No wonder that figure was so familiar. Although he wasnât as slim as four years ago and dressed in vulgar clothing, his unique aura was unmistakable.
âBecause it was shizun himself!
But shizun was a man who loved cleanliness. For the sake of avoiding him, he even jumped into the mud and cursed to cover up his identity. How intelligent. Who would expected a timid coward with coarse language to be the world-famous Bixu zhenren?
Tantai Meng saw that Mu He wasnât responding and thought this eccentric Shizi had finally realized his mistakes. She couldnât help adding fuel to the fire. âSee how much Benefactor wanted to avoid you? Heâd rather wrong himself than reveal himself. I donât know if you and Benefactor know each other or had something happen between you, but you shouldnât compare him to the likes of Chi Yan since he defended you.â
Mu He had no interest in listening to Tantai Mengâs ramblings any more. His heart was clouded with suspicion.
ShizunâŚwhy is he avoiding me?
Who is the person shizun wants to seeâŚbut is afraid to meet?
He stood stiffly, his heart plunged into clouded doubts. If Xie Zhiwei really wanted to avoid him, why praise him in front of someone unrelated? Why bring up all those memories he held near and dear? He said for Mu He to take care, but healed his hand back in Blood River Lakeâfor what reasons?
If he was heartless, then shouldnât he keep far away from him? To appear before him in a different identity, was heâŚ
âSomeone he wants to see, but is afraid to meet,â Mu He muttered to himself.
The sun was setting in the west, its warm glow reflecting against his robe like a hazy layer of light on snow. He suddenly lifted his eyes, which were roiling with emotions.
ââŚI think I know who.â
Tantai Mengâs eyes widened. âYou do? You knew Benefactor in the past?â
The question finally brought Mu He back to his senses. He quickly withdrew the smile that had bloomed on his face and turned back. âYou should go.â
His attitude changed so quickly that Tantai Meng didnât react at first. âWhat?â
Mu He slowly walked towards the courtyard and tossed back, âYouâre not important enough for me to kill you personally yet.â
It was he who had overestimated this womanâs worth in shizunâs heart. Shizun was kindhearted by nature and valued ties and righteousness. If he killed her, shizun would only mourn her in the future. MoreoverâŚthis woman had somehow stumbled her way into letting him catch a glimpse of shizunâs heart.
Tantai Meng let go of the bamboo sheâd been holding and chased after him. âThen, you wonât hurt Benefactor, right?â
In the sound of the breeze, only a soft sound answered her. âHmph.â
Afterwards, Tantai Meng crashed into something solid and was knocked to the ground. All signs of Mu He vanished and even the courtyard turned blurry as the entire bamboo grove seemed obscured in a layer of thick white fog. But it was many times harder than mist, like a wall. Tantai Meng tried hitting it a few times, but it didnât budge. She used Golden Lotus next and gathered all her strength to break through the barrier. But it was much harder this time. Anywhere the gold light hit was met with black qi emerging from the mist that sucked in the light to recover the barrier. It was as if the gold light was entering an endless black hole.
Tantai Meng had never seen Black or White Lotus in her life. The entire world believed that these two treasures had been destroyed with Xie Zhiwei into dust to become nothing more than legends. In her eyes, Mu Heâs cultivation base was simply terrifying, reaching to heights that even rivaled Golden Lotus. But she felt the Shizi himself was even scarier. He wanted to kill her one second, but patiently spoke with her about Benefactor the next. Benefactor must be suffering a lot in his hands.
Looks like I need to find reinforcementsâthe really powerful kind.
She braced herself and stood up, shouting into the courtyard. âBenefactor, donât worry! Iâll definitely find a high-level expert to save you!â
â
When Mu He was about to step over the threshold, he suddenly stopped and looked inside. Lying peacefully on the bed was Xie Zhiwei, his body covered beneath a quilt as he slept soundly. Mu He suddenly realized that this was the first time heâd seen his master sleeping. In the past, shizun had too many burdens and responsibilities on his shoulders, so only now could he rest in peace. Mu He couldnât help but sigh. How could shizun have gotten that ending if heâd just been a little more selfish and tougher in the past?
