Ch84 - Summation

Implied molestation. I am sorry to say this is going to be one of the ML’s bad habits…at least it’s one of his only bad habits (killing/imprisonment/torture aside)

It was a while before Gallant Outlaw recovered his senses. “You hit the hero with a pillow, so how did he react?”

“He ran away.”

Gallant Outlaw tried to imagine the scene and almost choked on his spit. “R-ran away?” he scratched his ears in puzzlement. “That’s not the protagonist’s style, ah. Even if you’re his shizun, he wouldn’t tolerate such a loss of face. Didn’t he do anything else?”

Hehe, how could that be possible. That rebellious disciple kissed me, alright?

But Xie Zhiwei had his pride and would never be so honest, so he only gave a vague “mhm” in response.

Gallant Outlaw was left confused. “Then you’ve hit him, so what’s there to be mad about? That’s the big god Mu He of the entire novel, ah.”

Xie Zhiwei couldn’t help a cold laugh. “Heheh, hitting him two times doesn’t even hurt. It can’t make up for anything.”

“Make up?” Gallant Outlaw was lost. “But Idol, you’ve already given him Qingping Sword and your secret teachings, so you’re really poor now. What else could the hero see in you?”

“…….” said Xie Zhiwei. So naive. Bro, I still possesses the basic dignity of a man!

Gallant Outlaw went on, “Forget it Idol, since you can’t explain yourself, just give me the authority to see with my own eyes. That’s more straightforward. I can even help you analyze the problem.”

“Wait!” Xie Zhiwei slapped his head. “Anger made me an idiot. You can’t…watch this.” His heart was palpitating. If he gave Gallant Outlaw authorization, wouldn’t the author see how that unfilial disciple did all sorts of things to him? Where could he put his pride then?

Xie Zhiwei took a deep breath. “I’d better tell you myself.”

Gallant Outlaw quickly changed to flattering him. “Alright, I believe Idol will definitely summarize the entire thing clearly and concisely.”

And so, Xie Zhiwei opened up like floodgates to tell everything from Mu He showing off his handwriting at the Buddhist sect, to capturing Bai Yu and Bai Jianzhu for torture, to Qiu Chongyun forcing him to fake-act as Chi Yan, and finally Mu He trying to kill him as a sacrificial offering.

Gallant Outlaw could only stammer, “All these ups and downs, in only a month ah. Idol, you went through so much. Even I couldn’t write all that if my brain burned. And then, and then?”

Xie Zhiwei said, “Don’t interrupt. And then I fled, but Cheese got in my way before I escaped the daoist sect. He broke my mask, the hero saw, and everything went out of control.”

“What kind of out of control?”

Word by word, Xie Zhiwei said, “The hero said he liked me.”

There was silence before something seem to click: the small sound of a jaw dropping. Expecting this, Xie Zhiwei asked expressionlessly, “Hey, you still there, Gallant Outlaw?”

Some time passed before Gallant Outlaw spoke again, but his voice was visibly quavering.

“H-here here here,” Gallant Outlaw swallowed with difficulty and finally steadied himself with a dry laugh. “Nothing wrong, ah. It’s common for disciples to like their shizuns, this proves you were a very successful master who gained your disciple’s deep affections.”

Xie Zhiwei fell silent.

Gallant Outlaw dry laughed again. “Idol, why aren’t you saying anything? Isn’t my analysis reasonable?”

Xie Zhiwei nodded. “You’re right. He loves and respects me.”

“Heheheh, that’s good that’s good, you don’t need to worry about him shouting bloody murder at you anymore.”

“So he rips my clothes, gropes my body, and jerked me off once with Black Lotus. Oh right, and he kissed me too—the kind with tongue. This is how a disciple loves and respects his master, no problem.”

“……..” said Gallant Outlaw.

“Gallant Outlaw,” said Xie Zhiwei. “Speak.”

Another stretch of time passed before a blank, wooden tone replied. “He…ripped your clothes, groped you, jerked you off with Black Lotus, and kissed you?”

Youngster, I understand your feelings. As the person involved, I feel more shocked than you. Do you have to repeat all the specifics again?

“Mhm.” Xie Zhiwei’s face was full of black lines.

Gallant Outlaw began to seriously stutter. “I was just…why, how could…unless…what if…”

Impatient, Xie Zhiwei said, “Can you stop half-saying things and get to the point? What’s wrong with you?”

Gallant Outlaw grew suddenly solemn. “Idol, the System didn’t consider you OOC even when you hit the hero. Have you checked your Presence Points lately?”

Xie Zhiwei mocked, “Who cares about Presence Points at a time like this? I had no idea your protagonist had hidden queer attributes. Tell me whether this plot can still go on—”

His vision went black.

Following that came a cold metallic beep. “Hello. You have already exceeded the 20-minute daily limit for using the System. In order to prevent malicious evasion of the plot, the System has forced a shutdown.”

WTF? ? Xie Zhiwei thought. But the System disconnected without acknowledging his feelings. He sat upright on the bed and nearly imploded on the spot. Trying to contact Gallant Outlaw again only got him a repeated message: You have reached your daily limit today. Please try again tomorrow.

Try your sister, ah! It’ll be too late by then!

