Chapter 32

“Sigh….”

 

“Your Highness… Why do you look so serious?”

 

Ellie seemed to have no idea about how serious this situation was.

 

How could she say that they were about to die because the Emperor was threatening their lives?

 

Helen gave up on her desire to speak as she was speechless and only fidgeting on her own.

 

She swept away Ellie’s hair that came out with her fragile hand.

 

“I will protect you.”

 

I couldn’t protect him, but if it’s you….

 

Helen adamantly vowed to herself. She couldn’t let Ellie die because of the sins which were committed by her.

 

Therefore, she had to confess. She had to confess and apologize for what she had done.

 

She should have accidentally told her about his secret before they both got killed.

 

Then Ellie would leave her.

 

“Ellie, you don’t know anything. Understand?”

 

Helen pressed the end of her words as if demanding her to answer.

 

As she continued to demand an answer, Ellie nodded.

 

“Yes, Your Highness. I’ll do that.”

 

She didn’t know what her master was planning to do when she said so, but Helen’s face seemed slightly relaxed when she answered that way.

 

Helen was so pretty as her eyes bent slightly when she had a thin smile on her face.

 

Just like her shining blonde hair, there was a twinkle in her eyes everytime she smiled which led to her thinking there were indeed stars in her eyes.

 

“Thank you.”

 

Helen buried her head on Ellie’s shoulder like a pampered kid.

 

Even though it was her first time to touch her master like this, Ellie hugged Helen as if it was natural for her to do that.

 

Helen felt a deep sense of relief in Ellie’s assuring embrace. And the sense of responsibility inside her grew bigger.

 

‘I’ll definitely protect you.’

 

The thought of not being able to help the man made her heart ache, forming another guilt in her already shattered heart.

 

People became unfortunate whenever they met her.

 

She meant the man and Ellie… Perhaps it was my fault…? Just like what my father said, it’s because I was a misfortune. Because I’m ugly.

 

No, it’s not the time to feel discouraged. She had to meet the Emperor.

 

‘I have to protect Elly.’

 

Ellie asked about the medicine, but Helen had no intention of telling the matter to her.

 

She couldn’t say that she didn’t treat the dog, but the man who was trapped in the Emperor’s library.

 

“I can’t tell you about that, sorry.”

 

“Do you not really want to tell me? I’m really worried for you….”

 

Helen shook her head. Her hair tickled Ellie’s neck because she buried her head in her maid’s shoulder.

 

‘Sorry.’

 

She bit hard on her lips.

 

Ellie gave up on her attempt to ask because it was difficult for her to take a proper look at her master and only caressed Helen on the back of her head.

 

‘It wasn’t that serious. His Majesty would obviously like her as well… What is Her Highness thinking about?’

 

Love was a little bit like a spring breeze, but Helen’s head was a bloody brutal thriller. Ellie thought that love felt a bit similar to a spring breeze, but it was like a bloody cruel thriller for Helen in her mind.

 

They were hugging each other for a while while having different thoughts.

 

***

 

The next morning, the concubine’s residence was filled with a chilly atmosphere. Among all of them, the concubine who caught the Emperor’s interest was the last and the one who had been shunned by them.

 

Especially Ersa, the First Concubine, was worried because it was clearly known that she led other concubines to do that.

 

What if Concubine Edith, who was favored by His Majesty, asked him to depose her?

 

She didn’t want to be kicked out from the palace just like Cecillia. She would never be able to return to her homeland and justify everything.

 

Ersa, nibbled hard on her lips, and eventually beckoned to the maid.

 

“Go and tell Concubine Edith to have a meeting with me.”

 

The maid opened her eyes wide, as if she was slightly surprised at that.

 

She also felt embarrassed. She completely ignored her and now she had to find her. Her circumstance was so funny and she was displeased at that.

 

Since she was the First Concubine, she thought the Emperor’s affection would naturally turn toward her.

 

Ersa anxiously chewed on her nails.

 

***

 

“I heard that you requested my presence.”

 

Helen appeared in the private garden placed in the backyard of Ersa’s abode.

 

She seemed to be curious about the reason why she called her with a look that didn’t show any signs of bewilderment.

 

“First of all, please take a seat.”

