âHey Takasu, Amiâs got a motorcycle and she told me to go shopping. While the girls are cleaning up, if you sit on the back, then weâŠâ
ââŠHm?â
Watching RyĆ«ji as he looked up, Kitamuraâs handsome glasses-clad face stiffened momentarily.
In RyĆ«jiâs right hand was the âTakasu stickâ. In his left was a spray bottle of cleaner. At his waist was a dry rag, and beside him, he had a bucket and a wet rag. RyĆ«ji was wearing rubber gloves and on all fours while in the middle of intensely polishing the bottom of the foreign-made sink in perfect form, as if he were at home.
Getting off his hands so he could reply to Kitamura properly, he removed his gloves,
âWhat was that? What did you say just now?â
âAh, no⊠never mind. So youâre still⊠Youâre really into this cleaning, arenât ya?â
âAh, well, itâs something worth doing.â
Sighing, Ryƫji knelt on the floor Japanese-style as he took another glance around the area. His bloodshot eyes glinting dangerously, and ferociously licked his lips, but that was only because his lips were dry.
The villa was even more wonderful than he had originally imagined. It was a two-story building. On the first floor, there was a living room that was easily over twenty in size and had a fireplace. Next to that was the dining room from which there was a clear view of the beach, and even the kitchen that was separated by a counter looked larger than six tatami mats and had a table. He had also heard that the second floor had five bedrooms. Furthermore, there were full bathrooms here and there on both floors.
âThat Ami, she told us the place was a 5LDK, but⊠this is ridiculous; the living room alone is probably bigger than my house.â
âAmiâs house when she was living in my neighborhood was even bigger than this place and I bet her apartment in the city is even more so⊠I canât even wrap my mind around it. How should I put it⊠I guess you could say sheâs an elite.â
âAn elite, huhâŠâ
Bringing their hands to their faces like old ladies, the two guys somehow ended up gazing towards the high ceiling. Like in the houses that appeared on foreign dramas, a fan was spinning round and round above their heads. It really felt like they were in another world⊠Neither Ryƫji nor Kitamura could figure out what purpose the fan served. They were unconsciously sighing and acting rather absentminded when,
âOkay YĆ«saku, hereâs the key. So? Is Takasu-kun goingăshopping with you?â
The elite had suddenly popped her head in through the doorway. Wondering , only Ryƫji was confused by the question.
âAh no, it looks like Takasuâs in the middle of a cleaning fit, so Iâm going by myself.â
âEhh? That wonât work. Thereâs no basket attached and itâs not a scooter so you canât put stuff at your feet. Are you planning on tying it all down with cord? Because we donât even have any, so unless thereâs someone to carry the stuff, Iâm telling you itâs impossible.â
âWell then, will you go?â
âIf Iâm not here, then there wonât be anyone left whoâs familiar with this villa, right?â
⊠Finally catching up with the situation, Ryƫji raised his hand to offer his suggestion.
âTake Taiga. That girl canât clean anyway, so even if she stayed behind, she wouldnât be any help. He~y, Taiga~!â
âWhat, whatâs with the shouting?!â
âWhoa!â
He was surprised. Taiga had been surprisingly close by.
She might have been cleaning the floor, or maybe she had just been sitting there, or perhaps she had sensed Kitamuraâs presence and was stealthily making her way closer. Whatever the reason, she was on all fours, looking out with her head protruding from between Amiâs long legs.
âWhat the heck you?! Donât poke your head in weird places!â
Disregarding Amiâs yelling and acting like a regular customer poking her face into a shop to ask, âYou still open?â, Taiga held onto the back of Amiâs knees and stared only at RyĆ«ji, making sure not to look towards Kitamura.
âHey, we need someone to go shopping with Kitamura, so I was thinking you could go.â
Following up RyĆ«jiâs suggestion, Kitamura held the keys he had gotten from Ami near his face and jingled them.
âHow about it, wonât you go with me? You know that mountain we walked down earlier, I bet itâll feel pretty nice to ride up it on a motorcycle.â
ââŠ~!â
Suddenly stiffening up, Taiga pursed her lips into a small triangle. Her round face tinged pink and her eyes narrowed, turning in on themselves. It was the expression Taiga would show when she was nervous or afraid. RyĆ«ji nodded to himself. Riding along with Kitamura on a seaside tour⊠She probably hadnât even imagined of a situation like that, even in her dreams. What a nice assist. By happenstance, he had ended up helping Taiga after all. But oh well, since it just turned out like this coincidentally, there was noâŠ
âI, I wonât go.â
âWhat?!â
RyĆ«ji, who had been inebriated by his own goodwill, unthinkingly turned around looking like a demon. It wasnât that he was mad, but rather, he was just surprised. A good assist, a good chance, why hadnât she taken advantage of it?
Unaware of what RyĆ«ji was thinking, Taiga pressed her face against the back of Amiâs knees and nervously hid her face like the elder daughter of a poor family watching her younger brother who was aiming to join the Giants and her slightly paranoid father from behind a tree,
<b>(!)</b>
âIâm scared of motorcycles, soâŠI wonât go.â
ââŠHey what are youâŠâ
Perhaps unconsciously, she had been rubbing Amiâs behind. Running away from Ami who had shifted herself in annoyance, she now stood near the wall, fidgeting,
âI bet Minorin will go, so Iâll go get her.â
Calling out âMi~no~ri~n~â, she ended up escaping down the hall.
Not only did she just discard her own opportunity, did she now plan on doing the same with his chance to talk with Minori? Ryƫji thought, and quickly got to his feet and chased after Taiga. Catching her by the elbow and pulling her back,
âWait a second you! What the heck are you thinking?!â
He made sure to speak quietly enough that Kitamura and Ami wouldnât be able to hear them from the kitchen as he started questioning her, but,
ââŠShut up.â
âGuh!â
She elbowed Ryƫji sharply in the gut, making him unable to speak as he fell to his knees. Taiga looked down on him with an extremely icy glare, like a frozen corpse of a saber-toothed tiger found in the deepest reaches of the ice after thousands of years,
âIâve got an idea. Unlike you, I work in an organized and logical manner.â
ââŠEven though you were just too shy. I saw the wholeâŠOo!â
ââŠA mosquito. There was a mosquito, yâknow.â
After taking that slap to the mouth, he couldnât ask any more questions.
âShopping? Iâll go, Iâll go!ââŠAfter volunteering, Minori carelessly tossed her mop aside and hopped on the motorcycle, and departed for the station-front supermarket together with Kitamura. She was yelling out something like, âLetâs fly like the wind!â as they drove off.
Near the entryway on the wooden deck where they had just seen the two off, Taiga said in a low voice,
âGot it? From now until the time Minorin gets back, weâre going to look for a place where we can pull off our prearranged plan. Like for example, in the attic or climbing up to the window of Minorinâs room from outside. Search out all the places in this villa that can be used to hide, places to surprise Minorin. Since youâre a dog, it should be easy for you.â
Pretending he didnât hear the extraneous bad-mouthing, RyĆ«ji nodded.
ââŠOkay, I got it. But, itâll be troublesome if weâre seen by Ami. Now that I think about it, just where did she go?â
When he realized Ami wasnât there anymore, he looked around but saw no sign of her. Taiga just âHmphedâ and shrugged,
âDunno. Anyway, if she catches us, then weâll just have to make sure she doesnât figure out what weâre doing.â
She prodded RyĆ«ji from behind as if to tell him to hurry up. Considering that she had declared herself âorganized and logicalâ, what she had said just now was rather haphazard, but it wasnât like there was really any other way to do it. With her pushing him along, they went back inside,
âYou, go check out the second floor. Starting with the room closest to the stairs, it goes Kitamuraâs, yours, mine, Minorinâs, and then the stupid Chihuahuaâs. Earlier, that idiot said she was changing the sheets or something.â
âGot it. So youâve got the first floor. There are cockroaches, so be careful.â
âEhâŠ?â
Leaving behind Taiga, who was making a complicated expression, Ryƫji ascended the stairs to the second floor.
