It was a sensation he was already familiar with, but it still stung his skin for a bit.
A myriad of laments echoed in his head.
Reason told him that he was already pushing it, and that he was already at his limit.
However, he didn’t waver in the slightest. Nor did he have any regrets.
Eleanor’s body silently rocked in tears — and he forcibly pulled the filth overflowing from her into him.
“I want to be able to protect you.”
The filth came from all the ill will that she kept since she was young.
Pretending not to see, putting on a strong front, changing her dreams into ‘becoming a saintess’ — it was the other side of her heart that was covered in the mask of ‘purity’.
Once she realized these emotions, they turn into filth, pouring out of her like tears.
It wasn’t out of pity that he took it all in, without erasing them.
It wasn’t because he was engulfed in deity-like mercy.
His reason was actually a far more selfish one.
“I want to become an existence that you can rely on. I won’t allow you to cry for anyone else.”
All the words that came out of his lips were words clamoring for change.
Gone were the days when he thought it would be fine even if nothing changed.
The peaceful life between the two of them was no longer enough.
He didn’t want to see her cry for Eric.
He didn’t want her to hurt for someone else other than himself.
He wanted to be someone that would realize that.
It was an emotion that would never cross his mind if it was the original him.
More virtuous than anyone else, more compassionate — cold-heartedly fair to all.
It was the imperfect human heart that shook him, the one who was supposed to be perfect.
The sticky filth intruded his heart like poison.
The resounding [jealousy] in his mind made her remember what [special] meant.
He learned to distinguish [her] and the [others] from the voice of superiority complex ringing in his ears. The voice of [resentment] taught him to [hate] the person who made her cry.
All these foreign, nauseating emotions stirred his heart.
The heart that was once pure had become stained with filth, and it was painful, as if he was burning.
And yet, despite all of these, he never thought of releasing Eleanor.
“I want to accept your heart.”
The lamentation of corrupted people wreaked chaos within him.
It was a human’s heart.
Because humans are imperfect, they always suffer from pain and grief.
He still didn’t let go, despite being in the midst of the heart-wrenching pain that seemed to tear him apart.
“I want to be somebody who can purify your heart — Eleanor-san.”
He unwittingly put some force into the arm that was wrapped around her waist.
She tried to turn towards him in shock, but he covered her eyes with his other hand.
“Please do not turn around. I don’t want you to see my unsightliness.”
He leaned his back onto the wall, and hugged Eleanor closer to his chest as he shook his head.
His short hair loosely swayed.
When he blinked, the darkness that enveloped him for a long time had already cleared.
Two eyes reflected the slightly curled hair of the girl that had always been by his side.
“…Kami-sama?”
She seemed uncomfortably puzzled, so he smiled at her, despite knowing that she couldn’t see him.
He then heaved a sigh, before speaking once again in his usual calm voice, breaking the silence of the room.
“Cry for now, Eleanor-san, until your heart feels better.”
He felt faint warmth surging beneath his fingertips that covered her eyes.
Hot tears welled up in the corners of her eyes, but she tried to quietly choke it back, and make it stay there —
A single drop of tear rolled down her cheek, and she could no longer endure.
She finally cried out, as if setting the heavy load she was carrying down.
Hi everyone, Hanazakura here, thanks for reading! Hope you enjoyed this chapter. Hungry for more? Great news! You can read 5 chapters in advance for as low as $3 at . Early access reading (per chapter) is also available now at Foxaholic 18 ! Schedule for this novel is two free chapters per week. 🙂