Back in the room, I played the piano to calm my mind. Normally, I would have pressed the keys with caution, but now it was up to me.
Jane was ill. That sickly child had been taken out for a brief moment.
I was more worried because I knew how much Roam cared for her. It had only been one day since Mrs. Roam passed away.
The eyes of the Roam employees who looked at me would not be good. Even if nothing wrong occurred, it was something I could normally fix.
My gaze once again turned to the innocent bonnet.
‘If I am the reason why Jane is bedridden…’
Would he look at me with the same face again? I couldn’t say for sure. Maybe he would be angry. The reason Milena was treated coldly by her husband in the original book was also because he was overprotective towards his younger sister Jane.
While I was lost in thought, mindlessly watching and hearing the keys on the piano being played, a hard hand lightly pressed on my shoulder. My heart sank for a moment.
He sat next to me gracefully and looked at me. The performance was already interrupted and my gaze was directed to Siegfried’s face.
The question roughly sounded like ‘Is it Chopin?’ This tune I was playing belonged to Braham who made quite a name for himself during his time. He was a composer who reminded me of Brahms in my previous life.
He continued, ‘It’s been a while since I played the piano… ‘ in a low voice and moved his outstretched fingers to replay what I had played.
Those words seemed to be a joke, but it was strange that there was technique embedded in the performance. And the fact that a callused hand could play such a beautiful piece of music. His finger pressed on the white key firmly, and I was suffocated for no reason as if he had pressed me with that finger.
He still kept his eyes fixed on the piano and pulled his lips up.
“It’s the first time since my father died.”
“That human is already dead in my eyes.”
He turned his head and said, looking at me.
I knew that because he wouldn’t have been so easy-going if she wasn’t.
He rose from his seat and took the bonnet on the piano with one hand and pressed it on my head.
The mischievous action gave me a chill.
It was what I expected, but my heart pounded.
I stared stiffly at my two hands on my knees. The way he spoke was calm.
“Did she beg you to exchange it?”
I stood up and looked at him. He furrowed his handsome eyebrows as if he had not expected such a violent reaction.
“I asked for her to exchange it.”
“Because the jewels are pretty and shiny.”
I took off Jane’s bonnet and said I was the one who asked to trade hers for mine. I coveted Jane’s bonnet with so many jewels. What would he say now?
‘At least he wouldn’t be offended if I didn’t put the blame on his sister…’
I looked at him with nervous eyes, and he took a step closer.
He noticed that I was trembling. His hand caressed my cheek. He lowered his head at a close distance and whispered.
“You don’t have enough jewels?”
He lifted my chin and made me look at him. He lowered his head, placed his lips on mine, and tickled them with his tongue. My chest was beating with nervousness.
The kiss didn’t last long.
I thought what we had in the morning was a kiss for a contract, but he stole my lips again casually. After a short kiss, he swept my lower lip very slickly. Then whispered in my ear.
“Then you have to say so.”
Huh? He kissed me on the cheek like a gentleman and moved on.
I stood staring at Jane’s bonnet for a long time.
It was a cold night in the mansion once the commotion was over, and I was sitting alone on the bed, looking at the night sky that spread across the wall. Outside the spacious balcony window, the moon was especially large.
Come to think of it, I thought I knew why the butler gave me that bad look. My husband, as always, was not in the room late at night.
I thought my husband’s absence itself was not bad. I felt suffocated when he was around. The bare feet that touched the floor inadvertently shrunk for a moment. It was cold.
It was even darker when such a large space was immersed in the night. Just because I didn’t love my husband didn’t mean I was not lonely, I just fell into bed and looked at the canopy.
The expensive duvet always swelled up, swallowing me, and settling down a little late. No matter how many times I blinked my eyes, Roam’s splendid Phoenix crest was still in the dark.
Even at this moment, I was worried about Jane. I care about her as much as Roam did.
All the affection that should have been directed towards me was wrapped around that sick child. She didn’t even stay in Roam for long anyway. On top of that, the child’s liveliness that fascinated Roam was precious to me. I hoped the child would recover.
In an atmosphere where even darkness seemed to have been swallowed by silence, the cool footsteps approached.
I hoped the knock wouldn’t be heard because my husband wouldn’t knock.
Recalling the butler’s unpleasant gaze, I straightened my back. Then the door opened and I saw my husband’s eyes.