Walking carelessly along the broad wooden floor, he was astounded by the wide hallway and the doors to the bedrooms that lined the south side. He got the feeling that they had been much more carefully constructed than those of some pitiful pension or petit hotel.
What with Taigaâs place and Amiâs house, there seemed to be an awful lot of rich people in the world⊠While thinking about his own relatively snug house, RyĆ«ji stepped lightly and peeked into Minoriâs room. He was supposed to sneak inside and check whether or not it would be possible to rap on the window from the outside. If time permitted, they even planned on climbing into the attic.
Basically, Taiga and RyĆ«ji were going to give Minori quite a fright. Of course he thought it was pathetic, but if they didnât make sure to scare her today and tomorrow, then the knight making his appearance the following evening wouldnât be very effective at all. And then, theyâd be stuck with no way to escape that future with all the prostrating and puppies. It really was incredibly egotistical, but when it comes to unrequited love, people are nothing if not egotistical. In the first place, they would come up with all sorts of fantasies on their own as well as convenient misunderstandings⊠Well, even if he tried to defend his actions, his feelings of guilt werenât going to just conveniently go away.
He was aware that entering her room like this was kind of stalker-like. But, he was pretty sure she hadnât unpacked yet and he wasnât going to be touching her stuff, so it wouldnât really be a big deal⊠Debating with himself, he made his way down the hall when,
ââŠHuh? Whatâs this here?â
Opposite all the bedroom doors on the south side stood two unidentified doors along the stairs. RyĆ«ji tried opening one of them carefully, but then he just shrugged his shoulders. He hadnât checked before, but it was just a bathroom. , pointing at the toilet, RyĆ«ji thus delayed its sentence.
, opening the door, he decided to take a peek.
âHm?âŠGeez, what the heck?â
He hadnât turned on the light, but the changing area plus washing machine room was brightly lit. It wasnât like RyĆ«ji would be responsible for the utilities cost, but he wasnât the kind of guy who would allow such frivolous waste. However, although he wanted to turn off the light, he had no idea where the switch was. It was probably somewhere beyond the partially opened sliding glass door. He stepped inside and looked around. He saw a sink and a bathtub that was surrounded by a shower curtain. There was a switch on the wall next to the glass door.
he thought for a moment. It seemed kind of damp for some reason⊠, rationalizing away his feeling of unease, and went ahead and flipped off the light switch.
âKyah?!â
âOh sorry!⊠Huh?â
A girl had screamed. Reflexively switching the light back on, RyĆ«ji tilted his head. Just whoâŠ
âOh geez, so itâs you, Takasu-kun? Would you mind not entering the girlsâ bath?â
âŠOn the other side of the shower curtain.
âŠThe sound of the faucet being turned, the sound of the dripping shower.
âŠThe hanging moisture.
âŠThat voice, it belonged to Ami.
Ah.
âA, s, s, s, sorry~! I didnât notice⊠Ah~!â
ââŠHm, fufuâŠâ
From the other side of the closed shower curtain, a white arm suddenly extended outwards. Desperately turning away, he tried to escape, but that wet hand somehow retained a tight grip on RyĆ«jiâs arm. Pulled with unbelievable force, RyĆ«ji futilely struggled by grabbing at the tiles in an attempt to get away.
âWha, wha, what the heck are you doingâŠ~?!â
âHe~ey,â
Amiâs voice was just like a kittenâs as it shrilly saturated the shower room.
âTakasu-kun, youâre quite bold, arenât you? I had no idea⊠So you came, to fulfill your desire?â
âItâs not like that! I didnât come here on purpose! I just didnât notice!â
âCome now⊠Thereâs no need for excuses, is there? No oneâs around to see⊠Itâs just the two of us, all aloneâŠâ
âAre you stupid?!â
From within the curtained shower, there came a stifled laughter. Ami was just like a demon. With Ryƫji firmly ensnared in her trap, her murmuring voice continued to echo as if it were a paralysis incantation.
âArenât you gladâŠ? Iâll keep this a secret from everybody⊠From YĆ«saku and the jealous tigerâŠ. Even Minori-chan, itâll be a secretâŠâ
âFwah!â
The curtain swayed. Through the thin fabric, he could see her silhouette slowly stand up. , Ryƫji was practically on the verge of death as he desperately covered his eyes with one arm in wild confusion.
âW, w, what are you thinking, you?!â
âItâs fine⊠If itâs what Takasu-kun wantsâŠâ
âI donât want it, I donât!â
âReally?⊠Hey, are you serious?⊠You really, donât want itâŠ?â
âWant what?!â
ââŠThis!â
âKyaaaa~h~!â
ââŠAh?â
Ryƫji had desperately averted his gaze from the suddenly flung open curtain, turning his whole face away as he had voicelessly screamed and fell on his backside, and looking down on him,
ââŠPufu~!â
Puffing up her cheeks, the demon started laughing hysterically. So then,
âKyahahahahahahahahaha~!â
Laughing boisterously at the idiot who was stuck on the ground sitting with his legs outstretched, she sounded like a machine gun as she mercilessly pelted him with ridicule.
ââŠWh, wâŠhuh?â
Standing in the bathtub that was coated in bubbles, Amiâs body contorted as she cackled evilly. Dancing joyfully and gleefully with tears forming in her eyes, she pointed at the pitiful-looking RyĆ«ji and writhed in laughter,
âOh~ man~! Ta~ ka~ su~ ku~ n?! I wonder, just what were you expecting?! Look at your face⊠Kyahahaha! Hee, how funny~! Itâs too much~! Ahahahaha!â
Wearing a t-shirt and jeans and holding a sponge in one hand, Ami seemed to be enjoying herself as she pounded the wall repeatedly.
âYouâŠJ, just what were you doingâŠ?â
âClean, ing, the, tub . Since RyĆ«ji loves cleaning so much, I suppose I could let you take my place if you want~â
âAh, RyĆ«ji! How was the second floor? I found the ladder that leads to the attic⊠What is it?â
Practically catatonic with shock, mortification, and embarrassment, he had fled down the stairs, and after running into Taiga on the stair landing, he started trying to communicate by frantically gesturing with his whole body to tell her about what Ami had perpetrated against him. With his wild eyes rather teary and bloodshot, he was relatively certain that if he had approached anyone other than Taiga, he would have been arrested, indicted, convicted, and then put to work.
âEhh? FufuâŠthat stupid Chihuahua did? Just like that? She acted like she was showering? YouâŠwere teased? RyĆ«ji was? So she pretended to be naked and tried seducing you?â
How he managed to get his point across so well was a mystery even to himself, but while pinching his earlobe, Ryƫji firmly nodded to tell her she was spot on.
ââŠAnyway, how did the rest of the plan go? Did you make sure to check out Minorinâs room properly?â
He thoroughly shook his head side to side.
