Time flew by quickly for children .
Soon enough, I had become a six-month-old baby .
There wasnât anything different about turning six months old, but I did have one good news . I could sit up! Now give me applause!
When I turned around five months old, even I felt the difference in my development . I started to slow down in growth which made me think it was a bad thing, but seeing as how Serira remained calm, I guess it was normal at this stage . I managed to put more strength into my legs and hands, so I thought I could start crawling but damn! My hopes were dashed . I ended up pushing myself on my stomach and failed numerous times . Numerous times I wailed inwardly and looked for Serira, so I could ask her when could I start crawling .
âOh, my Princess are you sitting up again?â
Yup, I really wished for this to happen .
I unconsciously answered her and realized suddenly . When did you get here? When I was playing with my toys, Serira appeared out of nowhere and looked down at me .
Really, sitting up again? Wasnât it obvious? You shouldnât say it like that .
I giggled and Serira laughed with me .
Serira could now see her child once a month because I played well with the other servants, so she could relax and visit her child with peace of mind . Maybe thatâs why she looked happier these days . It felt like she was growing prettier day by day .
Ah, to be honest, I didnât like the other servants, but for Seriraâs sake, I tried my best to play along with them .
âPrincess, please eat this . â
I cocked my head as she pushed a bowl in front of me .
Wasnât this solids? Itâs solids! Yum!
I would eat it, but wasnât it too early to eat solids?
Then I remembered how my nanny would spend a long time checking out my mouth after she bathed me . I think she was checking if I had teeth⊠I had teeth now!
Ah, was that why I was starting on solids? Oh, could I start talking now?
Even I thought that that wasnât a sound a human could understand, but these days, I felt so light-hearted I unconsciously let out screeches . Damn . I wasnât a monster .
âHere, say âah~â . â
As soon as a spoon came toward me, I automatically opened my mouth . What nanny usually gave me was fruit . Today, itâs fruits again . The only difference was I had no idea what kind of fruit it was because itâs mashed beyond recognition . Also, my taste buds were dull due to the fact that I only had milk for several months .
Anyway, this was delicious!
âEat slowly . Good girl . â
What kind of fruit was this? I unconsciously asked her, but unfortunately, no human words came out . Serira ended up patting me on the head and that was the end of it .
Damn, I had to get out of this baby phase, so I can actually do something .
âWas it that delicious? Good girl . Have some more . â
Yup, thatâs right . For now, hand over that bowl . It was pretty good . I felt like Columbus discovering a new continent . Was this a whole new world?
It was solids, but instead of chewing it, it was more accurate to say I was just swallowing the purĂ©e whole . In other words, it was like drinking fruit juice . At first, I thought solids were too much for me when I didnât have teeth, but Serira was a master at early childcare development .
Serira, youâre the boss! I believe in your abilities!
As I ate up the small snack, Serira smiled and left the room .
I looked down at the toys in my hands as I savored the lingering taste of the fruit I had earlier . I sighed thereafter . The toys were all the same kind . You either had to match shapes or look at shapes . To be frank, they were all boring .
Think about it, it would be boring to just play with those all day .
Let me play games instead! Battle royal! I wanted to play a shooting game .
As I sat there in my crib with a sullen face matching the shapes, I fell into deep thought . Now I know why babies were so sensitive . This world was too big for me alone, and the things I could do were few . Even if I could move my hands and feet, there was nothing I could actually do . The only emotions I could express was happiness or displeasure . Itâs just those two . There were only two ways I could emote those emotions . I could either cry or I could laugh .
How uncomfortable was this body?
Yet mothers could figure out what the baby wanted and needed just by hearing their unpredictable cries . Their skill was mysterious like magic . I felt uncomfortable just watching them . If I had a baby of my own, could I do the same?
If I managed to grow up well and find my other half whoâs just right for me, get married, and have a baby, I wanted to be a mother like Serira .
This was how much affection she gave me . It was simply immeasurable .
Well, I always heard a parentâs love was like the heavens .
âNow, princess, letâs go to his majesty . â
No, I didnât need a Dad .
Caitelâs day started as early as five in the morning .
Anyway, the first thing he would do after waking up was sword training, so his body wouldnât get rusty . He would finish that around seven . Then he would have breakfast and go with Ferdel to attend government meetings . After he finished his business around twelve, he would have lunch with Ferdel . Then he would just shove himself in the study, looking over paperwork until heâs ready to gobble on his dinner .
