Karolds each offer a child as a sign of loyalty to the Imperial family.”

Ingord and Karold. There was no other way to think. It was referring to Richton Ingord and Agrane Karold whom I possessed.

“I don’t understand. How can sacrificing a child be an act of loyalty?”

“Because they are not ordinary children.”

For a moment, my mind went blank as if I had been hit in the back of the head with a blunt weapon. Richton’s madness was said to be the price of power. What if that power also exists in me?

“Those children are raised in the Imperial palace—when the time comes, they will be disposed of. Miss Will doesn’t seem to have accepted the other side of the Emperor.”

I couldn’t answer. ‘That’s amazing.’ or ‘The Imperial family had such a dirty side.’, I couldn’t get words out of my mouth at all. I was scared and afraid. It was madness that made even that great Richton into a murderer who could not control his reason. So what about Agrane’s madness? When and in what form? Or does she already have it? Am I the only one who doesn’t know?

“It’s not a story that anyone can easily accept. The fact that the descendants of the venerable families that prospered the Empire have been the dogs of the Imperial family from generation to generation.”

No, all of this is conjecture. There’s no guarantee I’ll have the same madness as Richton. But didn’t the book say that Karold’s last hundred years were a time of madness for generations to come? It took a long time for them to regain their mental stability. Self-gratification played a big role in the thought that nothing would change if I thought about madness right now.

A short conversation was heard. After a while, the surroundings became quiet again. The sound of rain outside and the sound of sparks from the fireplace were all we could hear. Keane disappeared, and Berkne silently looked at the oil painting on the wall. It was as if the kettle was waiting for the water to boil. Through the window, I saw a black silhouette on horseback approaching the mansion. The owner of that silhouette could be identified without checking his face.

“Did he go hunting in this weather?”

Berkne answered while looking at the painting without turning his body once.

“Because he likes the rain.”

Now it was a sentence that made me nod my head. Right, Richton loves the rain.

“A little, to the point of being morbid.”

There was no disagreement about this impression too.

***

As the day was overcast, the sun also set quickly. When this rain stops, the winter will begin. After serving Azmaria’s dinner, I sat quietly in the parlour and looked up at the ceiling. When I wake up after falling asleep like this, will Richton sit next to me like yesterday? I haven’t seen him all day. The only time I saw him was out of the window before dinner. When the vacation is over and I will enter the annex, it will be more difficult to meet him. If Azmaria becomes Duchess and enters the main building, it might get a little better.

‘…What’s going to get better?’

Am I really going crazy? Otherwise, I can’t have such crazy thoughts. It felt like my chest was tight. I left the parlour and walked as the bridge led me.

Shwaa

I unfolded the umbrella and went outside, crossing the fence Keane was leaning on and crossed the bridge over the brook. A forest as black as a Raven’s hair appeared in front of me.

‘Walk for three days past the swamp and there will be Giorta’s Meadow. Beyond that, the Count Giorta’s estate is there.’

Can I run away now? The surroundings were quiet. Neither the wandering wolf nor Richton with his gun could be seen. The worries were brief. I threw myself into the raven haired forest. I moved slowly as if I was on a walk, and then ran like crazy. Dirt and grass splattered on the skirt.

“Huh, huh…”

There was only a faint light that could help me in distinguishing the sight in front of me right now. Maybe. By now, I wondered if he might be sitting in the parlour. I laughed out loud. At the same time, my reasons returned.

“I, here…”

What nonsense am I doing?

It feels like my body’s warmth is rapidly dropping. I wondered if it would feel like this to be buried under the ground while alive. I followed the way back to Ingord. It was fortunate that the road was well trimmed. I almost died in the forest because I was out of my mind for a while. I think I ran out of breath, and not long after, I saw the Ingord mansion. A dirt road that feels like a small river due to the rain.

“You are late.”

On the road, with the mansion shrouded in darkness, Richton stood.

“Go back.”

A gentle force grabbed my arm. I stood next to him with my whole body loosened up. The umbrella slid out of my grasp and flew behind, but Richton didn’t care. He wrapped his arms around my half-wet shoulders and went down the mountain.

“How did you know?”

It was me who asked the question, but it was obvious that I did not hear the answer. I’d say it’s because he is always watching. Now, those words come to me with some sincerity.

“You don’t think I’ll run away?”

Richton waited for me here. As if he knew I was coming back.

“You, why?”

I got angry at the voice which didn’t sound serious at all. This situation, when I was alone and anxious, suddenly felt so terrifying. I pushed him, and cried out as if vomiting blood.

“Why? Because I found my lost memories. The memory that made you hate me!”

It was half lie and half truth. I was recovering Agrane’s memories, but I had no idea how he came to hate Agraine. Now I can no longer stand being blind. I had to figure out why Richton couldn’t let Agrane go. Only then will I be able to let go of this disgusting feeling without any regrets.

“Wrong.”

Even in the falling rain, only his voice was very clear.

“That too is very clearly wrong. You’d better roll your head a little more to fool me. If you had found your memories, you wouldn’t have been able to leave me even more.”

Richton pulled my shoulders again. But I didn’t move and just looked up at him. Richton didn’t force me. He tilted his umbrella so that my body was completely hidden from the sky, and my damp shoulders leaned towards him.

“You have changed. Where did the maid of Triviache, who was arguing in front of me go?”

“I’m not changing, I’m going back. To the Agrane of the old days that the master desires.”

“You still don’t want to be called by that name?”

“Who would be happy to be called by a name that is not mine?”

“You really think it’s not yours?”

“Nothing here is mine.”

Raising both hands, I showed Richton empty hands with nothing.

“It’s just a few pennies from my salary and the name Susan, which the master gave me.”

“It’s not bad either.”

Narrowing distance. Richton grabbed my wet hand and pulled it down.

“No, that might be better.”

In the darkness of the forest his eyes fell upon me.

“But it’s not like that, Agrane.”

A slight warmth was transmitted from the foreheads that touched me. I stopped breathing. Wet blue-grey eyes on a misty lake shore. Those eyes cried out to me. Swallow yourself.

“I came here only to see you. I can’t see you at ease alone in this endless, terrible hell. Who am I now?”

A hot breath landed on my lips. It ended there. He looked like he would eat me at any moment, but he didn’t end up kissing me. It seemed as if time had stopped like this. Closing his eyes long and opening them, Richton stretched his back.

“…damn it.”

And as if nothing had happened, he wrapped his arms around my shoulders and continued walking along the dirt road. Why? I didn’t hate Richton like that. Also, this was clear proof that I was gradually becoming Agrane. As if I had swallowed her body, the memories and emotions of Agrane returning were taking away my mind one by one. At the end of this road I will eventually be defeated by Agraine.

“Don’t forget, Agrane.”

…Yes. It wouldn’t hurt to accept everything if necessary.

“The only way you can run away from me is to win the bet.”

Perhaps Agrane is the last resort to get me out of this place.