Chapter 14

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<h1>Chapter 14 – Cheek Exercises, Luxurious Carriages, and Acknowledged Feelings</h1>

 

“Yansho province[1]?” Taizen nodded when I asked back dumbfoundedly.

 

Yansho is the administrative center of a province that includes the prefecture in which this town is located. A province, like a region in Japan, comprises several prefectures.

 

Yansho is surrounded by rivers and the sea, which makes it easy to distribute goods, and it is said to be prosperous in terms of trade and commerce. I think I heard that Yansho is the largest city in the country, even though it is not the capital.

 

If I were to use an analogy, it would be like the relationship between Washington and New York in the United States, where the political and economic centers are divided.

 

So it is more urbanized than here, and getting to Yansho takes roughly about a week. I had previously inquired at work when I had documents to ship for Yansho.

 

“I see.”

 

When I looked down, my eyes wandered in agitation.

 

Since Taizen said he was working as an official, I was certain he would do well.

 

I recalled to when my peers had been promoted. I was devastated and felt indescribable disappointment, but we celebrated by throwing a drinking party. I looked down, smiled, and gently raised my head.

 

“Congratulations. I guess you got promoted. I’ll miss you.” I put on a sincere smile.

 

At my smile, Taizen narrowed his eyes painfully. Soon after, he responded back with a smile as well. “Thank you.”

 

While feeling the pain in my cheeks[2] that I forced up, I couldn’t say anything more.

 

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“You’re not feeling well.” The unusual caring voice coming from Kouka made me turn my head and nod slightly.

 

“Ah,.. actually you haven’t been feeling well for the past 3 days.” Shurin said this in succession, and I smiled wryly and nodded once again.

 

Since hearing that Taizen was leaving far away on his next off days, I’d been trying not to think about it at work and pretending to be cheerful. However, after three or four days, I was exhausted and felt nothing but emptiness. But if they had thought something was wrong with me because I was acting so energetically, I would have felt like a complete idiot.

 

Even after learning in Japan that I was infertile and that my engagement had been called off, I continued to work hard so that no one would notice how depressed I was. Yet, I was in such a state of shock when one of my friends went away for the day.

 

“Shall we go shopping for a change?” In response to Shurin’s kind suggestion, I lifted my gaze and alternately looked at the two of them. While they probably didn’t think this, I thought it would be challenging to be with someone as bitter as me. As a result, I gave a slight nod. Shurin reached into her desk drawer and pulled out a pouch bag filled with money.

 

“Please buy some sweets for yourself. It can be anything you like. Do you know where the store is?”

 

I nodded in response to Shurin’s question and accepted the pouch bag. There were several high-end confectionery shops near the city’s wealthy district.

I’ve been told before that if someone asks me for fresh sweets during work, I should just buy one of them.

 

She added, “It’s okay if you’re a little late. Take a detour or something.” I tilted my head and nodded pitifully to Shurin, who raised her eyebrows while looking worried.

 

“Thank you very much.”

 

While being sent off by the well-dressed store clerks, I left the store with baked confectionery like an egg tart.

 

Then I noticed a luxurious Chinese-style carriage parked diagonally across the street. Considering the wealthy class is close to the area, the roads around the store are neatly arranged, and there is no sense of discomfort even if a luxurious carriage is parked.

 

As I looked at it, the hood of the carriage lifted up, and I could see the familiar platinum hair. I gasped quietly at Taizen’s appearance, slowly alighting from the carriage. But it’s not close enough for my voice can reach him. where voices can reach.

 

When Taizen finally got off the carriage, he held out his hand inside the carriage. Another person’s delicate fingers rested on his hand.

 

My heart began to beat heavily.

 

A beautiful woman of noble status with beautifully decorated dark blond hair descended from the luxurious carriage with the help of Taizen. Come to think of it, Taizen’s clothes are gorgeous and different from usual.

 

The two of them standing next to each other were like a painting, a perfectly magnificent sight.

 

I just stood there frozen and waited until they disappeared into the store across the street.

 

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After I bought the egg tarts and went home, Shurin and Kouka invited me out for a drink after seeing me even more depressed for some reason. It’s been two days since we promised to go out for a drink, but for some reason, I was constantly thinking about Taizen with a woman.

 

I let out a soundless breath and looked at the small cup of tea in front of me. Today, it’s not a place with a nice bartender but a place where the main focus is women who like to eat.