âSo useless!â
At Taigaâs instantaneous and extreme beratement, the ever-delicate RyĆ«ji retreated sadly against the wall, subconsciously bringing his hand to the cell phone in his back pocket⊠If he called home now, maybe Yasuko would pick up and let him talk with Inko-chanâŠ
âDonât go looking for comfort! What a seriously useless guy, how could you let yourself be made fun of by that stupid Chihuahua?! Geez, fine, I get it. Iâll go check the room out for myself, and while Iâm at it, Iâll have a word with that dumb girl.â
He didnât know whether or not just a word would be sufficient, but right now, RyĆ«ji felt like leaving everything to Taiga. Pathetic? He didnât care. RyĆ«jiâs pride and chivalry had already been cruelly decimated.
Ascending the stairs with a decidedly sharp expression on her face, Taiga shouted, âHey! Bakachi~!â quite loudly. To RyĆ«ji who was waiting on the ground floor, it sounded very promising.
Next, he heard the sound of the sliding door being opened, followed by a shriek, then there seemed to be some sort of scuffle, and finallyâŠsilence.
For a while, that unpleasant silence lingered on, and wondering if something might have happened, Ryƫji started to get worried when,
ââŠI, I canât believe you, geez, what the heck were you thinking, seriouslyâŠâ
Complaining profusely as she descended the stairs, Ami appeared. Looking sweatier than before and perhaps irritated, she practically shoved Ryƫji aside from his place at the bottom of the stairs, a sweet scent wafting from her wet hair at the same time.
âŠWet hair?
And then there was Taiga who had come down afterwards,
âW, what happened?!â
For some reason her whole body was lightly shaking, and on top of that, there on her face she had a red mark that was distinctively hand-shaped. Like a cat that had been run over by a car, her expression remained frozen and totally wide-eyed, and then,
ââŠThe stupid Chihuahua, was really taking a bathâŠâ
She said.
âYou donât need to say any more than that!â
As Ami turned around snappingly, RyĆ«ji wondered what had happened between the two of them, but it was too difficult for him to ask. There was only one thing he was sure of â Taiga was now cross-eyed.
âTa, TaigaâŠ? Pull yourself together, just what did you end up seeing?â
âRyĆ«ji, you knowâŠabout Bakachi, itâs like poof!â
Poofing open her right hand near her right breast,
âLike, poof!â
And poofing open her left hand near her left breast, Taiga then finally brought her hands down to the lower half of her body, balling them up and then exaggeratedly flinging them both open again.
ââŠ~Poof~!⊠You know.â
Ami jumped, practically flying through the air towards them,
âI said stop that already!â
She landed a chop to Taigaâs head. Of course, under normal circumstances this wasnât something the Palmtop Tiger would just let slide, but Taiga was rather out of it, tottering over to the phone stand and picking up a pad of paper and a pencil,
âRyĆ«ji, you knowâŠabout Bakachi, right here itâs like this⊠And surprisingly, this is like that⊠Here itâs like, poof~!â
âDonât go around drawing other peopleâs naked bodies!â
The picture, which was oddly realistic because of, rather than in spite of the fact it sucked so bad, was taken away and ripped apart.
After that, it was a good thirty minutes or so before Taiga turned back to normal.
* * *
It was probably about an hour later. Shortly after he heard the sound of a motorcycle braking outside,
âWeâre back~! He~y, Takasu-ku~n!â
Ryƫji looked up from polishing the silverware like a faithful dog. Just now, Minori had definitely called out to him.
When he ran down the long hallway in slippers and got to the entranceway through which she had called,
âSorry sorry, but could you help me carry this stuff?â
âWoah, you guys really bought a lot, didnât you?!â
âI guess so, but we need enough for the five of us for dinner tonight, three meals tomorrow, and maybe even breakfast the day after tomorrow. And then thereâs Oolong tea and seasoning and other things.â
âWe canât leave any stuff behind though.â
âItâll be fine as long as we eat everything. Ooh.â
What Minori was dragging along the wood deck towards the entranceway were four large shopping bags full of food. Hearing the clink of something fragile hitting the ground, RyĆ«ji rushed to take the bags off Minoriâs hands.
âDonât drag them. Geez, what the heck is Kitamura doing?â
âHeâs putting away the bike. Sorry, Iâll carry this one. So what are Taiga and Amin up to?â
âKawashima was watching television, but she went ballistic over how bad the reception was, so now sheâs on the phone with her parents. Taiga isâŠpossibly in the bathroom. Anyway, letâs take all this to the kitchen.â
With Minori nodding in agreement, he was partly happy and partly embarrassed, since it felt like they were newlyweds. ⊠To hide his slackening face, RyĆ«ji walked ahead as he carried the heavy baggage to the kitchen. However, he couldnât just let himself idly succumb to transient pleasure. It was okay though, because he definitely hadnât forgotten his primary goal.
Of course, everything was already prepared. After all, it wasnât like all Taiga did was peep into Amiâs bathroom. Confirming the minor creaking coming from above, RyĆ«ji calmly estimated the distanceâŠ
âAh, please put the food and stuff right there for now, would you? We have to separate the refrigerated items from the non-refrigerated ones.â
âO~kay~.â
He nonchalantly brought Minori to a halt before the kitchen entrance. Squatting in the hallway, Minori began rummaging through the bag.
âLetâs see⊠Sauce is kept at room temperature, right? This curry rouxâŠroom temperature, probably. What about you, onion, which are you?â
Kneeling opposite her, RyĆ«ji pretended to be digging around in another bag as he stared at Minoriâs remarkedly smooth down-turned face, noticing that the area where her shiny hair parted was somewhat reddened from being in the sun and her upper lip was thin and somewhat pouty. .
His throat had become dry due to nervousness, so he casually cleared it,
âKu, Kushieda. Does this go in the fridge? I wonder, maybe itâs written on here somewhere?â
âHm? Let me see it. UmmâŠâ
He handed the can of tomato puree (which obviously didnât need to go in the fridge) to Minori and got her to read the small print. As she read the words, her large shining eyes narrowed, and then,
ââŠEek?!â
She gave a sudden convulsive shriek.
âHm? Whatâs the matter?â
Looking up, Ryƫji tried acting surprised, but he sounded rather nonchalant as he asked her.
âN, n, nonono, nnâŠ.â
As if she had turned into Junji Inagawa, Minoriâs eyes were wide open, her face was stiff, and she kept turning about frantically, switching back and forth between looking at RyĆ«jiâs face and looking over her shoulder.
âN, nonono, juâŠjust now, something, behind me⊠It, it was, uwah⊠What is it?!â
She kept glancing about like she was searching for something, and forcefully pushing aside her bangs as if she wanted to say she couldnât believe her eyes, she looked at RyĆ«jiâs face one more time.
âMaybe it was your imagination, thereâs nothing there, you know?â
ââŠâ
âIs something wrong?â
ââŠNo⊠ItâsâŠnothing⊠I, think. Must have beenâŠmy mistake. Thatâs right⊠Yeah, that~ must~ be~ it~âŠâ
Singsongily trying to convince herself even while her face remained stiff, she went and smacked herself a bit before she lowered her gaze back down towards the can.
Behind her.
Once more. Just like before, the same thing was happening again. Of course Ryƫji saw what was going on.
A panel in the ceiling had been pushed aside, and hanging from the darkness on the other side of the gap, fresh seaweed that theyâd collected just moments ago from the beach descended towards the back of Minoriâs neck. The round, puffed up cluster of seaweed was on its way towards the back neckline of the defenseless Minoriâs hoodie. Finally, a limp end touched her skin. Naturally, the whole rig was âPowered by attic.â By the way, about the âpoofyâ ball of seaweed, âThis is the floating imitation ghost, Bakachi No. 1âłâŠor so Taiga had told him. It wasnât like he didnât think about putting a stop to the whole thing.