Xie Zhiwei went around in circles all day before recalling the last words from Gallant Outlaw. It had been some time since he checked his Presence Points. Today he’d sneered and creased his eyebrows and even threw pillows, but the System didn’t care a whit. That was really abnormal.

He opened up the interface and saw that half of the last star had been lit up. When he went to study the restrictions more closely, the System sounded out loud. “Hello, congratulations on reaching 4.5 stars and unlocking 99% of all permissions. Besides beating and cursing others, you can freely use all words and actions required for your role. There is still half a star left. Please make further efforts to maintain the persona of the original host on the basis of your 99%.”

Xie Zhiwei closed the System and had a brief moment of happiness. But he soon realized how he’d gained the extra points. Presence Points came from his presence index in the plot, which completely revolved around the protagonist. Thus, if the protagonist thought, kissed, and hugged him, there was no need to question his existence.

This was already a far cry from Gallant Outlaw’s “dual male leads” setting. This was simply stealing the heroine’s scenes and sticking them on his own head!

What should he say?

Mengmeng, Aunt Yun, sister Yin, and the tens of thousands of girls in Mu He’s harem—I’m sorry, ah. I’ve bent your man.

But the problem was he didn’t want this either, ah. A perfectly fine hero bent just like that, could Gallant Outlaw agree?!

Forget it, let’s do what I need to do. I’ll find Gallant Outlaw to discuss things later.

It was a peaceful night. Mu He didn’t come to harass him again while a servant brought him hot water to wash. Xie Zhiwei took a bath to clean himself thoroughly and felt very comfortable. In the end he didn’t forget to ask, “Where is your Shizi?”

The servant girl about 11 to 12 years old was wiping the water stains on the ground when she answered. “Our Shizi’s quarters are at the eastern end, about one li away from here.”

Xie Zhiwei was relieved and went straight to bed. His nerves were so taut that his IQ temporarily dropped and he forgot that the concept of distance was nonexistent in the cultivation world.

That night, wisps of black qi seeped in along the window cracks in silence. The bed curtains were hanging down and Xie Zhiwei’s breaths were even as he slept peacefully on his back. The black qi seemed to come to life as it floated towards him, finally coalescing into a lotus shape above his forehead before slowly sinking into his seven orifices.

Xie Zhiwei’s brow shifted slightly before his head tilted to one side, his breaths now longer and deeper. The next moment, a candle lighted itself, shining a bright orange light before the bed. The bed curtains moved before an additional white-robed figure appeared inside, his profile reflected as a shadow against the curtain like an elaborate paper cutout.

“Shizun…” the white-robed figure touched the face of the man on the bed before slowly pressing against his body. One arm wrapped around his body and lifted him up for a quick kiss, while the other took his hand and brought it between his legs.

—

The next day, Xie Zhiwei woke up refreshed and changed into his long-lost daoist robes. Immediately, he felt like he’d returned to his old and virtuous self. He opened the doors to his room and saw that the entire courtyard was confined beneath a boundary field intertwined with Black and White Lotus energy, making it impossible to escape. There was cooking smoke in the compound as well, so it seemed to be well equipped. They could probably stay a month here without starving.

The subordinates guarding outside noticed the commotion and rushed over to help him freshen up, followed by the little maid who came carrying a lunchbox. Xie Zhiwei could almost feel himself tearing up: this was the life of the rich…just like his own a lifetime ago.

The lunch box had enough food to fill the table. Although the dishes were light, they were full of fresh fish and fragrant meat. Even the vegetables were green and oily enough to stimulate the appetite. Xie Zhiwei gulped imperceptibly and figured it was justified to eat a couple of meals after treating Mu He so well in the past. Thus, he sat down and picked up his chopsticks.

It had been days since he put rice to teeth, so once he started he couldn’t stop. He almost ate until he burped before reluctantly dropping the chopsticks. The King of Nine Provinces was a hedonistic man who had famous cooks working in his estate; today he tasted the proof.

Especially a plate of white-hued meat he’d polished off completely.

Xie Zhiwei actually couldn’t tell what kind of meat that was, since it was tender like fish but tasted nothing like seafood. There wasn’t even a single fish bone. He thought about it then asked, “What kind of meat was in this plate?”

The little maid replied respectfully, “To reply Xie zhenren, this is the ice carp tribute from the North Sea. I heard that it melts in one’s mouth and doesn’t have a single bone. It doesn’t even taste like fish.”

“It’s indeed good. I rather like it,” Xie Zhiwei said thoughtfully.

Happy, the little maid clapped her hands. “That’s great! If zhenren likes it, the kitchen can cook it everyday.”

“Many thanks, then,” Xie Zhiwei nodded and asked, “Where did your family’s Shizi go?”

“I heard they captured two people that the Shizi wants to interrogate personally,” the maid replied. “Also, something happened at the palace, so Shizi left first thing in the morning.”

Excellent. I hope he doesn’t come back for a lifetime.

Of course, that was impossible.

Xie Zhiwei next asked, “Do you know who were the two people he captured?”

—

Translator’s Note: Do you know? 5/20 and 5/21 sound similar to 我愛你 (I love you) in some dialects of Chinese! And thus…let’s spread the love with double releases today and tomorrow!

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