Choi Jeong-Hoon thought that his own mind was going out of whack after talking to this madman.
âIf you swear that youâll go away without a fuss after I call him and he says no then sure, why not.â (Choi Jeong-Hoon)
âWhat, youâll really believe me if I swear it? I didnât think youâd be like that⌠Mister Choi Jeong-Hoon, youâre more innocent than you look, arenât you?â (Alpha)
âŚD*mn it, I wish I could beat the living daylights out of this punkâŚÂ (Choi Jeong-Hoonâs inner monologue)
Choi Jeong-Hoon gnashed his teeth and pulled out his phone. He figured that rather than experiencing a verbal wrestling match with this punk here, he might as well call Yi Ji-Hyuk as soon as possible and bring about an end to this whole situation.
In the corner of his mind, he was acutely aware of his survival being dependent on the result of the call itself, but even then, he had absolutely no desire to extend this strange confrontation any longer than it had to.
If he was fated to die, then so be it.
He didnât want to pathetically limp on in this conversation just because of the looming threat of death.
After confirming Yi Ji-Hyukâs number on the screen, Choi Jeong-Hoon tapped on the âcallâ icon then put the phone on speaker.
The ring tone only went on for a couple of times before the call got through.
â âHello?â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
âMister Yi Ji-Hyuk!â (Choi Jeong-Hoon)
â âPlease hurry up. Iâm in the middle of han-ta.â [1] (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
ââŚGimme a break, that d*mn game.â (Choi Jeong-Hoon)
Before Choi Jeong-Hoon could say something else, though, Alpha shouted out first.
âWowsers, this is too much, you know?! You never answered my call, though!â (Alpha)
â âWhat the hell? Who was that?â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Choi Jeong-Hoon shot a glare at Alpha with eyes reserved for looking at a madman, but the latter replied rather nonchalantly.
âItâs Alpha. How are you doing?â (Alpha)
â âAlpha?â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
â âOh, uh, so⌠That wacko?â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Choi Jeong-Hoon snorted in an uncontrollable laughter and hurriedly grabbed the steering wheel.
âYes, a cider!â (Choi Jeong-Hoon)
It felt like all of his stress accumulated from dealing with Alpha got vented out in an instant.
âThatâs a bit too harsh, donât you think? I mean, I came all the way to Korea just to have an audience with you.â (Alpha)
â âWhy didnât you come to my place, then?â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
âYou know why. The security cordon around you is water-tight and if I get found out, all those ability users lounging around in the NDF office with nothing better to do would pounce on me in frenzied excitement or something.â (Alpha)
â âOkay, whatever man. Get to the point, will ya. Iâm in the middle of han-ta, okay!â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Alpha formed a somewhat serious expression and looked over to Choi Jeong-Hoon.
âWhat exactly is this han-ta thing?â (Alpha)
âŚWell, that stupid game can be helpful sometimes, eh? (Choi Jeong-Hoonâs inner monologue)
Choi Jeong-Hoon smiled meaningfully in silence, causing Alphaâs confusion to get even deeper.
â âAh, bloody hell?! I died!â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
ââŚIâm not sure what youâre talking about right now. It seems that my Korean is still a bit lacking.â (Alpha)
â âOkay so. What do you want?â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Alpha spoke up cautiously.
âIâd like to meet and chat to you in person. But Mister Choi Jeong-Hoon doesnât want to arrange the meeting.â (Alpha)
âYou crazy?! Why would I take you there?!â (Choi Jeong-Hoon)
Choi Jeong-Hoon roared out in anger, but Yi Ji-Hyuk was quite ruthless when it came to reaching the conclusion.
â âThen come to my house.â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
âEh?â (Choi Jeong-Hoon)
The one to reply in stupor wasnât Alpha but Choi Jeong-Hoon.