ââŠ~âŠâ
Minoriâs face froze in a grimace. Very, very slowly, she turned around. Of course, Bakachi No. 1 was safely recalled right away, leaving absolutely no trace behind.
âWhatâs the matter, Kushieda?â
⊠Even as he thought that, Ryƫji faced her straight on with a questioning expression. Minori rather confusedly pointed in the wrong direction, her eyes showing her utter bewilderment,
âJ, just now, Iâm sure, definitely, something touched me⊠It was like, slippery, or rather, slimy⊠It was just likeâŠseaweed? Kind ofâŠâ
ââŠA corpseâs hair thatâs like seaweed⊠Itâs like the story about the ghost who got wrapped up in seaweed and died⊠Was it a sea otter? Wrapped up in seaweed, it must be a sea otter, right? The corpse of a sea otter?⊠A sea otter whose pouch is jammed full of dead scallops?!â
, Ryƫji sighed. As expected of Minori, she had a limitless knack for taking something weird and blowing it insanely out of proportion. Before long, she was stiffly clenching her front teeth and trembling fearfully,
âI, itâs wetâŠthe spot where I was touched is wet! This smell isâŠâ
Sniff, after touching the residue left behind on her neck by the seaweed, Minori sniffed her hand,
âGyah~! I knew it, it smells like seaweeeeeed~!â
Total bullseye, in fact.
âH, hey!â
âItâs the sea otterâs corpse~! Itâs the stench of seaweeeeeed~~!â
Extending her arm as far out as possible like she had touched something nasty, Minori ended up running down the hall as if her life depended on it. For her to become that scared from something so trivial⊠Ryƫji almost felt like giving thanks to the heavens for such a blessing as he calmly watched her run off.
Then a bit later,
ââŠI kind of, feel guiltyâŠâ
Minoriâs footsteps had receded. Pushing the ceiling panel far aside, the one who peered out with her fair face was, of course, Taiga. The dust was making her nose run as she looked down at RyĆ«ji,
âYouâre going to go to hell for doing this, you know.â
Her words were like something an astrologist might say.
ââŠBut what about you, youâre the actual perpetrator.â
âYouâre the primary offender though. Anyway, letâs get rid of Bakachi No. 1. Do you think I can jump down from here?â
âSuch a reckless⊠Donât even think about it, itâs too dangerous.â
Saying âDonât worry, donât worryâ as she pushed the panel aside even more, Taigaâs face receded into the darkness, replaced soon after by her toes.
âUsing the ladder again to get down would be too troublesome.â
âHey, wait aâŠAre you serious? Donât fall, okay?â
âYeah right, Iâm not that much of a klutz.â
She was going to fall. Judging by her pattern of falling, it was almost a certainty.
Fully believing that, Ryƫji positioned himself directly below her as she prepared to drop down and held out his arms, ready and waiting to catch her if necessary. Swinging her bare feet as she looked down to estimate the distance to the floor, Taiga finally started to slowly slide the bottom half of her body through the opening in the ceiling when,
âUgh~âŠâ
⊠Before he even had a chance to ask, Taiga suddenly slipped, dropping a few dozen centimeters. Catching her by her bare feet in the nick of time, Ryƫji had kept her from falling all the way to the floor.
âU, u, ooh⊠This is probablyâŠbad⊠My hands are slipping!â
Taiga was precariously hanging on by the pits of her arms with no other support. As Taiga flailed her legs futilely, her voice was tinged with worry.
âAh, up, down, I probably canât make it either wayâŠâ
âNow look, I told you, didnât I?! Iâll hold onto you, so just go ahead and let go!â
âN, no way!â
âWhy not?!â
âI bet you youâre looking at my panties, you perverted dog! Trying to look at underwear even at a time like this, youâre unbelievable!â
âYouâre the one whoâs unbelievable! I didnât have even the âPâ from panties in mind!â
Although Ryƫji finally got a hold of her, Taiga was trying to kick him with her legs, smacking him in the face with her bare feet, and just when he was considering yanking her down,
âOoh! The seaweed ghost really did appear~~!â
âSeaweed spirit~? Whatâs that?â
âIt might have been Tetsuo Ishidateâs spirit~~!â
âEh~? Whoâs that~? One of Minori-chanâs relatives?â
âOr else it might have been a sea otter ghost~~!â
âSea otter gift~? That sounds rather cute, doesnât it~?â
RyĆ«jiâs face suddenly went pale. It wasnât that his extremely steepened sanpaku eyes were looking at the two incoming girls with thoughts of turning them into seaweed wraps or anything like that; rather, he looked the way he did because he was in such a frantic state that he could feel his heart wanting to leap out of his chest.
âUwah, oh nononononoâŠ!â
The two approaching were obviously Minori and Ami. Taiga, who probably heard them talking, started flailing her legs even more violently. She was desperately trying to make her way back up into the ceiling. Even while her flurry of stomps struck at his face, RyĆ«ji supported Taigaâs bare feet with both hands, desperately trying with all his might to push her back up to the attic. However,
âHurry uâŠDah~!â
In her frantic confusion, Taiga dropped her flashlight, which ended up hitting Ryƫji clean in the nose. Just as he collapsed in pain, Taiga managed to pull herself up into the attic and quickly put the ceiling panel back into place.
âEh~, so whereâs this spirit of Tetsu, hm? All I see is Takasu-kun sitting here⊠Actually, Takasu-kun, what are you doingâŠ?â
âHuh~, how weird~⊠Takasu-kun, whatâs wrong?â
âUm, itâs not reallyâŠâ
The moment he turned around to tell them it was nothing,
âGehhhhh~~?!â
Seemingly inhuman screams of terror echoed forth from both Minori and Ami simultaneously. Wondering what in the world they were going on about, Ryƫji unconcernedly brought his hand up to his still-hurting nose,
ââŠOh!â
He was shocked too when he felt a warm viscous fluid. Looking at his hand, he saw that it was stickily covered in deep red, the result of his heavy nosebleed. Maybe this was divine punishment for earlier⊠Although for the sake of correctness, what had handed out the punishment was Taigaâs flashlight. Unable to give any sort of explanation, he rushed wordlessly to the kitchen and washed his hands and face,
âWhat happened to Takasu-kun all of a sudden?! Was it the work of the seaweed ghost?!â
As Minori asked while worriedly giving RyĆ«ji a playful chop to the back of his neck, he couldnât even reply. Frantically bringing the bleed to a trickle, he held his nose and turned his face upwards. Ami was peering at RyĆ«jiâs face while looking amazed,
âAnyway, hereâs a tissue! You know, I wonder, how in the world could this have happened?! Ah, could it possibly be, maybe you were overstimulated by what happened earlier âthat timeâ?â
Seriously pretending that he hadnât heard Ami murmur an inappropriate âFufuâ ,
âNo, thatâs not it. I just picked my nose too much.â
âWhat are you, an elementary school kid or something!â
Seeming as if sheâd suffered a blow to her pride, Ami executed a flawless , which then caused RyĆ«ji to feel rather embarrassed. So then, curling up tightly so that Minori couldnât see, he gently pressed the tissue to his nose while thinking,
âHey, whatâs going on, whyâs everyone together?â
Kitamura asked in a clear voice.
âAh~, the seaweed made Takasu-kunâs nose bleâŠOh my gosh, what happened to you~~?!â
At Minoriâs sudden surprised shout, Ami and RyĆ«ji both turned around and looked at Kitamura. The sight left them at a loss for words.
