It's hot. So hot that it feels like my skin is burning. Standing in front of it, my whole body is drenched in sweat. I wipe the sweat with a towel and scoop up the ashes with a shovel. Sweat droplets from my forehead fall onto my face. My vision keeps blurring. The shovel keeps slipping because of the sweat on my palms.
While I was firmly gripping the shovel and scooping up the ashes, someone called out to me.
"Hey, maid."
"..."
"Hey. Hey."
When I didn’t respond, he tapped my shoulder with his fingertips. I pretended to be annoyed and ignored him. Then, he seemed to get upset and leaned in closer.
"Hey! Are you listening to me?"
If I didn’t acknowledge him, he would keep bothering me, so I sighed and stood up. I plunged the shovel deep into the pile of ashes and stood there with a slanted posture. The man shivered and hunched his shoulders when I faced him directly. I looked at him indifferently and opened my mouth.
"Why."
"Did, did you talk to her?"
"About what."
"Did you ask her what she thinks of me? I asked you last time, remember!"
Ah, that. I recalled the persistent requests he had been making since last time. I dug my finger into my ear and sighed.
"Yeah. She doesn’t like you."
"Why, why?"
The man looked shocked and made a pained expression. Of course, it’s obvious. I shrugged and picked up the shovel again. Then, he grabbed my arm and demanded to know why she didn’t like him.
"Because you’re poor."
"What?"
"She doesn’t like you because you’re poor. She loves gold coins. Can you fill her arms with gold coins?"
"Of course I can!"
"Stop talking nonsense and give up. I’m saying this for your own good."
Just by looking at me working here, it’s clear that even silver coins would be a stretch. My daily wage barely covers a single meal. Besides, you can’t handle her personality.
I shook off his hand and resumed scooping up the ashes. The man stood there, frozen in shock. Is it really that shocking? No, she didn’t even give you a second glance, and you fell for her and deluded yourself.
But it’s not my problem. I was focused on scooping up the ashes when the man suddenly pointed at me.
"Don’t lie to me!"
"I’m not lying."
"You are lying! You’re trying to drive a wedge between us!"
"Are you crazy?"
The heat must have finally driven him mad. Who’s doing what? I snorted as if I had just heard the funniest thing in the world. But the man was confident.
"You, you, you like me!"
"Are you out of your mind? I’m already struggling enough without you adding to it, so just go away."
"You like me! That’s why you’re acting this way!"
"Want to get hit with the shovel?"
I plunged the shovel back into the pile of ashes and glared at him. My sweat-soaked hair was sticking to my face. Sensing my threatening demeanor, the man shivered again but didn’t back down.
"Do you think I would like someone like you? A maid like you has no right to look. Hey, you’re overstepping your bounds. You’re a hundred times less pretty and a hundred times less lovable than her. I like her, and no one else. Got it?"
"I don’t know about that, but there’s one thing I’m sure of."
I listened to his nonsense calmly, then picked up the shovel with both hands again. I shook it to remove the ashes and looked at him.
"You’re going to get hit by this."
"What?"
"Come here, you bastard!"
There’s no reason to back down if he’s going to throw a fit. I swung the shovel at him as he started throwing things around in shock.
"How can you eat that! How can you eat that!"
"..."
There he goes again. I sighed. I bent down to pick up the fallen bread and dusted it off.
"Are you sighing now?"
"Because you’re throwing a tantrum like a child."
"Child? You’re saying my behavior is like a child’s?"
"Exactly."
"Hey!"
"Why."
I met his fierce gaze calmly. After all, the one who’s really upset is him. I had no intention of buying new food, and I didn’t have the money to do so. In this situation, I was grateful to have this hard, tasteless bread to eat.
"If you don’t want to eat it, don’t. I’ll eat it."
"..."
"If you hate it so much, go earn your own food."
The fewer people eating, the better. I put the bread back on the table and took off my hat. I untied the scarf covering my head and looked at my face in the cracked mirror. My already dark skin was even darker with the ash. It wouldn’t come off easily even with the scarf.
Suddenly, something flew from behind and hit the wall. It was the bread I had just put back on the table. Then, another object flew and hit the wall, breaking. It was a dish I had salvaged last time.
I stared blankly as objects kept flying and hitting the wall and the back of my head. Ah! I even let out a scream. Alicia was throwing everything she could get her hands on.
