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Chapter 21. Worried, I Was Worried About You
“……. Raeyan?”
It was also a name that did not appear in the original. No matter how much I searched through my head, I couldn’t remember reading the name “Raeyan.”
Maybe he was lying to me about his name.
I looked quietly up at the man.
“You……no, Raeyan.”
“Tell me.”
“Yoon Ga-eul. You looked at me and called me that. Why did you do that?”
I didn’t know if he would give me the clear answer I wanted or if he would answer ambiguously this time, too.
“I had a dream,” he responded.
“…….Dream?”
Raeyan nodded. “Of a different world than here. You are the person that kept appearing in those recurring dreams.”
‘I appeared in your dream?’
If a character in a novel dreamt of me from my previous life, did that mean that it was not just a coincidence that I transmigrated into this novel?
“As soon as I saw you, I could recognize you. That you are Yoon Ga-eul.”
Raeyan spoke with a stubbornly resolute tone and a gaze that did not question his own words at all.
I realized that there was no point denying or saying that person wasn’t me.
“Is that all? In your dream, a person named Yoon Ga-eul kept showing up, and as soon as you saw me, you recognized that I was that person.”
“…..Yes.”
I was sure that he was hiding something from the way he paused for a moment before answering, but I didn’t bother to ask.
Because he won’t tell me anyway.
‘By the way, You’re really bad at lying.’
Since the lie in this answer was so obvious, it seemed safe to believe everything else was the truth.
I had a lot on my mind.
‘Did I know that guy in my previous life?’
It suddenly occurred to me that Raeyan might be a reincarnated person, like me.
What if the life of my past life that I believe is “reality” is a “dream” for that man, and the life I am living now, which I believe is “in the novel”, is “reality” to that man?
Depending on which life you focus on, your previous life can be a dream or vice versa.
I slowly recalled the faces of the people I knew as Yoon Ga-eul.
But there was no one who came to mind that made me think, ‘Yep, that is this person.’
I stifled the urge to hold my head and groan.
“What did Yoon Ga-eul in the dream call you?” I asked him, hoping to reverse engineer an answer.
“I was always just looking at you.”
(T/N: That doesn’t sound creepy at all…nope xD )
“Not once did I ever see you?”
Instead of answering, the man kept silent and averted his gaze. He seemed to avoid answering because he knew he was not good at lying.
‘Looks like a bad question.’
Whatever this man’s intent in approaching me was, I didn’t think it would pose a threat. If that would be the case, he would have let me die when I fell from the cliff.
Then did he want something from me?
Whatever it was, it was a matter for me to find out calmly from now on.
First of all, I had to sort out the situation I was in now.
Carlot and I were attacked while we were traveling. What happened after that?
Honestly, if I fell off a cliff from that height, he wouldn’t think that I was alive.
Would he be searching under the assumption that I’m alive in that situation?
‘….No.’
I laughed bitterly.
I was convinced that he might not even search for me, even if I was dead.
Rather, he might think that it was fortunate that the illegitimate child, a thorn in the family’s eye, died on her own.
Especially since the last one I saw was Carlot. There was even a possibility that he was covering up the crash site.
Because it was Carlot who hated me the most among the members of the Perdia family.
‘Well, this might be an opportunity.’
If I became a dead person like this, it would not matter if I suddenly ran away.
Things worked out for me in the end, except for the fact that I was broke.
Considering the original work, there would be no need to worry about dying if I was outside the Perdia’s mansion, the background of my death scene. And I had somehow wound up outside the mansion a lot earlier than intended.
Accounting for that, whether my sister would be adopted or not had nothing to do with me.
But why?
Why does it feel like there is a hole in my chest?
I looked silently at the face of the man who had begun to apply medicine to my other arm while I was lost in thought.
His skin without any blemishes, long eyelashes hanging over his red eyes, and a look that naturally draws attention.
I asked Raeyan, suppressing the urge to touch his soft-looking black hair.
“By the way, where are we?”
“This is where I live.”
This simple bedroom was where this guy lives.
“Was there anyone else on the cliff where I fell from?”
I fell right after the last assassin was dealt with, so Carlot should be safe, but I couldn’t rule out the possibility that there was another assassin, who hadn’t appeared before, that had shown up.
The man’s hand, which was wrapping a bandage over a fairly deep wound, slowed down.
