/
Episode 143: Nevertheless
When asked to take it off, Rixus pulled out the buttons on his shirt.
There wasn’t even a sign of embarrassment.
He finally swiped his shirt back and took it off, revealing his angular, broad shoulders and sturdy chest.
My heart was pounding.
‘Why is he so bold?’
Didn’t this guy say he didn’t like being naked in front of other people
?
With the shirt draped over his muscular forearm, he put his hands loosely behind his back and looked at me.
Then he asked lightly.
“Only me?”
‘Only me
? What does that mean?’
After a moment of non-understanding, a handsome face approached my nose.
His sharp, wet eyes were slightly curved in a strange way.
“Or, together?”

Let’s take it off together?!
I slapped him on the chest as if I was startled, and he frowned as he touched the wounded area.
“Oh sorry!”
I apologized quickly. And then I felt awkward and bruised.
“Yes, who’s sly
”
Rixus was right, but there was no sign of offense at all, and he just smiled at me like a big, gentle puppy.
“You’re too pretty for me to stand still.”
‘Why
 are you looking at me with those eyes again?’
It made my heart flutter.
He always looked at me with warm affection in his playful eyes.
When I met those eyes, I tried to understand the feeling that remained only in my heart without knowing its identity.
‘It’s too dangerous.’
To trust everything in Rixus.
My heart, which had been swept away by him but yet set up like a solid wall, had to be wary of falling to him.
Of course, unlike his previous lives, Rixus didn’t seem willing to harm me.
He tried to rescue me from the monster, and he stopped the barbatus dragon’s flame without hesitation.
‘Besides, those eyes
’
Those eyes that couldn’t make me doubt the fact that he loved me.
An expression looking at something very precious and desperate.
“Berylia.”
The languid bass that called me was so sweet; I had never heard it before in my life.
As I felt his warm fingertips gently caressing my cheek, my heart accelerated.
For the first time, I had this thought.
‘I wish it’s real.’
If that love was real, I might have been happy in my 8th life.
I struggled to pick up the heart that was about to pour out on him.
I slowly withdrew from his hand on my cheek, and said with difficulty, maintaining a sober face.
“Don’t talk nonsense. The disinfection area is large, so I’m only here to help.”
“You’re worried about me.”
“It’s more of a responsibility than a concern. Because you got hurt because of me.”
If we see each other face to face, I’m afraid he’ll find out that I’m worried.
I was worried that it would be revealed that I had run all the way here, so I decided to quickly start disinfecting his back.
Soon he turned his back to me.
It was a tight back with clear muscles along the spine.
He was strong like an animal, but he had many scars from fighting countless times.
The scar on his back was proof that my ice spikes had pierced him.
Now, when I saw that wound, I felt both terrible and apologetic at the same time.
Despite this, he did not groan at all, but cried while holding me.
I calmed my throbbing heart for a moment and then moistened the antiseptic pad with a pair of tweezers.
Then I carefully disinfected his wounds. As much as I was worried, it didn’t seem to hurt at all.
“The back part got worse because it wasn’t properly disinfected. Why didn’t you ask the attendants to do it?”
“I just hate it.”
“What?”
“Seeing everything.”

Just didn’t like it.
If it had been someone else, I wouldn’t have been able to guess why he didn’t like it.
It was understandable because it was ‘Rixus’.
Since he was young, he would have to hide himself in the Imperial Palace and survive while pretending to be strong.
Showing his bare body would be showing his vulnerable skin as it is.
I was well aware of the feeling of not wanting to show any weakness to others.
Because it was the same for me.
“
Then what about me?”
I asked. Why were you so relaxed in front of me?
At that moment, a friendly voice sounded in front of me.
“There’s nothing you can’t see, Candy. You’re my wife.”
My heart was warm and it was pounding.
‘In addition
 It makes my heart feel weird.’
It was no longer strange to feel this way in front of Rixus.
I didn’t know what was going on; I was excited, nervous, and I felt good.
Rixus turned slowly and looked at me.
I put a blood-stained disinfectant swab down and picked a new one instead, as if to hide my shaking gaze.
Then I quietly opened my mouth.
“I want to get my memories back quickly.”
“Yes, if you recover your memories, you’ll find the information you forgot. There may be information about ‘that guy’ among them.”
“I want to get my memories of you back quickly.”
“

.”
Rixus’ expression darkened slightly. As if he had heard an unexpected answer.
Why?
Was it because of the constant beating of the heart?
Or was it because of that stupid man holding me in this precarious cliff-like situation?
I lost my memory and for the first time, I showed my honest feelings in front of him.
I put the cotton down slowly and met his shaky blue-purple eyes.
“Not with other people, Rixus. I only have these feelings when I see you.”
“

”
“When we look at each other like this, my heart
 you’re so strange. Just.”
Rixus’ eyes were instantly dyed with emotion.
I continued speaking quietly.
“I love you so much that
”
“

