When I woke up, I was lying down in a place I had never seen before.
I blinked my eyes and thought about where I was, then slowly got up.
It was a big room. There was a television, a refrigerator, and an additional bed. I would have assumed it was a hotel room if I hadnât noticed the plaque âOmega Centerâ on the wall.
As I went through my memories, I remembered that the last thing I saw was Choi Sung-hoonâs face, which had been distorted by anxiety and nervousness. And I remembered all the nonsense Iâd told him.
Perhaps I should jump off now. What floor is this?
It was uncomfortable to move because of the IV stuck in my arm. When I looked at it, I noticed something strange.
It was an IV. But what was the significance of the test line on my stomach? It was linked to a large machine, and on the machineâs screen was something resembling a heartbeat curve graph.
Wouldnât I be dying if that was my heartbeat graph?
I blinked and felt my lower abdomen.
At that moment, there was a commotion outside the door.
ââŠSo, just in case donât give it any affection, ahâŠâ
The doctor looked at me and stopped talking with a bewildered look on his face. Choi Sung-hoon, who looks bigger and more vicious today, appeared behind him.
Choi Sung-hoon approached me right away. He sat down on the chair next to the bed and gently pushed my shoulder to make me lie down again.
âYou woke up earlier than expected.â
âWhat time is it nowâŠ?â
âAbout three hours have passed.â
Choi Sung-hoon looked angry. He wasnât even emitting pheromones, but a vicious and terrifying energy arose. A middle-aged doctor with glasses and a nurse with several carts could not approach.
Now that I look at it, Choi Sung-hoonâs chin was rough. The hair that had always been neatly raised was also down. He wasnât wearing a suit or shoes, and the scar on his cheek seemed to have turned a brighter red. Choi Sung-hoon covered my hand with heavy energy.
âSeo-yu ssi, do you remember the last call?â
âYes, I guess I was a little drunk and drunk. Iâm always doing embarrassing things in front of Choi Sung-hoon ssiâŠâ
âDo you know who I am marrying?â
I donât know. It must be a dominant Omega, right?
âI donât know who it is, but congratulations. I heard youâre expecting, so I wish you a happy family. Iâm not going to hold you back.â
âYou? His name is a bit unique.â
âSeo-yu ssi, itâs you.â
Choi Sung-hoon flexed his tangled fingers. The black eyes were staring at me. His eyes appeared to be filled with pain.
âI had no idea youâd think that while Iâm doing something unusual for me just because you requested a unique marriage proposal.â
Choi Sung-hoonâs voice was rough. He swept his hair roughly.
âHow the hell do you operate that little head to think of me as such an asshole?â
I couldnât understand. What heâs talking aboutâŠ
Was he teasing me? Maybe it was a dream.
It sounds like you were going to marry me.
âWhat did I do⊠Itâs more foolish to think that your sex partner might propose to youâŠâ
Choi Sung-hoon took a deep breath and repeated his words, âSex partner?â Meanwhile, he was clutching my hand like it was the last rope.
âI just⊠thought I had no idea where this relationship was going to go.â
The scarred cheeks twitched. He glared at me like a raging fire.
âI was having a crush on you.â
Shit, it was truly mind-blowing.
He was cursing, oh my god. He cursed at me. The sexy curse came into my ear first and followed by the recognition of the content.
You had a crush on someone?
My heart was pounding. The doctor who was looking at the screen inside the machine came quickly.
âSir, donât get too excited. I understand the frustration, but itâs not good for your pregnant body.â
The doctor pointed to the screen and stopped it. I blinked at the doctor.
âYou have to be careful. Even when choosing a word, you should refrain from cursingâŠâ
Choi Sung-hoon frowned without answering.
He didnât even look at the charts the doctor push in. He was just looking at me.
He seemed to be attempting to calm my excitement in some way. My big heart swelled and then subsided.
I slowly drove the excitement away. I tried to find a reason.
I think the doctor just said pregnant.
What the hell was going on?
I could only come to one conclusion.
âChoi Seong-hoon ssi⊠Are you pregnant?â
Choi Sung-hoonâs voice rose.