“I don’t know the situation at the top of the cliff, but….” He began.
“But?”
“It looks like there’s a massive search going on in Perdia.”
“….search?”
I was surprised because Perdia was a family that wouldn’t do that at all.
I can’t believe they’re conducting a search. Even at the level of family members….?
There was no way the knights would move to find only me. I came up with another assumption.
“Did another boy fall too? A guy with curly red hair…..”
Assuming that Carlot fell off afterwards, Perdia would start a search to find him.
But overshadowing my speculation, Raeyan replied firmly.
“No.”
“……Are you sure they are looking for me?”
I was in a daze. I felt like I was still in a dream because this turn of events made no sense with reality.
What was even more surprising were Raeyan’s words that followed.
“Yes. Half a day has passed since you fell off the cliff.”
It had even been half a day.
Nevertheless, it was surprising that the search was still underway, and I thought again.
Although they say they’re searching, there was no chance of survival if you fell off that cliff.
They must be searching to find a corpse.
In this way, I could be forgotten by people as an unlucky princess who fell down a cliff and died.
If I completely disappear, I will be able to live the peaceful life I wished for.
But…..
“ I’ve always watched you.”
“ Well done, Elodie.”
“Isn’t it a reward for a father to praise his daughter?”
Now, the voice of the Duke of Perdia came to mind.
I smiled at Raeyan as he reached out to heal the scratch on my face.
“Thank you for saving me. Raeyan.”
Pause. Raeyan’s hand stopped in the air.
Soon, he answered with a rather grave face, withdrawing his hand.
“No.”
Raeyan slightly twisted his head as if it was burdensome to make eye contact with me.
I took one look at my body, which still had an abundance of unmedicated wounds, and got out of bed.
“I have to go back.”
I kept reasoning to myself that I had to go back.
‘I cant afford to be broke.’
It was a hard world for a penniless woman to survive in. Moreover, I don’t have the means to protect myself enough.
In addition, I couldn’t disappear like this because the effort I had made until now would be a waste.
Even if you run away when you want to run away, you have to earn a house first and then run.
***
The news of Elodie Perdia’s disappearance soon reached the ears of the family servants.
The butler tried to keep their mouths shut as much as possible, but he couldn’t stop the noisy gossip. The news of her disappearance spread out of control.
Meanwhile, in Duke Perdia’s office….
After half a day of searching with little progress, the Duke first returned to the mansion and listened to Jansi’s report.
“I searched all the nearby villages, but there was no testimony that someone saw a person that looked like Lili.”
“…. Okay.”
“I will continue the search just in case.”
Instead of answering, the Duke wiped his tired face and nodded roughly.
Carlot had been searching for Elodie near the scene at the cliff after roughly treating his injuries.
The Duke called for Garon, the knight commander, who was in charge of commanding the search party.”
“Garon.”
“Yes, Your Excellency the Duke.”
“Did you find out who was behind the attack?”
All the bodies of the assassins Carlot had killed were brought to the Perdia mansion to be examined.
Garon’s report on them followed.
“Since even Master Carlot had struggled, it seems to be a group of talented people.”
“Next.”
“Judging from the fact that indicators of a group or organization were not found on the weapons they used, nor any marks left on their bodies or clothes, it is presumed that the person behind it would be in trouble if his identity is revealed.”
“Looks like a lot of cowardly guys.”
Jansi dared to add a word to the Duke’s acrimonious comment.
“It’s usually called a cautious personality.”
“What are you talking about?”
The Duke gave a cold reply and looked at Garon again.
“As a result of the investigation we have found nothing about the background. However, Master Carlot said that they seemed to be aiming for Lady Elodie.”
“…..Elodie?”
“Yes. The young master got out of the carriage and showed himself, but they tried to attack the carriage.”
When Elodie’s name came up again, the atmosphere sank even more somberly.
Jansi, who always smiled leisurely, also kept his seat with a smileless face.
Garon sighed and said lamentably, “It’s unfortunate, If there was at least one living guy, we might be able to figure out something.”
“……Rather than that, finding Elodie comes first. I’ll go back to the scene.”
As soon as the Duke’s words were over, Gaylan and Jansi were about to rise from their seats.
Bang!
Suddenly the door opened violently, and a servant shouted loudly, “Ah, sirs, the Lady is back!”