.”
“If this feeling remains.”
So, if it was all forgotten. But that was the only thing I hadn’t forgotten somehow.
“I want to remember
 as soon as possible.”
Then the memory must be a memory that I cherished very much.
Rixus was making a face that looked like he had been cut with a knife in his chest.
The shaking eyes seemed to be asking me clearly. It was asking if I didn’t hate him.
—Wasn’t it terrible that I gave you seven deaths?
If Rixus asked that
 I could answer.
Nevertheless, it seemed that I loved him a lot.
Rixus couldn’t even wipe away the emotions that had stained his face, and he slowly took my hand.
I felt a hot body temperature. My heart pounded, my heart raced.
“Let’s go back to our memories one by one starting tomorrow. We go to the places we went together and do what we did.”
“
.
”
“If you look back like that, your memories will surely come back.”
—If you have such a mind.
Rixus’ words touched my heart greatly.
However
 What if I really couldn’t remember even till the end?
“
If I don’t remember forever, even after you’ve helped me, wouldn’t you hate it?”
If our positions were to be switched, I would think he was too cold-hearted.
How could he forget all those memories?
If I helped, and if that still happened, I think I would be upset and angry.
Rixus just hugged me gently, so gently that it wouldn’t startle me, as if he was approaching a small, wounded herbivore.
His body temperature and characteristic body scent; they warmed my chest, giving me a great sense of stability. As if I had come home.
Filling my lungs with his body scent, I closed my eyes, and in my ears
 Immediately, Rixus whispered.
“How dare I hate you.”
The flame in my heart, which was overflowing with anxiety, was extinguished.
“It won’t happen even if I’m reborn a thousand times.”
Clean without any traces.
“Rixus
”
“So, never worry about that.”
* * *
That evening.
I greeted Duke Orléans after long recalling the warm words that Rixus had said.
I had work to do right now.
Receiving a report on the mutant monster that tried to devour the Aktoum Imperial Palace.
“Your Majesty, this is a report on the ‘Barbatus Dragon’.”
“Give it to me.”
I took the report from Duke OrlĂ©ans’ hand and unfolded it.
It was a report on how the demonic species that tended to avoid humans appeared in the Imperial Palace.
According to the investigation by the renowned mageologists of Aktoum and Spinel, it was said that the ‘Illuminati Mountains’ west of Aktoum were suspicious.
It was mentioned that a strange energy was felt in the mountain range named ‘Illuminati’, which meant light because it was a mountain range where the sun always set brilliantly.
“A frequency that gives power to demons and sends messages to them?”
It had been reported that it affected the barbatus dragon, causing it to become a ‘variant monster’ that blocked magic.
If true, wasn’t it serious?
‘Why
 What’s going on in that mountain range?’
It was one of the most beautiful mountains in Aktoum.
The frequency and content of the message coming from the mountain range were beyond the scope of human interpretation.
This was due to the fact that magic science had not yet developed that much.
‘
Then, Aktoum may constantly be in danger.’
Since Rixus would have received the same report, he would have raised the defense level of Aktoum by now.
Even the part of Spinel that was adjacent to the Illuminati Mountains could not be said to be safe.
I also immediately instructed Spinel to raise the defense to the highest level. I gave it to Duke OrlĂ©ans in writing, immediately stamped with the king’s seal.
“Send this letter to ‘Lucia’ as well. Tell her to come back to me.”
“Yes, Your Majesty.”
A veteran with experience in subjugating monsters was essential.
As Duke Orléans left, a rather strange guest came in, as if waiting for her turn.
“Your Majesty, this is Deborah, who is working as an apprentice maid starting from today
!”
“!”
The three chicks looked at Deborah with puzzled eyes.
Even though I told them in advance that Deborah would come as an ‘apprentice maid,’
When I actually saw it, it looked ridiculous.
‘Me too, chicks.’
I felt the same too.
When I heard Deborah’s request to be my ‘unpaid maid,’ I felt it was like a new breed of dog.
But at the same time, I thought it was an opportunity.
A chance to find out if Deborah was really sorry or not.
‘If she truly repented, then Johann might be right.’
I was so curious that I decided to try her out as an ‘apprentice maid’ for now.
That too, on the same day the request was received. It wasn’t my style to drag things out anyway.
“Deborah, why did you apply as my maid?”
In the original story, Deborah was not a person who wanted to be under anyone, and

According to people, and from what I had figured out, she seemed to have behaved similarly to the original.
‘Deborah, whose pride is like a giraffe castle, will be my maid?’
I rested my chin on my palm and looked at her curiously.
Then an amazing thing happened.
Deborah fell flat and put her forehead on the floor.
“!”
I, too, had no choice but to break my nonchalant expression a little.
“Your Majesty, I can’t be forgiven for doing something like this
 but I just want to pay a little for my sins!”
‘What, what, are you serious?’
‘Why are you putting your forehead on the floor in a burdensome way
?!’
Anyway, I didn’t remember a single thing Deborah did to me.
So, rather than hate, I had a slightly stronger curiosity.
‘Is that the truth
?’
Just when I doubted, Deborah burst into tears.
“I’m really sorry!”
I could see the weak-hearted Seryl’s expression becoming disorganized.
Surely, the woman lying on the floor and pleading for her sins could win sympathy.
However, seeing that the ‘hate’ did not disappear on the chicks’ faces, it must have been that Deborah, whom I do not remember, was very vicious.
At that moment, with a look of half dissatisfaction and half contempt, Laura raised Deborah up.
“Madam Deborah, get up. Her Majesty hates having her maids behave like this.”
That was then.
“No, very good.”
“!”
“Just stay on your knees and bang your forehead.”
Deborah, who had raised her knees halfway, had a momentary look of embarrassment.
Then, she put her forehead on the floor again like a person who vaguely picked up cheap coins.
‘
Look at that?’
Was that the attitude of a person who reflected on that and was truly sorry?
‘Well then. It can’t be true.’
I stood up from my seat, watching her quietly, still clasping my chin.
Then I looked down at Deborah’s forehead.
“You’ll do anything to pay for your sins?”
Deborah raised her head, eyes twinkling. Again, she quickly recovered from her ‘reflection mode’ expression.
“That’s right, Your Majesty
!”
But the next moment, after listening to my words, her facial expression management was shattered.
“Then you will
”
“

.”
“I’ll use you as my ‘slave’.”
“!”
“Do a lot of low and dirty things. That way, won’t your sins be erased even a little bit?”