He Jin, who had always perceived himself as a strong person, never expected himself to act like a girl, who cried over a man again and again.
He bit his lip hid inside his blanket and curled himself up, just like someone who had already quit drugs for three years, and now getting addicted to drugs again. His body that had become thirsty for too long had now tasted honey again, and adrenaline was rushing through his brain and his limbs, relieving him temporarily from the pain.
This indulgence and self-deprivation had made all the previous endurance of the past three years in vain. After having it for the first time, he was looking forward to the second time, then thirdâŠevery time he wanted to go deeper without having to return to the realityâŠ
He Jin hugged himself, although he was crying, it was no longer a cry of despair, itâs more like tears of happiness. He was imagining Qin Yang holding him and heâs immersed in his own imagination. He called Qin Yangâs name over and over again without letting go.
When he returned to work on Monday, He Jin went to the hospital to get some anti-inflammatory drugs while he was on his noon break. When he was on the way, He Jin looked back from time to time, as he always felt like somebody was following him. However, after turning back, he saw no one, and he hadnât seen anyone acting strangely either.
When he was back to his company, He Jin took some medicine and he was going to take a nap.
From the second year of work onwards, He Jin apparently felt that he had become much weaker than before. When he was still studying, he was feeling energetic all day along. Now, he had to take a nap in the afternoon, or heâd feel completely exhausted at work. What made it worse? Heâs even having a low fever and completely powerless.
After the message that said âyesâ the previous night, Qin Yang didnât send him any more messages, and He Jin didnât reply either.
The two seemed to have kept this weird pace and none of them took a step forward. They seemed to be able to continue with their lives just like that.
He Jin didnât dare to keep Qin Yangâs number. Sometimes, he would just check those few messages that he chose to keep. However, he had already remembered the unfamiliar telephone number, and he could even tell it in reverse order.
In the evening, Qin Yang received the information collected by Xiao Zhou.
âMr. He is working in xx company. He leaves at 7:45am and arrives in the office at about 8:20am. He went to the central hospital in District xx at noon, since heâs having a cold, he had to go to the emergency department to get some anti-inflammatory medicine. At 5pm, he left the office on time and heâs already at home now.â
Having a cold? Qin Yang frowned; it shouldnât be a cold. Theyâd probably done it too vigorously that day and thereâs now a wound, and thatâs why heâs having a fever.
He turned on his bracelet and switched to the interface of messages with He Jin, and he was going to send him a message to ask how heâs feeling. However, when he started typing the word âyouâ, Qin Yang was feeling pissed and he deleted it.
After He Jin knew that it was Qin Yang after all, he hadnât replied at all. And thereâs no way for Qin Yang to continue reaching out for He Jin proactively. Why should he, after three years, still look so enthusiastic in reaching out He Jin when he couldnât care less? Why shouldnât it be He Jin who did so?
Qin Yang asked Xiao Zhou, âwhat about his relationship? Anything new with it?â
Xiao Zhou, âIâm in touch with a local investigative agency, and I will only get the info tomorrow.â
Qin Yang took his bracelet back. He thought that sooner or later He Jin would belong to him again, thereâs no need to get anxious now.
On Wednesday, He Jinâs body was in a much better shape. When he was having dinner at night, Mother He hesitated for a long time before finally breaking the silence and asked, âlast time, the girl told me that she has a good impression of you, but youâre a guy, you have to be more proactive, donât make a girl say it first.â
After mother He said this, He Jin suddenly recalled about it. He reacted calmly, âoh, I was about to treat her for dinner. Iâll ask her if sheâs free tomorrow night. She told me that she gets off work at 5:30pm, about the same time as I do.â
Mother He nodded straightly, âokay, okay, just find a chance to see each other more! Then I wonât prepare your dinner tomorrow.â
The corners of He Jinâs eyes twitched, ââŠeven so, might not be tomorrow.â
After having dinner, He Jin texted Duan Shurong, who agreed to have dinner. When He Jin thought that he wasnât going to know Duan Shurong more, but to tell her firmly that itâs impossible between them, he suddenly felt guilty.
âHow is it going? Have you contacted her?â Mother He poured a glass of juice to He Jin and hurriedly asked.
He Jin nodded, âyes, then I wonât come back for dinner tomorrow.â
Mother He looked happy and she reminded him, âremember to send her home before coming back!â
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He Jin, ââŠâ Itâs weird. How come he felt like his mother had become a different person? He never saw his mother being serious to one of his blind dates.
Mother He was walking around the kitchen and living room. She seemed to be preparing something. After half an hour, she took two gift bags that looked nice, one had been given to them as a present, another was given to He Jin when his company was distributing milk to its staff.
âWell, take this tomorrow to the girl.â Mother He put the bag next to He Jin and she looked quite desperate.
He Jin was speechless, âMom, we are going toâŠweâre just going on a date, itâs not like Iâm going to her place. Why do you want me to bring this? Itâs so heavy!â
Mother He rubbed her hands and seemed to be looking for something to give away. Then, she said, âarenât you going to send her home tomorrow? What if she invites you in? You have to bring something; it doesnât look nice when you walk in empty-handed.â