â âSeeing his face at least once is nothing major to begin with, anyway. Just bring him along.â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
âHulâŚâ (Choi Jeong-Hoon)
Choi Jeong-Hoon saw Alphaâs triumphant âSee, I told you soâ expression and felt this inexplicable sense of defeat.
âUrgh.â (Choi Jeong-Hoon)
Alpha might be one thing, but Yi Ji-Hyuk too wasnât right in the head, thatâs for sure.
âIâm really going to take him to your house, okay?â (Choi Jeong-Hoon)
â âAh, wait. Tell that punk to bring me a present first. Itâs his first visit and all.â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Hey, you insane fool, thatâs not really important right now, is it?! (Choi Jeong-Hoonâs inner monologue)
â âOh, I respawned. Iâm hanging up now.â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
The call came to an unceremonious end and Choi Jeong-Hoon wordlessly stared at the phoneâs screen.
Alpha looked at him for a second or two, before smirking deeply.
âShould I drive?â (Alpha)
ââŚNo, I will.â (Choi Jeong-Hoon)
Choi Jeong-Hoon, his eyes blazing rather furiously, stomped on the accelerator.
Fine, fine! Letâs all die together today! (Choi Jeong-Hoonâs inner monologue)
âNow thatâs a nice house, alright.â (Alpha)
ââŚâ (Choi Jeong-Hoon)
âKeuh~, As I thought, having you around makes things so much easier, Mister Choi Jeong-Hoon. Who knew we wouldnât get stopped once in the checkpoints! If it was me alone, Iâd have to break through several layers of security networks.â (Alpha)
âBut you would have broken through them no problem, right?â (Alpha)
âWell, yeah. Thatâs true. But if I break through like that and try to sneak into Mister Yi Ji-Hyukâs house, then I might have ended up getting killed and sent to hell, you know? They say an old lion is still a lion, so if that guy sneezes in my directions, someone as weak as me might get all of his bones shattered or something.â (Alpha)
âItâd be wonderful if that happened for real.â (Choi Jeong-Hoon)
Choi Jeong-Hoon spat out a lengthy groan then pressed the doorbell. The front gate promptly opened so he stepped inside.
Oh-Sik greeted him first.
ââŚWhere is Mister Turtle?â (Choi Jeong-Hoon)
Oh-Sik pointed towards his doghouse. Choi Jeong-Hoon spotted a turtle lying spread-eagled and snoring in the middle of the day and spat out yet another groan.
âWhat the heck. This isnât even a petting zoo, so whyâŚâ (Choi Jeong-Hoon)
At this rate, more stress would accumulate if he wasnât careful.
He shook his head and approached the front door. After opening it, he stepped inside.
âEiii, d*mn it!â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
He was greeted by the familiar yells of defeat as he walked towards Yi Ji-Hyukâs room.
âThese b*stards, how can they be playing games when the whole world is in this state?!â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
What about you, you d*mn fool! (Choi Jeong-Hoonâs inner monologue)
Choi Jeong-Hoon really, really had a ton of things heâd like to get off his chest but for the time being, he had to desperately rein them all in.
âItâs been a while. Good to see you again.â (Alpha)
Alpha smiled brightly and greeted Yi Ji-Hyuk.
The latter stared at him with a clearly-pouting face, then opened his mouth unhappily.
âAnd whereâs my present?â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
âThis is the country of courteous people, isnât it. Of course I had one prepared beforehand.â (Alpha)
Alpha brought forward the hidden shopping bag from his behind and pushed it towards Yi Ji-Hyuk.
âWhatâs this?â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
âTracksuits.â (Alpha)
Choi Jeong-Hoon stared at the tracksuits currently on Yi Ji-Hyukâs body, then shifted his head over to Alpha next.
âIs this the case of him having good sense or not having any senses whatsoever?â (Choi Jeong-Hoon)
So, so bloody confusing, indeed.
âWhenever I saw you, you were always wearing that particular style of tracksuits, so I decided to buy something similar.â (Alpha)
Yi Ji-Hyuk frowned deeply.