âHow do you come up with ideas like that?â
As his voice grew louder, the doctor approached him and said, âNo, Director. Please calm down,â he advised. Choi Sung-hoon spits out curse words. The nurse next to me informed me.
âSeo-yu, pregnant, it seems to have been about 11 weeks. The placenta is very small, so you need to do a detailed examination at the exact time.â
âYes, youâre pregnant.â
âNo wayâŠÂ I donât think so.â
I put my hand on my belly and explained that there had been a misunderstanding. Choi Sung-hoon looked at me, intent on hearing what I was trying to say again.
âIâve been taking contraceptives regularly, so I wonât be able to get pregnant.â
âContraceptives pills?â
âContraceptives pills?â
The doctor and Choi Sung-hoon both spoke at the same time. They made eye contact. Choi Sung-hoon exhaled âHaa,â as if disheartened.
âYou were taking contraceptives? You said you want to have a family. But you take contraceptives?â
I stroked my lower abdomen. My belly was flat without any bulging. It was so flat that I didnât even think there would be a life here.
The doctor approached me in disbelief. He handed the chart to me. When I flipped over the paper with the complicated English written on it, a piece of paper with a black background appeared.
It was an ultrasound picture.
The doctor asked Choi Sung-hoon and me for permission before applying something to my stomach. Then he took one of the numerous mechanical devices besides the bed and placed it on my stomach.
âLook at the screen.â
On the large monitor that had been turned on, something flashed. In the black background, there was something resembling white noise.
âThis is the head and this is the leg. Itâs crouching down. Iâd estimate 11 to 13 weeks for growth alone, but it could be less.â
It was too small to be called life. It was huddled and crouching. Just as someone who has only experienced painful things hides under a blanket and refuses to open his eyes again.
âI am a recessive. I also took the contraceptive pill regularly. There was no sign.â
âDirector Choi is extremely dominant. I heard that Director did not use any contraceptives, but it is difficult to prevent pregnancy with only post- contraceptives. May I know what kind of contraceptive pill you are taking?â
The doctor spoke softly like warm milk. He took notes after I told him what kind of contraceptive pills I was taking. Colorful pens hung in the front pocket of the white robe.
âAre you really a doctor?â
âYes, Iâm the Choi family doctor.â
âAm I really pregnant?â
When I asked, Choi Sung-hoon next to him exhaled heavily as if disheartened again. The doctor told him not to sigh in front of a prospective mother and responded to my question.
âYes, youâre pregnant. You have a child. Youâre pregnant.â
âBut, I took too much medicine. I took tranquilizers and sleeping pills.â
When I told him, the doctor, who had been trying so hard to keep his composure, also frowned. When he asked for the name of the tranquilizer, I gave him the counselorâs contact information. I couldnât remember because the name was complicated and there were a lot of prescription drugs involved. Choi Sung-hoon was concerned, and the sound of his breathing became rougher. I also confessed to drinking because I shouldnât hide it anyway.
âI also drank today. Makgeolli.â
âItâs a relief if itâs makgeolli⊠Were you sick up until now? It appears that you are suffering from morning sickness.â
âYes, I vomited everything I ate, and there was blood coming out of the bottom a few times, but I had no idea it was bleeding.â
Choi Sung-hoonâs eyes flashed. I was holding Choi Sung-hoonâs hand with one hand and stroking my stomach with the other. Choi Sung-hoon then covered the back of my hand that was stroking my stomach.
âWhy didnât you tell me?â
âYours is so damn big. I thought it was torn.â
âOf course, you should have told me, even if it was torn and bleeding. You also should have told me right away when you vomited.â
âThereâs nothing to be proud of when it comes to dirty stories. If I said something like that, you would be offended.â
Choi Sung-hoon was almost emitting his pheromone now.
âVery⊠Itâs very easy to make a fool out of a person.â
âDirector, good words. I fully understand your feelings, but you have to use good words.â
âYou played with me like a dog.â
âGood words. Director, good words.â
Choi Sung-hoon frowned fiercely and told the doctor to shut up when he kept trying to stop him. After a brief moment of thought, the doctor immediately stopped speaking.