âJust leave it around there somewhere . â
Caitel said, not even bothering to lift his head from his papers . Serira entered the room very quietly, like a specter, Caitel always knew what was going on .
Anyways, heâs a specter . A specter I tell you .
I shook my head for no reason when Serira looked at me .
Serira laid me down in the bassinet without another word .
Some time ago, a bassinet randomly appeared in the study, but it was smaller than the one in my room . However, the important thing was that this new bassinet moved easier than my other one .
To think that thereâs a moving bassinet .
âMay you reach Evangelium . â
Serira finished her greeting and left the room .
It had been just the two of us in this room until I was five months old, but suddenly ever since one fateful day, it was just me alone here with Serira on standby outside the door unless Caitel called for her specifically .
Now that I thought about it, itâs weird . âWhy did we start doing that?â
I wondered for just a minute .
I looked dully around the study . Well, to be accurate, it was a break room .
Caitel had already made mountains of papers around him . He was sitting on the sofa with a messy appearance; studying the papers with a dry look .
Hmmm . I sighed . I leaned my head against the guard for no reason and stared at him through the rails .
The break roomâs lights were always a bit dark . There was bright sunshine pouring out from the large window the size of the wall, but we both avoided going there .
The window led to the garden in the great outdoors, but that wasnât any of my business .
After seeing Caitel always on the attack, I was surprised by how he looked in such a quiet atmosphere . To think his attitude made such a difference . The air around him simply fell to the ground . It all seemed to belong on a different place, like his own island .
When Caitel was alone, it was always like this . No, when it was just him and I, I could see him like this .
I hated it . I wanted to break the silence .
At my sudden outburst, Caitel threw his papers sideways and looked at me . Then he laughed .
After tossing his papers, he pulled the bassinet slightly closer to him and patted my head . As he watched me, he slightly laughed . It was a very slight laugh .
âYou grew quite big . â
He saw his baby brat every day, yet he always said the same thing each time . Rotten jerk .
He had no interest in me . No interest at all .
It was not like I wanted it, yet at moments like this, I wanted to ask him âWhatâs wrong with you?â I couldnât help myself from feeling this way . Should I say it was pathetic or should I say it was annoying? To be honest, I didnât know . It justâit made me feel down .
All right, I would be big-hearted and stop asking you to go study child development . However, Dad, how about tutoring sessions with Serira?
Three days! Learn everything about kids!
I heard people do that nowadaysâŠ
âNow you are starting to look a bit like a human being . â
Then, father, were you saying I didnât look like a human before? Was that what he was trying to say? Huh? Did he want to get his ass kicked? No, would he like to get smacked instead then? I honestly wanted to beat him up . Before, I felt hurt by his words but, now, there were none of those feelings .
I was just speechless . I had no words, just hollow laughter .
How should I describe it⊠Liberation?
Yes, I must be feeling liberated from him . Ah, then would I reach complete enlightenment?
The guy just laughed as I made a rotten face and stuck out my bottom lip .
Then, he grabbed his papers with his left hand and stroked my head with his right . I leaned against the guard while getting stroked by him . Caitel enjoyed petting me a lot more than I thought he would .
I wonder why? I thought he hated any kind of human contact .
All gazes were always directed toward one place, him .
âApril . River overflow causing mass flooding, one-third of the area had eight thousand people washed away . The Utrecht alliance will have poor crops this year too . â
Since I lifted my head, Caitel removed his sights from the papers and just looked at me .
His face was a bit like a scourge, but besides that, it was a flawless beautyâŠ
However, it still looked like the face of a jackass to me .
âCoventry next to it, if we play our cards right, we can eat it quite easily . Itâll be okay, right?â
Look at the words youâre saying to a baby who didnât even know the meaning of the word âcoventryâ .
I didnât agree with him or denied him . I just simply stared at him .
One day, we randomly caught each other looking into each otherâs eyes a lot so I stopped smiling each time he looked at me . At first, I thought my life was over, but Caitel didnât go around jumping about to kill me . When I realized it didnât affect my life right away, my liver grew big and now it came to this . I just sat there with a shitty face .
Thatâs right, you could just bark by yourself . I would just play by myself .
âThe Emperor of Praezia is surprisingly quietâŠâ
I didnât know if he was bored, but he listlessly flipped over a paper and dragged my bassinet toward him . Then, while looking straight into my eyeballs, he lowered his arms on a cushion and lifted his chin .
âHe wonât forgive me for killing his daughter . â
The moment we looked into each otherâs eyes, I compulsively called out to him .
Caitel didnât laugh . He just stared at me .
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