My husband was wearing the perfect outerwear attire for the night as he came into the bedroom. It seemed as if he was about to go out. The leather vest on the shirt, which seemed to be swallowed up by the darkness, shined in the dim light. My gaze that was about to go down rushed back to his face.
It seemed that my eyes were on the place that should not be reached.
I desperately looked him in the eye as if I was giving him a useless sign. His gleaming blue eyes left behind an instinctive fear.
Siegfried curved his eyes and smiled beautifully. With a thud, he approached me. His hand stroked my hair.
It was as if my head under his hand was a very lovely and precious thing.
He caressed my cheek and pressed his lips against it as he pleased.
When I didn’t say anything, he played with my curly hair with his fingers.
“It’s prettier when it’s loose.”
He lifted my hair, lowered his head, and kissed the tip of my hair. He looked at the end of my hair with a slightly lingering look and loosened his hand to brush my honey blonde hair.
“…why do you always put your hair up?”
I remembered the butler who gave me that ‘look’. I wondered if I should tell him the truth.
“I enjoy doing this.” (Siegfried)
His fingers brushed against the blue diamond necklace.
“I’m afraid someone will take it.” (Milenia)
The answer came out quickly. Then his hand that was slowly fiddling with the necklace stopped. The silence was strange, and I turned my head and looked up at him.
He was looking at me in silence. Without hesitation, I said,
“The butler, I think he has a bad stealing habit. …I feel like I was tempting him to steal just by showing it off like this.”
The question of whether to believe this outright lie was up to him.
“Because he keeps staring at the nape of my neck with a vicious gaze.”
Roam’s people are reliable. They are the ones who should never let Siegfried down. They had to be faithful only to their work.
In the fairy tale I read as a child, the treasure cave became a sand castle that collapsed helplessly for someone who touched anything other than the magic lamp.
Likewise, even in this palace-like place, if a worker touched the things of the owner, the wealth and privileges that could be enjoyed as a servant of Roam would be futile and vanish.
They had to be kept in line, and they usually knew their place.
Knowing this, Siegfried had every right to trust Roam’s employer (butler) more than me. He had known the occupants of the mansion longer than I had, and as far as I knew, they were faithful to Siegfried.
Of course, the butler, who was interested in something other than my necklace, would also deny it.
But nonetheless, this should be a warning. The level of warning that I was offended by the butler’s suspicious behavior.
Siegfried looked me in the eye and asked me again. I nodded at him with conviction.
I hope you’ll believe me, or I hope you’ll somehow find the message I’ve hidden in it. The butler was after me.
He answered as if he knew. As he straightened up again, a body scent similar to that of a male pheromone wafted from him.
I remembered that night and bit my lower lip.
I thought that I had to be alert in front of the beast, so when I looked at him, his gaze was glued at my lips.
His gaze was just as sweet as a drop of honey slowly sinking down.
I asked him. I grabbed his vest because I didn’t want to lie. He glanced at it and looked at my eyes, which were not very keen on the subject, and laughed slowly.
I forced myself to speak with my mouth. His fingers fiddled with my lips. When I opened my mouth to answer, he took the opportunity to put his lips between mine and dug in.
His firm hands supported my waist that was about to collapse in surprise. I gave more strength to the hand holding the vest. It must have been the skin that once covered the beast, but the leather touching my fingertips was cool with no temperature.
His lips moved and his hand wrapped around my hand holding the vest.
His hand took my hand off his vest.
When I said the lie of a one-sided love that didn’t even exist from my mouth, the cold eyes of that time scanned me right now.
“If you had held something else in your hand… I would have stayed.”
He left those words and turned around. Soon the door slammed shut and I finally calmed down.
I stared blankly at the pattern of my white pajamas.
The next day, I opened a small bookcase in my room. I was startled looking at the rolled white sheet, spreading splendidly as it fell to the back of my feet.
I had not yet come to terms with what happened last night.
I remained hardened for a long time. I scanned the red bloodstain on the sheet and pushed it away with my foot.
It was the bed linen from the night when I first slept with him.
I didn’t know which servant put that in there, but this was an over-the-top prank.
As I turned my head, I saw a golden string hanging from the side of the bed.
‘It’s a losing battle if my husband takes the side of the servants.’
After thinking for a while about calling the servants and holding them responsible, I strode to open the door of my husband’s office. And I froze on the spot.
It was because my husband aimed his pistol at Alberto, the butler, with an expressionless face.