Now it seemed like shizun didnât want to return to his past self. Perhaps too many petty people had hurt his heart, so he wanted to live the rest of his life for himself. That was fine too. Four years ago, he already wished shizun could be more self-centered.
But with him here, his master was destined to have no peace. He was going to entangle with him for a lifetime! Only death would keep them apart! Meeting someone as paranoid as him was probablyâŚtruly unlucky for shizun.
As soon as he had this thought, Mu Heâs pupils shrank.
âLanxiu had eight livesâ worth of misfortune to meet the likes of you!â
Like a thunderbolt, the rebuke exploded in his head. He suddenly recalled scenes of Ming Kongâs actions and Shen Youâs tragic end one by one. Mu He took a deep breath and suppressed the overwhelming emotions in his heart. A disdainful smile rose to his lips.
Four years ago he had looked down on Ming Kong. How could he be the same as him now? How could Shen Youâs feelings toward Ming Kong compare to shizunâs feelings for himself? For the sake of avoiding him, shizun even spoke foul language, which proved his importance in his masterâs eyes. Had shizun ever cursed for anyone besides himself?
Mu Heâs gaze grew gentle as he approached the bed, no longer looking at Xie Zhiwei with eyes of fervent attachment. He slowly sat by the bedside and helped Xie Zhiwei up until the man was lying in his arms. Although he knew Xie Zhiwei wouldnât wake easily after the effects of Black Lotus, he was still very slow and light with his actions.
Outside, Dog was fishing in the pond while splashing water everywhere. Half of its fur was stuck to its body. The wind whistled through the bamboo and a few leaves occasionally drifted down silently. Gradually, the skies darkened and the moon appeared far in the sky, bright and faint like the evenings four years ago above Suihan Lodge.
Mu He remained holding Xie Zhiwei and seemed to travel back to the night heâd brought Dog back to the house. Shizun had been looking through the bookshelves while candle light illuminated his body. Although his study was a simple room, the scene had looked ethereal.
Mu He touched the closed eyelids of the person in his lap and swept his fingertips gently over the eyelashes. âShizun, only by holding you now does disciple thinkâŚitâs great to be alive.â
As long as his master could willingly stay by his sideâand stay foreverâthen he would try whatever method worked. Shen Youâs experience had left a lump in his throat, to say nothing of the trauma it gave his master.
Fine. Shizun doesnât like being forced, so Iâll take it slow.
Iâm willing to restrain myself for shizunâs sake.
Mu He carefully set Xie Zhiwei back on the bed and prepared to wake him with Black Lotus so they could have a good talk. But the thin brocade quilt unexpectedly slipped and exposed his upper body to Mu Heâs sight. Although he was still dressed, it wasnât much better from being naked. Xie Zhiweiâs robes were already torn and ripped, revealing bits of skin. After being tossed and turned about all day, his hair was in a mess and covered his temples, revealing a very different look from his usual neat and orderly appearance. His breathing was even and long with sleep, completely oblivious to the world. He looked disheveled but also helpless, yet his expression was calm with the air of the ascetic.
While they were separated, Mu He had thought of Xie Zhiwei countless times, but all of that came from his memory. The real Xie Zhiwei before himâŚexceeded imagination. Mu He gave up the idea of summoning Black Lotus and stared at him with a deep gaze, feeling his mouth dry up. He lifted his robes before getting into bed as if possessed.
Swallowing hard, he thought, Although I wonât force shizun, if I do other thingsâŚwithout him knowing, it, should be all right, right?â
An outrageous idea emerged in his heart. Four years had passed since shizunâs death and heâd spent the time either thinking of revenge or how to kill himself. He hadnât jerked himself off once since then. Now that shizun was right here, why not use his handâŚ
Mu He picked up Xie Zhiweiâs hand, which was thin without much flesh but very well-proportioned and beautiful. Because it was used to holding swords and brushes, there were slight calluses on the fingers and palms. He gave the hand a shallow kiss before feeling his body heat up like coals.
âŚ
In the end, his shaking body collapsed on top of Xie Zhiwei as he kissed the manâs cheek. The corners of Mu Heâs lips curved up in obvious contentment even as a single tear dripped from his eye to trail down the personâs robes.
âFor disciple to meet shizun in this lifetimeâŚis truly wonderful.â