âAhaha~!â
âHey, this isnât a situation where you should be laughing, is it?!â
âWell, I was just about done putting the bike away in the shed, which was rather cramped, when I tried to push aside some of the heavy machineryâŠand I kind of got myself pinned.â
Laughing and dripping black oil from all over his body, Kitamuraâs glasses had become sunglasses, and there were splotches of blood oozing out from slight cuts in various places including his face and elbows. His appearance utterly trumped the impact of RyĆ«jiâs nosebleed.
âAh, I canât believe it! Are you okay, YĆ«saku?!â
Taking back the tissues from RyĆ«jiâs hands, Ami went over to the much worse-off-looking Kitamura. After that,
ââŠWhatâs with the commotion? What in the world happened?â
The last one to show up was Taiga. Glancing at Kitamura who looked like an oil-soaked bird and Ryƫji with his doubly plugged nostrils, Taiga furrowed her brow,
â~Achoo!â
And let loose an extraordinary sneeze. However.
âAh~⊠Oh nononono⊠Did something happen to Taiga too?!â
âEhh? Ah, nah, justâŠKachoo~! I was cleaningâŠBachoo! And, there was so much dust, so my nose is a bitâŠChoo~!âŠUwah~âŠCchoo~!âŠHaaâŠâ
While sniffling pitifully, Taiga rubbed at her reddened eyes. All over her hair, her clothes, her hands, and even her legs, Taigaâs whole body was thickly covered in dustballs. Probably because she didnât have her flashlight, she must have been forced to crawl around blindly in the attic. Sending dust flying through the air every time she moved even a little bit, she kept making a scene like a page from a girlsâ comic every time she sneezed, except instead of flowers she was surrounded by dust balls.
ââŠYou guys are weird! Every one of you, youâre a~ll weird!â
Ami very clearly declared, taking the tissue box from Kitamura to Taiga whose nose was dripping. , he might have been thinking, but there was no way he could say that with things as they were.
* * *
With all the commotionâlike playing in the sea as soon as they arrived, performing major cleanup, going shopping, making Bakachi No. 1, or being attacked by Bakachi No. 1âtheyâd all gotten caught up in the moment, and so none of them had eaten anything for lunch by the time 4pm rolled around.
ââŠWhat a beautiful sunsetâŠâ
Standing by himself in the kitchen that he had personally scrubbed sparkling clean, Ryƫji pointedly stared outside the window as if trying to escape from the reality in front of him. By the way, his nosebleed had stopped completely, he had changed out of his t-shirt that had reeked of the beach, and he seemed to be enjoying the pleasant sea breeze as he stood near the open window. .
The shining rays of the sun were starting to fade, and through the window, he had a clear view of the water that glimmered with a splendid orange hue in the distant horizon. He could also hear the sound of the crashing waves and the wind outside, as well as the occasional cry of some seagulls.
To RyĆ«ji, who lived in a town that was fairly well-populated even if it couldnât be called a city, this place was just like another world. It had the kind of atmosphere where a guy would want to invite a girl he liked to go out for a walk, talking about the future together while taking a leisurely stroll on the beach and listening to the sound of the waves⊠But then, a shrill cry invaded RyĆ«jiâs thoughts and dragged him back to the real world.
âI said let go! You damned midget~!â
âNo way! I canât handle spicy stuff! This roux is no good!â
âYouâre so noisy. If youâre going to act this selfishly, then shouldnât you have gone along to do the shopping?! This roux is fine! I actually prefer spicy things! Here, Takasu-kun, catch!â
ââŠâ
Receiving the box of roux from Ami, he just realized heâd been dragged into quite a mess when,
âAckâŠ~!â
RyĆ«jiâs face twisted in pain. In an acrobatic display, Taiga had leaped up and latched onto one of RyĆ«jiâs arms, catching him somewhere between his waist and thigh with her bare feet in a crab-scissors and getting on top of him.
âNoooo~!â
âOuchâŠthat hurt!â
And following up, she shook him in the same way a giant monkey might shake a tree, so vigorously that he was worried she might dislocate his arm.
âWhat the heck?! What do you think youâre doing?! And why did you climb on me?!â
âRyĆ«ji, you can make a delicious meal even without the roux, right?! Youâve done it before, havenât you?! Frying with flour and adding in spices, you know how to do all that, donât you?! So then, just do the same thing tonight, because this roux is no good!â
Without waiting for RyĆ«ji to respond, Ami muttered âSo selfishâ before trying to yank Taiga off,
âUsing premade roux is the simplest way, and itâll taste good too!â
âRyĆ«jiâs cooking tastes much, much better though~!â
With them practically yelling into his ears, his arm being yanked, and being shaken about against his will, Ryƫji eventually got to his knees. He pulled Taiga off of him with one hand, then pushed Ami aside with one hand,
ââŠFine! I get it already!⊠But Taiga, since I donât have my prized spice collection, I canât bring out the same flavor as usual.â
âEhh?!â
Fufu, Ami laughed derisively, as if to say âHah, see that!â.
âBut, still⊠Itâs because you dislike spicy food, right? So Iâll just separate a portion especially for you, and Iâll season it with lots of milk and ketchup to make yours sweet.â
ââŠOoh~âŠâ
While Taiga was still a bit displeased, she had at least stopped yelling, but taking her place,
âYouâre spoiling her!â
This time, Ami puffed out her cheeks. Furrowing her brow and narrowing her eyes, she had her hands on her hips like a little kid.
âGeez Takasu-kun, once again, youâre giving special treatment only to Aisaka-san! If you keep this up, arenât other girls going to end up disliking you?â
And yet as she spoke, she had still retained her usual goody-goody pose up until then. Even her anger was just part of the act. However, suddenly twisting her lips and smirking wryly with just half her face, Amiâs eyes were starting to fill with the negative feelings that still lingered just beneath the surface. Lowering her voice to the utmost level, she was probably inaudible even to Taiga.
ââŠEven Minori-chan might end up disliking you, yâknow~?â
âWhâŠ~!â
While he had frozen up completely and she was close enough that he could feel her breath on his ear, Ryƫji was struck by her extended attack that sounded just like a snippet of a song.
âAh, I knew it, youâre blanching. Fu~hâŠâ
Amiâs teasing eyes were wreaking havoc on RyĆ«jiâs well-being. Her lips were pulled ever so slightly into a smile,
âTakasu-kun, if you keep acting this way, maybe Iâll tell Minori-chan about âthatâ⊠Like âTakasu-kun peeked at me in the showerââŠâ
âY, you werenât actually taking a shower though!â
ââŠFufu. Maybe so, but that canât be confirmed anymore, now can it?â
Flipping her hair, Ami pulled away. With a devilish smile on her fair face, she certainly looked beautiful on the outside at least, but there was something definitely warped about it, because it was a blackness inside her that in the end managed to seep to the surface. In any case, RyĆ«ji wasnât able to say another word.
Between the two uncomfortably tense individuals, Taiga settled into place,
ââŠWhat was that about Minorin?â
She looked back and forth between RyĆ«ji and Ami, peering into their faces suspiciously. Ami, who had on her normal angelic smile, said âNothing~â while RyĆ«ji just gulped. And there was one more person present amongst them,
âDid you call? Did you call for me?â
In the cramped space between Taiga and Ami, Minori was standing there⊠Smiling innocently, her pure eyes sparkled as she looked warmly at her friends. Somehow, it seemed like she hadnât picked up on what Ami had said just moments ago. RyĆ«ji discreetly licked his dried lips.
