CH 61

December 25th, 13:15. Tachibana Station.

As Soutarou and I arranged to meet at 13:30, I suppose I arrived slightly early. As expected, Soutarou isn’t here yet.

We’ll probably have a late lunch and go to karaoke or the game center after that. And, I’ll, perhaps, stay over.

I didn’t have any special feelings about staying over at Soutarou’s house until now. However, I’m now filled with complicated feelings because Soutarou carries special feelings towards me. And I’m searching for a response to that. I’m searching for my feelings towards Soutarou.Translator: nakimushitl

Translator: nakimushitl

It will apparently snow a little from this evening onwards. The air has chilled, and is clear and serene.

Having forgotten my gloves, I can feel my fingertips reddening. Cold. I cover my mouth with a muffler.

“Makoo!”

“Ah, Soutarou. Hiya.”

“Hiya. Sorry to keep you waiting. It must have been cold.”

The doggy Soutarou, with his mouth covered by the fur of a mod coat, runs here with a step, step.

His dog ears pop up and the tip of his nose is red. Ahh, cute. It sure makes one’s heart squeeze. This, rather than calling it “like”, I think it’s the feeling of being healed by the cuteness after seeing dogs or cats.

What exactly is “like”? Can some esteemed person teach me?

Translator: nakimushitl

“Yeah…, wanna have something? I’m famished.”

“Anywhere is fine by me. What do you want to eat, Mako?”

Translator: nakimushitl

The angelic power of Soutarou who smiles gently is staggering, as always.

There are even some unknown glittering particles fluttering around him and wing-like things are on his back. As expected of a capturable character of an otome game. CG-like backgrounds are fully prepared.

Nonetheless, it’s that, isn’t it? For such a hunk to like me, life is full of surprises, huh? I’m really grateful to receive good will from others and I’m really feliz that such a lovely person likes me. However, however, it’s, impossible for me.

Be it Soutarou, Kaname or Prince, I like them equally. I can’t fathom the image of kissing Soutarou, much less ufun ahan[1] scenes, which are completely inconceivable. Though sharing a bed won’t happen if we’re not dating… Eh, it won’t, right? However, perhaps such developments may happen on impulse when it comes to high school students… Besides, Soutarou is relatively quick to act for things like that.

Rather, I never dated before so I ain’t got any idea about things like the sequence, tacit consent, or the proper progression, y’know?!

Somehow I contemplated too much that I feel like throwing up. I think I’m gonna be a vomit-ine, Subaru-nee-san.[2]Translator: nakimushitl

Translator: nakimushitl

“… Somehow I suddenly lost my appetite…”

“Eh, Mako, you look pale. Are you okay?”

Whish, Soutarou comes peeking at my face.

I’d be kissing this face if we were to date, huh. His angelic powers are so strong that I may lose my sight.

“I’m good. I contemplated a little too much and had something like a developmental fever.”

Well, the cause of that developmental fever lays mainly with you, Soutarou.

Though if I were to dig further towards the root, it lays with my love deviation value and indecisiveness.

Translator: nakimushitl

“Let’s sit somewhere and rest. Can you walk, Mako?”

“I’m fine, really. Let’s eat, then go for karaoke.”

“But, Mako…”

Soutarou cries “Kyun, kyun” while looking anxiously at me with upturned eyes.

This guy, how sly. It may be sly but he’s attacking from the right angle.

“Ya can just rest at my place if ya ain’t feeling well. My house’s pretty close anyways.”

“That’s right. Mako, rest if you aren’t feeling well…”

“Nah, I said I’m fine… I’m, fi, … ne?”

I reflexively raise my head at the familiar voice and accent.

Behind Soutarou, is the person who should never appear together with Soutarou. The man languidly bending his back while taking the my-head-hurts pose is, Kaburagi Kazutoki, nicknamed Ichigo-chan.

Soutarou stills for a moment before slowly turning around. I can tell even from his back that he’s releasing an unimaginable amount of coercive pressure. Is Soutarou angry? Is he?

Translator: nakimushitl

“Hey, Makoto. … And, Tsubaki.”

“… It’s been a while huh, Kaburagi.”

Soutarou’s voice has clearly lowered by half a tone.

Although he’s smiling gently like when he met me, it can’t conceal the coercive pressure he’s releasing. Soutarou does get like this at times, doesn’t he. He’s a child who clearly expresses his irritation, or rather dismay, when he gets intruded upon. Though fundamentally, he’s a child with good social manners.

Not knowing which side I should support, I quietly avert my gaze.

“Where are you two heading this Christmas day?”

“Is that something I must tell you, Kaburagi?”

“Well, it’s something I want to know. I like Makoto too so I have a right to ask, right?”

In a way, I’m kind of envious that he can convey his good will so naturally.

It embarrasses me, who’s been worrying irresolutely. I don’t really want to follow his example though.

Soutarou’s clearly upset despite his smile. He’s releasing a pitch black aura while smiling sweetly. His irritation might have grown at not being able to find words to reply to Ichigo-chan’s cut and dried statement.

Honestly, it’s bothersome and scary to enter the fight of such a fierce dog and wolf. However, I can’t ignore it when the cause of the fight is me. I give a huge sigh and enter the space between them.Translator: nakimushitl

“Ichigo-chan.”

“What, Makoto.”

“Sorry for today. Soutarou and I have an arrangement to hang out today so it’s about time we go. I’ll hang out with you next time, Ichigo-chan. Contact me.”

I grab Soutarou’s arm and tug.

“It can’t be helped since you say so, Makoto. … In exchange”

After scratching his head with his right hand, Ichigo-chan grabs my arm with his left hand and pulls strongly.