He dared to invade the family’s head office, but no one pointed it out.
Because immediately after hearing that shout, the Duke and Jansi rushed out of the office at the same time.
What was waiting for them outside the main mansion was Elodie, who came back with a lot of scratches here and there.
“Li-!”
Jansi, who was striding relentlessly towards Elodie, lost to the Duke who overtook him.
“Elodie.”
As the Duke approached and stood in front of Elodie, she hesitated and raised her head.
“I’m sorry for causing a commotion.”
The Duke ignored her comment completely and just said, “Body.”
“It’s okay, except for a few scratches.”
Elodie smiled bravely, but she couldn’t escape Duke of Perdia’s sharp eyes.
Seeing her covered in bandages and full of wounds, his intent to kill was instantly raised.
“……Father?”
In the aftermath even Elodie trembled, and the Duke, who had regained his senses, placed his hand on Elodie’s shoulder.
“Go in and get treated.”
“Well, but…..”
When the Duke and Elodie were having a conversation, another set of eyes observed them closely.
‘Anyway, you’re back safe and sound, so it’s okay…..’
Elodie’s back was the place where Jansi’s eyes landed.
There was a person who was not yet aware of the fact that Elodie had returned.
Jansi’s eyes crumpled when he saw the face.
“Oh, this person saved me.”
At Elodie’s words, the two men’s eyes turned to the man behind her.
Jansi called his name.
“Ian, the Mercenary King.”
A man who became one of the highest-ranking mercenaries in the Empire.
That man was in front of him.
Jansi, who knew through his tailing that he had contacted Elodie the other day, could not dismiss the situation as just a coincidence.
***
Carlot’s face became terribly distorted as the fruitless search continued.
“Damn it……!”
He searched for hours through untrodden bushes, but to no avail.
He was scratched by a bush, but he didn’t even feel the pain.
He just moved his body like crazy to find only one person.
How long had it been?
The search party that had been searching the area, began to prepare for withdrawal.
Carlot, who had been concentrating on the search, became sharp.
“What are you doing?!”
“I report. There was an order from His Excellency the Duke to withdraw.”
“But I haven’t found any clues yet-!”
Naturally, he thought Elodie, who was missing, was presumed dead and the search was stopped.
Because the father he knew wasn’t a man who would stay.
However, the answer that he heard was one Carlot had never imagined.
“Miss Elodie has returned.”
“………..ah.”
It was something he had longed for.
After hearing the report, Carlot rode his horse like a madman to the Perdia’s mansion.
It was quite a distance, but he arrived in a ridiculous amount of time due to his relentless running.
It was night and the dark had already fallen.
He jumped off his horse and made his way to the annex without hesitation.
The hallway of the annex, where no servants were walking around, was dark and deserted.
As he walked quickly through the corridor, where not even a little bit of human warmth could be felt, Carlot was suddenly frightened without realizing it.
‘What if I misheard it?’
‘What if I went to Elodie’s bedroom like this, and inside there is no one?’
Thinking about that made his body shudder again.
Eventually, Carlot’s footsteps stopped in front of Elodie’s tightly closed door.
Squeak–
The door opened little by little, revealing the interior of her bedroom.
In the well-organized room, only a faint light flickered on the bedside table, and Elodie was sitting on the bed next to it.
Staggering, Carlot approached her.
“…..Why did you let go?”
“Carl?”
“Do you want to die?”
Surprised by his ragged and hoarse voice, Elodie finally looked at him, appearing to check Carlot’s condition.
He knew he was a mess from head to toe.
“Why? Are you disappointed that I didn’t die?”
“…..You!”
When he saw Elodie’s bitter smile, he felt like he was losing his mind.
Carlot couldn’t control his overflowing emotions.
He went to Elodie and hugged her without hesitation, his hands wrapping up and around her back.
“Hey, you, what are you–” Elodie gasped.
“Worried….I was worried about you!”
Drip…drip…
Tears flowed down from Carlot’s eyes. Like an animal that had lost its owner, he sobbed out his pent up emotions and buried his face on her shoulder.
‘Yes, I was worried.’ He finally admitted to himself.
This crazy feeling.
Carlot decided not to deny his feelings anymore.
(E/N: Strongly encourage you to check out the photo for this one if you love when men cry, like I do )