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Episode 57: In the Shadow of the Future (I)
My fingertips were cold.
‘Actually, it’s only natural for him to despise me.’
Rixus did say he would kill whoever it was when such an evil being appeared.
He was the main character of a fantasy novel, and the main character’s goal was to save the world.
I wouldn’t be able to beat that setpoint.
‘I have to hide from Rixus.’
My hands that held the tableware were sweaty from nervousness.
‘Until I’m convinced that the blue roses won’t bloom…’
He had to be unaware of everything I knew.
I put the utensils down.
“I have no appetite. I’ll skip dessert.”
His gaze turned to the plate I had not touched.
“Did you eat it?”
“…Yes, I just feel sick.”
I averted my gaze and got up naturally from my seat.
Then I slowly walked towards the door.
I could feel the gaze from the blue-violet pupils sticking to me tenaciously.
“Then, we should go for a walk together. Let’s go out to the Imperial Palace for some shopping.”
There were quite a few options. Somehow, I could feel his willingness to spend more time with me.
But I stood at the door and knocked twice.
Because of the thoughts I just had… I just wanted to get out of this space quickly.
I felt like I was trapped in a beast’s cage. I felt tension, as if those sharp eyes that were fixated on the back of my neck would bite me.
I barely made eye contact and roughly uttered,
“Sorry. I’m busy.”
At that moment, Rixus got up from his seat without hesitation.
“!”
I glanced at him without realizing it.
Upon hearing my knock, the doorkeeper carefully opened the door.
“Berylia.”
But when I saw the approaching Rixus, I couldn’t just leave.
“……Yes?”
Rixus finally stood in front of me.
I didn’t know if it was because of my nervous heart, but I felt that Rixus was huge today.
His black shadow was so large that it completely swallowed me up.
Ah… His face now. The face of Rixus that I originally knew.
A cold expression that couldn’t be read.
Seeing the expression I had not seen in a long time made me nervous.
Rixus gazed directly at me and pushed the door slowly with his large hand.
Tak–!
The sound of the door closing made my heart beat like it was going to explode.
Soon he opened his mouth.
“It’s been three days.”
The languid bass resounded deeper today.
“Since we saw each other properly… But I can’t believe you’re going to leave like this, Queen.”
I responded coldly to a voice that seemed to have chosen words that were as affectionate as possible.
“Are we obligated to see each other every day?”
I was just as good at putting on a cold expression.
“Your misunderstanding seems to be growing day by day. Didn’t I tell you before?
For an instant, a long finger gently swept my lips.
At the tickling and strange sensation, my eyelashes trembled momentarily.
The remaining words of ‘I don’t like you’ were completely dissolved in my mouth.
“It’s strange.”
Rixus narrowed his eyes and whispered to me.
“What……?”
“It’s like my wife is testing me to go back.”
The dry saliva passed down my throat.
“All night in bed, kissing sweetly, and falling asleep in my arms… Then the next day you were angry like fire.”
I remembered our first night of the engagement. I was angry when he asked to have lunch together that day.
“On the other hand, two days ago, you received my kiss in a very lovely way… and now you are pushing me away again.”
The deep blue eyes covered with red mist persistently dug into me.
“Like a person who has to do that on purpose.”
“!”
It felt like my heart was going out under my feet.
His alertness, which tormented me all the time as a nemesis, was demonstrated without fail even after he had affection for me.
I looked at him like a little animal caught by the neck.
I wanted to avoid that suspicious gaze, but somehow, I felt that I should never avoid it.
He stared at me as if fixated on the prey in his grasp.
“At first I thought it was because you were unfamiliar with me. Because you suddenly became my wife.”
Rixus tilted his head and muttered bitterly.
“But the more I experienced it, the more it doesn’t seem like that…”
“…….”
My heart was about to pop out of my throat.
It felt as if the man, who I didn’t know how he’d change if he found out that I was the one who would ruin Aktoum, would soon discover my secret.
What kind of scent did he smell from me with that alertness?
My mind went blank as if I was standing at the entrance to hell.
“Sometimes you act strangely. Like this…”
Rixus’ big and hot hands very slowly and gently caressed the delicate skin of my arms… It trailed down.
“When I touch you.”
This time, he quickly wrapped his hands around my waist and pulled me forward.
The tip of his nose that stretched out coolly came silently, brushed my lips, the tip of my chin, and collarbone, then came down to my sensitive chest.