I knew that reacting would only make things more annoying, so I didn’t even glance at her. I kept looking at my face in the mirror, but then my hair was suddenly yanked back. In the mirror, I saw Alicia, her eyes filled with venom, pulling and shaking my hair. I was so taken aback that I couldn’t even scream.
"You wicked woman!"
"Let go."
"Do you think I will? You’re treating me like a dog. Just wait! I’ll seduce a noble and change my fate. When that happens, I won’t even care about someone like you!"
"Do what you want. Let go of my hair."
"Never!"
"Is that so?"
I immediately lunged at Alicia. I grabbed a fistful of her fine hair and pulled. Alicia let out a sharp scream, but I ignored it. It hurt as if my scalp was being torn, but I inflicted the same pain on her.
"Ah! Let go! Let go!"
"You let go first!"
"Let go! I can’t let go!"
We struggled, each grabbing the other’s hair, until Alicia finally let go. Seeing her fall to the floor, I stepped back.
Both of us had disheveled hair. My hand was full of Alicia’s long hair, like a clump of fur. Alicia glanced at it and clutched her own hair.
"Sniff, my hair!"
I threw the hair in my hand to the floor. I watched it fall and then smoothed my own hair. My tangled hair got caught in my fingers.
Then, my fingertips touched something hanging precariously on one side. It was a dirty, ash-covered hair tie that had lost its original color.
Ah, I sighed and quickly shook off the ash. The embroidered flower pattern at the end caught my eye. I stared at it blankly until Alicia’s scream brought me back to reality.
"What are you going to do about my hair!"
"What are you going to do about mine?"
"Is my hair the same as yours? How much effort did I put into it!"
"Now you won’t be able to put in that effort, so cut it. Sell it at the market."
"Bad girl! This is all your fault! It’s all because of you! How can you be so shameless? You’re a curse!"
"Like father, like daughter, I suppose."
A child born to a devil wouldn’t be normal. I shrugged, and Alicia suddenly burst into tears. She cried bitterly, tears and snot streaming down her face.
"Ugh— I don’t need any of this! I should have died instead!"
"I hope you have a good outcome, even now."
Her sharp gaze pierced me. I pretended not to notice and looked at the mirror. I was about to wipe off the ash again but threw the scarf away. I was tired and my temper was flaring. Behind me, Alicia sobbed bitterly. Seeing her cry like that, I realized she still had the strength to live.
But I didn’t want to hear her cries anymore. I scratched my head and turned around, and Alicia glared at me as if she had been waiting for it.
"Just wait! I’ll seduce a noble or even a royal and elevate my status! Sniff, I’ll throw away this miserable life and leave! When that happens, it won’t matter how much you try to impress me!"
"You must be mistaken."
I scanned the room. A dilapidated, old house with cracks everywhere. When it rains, water leaks through the roof. When it snows, I have to clear the snow from the roof to prevent it from collapsing. In winter, it feels like I’ll freeze to death, and in summer, it feels like I’ll die from the heat. Even a slight breeze makes the whole house shake.
But even in this house, I can breathe and live another day. It’s the only place that protects me from death.
"The life of a noble isn’t always beautiful. Sometimes it’s worse than you can imagine, like hell. You’ll come to think that living in this dilapidated, old, and poor house is happier."
"What? How do you know that?"
"Because I know."
I scanned the room again and then fixed my gaze on Alicia. She frowned. Her face asked, "What are you talking about?" I just shrugged.
* * *
I came across their news one day when I picked up a newspaper lying on the street. The large photo and the text below it marked the end of their story.
[Earl James Christopher Arrested on Suspicion of Murder]
Only then did I realize that I was just a fleeting character in their story.
That day, I hid in a village for a while with Ethan’s help. The village was quite large, with many residents, and they didn’t pay much attention to outsiders. Perhaps this was also his intention. Thanks to that, I could hide there without much difficulty.
The pouch Isabella gave me before we parted contained gold coins. I managed to cover my living expenses for a while with them, but I lost everything to a pickpocket after a few days. Even the belongings I had were taken by beggars, leaving me with nothing but my body.
I became a penniless wanderer, living on the streets, and my life gradually approached death. I remember feeling bitter about how my life had never been smooth.
Then, I suddenly thought of my father and my third brother in Filton.