Choi Sung-hoon was frustrated by himself, saying, âShit, is a dog a curse word?â as if his anger had not gone away. Of course, I didnât think it was a curse either, and Choi Sung-hoonâs âShitâ was sexy, but I pretended to agree with the doctor and nodded my head.
âItâs a curse word. You have to say good things in front of the fetus. And Iâve never played with it. Every night, I prayed that Choi Sung-hoon would play with me and let me stay where I am.â
Choi Seong-hoon looked at me with a strange expression on his face. My conscience was pricked because I was not religious, but I looked at Choi Sung-hoon with daring and innocent eyes.
Funny enough, he held my hands tightly even at this moment.
âProfessor Chae, go now. I have a lot to talk about with this person.â
Choi Sung-hoon looked at me and ordered the doctors and nurses to leave. They touched several mechanical devices and adjusted the IV once.
I asked him to give me the ultrasound picture. The doctor, who was called Professor Chae, handed it to me with an ambiguous expression and spoke to Choi Sung-hoon a little before leaving.
âYou must remember, Director. Donât give it any affectionâŠâ
Choi Seong-hoon drove the doctor away. When he came in here, the doctor also said something like donât give it any affection. I pondered the sentenceâs meaning.
Choi Sung-hoon and I were the only ones left in the big hospital room. The temperature in the hospital room was mild, and I was wrapped in the worldâs warmest blanket. And I had just heard such a miraculous story that my heart continued to pound.
I placed my hand on my flat stomach.
I got pregnant. Iâm really pregnant.
Itâs a miracle to have a baby.
Although I forgot for a few days, I took the contraceptive pill quite regularly and lived on sleeping pills and tranquilizers. The baby must have been in pain and sick, but it persisted and made me know its existence.
The baby must have been screaming its existence all this time. Its presence was announced by many signals, but I didnât notice any of it.
Now that I know it, I want to feed it only good things so that it can be born in blessing and love and grow up in a happy family.
I raised my head and looked at Choi Sung-hoonâs expression.
Choi Sung-hoon was constantly making wrinkles on his brow.
He sent out the doctor saying he had a lot to talk about, but somehow I could figure out why he didnât say anything. Perhaps heâs holding on because heâs afraid heâll swear at me again and get angry.
The Omega that Choi Seong-hoon was talking about with his parents that day was meâŠ
I honestly couldnât believe it. I just found out that I was pregnant, but how can they notice it first, and what was Choi Sung-hoon lacking that made him want to marry someone like me?
I regarded him with suspicion. When our gazes met, Choi Sung-hoon tried to relax his expression. I wanted to touch his beard, which rose sharply on his chin. I reached out my hand, but Choi Sung-hoon raised one eyebrow and stopped me.
He must have been very angry, but he didnât know how or what to say.
âSeo-yu ssi, I have never loved anyone, and I have never been in a relationship.â
âItâs the first time Iâve ever experienced a change in personâs actions and words, so there are a lot of things Iâm not very good at.â
He confessed his flaws to me first. He soon continued slowly.
âI thought we were lovers. You want to get married⊠You said you wanted to have a child before you got older, and I havenât used contraception since the first time-.â
âDid I say that? When?â
I didnât have any memories, so I interrupted him and asked.
âYou was drunk when you said that.â
âIâm a good drinker. Donât make it up because I donât get drunk easily and remember everything.â
âYou said you wanted to get married before you turned 30. If you want to have another child, they should be at least three years apart. If there is too much age difference, the eldest child will have more responsibility. You also said that you wanted the first child to be a son and the second child to be a girl.â
âItâs a thought that anyone can have.â
âYou said that you wanted to go to a regular cafe and argue about the childrenâs tuition and utility bills there during the evening hours when the crowds are the biggest. You âll take family photos at the local photo studio every year, and each time the owner says itâs the first time heâs seen such a close family and asks if itâs okay to display your photo in front of the studio, Seo-yu ssi will answer as much as he wantsâŠâ
âYou are right. You can stop talking.â
I bowed my face that was flushed with embarrassment.
