Chapter 34

Editor: Anna

Proofreader: jlycen

Zheng YiJia and Chen ErXin had already confirmed their departure time for their flight.

I also made an appointment with Zheng YiJia to meet in the coffee shop. When I arrived, she was already sitting there and upon noticing me, she waved.

I glanced at my watch, walked over and sat down. “You came so early that I thought I was late.”

Women are privileged in the sense that no man would mind waiting ten more minutes for them.

Zheng YiJia said with a smile, “This kind of trick can only be used on those members of the opposite sex with whom you have an ambiguous relationship, but never between friends.”

I met her no more than three times, but I got along with her well. It was true that fate was important between people. Many people had friends they knew for many years, but were only casual friends.

Like how some people in long relationships may not have  a true mutual understanding of each other, people meeting for the first time can feel like old friends too.

As I thought of this, I recalled He Li and felt relieved. We had been together for four years but had never truly known each other. How sad it would be if we had ended up together. I should be very glad that I was able to leave this early.

The waiter came and Zheng YiJia ordered a blue mountain coffee while I asked for a latte after some deliberation.

As the waiter left quickly, Zheng YiJia looked at me in surprise. “My cousin said that you had always liked black coffee. Why did your taste change now?”

“He’s speaking nonsense. All along, I had a sweet tooth so how could I like black coffee?” I was also surprised as I didn’t know where Chen ErXin got this impression from.

“He said that when you’re studying, he used to see you drink a large cup of Italian espresso without any change to your expression, often making him shudder with fear.”

I supported my forehead with my hand. Chen ErXin had misunderstood me again.

When I was young, I was frustrated with Lu QingFan. So, after my monthly routine phone call, I would feel so miserable that I would torture myself with bitter coffee. At that time, I had thought that I could fight poison with poison.

I didn’t know that Chen ErXin would assume that I love black coffee. Thinking back, it was no wonder that he ordered a cup of mandheling coffee for me the last time. I almost thought he was trying to kill me with the bitterness of the coffee to vent his anger.

Listening to my words, Zheng YiJia understood what had happened too. “My cousin probably thought he was being smart again.”

She clearly knew her cousin’s temperament well.

“He’s still angry and thought that you’ve lied to him. He’s remaining insistent on not wanting to see you so I’m the only one here to say goodbye.” Zheng YiJia couldn’t help asking me, “You still wouldn’t tell my cousin about your illness?”

“I didn’t mean to hide it from him but I just didn’t know how to tell him. The timing was also unsuitable so I kept on putting it off.” I thought about it and continued, “Besides, it’s cancer and not good news so it’s still inappropriate to spread it around. Whether I live or die is also my own personal business.”

Zheng YiJia suddenly faced me. “No, your life and death are not solely your own personal business. Your life will involve all the people around you and no matter if it’s love or hate, it will still entangle others with you. If you disappear without any reason now, it will definitely be a major issue. You have underestimated the power you hold.”

I didn’t know how to respond to her words.

Luckily, it happened that the coffee was delivered at this time. After the waiter left, Zheng YiJia went on, “But you’re right and all this is your own personal business. If you don’t want to say it, I’ll keep it a secret for you.”

I smiled bitterly, “I have always thought that I’m insignificant. After all, there are so many people in the world and I’m only one of them. However, after listening to what you said today, I suddenly find myself indispensable.”

Not wanting to continue with this topic, she then asked instead, “How is your condition?”

“Perhaps a miracle will happen.” I had already wasted so much time. Even if Meng SiQi didn’t say it, I had a vague sense of it.

Despite that, Zheng YiJia did not feel sad for me. She looked at me and said slowly, “Do you know that a miracle is only called a miracle because it has happened before? As long as you believe in it, it will come true.”

Touched by her words, I told her, “I will remember the words that you say.”

Before saying our farewells, she asked me for the last time, “Are you really not going to tell my cousin?”