âHm? Minorin, are you feeling okay now?â
âYeah, I feel a lot better now that Iâve rested on a bed for a while, so I thought Iâd come help out in the kitchen. Hehehe, I also want to see the rumored âDivine Blade of Takasuâ, you know? According to one report, Iâve heard that Takasu-kun can completely dice an onion in ten seconds?â
, in the face of Minoriâs smile, RyĆ«ji felt like prostrating himself before her. Because he and Taiga had used Bakachi No. 1 to scare her, sheâd been resting the whole time up until now. And yet, in this place where the actual perpetrator, the primary offender, and even the model for Bakachi No. 1 were gathered, she was kindly bestowing a smile that was lovelier than anyone elseâs.
â10 seconds is probably impossibleâŠBut,â
Even while desperately looking away from her blinding brilliance, he wanted to live up to Minoriâs expectations as much as he possibly could. He expertly grabbed three onions in one hand,
â15 seconds should be enough.â
He declared.
âOh~! You really said it! Well then, please let me observe your skills. Can I help you somehow? I guess Takasu-kun will be the boss for tonightâs cooking, right?â
It wasnât the onions, which he had yet to slice with the knife, that caused him to tear up. âCan I help?â Those simple words had done it. That line that would make him happy pretty much regardless of who said it, the person he wanted to hear it from the most had actually said those words to him. Turning around without thinking,
ââŠHm? Whatâs with that look?â
He ended up staring straight at Taiga. Of course, she had absolutely no intention of helping as she sat down with a plop onto a chair, playing with some yogurt that was out on the table like she really wanted to eat it, at least until Ami tried to confiscate it. Actually, in a certain sense that wasnât the same as with Minori, he would have really liked to hear her offering to help, butâŠ
âA, alright then Kushieda⊠Why donât you skin the potatoes.â
âO~kay~. I wonder, is there no peeler? How many should I prepare?â
It happened just after Minori had thrust her hand into the bag and pulled out a couple of small potatoes with her delicate fingers.
âAh, I feel so refreshed!â
A sudden pitter-pattering of bare feet hitting the floor approached the kitchen,
âOh, have you already started preparing dinner? I know Iâm completely hopeless at cooking, but you could have called on me to help set the table at least!â
Kitamura, who had taken a shower first to wash off the sand and smelled freshly of soap, clapped Ryƫji on the shoulder. However.
ââŠH, hey! Your clothesâŠâ
âWhew, itâs so hotâŠOops! Ah, my bad, so the girls were here?â
ââŠ~?!â
Taiga, who had turned around at the sound of Kitamuraâs voice, let go of the yogurt. Falling backwards in her chair, hitting the back of her head against the wall, and falling to the floor, Taiga looked like she had swallowed a lethal poison as her face wildly fluctuated, flushing red, blue, and then white as she searched for a place to hide, sticking near the wall until she finally hid herself behind Ami, whom she had just been arguing with up until only a moment ago. Not yet taking notice of the situation, Ami was twisting herself about in annoyance,
âWhat the heck are you doing all of a suâŠHah?!â
Then she noticed. As if she couldnât believe her eyes, Ami blinked in confusion for a while before directing a scrutinizing gaze at her childhood friend, and then after a certain point where it seemed sheâd had enough,
âYĆ«saku!!! Have you gone crazy?!
Is what she said. RyĆ«ji sympathized quite readily with her reaction. However, laughing with a âTeheheâ, Kitamura just shook his wet head without a single sign of embarrasment,
âI accidentally left my change of clothes in my room. So, I was on my way to get changed now.â
âThen why did you have to stop by here first?!â
âWell, thatâs because I saw Takasu.â
âAre you an idiot?!â
âHahaha, who could have guessed you girls would be here tooâ⊠Showing off a naturally wild style as he only covered the most necessary parts of his lower body with a single towel, he was standing with a steady stance. Even from RyĆ«jiâs male perspective, his physique that had been tempered with athleticism was enviably slender and yet firm as well⊠Now wasnât the time to be saying such things. As it was, he was even more exposed than when he was wearing trunks at the pool. If you were to look at him from behind, it seemed likely that his rear would actually be visible.
âTa, Taiga, pull it together!â
ââŠFuwahâŠâ
And Taiga, who had been in the perfect position to see this foolish guy from behind, had suffered a meltdown. The light had completely gone out of her eyes, and she had assumed a sitting fetal position as she continued to stare at the wall. It seemed she had seen it, his âopen-sourceâ rear. He couldnât help thinking that she was really prone to seeing others in the nude.
âAre you some sort of exhibitionist or something? Horrible~â
With the familiarity of a childhood friend, Ami directed a cold gaze at Kitamuraâs naked body, however,
âFufufu⊠I, Kushieda, am not so disinclined to taking on an exhibitionistâŠâ
Whispering in an almost growling tone, Minori lifted her down-turned face,
âYou narcissus from above! Give me a nude shot!â
Leaping just like a grasshopper or something, she dove towards the floor. And so, sliding with her shoulder against the floor, she tumbled over like she was break-dancing towards the feet of the near-naked Kitamura,
âWhat the heck, get away, cut it out!â
âItâs too late to be saying that now! Youâve already gone this far looking like that, hmm?! How are you going to say âNoâ or âCut it outâ as if youâre so innocent, huh~?! Follow the rural customs when youâre in the countryside, go get nude in a nudistâs colony, this is a surprise shot, you freak!â
She whipped her cellphone out of her pocket and vigorously aimed the camera at Kitamura. It wasnât clear whether or not she actually took a photo, but the wide stance, the exposed rear, and the rapid-fire harassment, they wouldnât forget any of it.
âS, suddenly this seems really embarrassing!â
Hit by a severely delayed bout of self-consciousness, Kitamura finally prepared to retreat out of the kitchen. Right at that moment,
*Flutter*
ââŠ~!â
In the exact moment the towel, that had been preserving decency, fell to the floor, RyĆ«ji leaped forward to prevent the girlsâ eyes from being soiled. With that last ditch dive, he miraculously covered Kitamuraâs nether regions with a plate,
ââŠSomething just now, some sort of afterimage wasâŠSomething likeâŠBlackâŠ?â
Grimacing, Minori seemed to have noticed something from the inner corner of her eye. Sitting firmly on the floor Japanese-style, she tilted her head.
âIt, itâs the seaweed ghost. Maybe.â
While doing his utmost to conceal the nudity, Ryƫji gave a silent prayer. And so, he turned to Minori,
âKushieda, I can handle things from here, so why donât you go rest in the living room for a while? Weâll make sure to call you when the curryâs done, okay?â
ââŠReally?⊠I guess Iâll do just that thenâŠFor some reason, the seaweed spiritâs afterimage is stuck in my head⊠Or itâs burnt into my retina or something, Iâm not quite sureâŠâ
Minori made her way out of the kitchen with uncertain footsteps. As soon as he had finished watching her leave, RyĆ«jiâs eyes turned brutally fierce as if he were a demon,
âGeez you, youâre seriously horrible! The worst!â
He smacked Kitamuraâs bare bottom with the plate (It would be fine for Taiga to use this plate afterwards).
âDid you come on this trip just so you could pull something like this?! Even if you plan to run for student council president in the next election, I wonât vote for you!â
âIâm reflecting on what I did though!â
RyĆ«ji kicked the guy he had even called his best friend out of the kitchen and towards the second floor where the bedrooms were. ; he really wanted to show this situation to Mayu and Nanako and the other female Kitamura supporters. Heâd really like to let them know that their âfun to tease but lovable Maruo-kunâ had done such a foolhardy thing like this. He inadvertantly recalled the smiles of his friends who werenât here right now. Phantasmic visions of those guys whirled about him, whispering.
