ăWhere was that delicious cake store Asakura-san mentioned the other day?ă
I call out to Maika, who is sitting next to me as I put away my pen case.
ăDo you want to go there and buy cake?ă
ăYeah.ă
The teacher is no longer in the lecture hall. I have already attended all the lectures I need to attend today, so all Maika and I have to do now is to go home. But I canât seem to go home early. Today is the day when Sendai-san comes home late from her part-time job.
I wish the student, who she said is a student preparing for an entrance examination, would pass the high school without any problems, and that her tutoring job would disappear as soon as possible.
ăDid something good happen?ă
Maika says in a bouncy voice.
ăNothing happened, but I wanted to eat something sweet.ă
ăSomething sweet, huh.ă
The lecture hall should be noisy now that the teacher is gone, but Maikaâs voice echoes in my ears.
She thanked Sendai-san for buying her a lipstick.
Thatâs part of what I meant, but Iâm also craving something sweet myself. What I said to Maika was true and not a lie, so I should just be me as usual. I know, but my back tingles.
ăCan I go with you? I want to eat cake too, and I remember where it is, so Iâll show you. Oh, and while weâre at it, Iâd like to stop by the bookstore.ă
Maikaâs cheerful voice replies,ăOkay,ăand we both leave the lecture room. While complaining about the impending exam, we head for our first destination, a bookstore.
ăCold! What is this wind?ă
Within five minutes of leaving the college, Maika complains about the headwind and shoves her hands into her coat pockets. Then, seeing me with my scarf and gloves, reducing the area of skin exposed to the cold wind to the bare minimum, she murmured,ăMaybe I should buy a scarf.ă
ăItâs warm.ă
I hold tightly to the scarf that I told Maika I bought for myself. I canât let go of the scarf, which protects me from the freezing wind in the morning and the strong wind in the evening.
ăYeah. Itâs like youâre perfectly protected from the cold. Oh, I canât wait for spring break. Itâs cold outside, and I just want to stay at home.ă
ăMaika, youâre not going home for spring break, are you?ă
ăYeah. Iâm over there. You want to go play?ă
ăYou just said you wanted to hang out at your home.ă
ăItâs one thing to go out and have fun, itâs another to stay home. Letâs invite Sendai-san and go somewhere.ă
The voices coming from next to me have added names that shouldnât be mixed in, and itâs hard to sayăthatâs niceăhonestly. But I couldnât sayănoăso I saidăyesăas if it was nothing.
ăCome to think of it, didnât you go to the zoo with Sendai-san?ă
Where will the three of us go on spring break?
I tell the truth, thankful that the conversation didnât turn in that direction.
ăWe went to see the shoebill.ă
ăAh, itâs so cute. I want to go see it too.ă
ăLetâs go together next time.ă
ăThatâs nice.ă
Maika lightly utters theăthatâs niceăI couldnât say earlier.
Sendai-san makes my mouth heavy.
But that weight is different from when I was in high school. Back then, the five thousand yen between us was the weight. I never told anyone what happened after school. Those rules weighed on me and I didnât talk about anything that involved her.
Now that I am a college student, there is no such rule anymore.
Maika also knows that Sendai-san and I live together.
If I wanted to say something, I could say anything. And yet there are many things I cannot say. I donât even want to say it. I would like to keep Sendai-san a secret and keep it to myself.
I know I am not a very good person.
ăMaika. What would you like to see when we go to the zoo?ă
I make a cheerful voice to blow away the Sendai-san in my head.
ăEh, I wonder? The shoebill and then maybe a tiger or a lion?ă
ăTigers and lions seem so ordinary.ă
ăTheyâre the best standard, you know?ă
ăWhatâs your favorite animal then?ă
ăHmmm, I guess itâd be squirrel. I used to have one.ă
After a little hesitation, Maika gives an unquestionable answer to my question.
Sheâs not like Sendai-san.
She has a proper favorite animal, and she can answer that. And itâs nothing special. Itâs something that anyone can answer, not just Maika, and should not be difficult. Anyone can answer what they like.
The strange thing isââ
I tug at the end of my scarf. I move my legs to a stop, pushing Sendai-san back into the corner, who has returned to my head without asking.
We go into a bookstore and Maika buys two manga. I also buy a manga and a novel, and we go to buy a cake.