“You can kiss me. Face here, Makoto.”

“Oi, don’t mess around.”

Ichigo-chan’s right hand covers my cheek. His hand is cold. That hand caresses me, from cheek to neck, and to my shoulder.

The instance his palm touches the back of my head, I strike Ichigo-chan’s shoulder in resistance. However, he doesn’t even flinch. I’m fundamentally a literature boy. Although I can play sports with no issues, I’m after all a weak male who didn’t join a club or do any special exercise.

Tug, he pulls my face close. Ah, this is the pattern where I’m going to get kissed. I strangely thought in a corner of my cool head. Honestly, I don’t have any special feelings about kisses so I’m thinking it doesn’t really matter if Ichigo-chan takes my first kiss. However, what pricks my heart is that Soutarou is watching. Although a mere kiss doesn’t bother me, Soutarou getting sad from seeing Ichigo-chan and I kiss makes me want to cry a little, just a little.

“Mako…!”Translator: nakimushitl

See, Soutarou’s voice sounds so tearful.

What if my position is switched with Soutarou here, and I’ve to watch Soutarou kiss someone else? I wonder how I’ll feel.

Soutarou hugging someone tightly, and placing a hand on her cheek. A smile like melting marshmallows, calling her name with a voice sweet like honey. And with an imbalanced pretty yet manly doggy-like smile that will cause one to lose their sight, he gives a faint kiss to someone other than me. If that happens.

What will I think, me?

Although I won’t be extremely jealous of that person, I certainly won’t feel good. I’ll feel like I was left behind and may be slightly sad.

“Wait wait wait. Alright, distance yourself, distance yourself. Please don’t touch the actor.[3]”

I guard against Ichigo-chan’s lips with my IC card case.

“Ain’t just a kiss okay? Or is it your first? Being emotionally attached to your first is just like a girl, sheesh.”

I am a girl, I suppress my feelings of wanting to say that, and give a small sigh.

Translator: nakimushitl

“It’s not like I have special emotional attachments for the first. But don’t start copulating in a place like this.”

“It’s a given to want to do it when ya see the face of someone ya like. I’m not like a certain tamed dog. I want to kiss the person I like anywhere, and do more if there’s a chance. I ain’t got any intentions of being obediently bound as friends. Hurry up and like me, Makoto.”

It’s his usual light and entreating complaint. However, did I see wrong? He seems a little sad.

I came to think this way because of what Subaru said.

――… it takes a lot more courage than you think to tell someone your feelings. Just saying a single “Like” is so embarrassing that it makes one want to cry.

I thought that everyone was saying light words with light feelings, that they were doing and saying such things as part of teasing me, but it wasn’t like that. It wasn’t. They were properly thinking to convey their feelings to me, bit by bit sharing the feelings born in their hearts with me.

They weren’t light words at all. They were incredibly heavy.

Translator: nakimushitl

“… … Sorry, I”

Sorry, I. What was I going to say after that?

Losing the words that were placed on my marginally opened lips, my lips tremble.

I don’t know. I don’t know, at all. 1 plus 1 doesn’t become 3. However, I must find a way for it to become 3. Unable to find an answer, I simply stared at the pure white paper.

“… Makoto.”

I raise my head at Ichigo-chan’s voice. At this point, Ichigo-chan’s face is already right before mine. I lose my wits from surprise but the one thing I understand is something soft and squishy touched my neck. Subsequently, as though he forgot just now, comes a pricking pain. Feels like he left a mark, huh.

“――…?! Sheesh, you really…”

“You just have to slowly get used to it? The next will be on the lips.”

“That’s not the problem! Gosh, it just got a little serious so the heck is up with this?”

Translator: nakimushitl

The serious development flipped into a serial development thanks to Ichigo-chan who said unbelievable things nonchalantly.

At that moment, a shock strong enough that that serial turns to serious appears. Soutarou firmly grabs my arm, tugs it strongly and hides me behind him, then grabs Ichigo-chan’s collar.

“… What? Makoto ain’t yours. You’re friends, right? What’s with your oozing desire to monopolise.”

Soutarou bites his lip fiercely as though he wants to bite it off. Then, with a wrinkle between his brows, he glares at Ichigo-chan with a murderous glint in his eye.

“Vexed? Hurry and get on the same arena as us then. Ya the biggest coward for clinging onto the position of a friend for so long.”

Translator: nakimushitl

“I know something like that without you telling me. I like Makoto enough that I’d use such cowardly methods to stay closest to him. This feeling doesn’t lose to even yours. By far.”

“Hm, … really…”

Why am I being confessed to so naturally here?!

I didn’t think I’ll be pressed to make a decision at this point in December. Even though it was yesterday that I made a loose decision “I’ll experience love too tehepero~”, I didn’t think I’ll be dragged onto the arena of love in just a day.

“Dat face your real one? Ain’t angelic at all. Where did the sparkles behind ya go? Ain’t ya too anxious when it seems like Makoto’s gonna get taken?”

“Haha, taken? What a joke. If Makoto’s mine, it doesn’t matter who it is or where they come from, I’ll definitely not let go. I’ll even work myself to death to have Makoto like me. That’s why it’s impossible for Makoto to be someone else’s. Not if I obtain him.”

Eh…? May I ask where my sly doggy with an angel attribute went?

The me whose head turned completely blank, simply stood still behind Soutarou.

[1] Alluding to R18 scenes.

[2] ゲロイン (Geroin), a female character with a vomit scene.

[3] A joke to lighten the mood? Like a security guard stopping a fan.