Volume 4 Chapter 21
ā€œEleanor-san. I don’t believe nothing happened at all, the way I see it.ā€
Kami-sama quietly but clearly refuted my words.
He wriggled as if shaking his head before sliding off the bed.
ā€œSomething must’ve happened. What on earth might it be?ā€
He crawled towards me while speaking.
I could sense the seriousness behind his words, and it made me clench the rag in my hand.
ā€˜I know.’
Kami-sama was concerned about me.
He noticed how abnormally I was acting, and he was worried about me.
It was a happy thing.
A thing to be grateful for, even.
I knew that, I knew that in my head.
ā€˜But —’
ā€œIt’s nothing.ā€ Kami-sama stopped in front of me, but I averted my eyes.
I didn’t want to see his jiggly appearance right now.
ā€œReally, nothing happened, promise. That’s why please don’t worry about it!ā€
I spat those words out before turning my back to Kami-sama.
I glared at the wall before angrily scrubbing it with my rag.
Even so, the irritation I felt didn’t subside.
The black emotions that swirled within me, and I gritted my teeth to stop myself from taking a ragged breath.
ā€˜I should’ve just taken a day-off today.’
It was too ridiculous of me to diligently come to Kami-sama’s room considering what happened yesterday.
Why did I have to worry about him after not seeing him for a day? Just why did I have to think that I should bring him food?
ā€˜Even though I’m just a proxy.’
I became more irritated by the second as my mind turned.
No matter how hard I scrubbed the wall, the scenes yesterday kept on flashing in my mind with no intentions to stop.
ā€˜Amalda was the one chosen for this role, and yet she forced this on me.’
In reality, it was Amalda who was supposed to be here, not me.
I glared at the dirt on the wall that wouldn’t come off no matter what, before shaking my head in disgust.
Unwittingly, I looked around me, and the shadows in the poorly lit room filled my view.
Kami-sama’s room was dark even at noon.
Moreover, it was very cramped, shabby and extremely old.
The furniture that looked as if it didn’t belong here all came from Lidianne.
He couldn’t even get his own food.
The priests treated him poorly. No one, not even the saintesses, treated him humanely.
And besides, more than any of that —
ā€œEleanor-san.ā€
I still had my back on him when Kami-sama called out to me.
It was really obvious from his tone that he was very worried, but I unwittingly gritted my teeth harder.
ā€œI’m concerned about you. I can’t leave the ā€˜current’ Eleanor-san alone.ā€
I couldn’t see what Kami-sama looked like now since he’s behind me.
Even so, I could imagine how he must be trembling like usual.
His round and black body didn’t have any human traits in it, but he was probably peering at me.
Anyone would be repulsed by his appearance.
ā€œPlease feel free to talk to me about what happened. I can only listen, but ā€”ā€
The voice I heard from behind me was gentle beyond words.
His soft voice was infused with tenderness, shyness, and even familiarity — but I didn’t want to listen to it.
ā€˜Even though I don’t want these wicked thoughts.’
I couldn’t stop my mind from thinking.
Saintess Amalda with the Supreme Deity Granverite, known to be a peerlessly handsome man.
The priests gave her special treatment. Father and Eric were so smitten with her that they didn’t even have eyes forĀ  me.
ā€œEleanor-san.ā€
The bottom of my heart felt sticky, more like goo.
I couldn’t help it, I couldn’t stop these emotions from overflowing.
I didn’t want to think about it, I didn’t want to say this, but —
ā€œI want to be your strength.ā€
After hearing those powerful words, I whirled around to face the black mass before me.
I breathed hard as I stared at that gently jiggling appearance of his.
ā€œStrengthā€
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My voice trembled as the words spilled along with the ragged breath.
Kami-sama stiffened as if bracing himself.
However, it was too late.
The words were out, I couldn’t stop them.
ā€œYou ā€”ā€
The overflowing emotions were undeniably filled with spite.
My face warped because of my ugliness that was way beyond more horrifying than Kami-sama’s wretched figure.
ā€œJust what can you, the Incompetent God, do!?ā€
Silence filled the room at that instant.
Kami-sama shook heavily without a word, obviously hurt.
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