 

 

Today, it’s not a place with a good bartender but rather a place where women seem to prefer to eat. They were leaving, and I was sitting in the restaurant I had just entered, waiting for them to arrive. I was idly waiting for them to arrive at the restaurant I had just entered, so I sipped my tea slowly and looked up to see a family with small children diagonally in front of me. As I watched them, I sipped my tea.

 

Looking at the happy family, I thought I would also like to have children. I realized how long it had been since I had felt that way. However, I had been very content since becoming friends with Taizen, and I was no longer in a hurry to have a child.

 

Nonetheless, Taizen’s face and kind smile abruptly flickered inside my mind. Although I felt happy for him[3], and I felt happy, but then I realized I’d never see him again, bitterness overwhelmed me once more.

 

“So, did something happen with that insanely handsome man?” As soon as I finished ordering, Kouka nonchalantly asked me about Taizen. [How did you know it’s Taizen’s fault? I wonder if this sixth sense is unique to women…]. In response to Kouka’s question, I decided to be honest.

 

“…Actually, that handsome guy was the one I talked to you about last time…”

 

At my revelation, Shurin and Kouka nodded as if they knew. I felt awkward and scratched my cheek.

 

“But after that, we became friends, so there really isn’t anything… but this time, it seems like he’s going far away, and that’s…”

 

When I spoke, the two of them made thoughtful expressions.

 

“That’s… I think it would be good for you to confess your feelings for him.”

 

I was surprised by Shurin’s words and raised my head.

 

“Eh?”

 

When I asked back, they both looked at each other in disbelief. [That hurts..].

 

“… Kouhei-san, are you not even aware of your own feelings?”

 

“What about me?” I made a stumped expression.

 

“Huh… When I met a handsome guy at a bar, you glared at me with terrifying eyes, didn’t you? Those eyes were crazy with jealousy. Well, I was also in a hurry[4], so no matter how you look at it, I’m sorry that I jumped in between the two of you, who weren’t actually just friends…”

“I was jealous of you.”

 

Shurin’s and Kouka’s words reminded me of what happened at the bar. It’s true that my emotions were boiling, but were my eyes that crazy with jealousy?

 

However, I remember when I was dating my ex-girlfriend, when she found out that there was a person of the opposite sex who was on good terms with me. At that time, I didn’t feel like I was about to be swallowed up like that, it was more like an instantaneous rage of anger.

 

[Now that I think about it, I really do like Taizen.]

“Eh?!”

I raised my voice in surprise and confusion at the conclusion that came naturally to my own thoughts. Embarrassed to have raised my voice, I frantically looked at Shurin and Kouka. Both of them had gentle expressions on their faces. I felt uncomfortable.

 

“Urghhh…Something… what is it? It’s like I’m talking to a newbie in love…it feels like I’m talking to a first-timer… Of course, you’re older than us, and usually, you’re calm when you have a problem at work. But now, I really feel like I’m older than you instead… ” (Shurin)

 

“Huh…I understand your point. It makes me want to lend a hand, or it makes me want to intervene unnecessarily… Of course, I’m usually unsociable, but I accepted you with a big heart. Thinking about it, I do really feel like I’m the older one.” (Kouka)

 

My face turned red when I heard both of them. [I certainly have the personality of a 30 years old man, but as for being an Ω, it is really my first time. So when it comes to love, why do I look so pathetic in their eyes right now?].

 

It seemed that they were observing me in other areas as well.

 

“I think that Kouhei-san likes that mischievous beauty?”

 

When Shurin asked me to confirm, I let her gaze wander, but in the end, I relaxed my shoulders and nodded obediently.

 

That ‘first-timer’ phrase had quite an impact. There’s indeed no way I, a first-timer, wouldn’t fall in love with that perfect man’s character. I was afraid that it wouldn’t be reciprocated even if I fell in love with him.

 

Finally, I was able to honestly accept myself.

 

[1] I don’t know hot to pronounce it in Japanese, since the literal translation of the Kanji is Yangshuo. After researching, its name is based on Yangtze River, China, one of the most important river in ancient China mainly for sea trading and irrigation system for farming.

[2] Kouhei is forcing himself to smile.

[3] Leaving for his job.

[4] Finding a partner.

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Translator’s Notes:

 

Yay! More emotional development from Kouhei! It took us halfway through the series to finally hear him admit his feelings for Taizen. Poor Taizen won’t be hearing this anytime soon. (っ °Д °;)っ

 

Anyway, we’re reaching the 2^nd half of the series!!! Woohoo!🎉

The next chapter will be this Wednesday, hopefully!

 

p/s: Join my Discord for updates if you haven’t yet!