There were goosebumps on my back. I exhaled heavily.
Without realizing it, I clenched his broad shoulders tightly.
There was nothing else I could do.
“Or, like this…”
Every time his heated breath touched my skin, I felt a tingling sensation.
He whispered softly with his eyes closed.
“When kissing.”
His lips engraved a strange sensation on my fragile skin.
A small moan, at the very least, was about to burst out.
He was completely embracing me with his face leaning against my arm, then he straightened and stared at me like he was digging through every corner.
“Sometimes you react suspiciously.”
“…What, reaction…?”
I looked up at him cautiously. Like a bird who had both wings caught by a hunter.
I nervously chewed the flesh in my mouth, waiting for his answer.
And, the answer that finally came to me…
It was too harsh.
“Fearful reaction. Of me.”
Without realizing it, I lowered my eyes, unable to make eye contact anymore.
But his large hand grabbed my lower jaw and made me look at him.
“…….”
In front of my two, uncontrollably shaking eyes.
He asked quietly.
“Tell me.”
Blue-purple eyes peered into my abyss.
“There’s something you’re hiding from me.”
It felt like my heart was falling off a cliff.
* * *
“Did everyone hear the rumor?”
Deborah was attending a fancy tea party.
It was sort of like a simple ‘pregnancy party’. The news was that the daughter-in-law of Marchioness Ilmare was pregnant for the third time.
The name ‘Deborah’ was missing from the invitation list of Marquis Ilmare’s tea party, but Deborah inevitably appeared there.
As soon as she saw her, the face of the Marchioness Ilmare became sour.
It was as if she was looking at a devil spreading misfortune to the child in her stomach.
It looked like she wanted to smack Deborah with a peach twig, but the marchioness couldn’t.
Because of who Deborah came linking arms with.
It was Lady Yuria.
These days, Lady Yuria was receiving as much explosive attention as Deborah.
There were two main types of interest.
The first kind of interest – did she really decide not to sell ‘part of the Terra mining rights’?
Most of the nobles interested in making money were paying keen attention to this.
The other one was an extremely stimulating interest – ‘Will Lady Yuria meekly accept the Crown Prince’s marriage?’
Oh my God, her unrequited love was declared so loudly, but now she turned into a dog chasing a chicken?
Moreover, she cried in front of the queen at the last celebration.
Thus, even more so, everyone was curious about her situation.
Of course, even without this interest, Marchioness Ilmare could not say anything to the famous daughter of Duke Mavis.
In the end, Marchioness Ilmare only said ‘Welcome’, then sat awkwardly.
Meanwhile, Deborah knew how to evoke the atmosphere she wanted.
What socialites were most interested in. What they enjoyed the most. It was doing something fun.
As soon as the word ‘rumors’ was spoken, everyone began to focus on Deborah.
“Rumors about His Highness the Crown Prince and Her Majesty the Queen.”
People’s ears doubled in size.
“What rumors…?”
In addition, Marchioness Ilmare was very interested in gossip.
Forgetting to treat her as a demon who committed adultery, the woman asked, her expression showing that she was tempted.
“Are there rumors about the two?”
Deborah looked at Yuria with an elegant gesture, holding a teacup.
Yuria didn’t seem pleased that she was saying such things.
“Well… Lady Yuria, we just need to do this until the Margrave arrives.”
“What is this?”
When Deborah said that, she looked tempted too.
“Trust me today, Lady Yuria.”
“……”
“Please do what I tell you.”
This morning. Deborah wanted her to do two things.
Go to social gatherings together.
And to call someone over to them.
Yuria was just sitting there anxiously.
‘She doesn’t seem desperate yet?’
Seeing that she was feeling uneasy about simply spreading gossip.
‘Just wait a bit. Even without seeing it three times, that child won’t be able to stand looking at the Queen who had the Prince heading to his doom; so whether it was by putting poison or molten iron in her mouth, or causing cramps, she will still want to affect her.’
“It’s a rumor about their bedroom situation, so it’s hard to talk about it…”
“!”
“Please pretend you didn’t hear.”
Deborah drank tea, and pretended to be embarrassed.
But, the eyes of the nobles around them already went ‘Zwing!’ Their eyes had grown wide.
What about the bedroom? Was there a bedroom issue between the crown prince and the queen?
They couldn’t be more curious.
“What on earth…?”
“Don’t stall, just tell us!”