 

Ersa stood up and greeted Helen.

 

Of all people, it was Ersa who called her today, even though the woman had ignored and avoided her until earlier, so Hazel was curious about the reason.

 

‘Do we have any relation with each other?’

 

Moreover, only those who were specifically chosen by Ersa could enter this private garden. It was the first time for Helen to pay a visit here.

Well no, it was their first time talking to each other.

 

After Helen sat on the chair, Ersa’s maid brought refreshments and black tea.

 

Cake, cookies, and pudding were served on the table.

 

Helen caught something with her eyes that she had never seen before.

 

She pretended to be as suspicious as she could, but Helen was distracted by the yellow soft pudding.

 

“Take a bite. I have prepared this for you.”

 

“No, it’s fine. If you wish to say something, please do.”

 

Helen wanted to take a bite of the pudding, but looking at Ersa who only took a sip of the black tea without touching the dessert even after filling the table with it, she came to realize the situation she was currently in.

 

Although they were both princesses, she was born differently.

 

Ersa, who shows elegance in her every single gesture at just a glance, and herself who were swayed like a reed at the sight of pudding.

 

She suddenly lost her appetite and pushed the pudding away with her hand.

 

“I will be honest with you.”

 

Ersa’s tranquil eyes came in contact with Helen.

 

“I’m just curious about how you won His Majesty’s heart.”

 

“…I didn’t.”

 

“You did.”

 

“N-No….”

 

Her habit while speaking, which she tried hard to hold back, unconsciously came out again.

 

Because Ersa’s obstinate eyes were terrifying.

 

Ersa said while looking at Helen, who quickly covered her mouth with her hands.

 

“You did. You fainted that day so you might have not seen it and didn’t know, but you definitely won his heart.”

 

Ersa chewed on her lips after finishing her words.

 

After she realized that Helen was in front of her, she hurriedly controlled her expression.

 

Arrogant Princess.

 

She had probably never been treated this way in her country.

 

When she asked this sort of question, her pride was hurt and Ersa’s face turned red.

 

She only wanted to win the Emperor’s heart.

 

‘The situation can turn out to be different like this.’

 

Inside her mind, she was mad at God and nibbled on her lips while just fiddling with the teacup.

 

Last night, Ellie also asked this question.

 

How did she get close with His Majesty?

 

So she became more wary of other concubines.

 

She was still sparkling even when she was dying.

 

“I was wondering why His Majesty kept you by his side.”

 

Ersa let out a deep sigh.

 

She acted like a fool. She didn’t expect the absent minded woman would meet the Emperor when she was being carried away by that small rumor.

 

“Did you hear that rumor?”

 

“Rumor?”

 

“Yes. I thought you didn’t know.”

 

So it’s your turn now.

 

I will make you as shocked as me.

 

The corner of Ersa’s eyes were bent upward with a very precious smile that could have deserved to be called as the manners of a noble.

 

“It is said that His Majesty’s a gay.”

 

“So?”

 

What did the Emperor’s sexual preferences has to do with her?

 

Helen’s eyes seemed as thoughtless as a dead snakehead.

 

Ersa looked very bewildered from her gaze.

 

“…Isn’t it a very important issue especially because you are the concubine of the Emperor?”

 

“It is.”

 

Helen’s answer was enough to drain Ersa’s energy.

 

It sounded like an important matter from the way she told about that information with a lot of energy, but Helen was calm as if she just heard something that she had nothing to do with.

 

Was it because she was curious and she acted as if she knew the Emperor had set up a visible wall between him and his concubines?

 

But that was a misunderstanding. It was just the ‘man’ who got involved between the Emperor and himself. Others misunderstood because they didn’t know about it.

 

Helen brought the teacup near her lips and took a sip of black tea to moisten her mouth, which had been drying up continuously since earlier.

 

It had a deep and warm taste that she had never tried back in her abode.

 

“I’ve never tried to seduce him, and I’ve never even had that kind of thought before. Last night was just a misunderstanding.”

 

Helen tried to speak as calmly as possible.

 

She thought that she would stutter again when she made eye contact with Ersa, therefore Helen continued to talk while staring at the leaves floating inside the teacup.

 

“I see.”

 

Ersa answered in a calm manner, but her mind wasn’t.