ââŠGeez, damnit, that guyâŠâ
Even as he prepared the trashbag in order to get back to peeling the onions that he had put on hold earlier, his malice had yet to fade. He had finally gotten the chance to be next to Minori in the kitchen, yet he would have never guessed that Kitamura of all people would get in the way like that.
âAh~~, Minori-chan is so pitiable~~â
The one who had murmured in a happy tone that lacked even a hint of pity was Ami. Turning around in a fit of anger,
ââŠKawashima, get over here and help. Your childhood friendâs bungling has cost us a pair of hands, after all.â
Gesturing with his chin, he indicated the potatoes that Minori had left unpeeled, but,
âHuh?â
The time lapse preceding her response had been practically nonexistent.
Amiâs face momentarily twisted, in a way that made him want to tell her she really didnât need to make such a face. Ami practically spit as she prefaced with a âYouâve gotta be kiddingâ before facing him with a faint smile,
âWhy should Ami-chan have to?â
As it was, he couldnât choose just one term to faithfully describe her personality from the myriad of characteristics such as 'selfishâ, âtyrannicalâ, ânarrow-mindedâ, âarrogantâ and so on.
Ryƫji knew exactly what Ami wanted to actually say, and so he just nodded.
ââŠFine then, go take some barley tea to Kushieda.â
âEh~? But I was going to stay here and watch Takasu-kun cookâŠUpuh!â
As soon as he deftly sliced the onion in half, Ami, who had been looking in her bag, quickly turned her face away.
ââŠF, fine, I got it! Iâll go take the barley tea then!⊠Itâs like Iâm being chased out or something⊠I just canât stand itâŠâ
Her eyes immediately going red, Ami made her way out of the kitchen with a cup in one hand even while looking disgruntled. That just left Ryƫji and Taiga alone in the kitchen, but,
âHey, are you alright?â
ââŠâ
Taiga still remained near the wall, her shoulders visibly heaving as she wheezed. The shock of seeing Kitamuraâs rear end must have been enormous. And she likely hadnât forgotten the trauma of seeing Ami either. Without thinking, he extended his hand to grab her arm and help her stand, but,
ââŠHey you, this isnât the time to be worrying about other people.â
Shaking off his grasp, Taiga unsteadily got to her feet using the wall for support.
âIâm seriously fine⊠Iâll just override this trauma with an even stronger trauma⊠Yacchanâs big breasts, Yacchanâs big breasts, Yacchanâs big breastsâŠ. Ohh~âŠâ
âDonât go making someoneâs parent out to be traumatizing.â
In any case, Taiga finally gave a single shake of her head, and her breathing seemed to have returned to normal. Glaring up at RyĆ«jiâs eyes while he worriedly peered at her face, she said only one thing.
âYou dim-witted dog.â
âHaa~â, sighing in a seemingly exaggerated way, Taiga had gone right back to speaking hostilely.
âIâm completely stunned. Today of all days, how could you have passed up this chance to cook with Minorin after all we went through? And it was basically your one and only chance to show off your skills.â
âEven if thatâs true, thereâs really no helping it, right? Since it wasnât my fault. It was all because of Kitamura.â
âThere you go blaming other people again! This is why dogs merely crawl! Itâs like you donât realize what a predicament this is, not at all!â
Flipping her hair, Taiga scrunched up her face as if deeply depressed, and expressing an even greater degree of pity, she stared straight at Ryƫji.
âW, what do you mean, predicament?â
âBecause on this trip, right now, itâs not going well at all, donât you see? Only going halfway with scaring her, and then not even making any further appeals. Seriously, you havenât been putting in nearly enough effort in getting closer to Minorin at all. I almost canât believe it.â
ââŠCome on, donât say that. Besides, didnât we succeed in scaring her earlier? You know, with that thing. The Bakachi No. 1.â
âBut, the plan isnât moving forward at all. You canât possibly think that just that alone was enough, can you?â
ââŠItâs not like Iâm thinking that, but,â
Cruelly clicking her tongue and shrugging her shoulders, Taiga interrupted him as if to say that listening to RyĆ«jiâs vague reply would be worthless to her.
âDonât make pointless excuses. Iâm cooperating; Iâd do practically anything if it meant destroying that dog-filled future. But, I just canât go so far as to manipulate Minorinâs heart. That partâs all up to you. To put it bluntly, up until now, I still havenât seen you showing even the tiniest bit of effort.â
ââŠâ
After listening to all that, he couldnât think of a single thing he could say in return. Looking down at the onion he had left cut in two and forgotten, RyĆ«ji remained silent thinking, .
âAh geez, what an irritating face⊠From now on, you should try putting your blood, sweat, and tears into turning things around, donât you think? Iâm just cooperating by doing what I can. And right now, when it comes to cooperation, I can really only do something like thisâŠâ
As she continued muttering, she carefully opened the freezer. And then what she took out was the thing they had hidden just in case they might want to use it again, the Bakachi No. 1. Also known as the seaweed spirit.
ââŠItâs repetitive, but we donât have any other options, so I guess itâs better than nothing.â
With her bare hands, she tore off the long thread they had used to dangle the whole thing from the ceiling. Then, sticking the seaweed onto one end of the broom that had been left standing in the kitchen corner, she continued speaking.
âThere. Now itâs the prickly thrusting imitation ghost, Bakachi No. 2.â
ââŠHuh, how simplistic.â
Taiga was looking to one side of the kitchen at the dirt-sweeping window, an opening that was really meant for getting rid of rubbish but apparently also led directly to the wood deck. Peering about carefully like a cat,
âIf I go through here, I can make my way along the deck until Iâm just outside the living room. Then since Minorinâs sitting on the window-side of the sofa, I should be able to discreetly open the window and surprise her with this thing right hereâŠOf course, youâll have to pretend like Iâm actually still inside.â
âPretend you say, but just howâŠ?â
âAt least handle that much on your own, sheesh.â
Removing her slippers and silencing her footsteps, Taiga was just about to make her way outside whenâŠ
â~!â
She had knocked over a bowl. The two of them froze momentarily, sticking to the wall and not breathing, but it seemed like no one else had noticed. Picking the bowl up carefully, Taiga put it back where it belonged and then sneakily made her way out to the wood deck via the sweepout window.
So, if he was supposed to pretend as if Taiga was still nearby, thenâŠsomething like this maybe?
ââŠOh! Thatâs a rather good approach, Taiga! Youâre surprisingly skilled at this!â
While quite skillfully handling the kitchen knife to finely dice the onion himself, Ryƫji pretended to chat in a loud voice. Hopefully, it was enough so that everyone could hear him loud and clear.
âHey, would you mind getting me that bowl over there? Oh! Thank you! Okay then, take care of the carrots next! Oh, nice! You do it rather well, donât you Taiga!â
This farce of a one-man play sounded completely unbelievable. But, it was what he had to do, for now at least. Even as RyĆ«jiâs face turned stiff, he continued to frantically raise his voice.
âAlright then Taiga! Next, letâsâŠâ
Then it happened.
âGyaaa~aa~ah!âŠâ A horrific scream emanated from the living room. The second after he looked up and thought, ,
ââŠI really did it. The whole thing went almost too perfectlyâŠ!â
Taiga sneakily slipped back inside via the sweepout window at the side of the kitchen. Closing the window carefully, they high-fived without making a sound.