I nodded. “I hope that he will think that I’m still alive somewhere in this world. Perhaps till much later, when everything had settled down. If I let him know now that my time is running out, it will just disrupt his life.”

“My cousin will never think that you are doing this for him.”

I shook my head. “Actually, I’m just thinking for myself. I’m afraid that Chen ErXin would pull me along to die together after he knows about it.”

When she heard that, she sniggered and patted my shoulder. “I hope that I can still meet you the next time I come to China.”

“Certainly.” I gently smiled, “I have an obligation to let the world know that miracles are still present in this world.”

As she looked at me, her eyes suddenly turned red while tears clinged to her eyelashes.

She came over and hugged me. “Goodbye, Pei JiYu. I’m really happy that I was able to meet you.”

I also hugged her back tightly, “Goodbye. Goodbye.”

In the evening, Meng SiQi called me over and gave me a handful of colorful pills.

“Here’s some rainbow candy.”

I looked at the painkillers packed in the box which were mixed in a pile of different colors. At first glance, they almost looked real.

I gave Meng SiQi a smile. “You went to work and neglected your duty. Be careful, the hospital may fire you.”

He said with a smile, “You think too much. I wouldn’t waste my work time doing this for you. I did it during my lunch break.”

He also told me that my second phase of treatment had been fixed and it was the day after the announcement of my father’s will.

Meng SiQi told me, “You would have to do blood tests before that.”

“Can something go wrong?”

He comforted me, “It’s just a routine check. You’ve been in a good condition recently so there won’t be any issues .”

However, I still felt unease in my heart as I really didn’t have confidence in myself.

That night, I fell into a dream again.

The scene in my dream was very realistic, and I could still remember it vividly when I woke up.

I dreamt that I was still a soft and tender child with delicate hands and feet. Both Father and Mother were also still alive and they each held one of my hands. They were leading me slowly down a path full of white flowers.

I was so young that I didn’t know anything except joy. As a gentle breeze blew on my face, I laughed happily.

When I turned around, I saw brightly coloured butterflies flying among the flowers, lightly floating up and down. Enticed, I let go of both my parents’ hands and ran to the flowers along the sides of the path with joy.

The flower shrub was as tall as me. I gently pushed it open and stretched my hands towards a butterfly carefully. Seeming to read my mind, its wings flapped a few times before it stopped in my palm.

I was astounded and stared at the butterfly in my palm attentively.

It was at this time that a light wind came from an unknown location and gently brushed by. The butterfly in my palm also went along with the wind and in the twinkling of an eye, disappeared. I became anxious and looked around in a hurry but was still unable to find it.

As if I had lost a treasure, I wailed bitterly. I murmured “Mother, Father” as I looked towards their direction with tears. I thought that they would always be waiting for me and would come to comfort me.

However, when I turned around, I suddenly found myself panic-stricken as there was no one there.

I was also no longer the pale and tender child. In a moment, my bones developed and I had  grown into an adult.

However, I was unwilling to grow up and stood there with tears, feeling vacant and mournful.

In the middle of the night, I was shaken awake by Meng SiQi. He told me, “For some time, I was unable to wake you up from your nightmare.”

I sat up with cold sweat on my forehead.

“I dreamt of my parents leaving me and I couldn’t catch up with them,” I said as I described the scene of the dream to him.

I continued, “For half of my life, I’ve been making mistakes and now I can’t even forgive myself.”

“There’s an old Chinese saying: ‘If you know what’s wrong, you can correct it and that’s the best thing that could happen’. JiYu, there is no mistake that cannot be corrected. In the past, you chose the wrong route so from now on, just walk back slowly. Don’t worry, I have enough patience to wait for you to come to me.” He opened my hand and gently stroked the lines on my palm. “I’m not the butterfly in your dream that will fly away after staying for a moment. I’m the lines on your palms that will follow you for your whole life.”

I couldn’t help but gripped his hand tightly.

Hoping that the heavens would give me enough time to correct my mistakes.