ăAsakura-san said this must be the place.ă
Maika says in front of the store, which is more convincingly described as selling jewelry than selling cakes, and goes inside. I followed her, but if I had come alone, I would have turned around and left. If the exterior and interior are too stylish, I hesitate to go inside.
I was glad Maika was there and looked at the showcase lined with jewel-like cakes.
ăThey all look so good, I canât decide.ă
I hear Maikaâs bouncy voice.
The cakes all look delicious, and it is hard to decide what to buy, but I have decided to buy two rare cheese cakes.
ăWhat do you want to buy, Shiori?ă
ăCheesecaââ oh yeah, Maika. What kind of cake do you think people who seem to like cheesecake might not like?ă
ăWhatâs with that complicated setup? Canât it be a cake that someone who seems to like cheesecake would like?ă
ăStill, that would be fine, butâŠă
I donât want to harass Sendai-san.
I want her to have a delicious cake anyway, so I know that I should buy her a rare cheese cake, which she must like, even if I donât know if itâs the best or not.
However, I also foolishly think that if I put something she doesnât like in front of her, who keeps dodging and wonât tell me the truth, she might tell me what she really likes.
ăInstead of playing the association game, why donât you ask the person itself what cake it wants to eat? Itâs faster to ask about cakes they like than to avoid cakes they doesnât like.ă
ăThe person itself?ă
ăSendai-san⊠is it her, or not?ă
ăâŠYes.ă
That is true, but there is no point in asking her.
Sendai-san says she likes everything. When I asked her if she preferred rare or baked cheesecake, she said she liked both. She wouldnât tell me the truth.
ăIâll order rare cheesecake and shortcake.ă
I save myself the futile act of asking the person in question and decide which cake to buy and take home.
ăWell, I think Iâll have the fruit tart and lemon pie.ă
Two for Maika.
I have four.
We bought the cakes and left the overly fashionable store. I leave Maika and head for home, even though Sendai-san hasnât come home yet.
After a bumpy ride on the train and a walk down the street where Sendai-sanâs favorite Mike-chan haunts, I arrive at the empty house. I put the cakes in the fridge, finished my meal briefly, and was in my room compiling my report when I heard a thump, a knock at the door.
ăYou can open it.ă
As soon as I said it a little louder, the door opens and Sendai-san enters the room.
ăIâm back.ă
ăWelcome back. Thereâs cake in the fridge. You can have some.ă
ăItâs so rare for you to buy a cake, Miyagi? Is something wrong?ă
ăNothingâs wrong with me. I just wanted something sweet to eat.ă
ăHave you eaten yet, Miyagi?ă
ăNot yet.ă
ăThen Iâll make you some tea and we can eat together.ă
Sendai-san says smiling and in a good mood.
ăIâm okay with that, but what about dinner, Sendai-san?ă
ăI ate before I went to my part-time job.ă
ăThen, weâll eat cake together.ă
I went to the common space with Sendai-san. As she declared, Sendai-san started preparing to make tea, filled a white electric kettle with water, and turned it on.
ăThe cake, where did you get it?ă
ăJust look at the fridge.ă
Sendai-san opens the refrigerator as if obeying my voice.
ăAh, that store. Itâs a place with a reputation for being delicious.ă
ăHave you ever eaten there?ă
ăI donât. Mio said it was delicious, so I thought Iâd go buy some after the exam.ă
I donât dislike Komatsu-san, but I donât have a strong affinity to her. Itâs not a pleasant feeling to think that someone who is not happy with her opinion has bought a cake from a store that she recommended to Sendai-san.
Since the cake is also a thank-you to Sendai-san, I am happy to buy a cake from a store she was interested in.
I guess I should think so, but my feelings are not as good as I would like them to be.
ăâŠWhat did Komatsu-san say she had for cake?ă
I ask Sendai-san, who is closing the refrigerator and putting out mugs and plates.
ăI think it was shortcake and Mont Blanc.ă
ăâŠSendai-san. If you eat the cake, Iâll give you an order.ă
ăAn order, you mean, from New Yearâs?ă
The morning I slept with Sendai-san in her bed, I made a promise to her that I would do what she said if she stayed here. That promise, that I could give orders, remained on hold.
ăYes.ă
I answered shortly and touched my flower-shaped earrings.