âIt was just Minorin sitting on the sofa, so I simply tapped her on the shoulder with this guy here from the other side of the curtain outside!â
âGood job!â
Giving a thumbs up and nodding to one another, they both carefully picked up things like a knife or carrots to take with them,
âThat scream just now, what happened?!â
âMinorin, are you ok?â
And pretended to rush over. They made a lot of noise as they ran over to the living room. When they arrived, they saw Minori lying prone on the floor with her limbs outstretched,
âMinori-chan, whatâs the matter?! Pull it together!â
âKushieda, get a hold of yourself!â
Ami and the now clothed Kitamura were both tending to Minori. She looked distressedly stiff, and for some reason, she was pointing at Kitamura,
âI, i, i, it appeared⊠It really came out⊠A spirit possessing Kitamura⊠Kitamuraâs doppleganger didâŠ!â
âMe?! What?!â
Somehow, it had turned into a story about Kitamuraâs doppleganger. And then seeming to lose most of her strength, Minori became visibly covered in goosebumps and started shivering uncontrollably. Perhaps overstimulated past the blanching point, her face actually flushed pink instead.
âMi, MinorinâŠâ
As the actual perpetrator, Taiga very timidly moved closer. Taiga should be experiencing the same pangs of guilt that Ryƫji was feeling. Sitting down gently beside Minori,
âTa, Taiga iâŠis it really youâŠ?â
âYeah.â
She wiped away the perspiration from Minoriâs forehead, seeming extremely regretful.
ââŠTaiga⊠Be careful⊠Thereâs some sort of malicious intent hanging about this mansionâŠOooh~.â
âI, is that soâŠ?â
Taigaâs eyes shifted dubiously. As for RyĆ«ji, he couldnât even look Minori straight in the eyes as he was feeling a sharp pain in his chest.
âMi, Minorin, I wonder if thereâs anything I can do for youâŠâ
ââŠThe curry⊠Is the curry done yet?â
âNot even RyĆ«ji can finish cooking in less than five minutes, MinorinâŠâ
âI see⊠In that caseâŠBe sure to make mine an extra-extra spicy one please⊠Iâll takeâŠone thatâll really send this fear flying if you donât mindâŠâ
Gently caressing Taigaâs cheek with a trembling hand, Minori eventually used up the last of her strength and closed her eyes. Giving a firm nod, Taiga reassuringly whispered âIâll definitely make it for youâ. If it was for Minoriâs sake, it seemed like Taiga would even resolutely toss aside her selfishness about having a specially prepared dish.
RyĆ«ji had likewise come to a firm decision. If making a spicy curry could alleviate these fierce pangs of guilt, then heâd go to any lengths to make it spicy for her, no matter what.
And so, Ryƫji transformed into a cooking devil.
âUwah~! Amazing!â
Making the food dance freely in the air with skilled handling of the frying pan to where Ami, who had peeked in, was rendered speechless, RyĆ«ji used some of Amiâs fatherâs liquor to flambe various fruits for dessert, then switching pans, he started making a simple Takasu-styled chutney,
âIs there anything I can do to help?â
To Kitamura, the former village chief of the nudist colony who had asked just now, he gave the order, âWash the rice! Wash it like your life depends on it!â,
ââŠTaiga. You understand, right?!â
With a glint in his eyes that was like the edge of a sharp Yakuza blade, he directed his gaze at Taiga. Itâs not like he was trying to collect on an overdue loan by selling Taiga off somewhere; itâs just that he was pressing her to make a decision.
âYeah. You donât have your spice collection with you, so for right now, you have to use this insteadâŠâ
Taiga had nodded. She held in her hands a red spice that came attached with the roux and had a label that read: âSeasoning for extra spiciness * Shockingly HOT (Because it is extremely spicy, please adjust flavor using only very minute quantities. This is a warning that product may also cause harm to consumerâs health)â. If it was Minoriâs wish, then there was no helping it⊠With a resolute expression, she tore the package of spice completely open. For Taiga who had never tasted anything more than mildly spicy, this was an adventure, no wait, she was just being completely reckless and foolhardy.
Into the pot it went, where it would take about fifteen minutes to cook. And then, saying âI found this. Itâs from last year, but maybe we can use it anyway?â, Ami took the pack of curry and chili pepper that she had discovered lying in the kitchen drawer and without a second thought tossed that in too, resetting the fifteen minutes theyâd have to wait for the dish to finish.
And thus according to RyĆ«jiâs unspoken plan to avoid overcooking and yield something akin to the school-served curry, the potatoes were still in round pieces and the onions were still recognizable when the simple curry filled with lots of carrots and lightly browned pork was finished.
ââŠEven if I try to put it in a single word like âspicyâ, or for example âsaltyâ, the wasabi will make your nose burn, the chili peppers will burn your tongue, itâll burn your throatâŠAnd I think youâll experience a wide variety of spiciness even beyond that. I sampled tonightâs curry earlier, and I have to say itâs got an extreme taste that knocked me straight in the head. I stuck to Kushiedaâs request, but even so, I tried to make it simply, along the lines of villa-type cuisine.â
With a helping of rice and curry on each of their plates, they were all seated around the dining room table, and the other members were gazing steadily at RyĆ«jiâs lips as he continued his exposition because they were swollen, practically throbbing.
For such roe-lips to be caused by just a taste, they wondered then just what further potential might lie in wait. At the quiet dining table where the sound of the waves continued to resound, a spicy aroma was already wafting through the air.
ââŠSo anyway, prepare yourselves and dig in. Itadakimasu!â
âItadakimas~su!â they echoed back, and everyone took a spoon in hand, opened their mouths and quickly took a mouthful. A silence prevailed over the table for merely a second.
ââŠHm? Isnât it rather mild?â
Was Minoriâs response.
âYeah, yeah, but itâs okay in a normal sense.â
Ami replied.
âThe pork, Iâve got a fatty partâŠâ
Taiga said.
âYeah, not bad, not bad! As expected of Takasu!â
Spoke the nudist.
It took about three seconds; that was how long until the general consensus of âWhat the heckâ turned into voiceless screams.
ââŠ!âŠâ
Just as everyone was about to take their second bite, they all suddenly stopped moving their spoons,
âTâŠthere, there it is! This stuff really does have a kick to it!â
âH, h, ho~~t!! Water, water, I need water!â
âHot~, oww~, itâs spicy~, gah~ I spilt my water!â
âAh~âŠ*cough*, *cough*, it, my throatâŠ*cough*!â
While watching the others all continue to writhe in pain, RyĆ«ji discreetly turned his focus on Minori. âYeah! There it is! What a kick! I really felt it! Ooh, there it is again!â âŠMinori was really hyped as she shoveled the curry down her throat in a manly fashion. Then, noticing RyĆ«jiâs gaze,
âTa, Takasu-kun! Youâre the best! Itâs super spicy, itâs so good! Spicy, great, first-rate! Iâm seriously happy! This totally exceeded my expectations; it totally blew my fear and sadness away!â
She gave him a thumbs up. His mouth felt like it was being burned away by the flames of purgatory, but deep down inside, he couldnât help but feel a gradual surge of happiness and embarrassment.
âAh, well⊠Itâs because you said youâd like for it to be spicyâŠâ
âEh~, so you actually made it spicy like this just for me?! Oh my, Iâm deeply moved! Well then, it looks like Iâll have to take seconds!â
Laughing and smiling even as her face flushed red from the spiciness, Minori showed RyĆ«ji her plate that had been cleared clean. Going âUwah~!â on the inside, he was practically dissolving in euphoria. If doing this sort of thing could yield such bliss, he would make this every single day of his life âŠOf course, he couldnât say such a thing, and so without saying a word, RyĆ«ji took Minoriâs plate and proceeded to dish out a second helping for her.