 

She was a woman who had been annoying to her from the first time they met.

 

Her face was serene, the way she acted seemed a bit naive, but she was pretty.

 

Yeah, this was how the unprocessed diamond looked like.

 

She looked like a stone, but she was actually a gem.

 

If she was dressed-up beautifully, treated properly, and pampered well, she would be a million times prettier than this.

 

Looking at who smiled even at the petty things, Ersa was overwhelmed with the terrible sense of compulsion.

 

If the diamond couldn’t be processed, it was just a stone.

 

Ersa wanted to have all of the Emperor’s attention just for herself. If the treatment of her, who previously became a princess, had been relegated once she became a concubine, she had to return to the position that she was supposed to get.

 

‘I must become an Empress. That’s what I have to do…!’

 

In Idelberg, she knew that the concubine wasn’t simply a concubine, but they were actually war prisoners.

 

Did she really have nothing to do with the Emperor, just like what she said?

 

Even if nothing happened between them, how could she not be bothered by the fact that the Emperor was gay when everything about the Emperor was the concubine’s concern?

 

If the Emperor was gay, the road ahead of them who became the concubine was clearly stuck.

 

Or did she have any convincing reason to believe that the Emperor was not gay?

 

Ersa’s face became stiff. Helen got up first because she didn’t want to keep sitting on her seat anymore.

 

“If you don’t have anything more to say, I will be returning to my now.”

 

“…Feel free to do so.”

 

A little wrinkle appeared between Ersa’s forehead.

 

The woman had a placid face and she couldn’t guess what the hell the woman was thinking.

 

He shrugged her shoulders and casually brought up her words in a calm manner.

 

Even if it was in front of the Emperor, or her.

 

Helen bowed her head and bid her goodbye before turning around.

 

***

 

She couldn’t believe that she was called and was asked how to win the Emperor’s heart and that the Emperor was gay.

 

‘Disappointing….’

 

She turned around with subdued gaze and headed back to her room.

 

Throughout her way back, Helen’s head was full of concern related to the Emperor.

 

So he was the one who saved her back in the hunting ground? Since there was a bear in front of them, it would have been hard for him to pretend not knowing anything regardless of him being an emperor.

 

‘But he carried me in his arms and acted sweetly in front of people.’

 

That was the hardest thing for her to believe. The last time she saw the Emperor, he was a man who was far from being sweet.

 

The man had a formidable spirit.

 

It was difficult to say something due to the cold aura that surrounded him. She was so embarrassed at the way her voice trembled when she was helped by him.

 

‘Is he trying to stop me from speaking out about it?’

 

Her step came to a halt on her way back to her abode.

 

‘Would he even bother to stop me from speaking out?’

 

Wouldn’t he just have to kill the 27th, no, the 26th concubine who didn’t even become anyone’s interest from the beginning?

 

Gulp.

 

When she imagined the blood splashing everywhere, Helen’s eyes shook violently and her mouth dried up.

 

‘I-if he doesn’t want to kill me and is asking me to keep it a secret by stopping me from speaking out, I have to respond by not saying any unnecessary things.’

 

Helen stumbled and could barely make it back to her abode. The distance between the First Concubine’s abode, Ersa, was so far that it made her legs tremble.

 

When she returned, she saw Ellie standing idly at the entrance and randomly biting on her nails.

 

“Your Highness!”

 

Ellie immediately rushed to her as soon as she spotted her.

 

“Why, what’s wrong?”

 

Ellie’s nails looked like a mess. She held Ellie’s hand and looked at it while Ellie was speaking.

 

It didn’t bleed….

 

[t/n: she’s so pure and innocent, protect this gurl omg]

 

Ellie wasn’t just flustered. She might also have broken into a cold sweat because her hair was stuck to her forehead and flowed down to her neck.

 

“In… In… your room….”

 

“What is happening? Why are you so nervous?”

 

Ellie looked around and beckoned as if telling her to lower her head. When she bowed her head a bit, she whispered in a hushed voice in her master’s ears.

 

“Your Majesty is in the room.”

 

“!”

 

At that moment, she felt like her back was protruding out.

 

Finally, the moment has come. The day has come, when she couldn’t avoid this any longer.