What was I talking about when I was drunk, and how much did I sayâŠ
Choi Sung-hoon caressed my cheek and I looked at him. One of his hands was still softly and firmly holding my hand.
âDecember 11, do you remember?â
Choi Sung-hoon said the exact date. It was my heat cycle period.
âI donât remember very well what happened when I was in heat.â
âI know. I knew you couldnât remember, but I thought it would be fine, and I thought it wouldnât matter if you didnât.â
Choi Sung-hoon grabbed my hand and brought it to his lips. My hands, held in his big brown hands, looked very thin and fragile.
âI have been since then.â
Choi Sung-hoonâs expression as he kissed the back of my hand while saying that was so complicated that I couldnât guess what he was thinking.
âDid you think we were lovers since that day?â
âI misunderstood that, but I know that you donât remember because you went on a blind date.â
Choi Sung-hoon stopped talking. The atmosphere turned cold in an instant.
It must have been a bit absurd to him. His lover was looking for his blind dateâŠ
On Christmas Eve, I remembered Choi Sung-hoon at the place where I was meeting the so called blind date.
If it had been such a meticulously planned meeting⊠Wasnât it cute?
âThen you thought it was the first day from Christmas day?â
â⊠Around that time.â
Choi Sung-hoon, who responded bluntly, was very cute. But I didnât laugh.
I was hurt by myself, so I shut down my heart and took medicine that I shouldnât have taken on my own because I misunderstood.
What the hell happened to my personality as I grew olderâŠ
Even now, I still couldnât believe Choi Sung-hoonâs words.
âI definitely felt that Seo-yu liked me as well. Am I mistaken?â
Choi Sung-hoon was angry enough to swear, but only his pheromone was completely displayed. From the first time I saw him⊠Unlike others, he did not use his pheromones to apply pressure on me.
Perhaps the seed was already planted in my heart at that point.
I have to trample hard on this feeling that has grown high..
âIt doesnât matter how I feel, Choi Sung-hoon.â
âFortunately, we werenât lovers, so you donât have to take responsibility for me. I have no intention of holding you back just because I have your child.â
I smiled as much as I could.
I could deceive this feeling that he was experiencing for the first time as love. I could get married like this now that I knew I was pregnant and make the rich familyâs extremely dominant Alpha responsible for me and my child for the rest of my life.
But I couldnât let his life go to waste that way.
âChoi Sung-hoonâs feeling is not love. Itâs just a curiosity and shallow liking for types that you havenât experienced. Itâs not a good idea to marry with this feeling.â
I tried to invoke the truth and withdraw my hand, but Choi Sung-hoon strengthened the hand he was holding. His gaze was unwavering.
âI love that point of you.â
âNow that I know you, itâs fine. As I change, so will you. Now that I know what you need, slowlyâŠâ
He kissed the back of my hand again. Then he stood up and approached me.
Choi Sung-hoon leaned in closer with a body that felt even bigger today. He looked me straight in the eye and said, holding me in the middle with his arms at the head of the bed.
âIâm in a one-sided love with you right now, and Iâm determined to work had to court you in order to win your heart.â
Unlike his sweet words, his eyes were so scary that I thought I had misheard phrases like, âIâm in a crush right now, and Iâll threaten you hard to win your heart, so be prepared.â
âNo, Choi Sung-hoon ssiâŠâ
âSeo-yu ssi is pregnant, and I am the father of the fetus. Think about it one more time. Donât make decisions right now.â
My lips were closed again at the sweet and warm words were uttered as if he was determined. And the handsome man right in front of me, asking me to think about it for a reasonable reason.
Choi Sung-hoonâs lips fell over my closed lips.
I closed my eyes after the rough lips, cheeks, and rough chin collided.
The miracle baby needed a father. Maybe Iâll be able to start the family Iâve always dreamed of.
I should have refused firmly for Choi Sung-hoonâs sake, but no word of rejection came out. Even though I know his feelings were genuine at the time, they will eventually fade in the blink of an eye in his lifeâŠ
I closed my eyes, turning a blind eye to everything, with the warm lips on my lips and the hard touch on my cheeks.