CHAPTER 34: I WANTED TO BE ALONEāBUT IāM NOT ALONE
āMagic Arrowā¦ā
āGube!ā
The Magic Arrow I shot blew away a lizardman.
When I looked the other way, I saw knights fighting with lizardmen. Multiple knights surrounded the lizardmen and swung their swords at them.
The knights would never take on the lizardmen one-on-one; that was the ironclad rule which the captain drilled into everyone until we arrived at the battlefield.
āā¦Iāve known since the first damn day alreadyā¦ā
A grunt soldier muttered to himself.
When I observed the lizardmen fighting, they were definitely way stronger than usual⦠It was my first time seeing a lizardman in the flesh, but were they really that powerful of a creature?
Their attacks were indiscriminate and swift.
A fully-armored male knight who received a single hit from a lizardman was sent flying straight backward for a couple of meters with a crash. The impact mustāve been tremendous; unable to immediately recover from the blow, the soldier tottered around.
Firvus answered my doubts.
āDid you forget? Carlyle said they got a Crest Master working in the shadows for them, and the lizardmen who have tattoos engraved onto them evolve as an individual.ā
ā¦Thatās right. We talked about that.
Then, when I looked at the lizardmen, I saw tattoos with various designs engraved all over the their bodies.
āIf we were to take them directly, even the kingdom knights wouldnāt be a match for their strength.ā
āIs that so?ā
I caught a new lizardman at the corner of my eye.
āMagic Arrowā¦ā
A white arrow pierced through the lizardmanās chest and ended his life with a single shot.
āā¦Seems like itās irrelevant to youā¦ā
Firvus spoke with an exasperated face.
At any rate, it seems like the lizardmen only need one shot of my slightly powerful Magic Arrow.
However, I felt something of out place.
How should I put it⦠It felt like the sharpness and firing time compared to my usual Magic Arrow was worse. I was actually missing a lot of my targets.
Itās probably just my imagination.
After routing the lizardmen in the area, our squad began advancing once more.
Just then, I heard the grumbling of some knights.
āā¦Arenāt these lizards stronger than before?ā
āI thought the same. I feel like weāre advancing less than before.ā
āArenāt like the number of tattoos higher than the previous guys?ā
ā¦I wondered what they meant by that.
After walking for a while, the captainās loud voice resounded.
āWeāll take our midday break here! Eat your food while you can! Also, the soldiers on guard duty should do best to keep their eyes on the surroundings!ā
Looks like weāre entering break-time.
āIāll go rest over there.ā
After informing Firvus, I moved over to a place without many people.
I wanted to be alone.
Ever since the night I reunited with Alencia, my feelings have been thrown out of order. I still havenāt processed the emotions I felt at that moment.
My heart is losing stability.
I couldnāt bring myself to talk to another person with a smile.
And yetā
Rustle.
āI heard someoneās footsteps.
I, who was nibbling at my rationed bread, quickly shifted my gaze.
āUm, Albert⦠Would you like to eat togetherā¦?ā
There stood Laura.
āā¦ā
I was unable to respond immediately.
I want to be alone.
However, Iād feel bad about hurling those words at her.
Laura timidly continued to speak.
āā¦Um, erm⦠I know Iām being a bother⦠since, um⦠youāre giving off the impression⦠that you wanna be aloneā¦ā
Then, Laura raised the tone of her voice.
āBut! Thatās exactly why! I want to lend you an ear! I want you to tell me what happened if youāre troubled! Iām⦠worried for you as your friend!ā
Laura was excessively frantic.
After seeing her face, Iā
āHaha, hahahahaha!ā
āended up laughing.
For some odd reason, Laura was earnestly thinking about me.
Thinking aboutĀ me.
Thinking about the likes ofĀ me.
Thinking about a completely worthless person likeĀ me.
Even if I put up an unapproachable wall, she climbs over it and tells me sheās worried for me.
I have someone like that beside me.
There was nothing more delightful and happy than this.
I wanted to be aloneā
but Iām not alone.
āHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!ā
āJeez! Whatās so funny, Albert!?ā
āSorry, sorry. You looked so serious, so I thought it was funny.ā
āBut! I was really worried about you! You looked really down, soā¦!ā
So thatās it. Laura was concerned for me.
I made her worry for me, huhā¦
āLaura.ā
āYes?ā
āThank you for worrying for me.ā
I pointed at the spot next to me with my hand.
āLetās eat together.ā
āYes!ā
Lauraās face lit up with happiness, and she nodded.
We then chatted about trivial things. We didnāt talk about anything specific. Stuff about the academy, stuff about magicāthe same old things we talked about at the cafeteria.
That was probably Lauraās way of looking out for me.
She should be curious about what I was depressed about.
However, she never mentioned it.
She made trivial small talk without bringing it up, all to divert my attention from it.
Precisely because of that, I had a thought.
I wanted to tell Laura the truth.
If I talked to someone about it, maybe the weight in my chest would lighten up a little.
I thought this was the perfect time to bring it up.
Despite Laura telling me about her own lineage, I still kept mines a secret. I needed to correct this unfairness.
āLaura.ā
āYes?ā
In response to my solemn voice, Laura tilted her head with a puzzled expression.
āI want you to hear my story.ā
She was clever, so she guessed everything I wanted to say with just those words.
āYes! Of course!ā
A brief silence.
Laura waited for me to speak.
I waited for the words to float to my chestāthe words I needed to tell Laura, and the past I shut away inside myself.
Before long, the words would slowly spill from my mouthā
as if a heavy gate was being pushed open.
āā¦Laura⦠You see, I⦠was enrolled in the academy ten years ago. I was a student who ran away in fear of failing.ā