There is no sense of time. How much time has passed, I donāt even know.
I touched the ring that Allen had given me and the hair ornament that Her majesty had given me to calm my mind and believe that we would meet again.
But, when bread and water, the only things that are occasionally offered, the words they say pierces my heart.
āYour father is dead. He protested against your abduction to the crown, so it seems they executed your whole family as traitors.ā
ā¦ā¦Itās a lie. There is no way that can happen.
āThe war has started because you refused to marry. If you had done your duty as a noblewoman, your people and your soldiers wouldnāt have died. Now, Bruseni is almost under the control of the Empire.ā (Tl:- in their dreams.)
ā¦ā¦I put myself later for my people. But theyā¦.
āOh, by the way, I heard the man you love has died in the war? It seems he got stabbed in the stomach with a spear.ā
āThat!ā
No! Itās a lie! Thereās no way that Allen will end up that way.
āIf you hadnāt been in his life, that man wouldnāt have died. Oh, poor soul.ā
Itās a lie! Itās a lie! Itās a lie!
āItās your fault, isnāt it? If it werenāt for you, that man would still be alive and living happily ever after.ā
Allen? Itāsā¦.. a lie, isnāt it? Allen?
āAhhā
Allenā¦ā¦.
Since then, that guy has not come to tell me anything.
Allenā¦ā¦.
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How much time has passed now?
Itās still pitch black. But I feel like thereās someone out there.
Is that ā¦.Allen?
āAllen?ā
I thought I saw Allenās face there, but it quickly disappeared.
āHey. Allen? Donāt go. Hey, didnāt you come to protect me? Hey, Allen?ā
But my voice only echoes in the darkness.
Thatās right. There was no way Allen could be at the center of such an enemy nation.
This is a hallucination.
I touched the precious ring on my left ring finger and thought of Allen.
āHey, Allen?ā
No one, nothing, answers.
Iāmā¦.aloneā¦
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~Gatan~
It seems bread and water were put in.
I grabble and touched the usual place.
However, what touched my hand was not the usual bread or cup but a hard stick-like object.
āWhat? What is this?ā
At that moment, something flowed into me.
I was so startled that I hurriedly tried to take my hand away, but my right hand was sucked onto the stick so tightly that I couldnāt get it off!
The next thing I know, itās cold, lonely, and Iām not needed by anyone.
For some reason, such feelings spring up.
No! I have a family! And above all! Allen!
But at a time like this, what they said comes back to me.
Your father, your mother, and your brother were executed.
Allen was stabbed in the stomach with a spear and died in battle.
For some reason, the scene came to my mind as a real image, and I desperately denied that it was wrong.
But it kept coming back to me, and the bad images that popped into my head kept growing and growing.
Iā¦.alreadyā¦.from anyoneā¦?
āAh ⦠wrong⦠Iā¦Iā¦ā
I touch my hair ornament with my free left hand and prayed to my precious ring to reject the bad image.
But despite my desperate efforts to resist, my consciousness was slowly being consumed by fear, little by little, until it was filled in.