âI have over dozen same tracksuit sets already, but you actually got me the exact same thing, too?â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
âOf course not! These bad boys are not the same.â (Alpha)
âHow so?â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Alpha walked up to Yi Ji-Hyuk and whispered quietly.
âThese are made in America. Imported from overseas, no less.â (Alpha)
Yi Ji-Hyuk gladly accepted the present with an elated grin on his face.
âPlease stop it, you insane b*stards.â (Choi Jeong-Hoon)
Choi Jeong-Hoon found it very strange that even though Alpha and Yi Ji-Hyuk had ended up in one room together, there hadnât been any world-ending Big Bangs so far.
How commendable, our world. Youâre enduring so well!
Seeing how Yi Ji-Hyuk was reacting as if he had ran into an old friend, Choi Jeong-Hoon couldnât help but fall even deeper into a pit of confusion.
This guy, did he already forget that he nearly died from Alpha stabbing him in the back with a knife?
Well, a hand blade is still technically a knife, soâŚÂ (Choi Jeong-Hoonâs inner monologue)
âWhy, thank you.â (Alpha)
Yi Ji-Hyuk opened the refrigerator, took out a bottle of juice and placed it on the living roomâs coffee table. He then even brought cups out on a tray, too.
âWow, what a wonderful hospitality this is. To think there would come a day that Mister Yi Ji-Hyuk is pouring me a drink.â (Alpha)
âIâm rather well-cultured, you see.â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Choi Jeong-Hoon was working extra hard to stop his urge of wanting to cover up his ears from taking over him. He no longer cared about the results. He just wanted to see the end to this horrible situation as soon as humanly possible.
âOkay, soâŚâ (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
After finishing pouring the drinks in the cups, Yi Ji-Hyuk leaned against the couch and stared at Alpha.
âWhat now?â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
A question straight to the point.
Alpha scratched his head, then replied with a smile.
âWe arenât going to exchange any pleasantries, but straight into business?â (Alpha)
âYou look fine to me, so what?â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
âWell, yeah. You got a point there.â (Alpha)
âI need to get back to my gaming session soon, so if youâve got something to say, hurry up and say it, then get lost.â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
ââŚSounds like youâre rather unhappy with me.â (Alpha)
Yi Ji-Hyuk shrugged his shoulders.
âActually, Iâve gone through quite a lot of things in life before, so I donât feel much of anything towards you. Itâs just that Iâm not a fan of wasting my time on useless stuff.â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Yi Ji-Hyukâs reply caused an expression of uncertainty to float up on Alphaâs face.
âShould I label this as you being dauntless or somethingâŚ? Honestly, I was expecting to get beaten up by you after arriving here, you know.â (Alpha)
âIf you keep beating around the bush and annoy me, I think I can meet your expectation.â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
âEh? That wonât do.â (Alpha)
Alpha quietly stared at Yi Ji-Hyuk before carrying on.
âHow about joining hands with me?â (Alpha)
Yi Ji-Hyuk dug into his ear canals.
âWhy are you telling someone as busy as me this dogsh*t? Get lost.â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
He then got up from the couch, his expression clearly implying that he wasted time for no good reason. Alpha hurriedly got up as well and began clinging onto Yi Ji-Hyukâs arm.
âW-wait a minute! Hang on! Please, at least listen to what I have to say first!â (Alpha)
âLet me go! I said, let go! Didnât your mother teach you not to spew dogsh*t in peopleâs faces?!â [2] (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
âIâm telling you, I have a plan! A way to get out of this mess! Iâm sure you donât believe me now but once you listen to me, even youâd end up slapping your thigh and go, why didnât I think of it before. I swear!â (Alpha)
âYou better let go before I slap you instead.â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
âItâs okay if you want to slap me around. But Iâm being honest that I do have a plan. At this rate, humanity will die without being able to do anything, wouldnât you agree? Iâm not the type to sit back and watch such a thing happen.â (Alpha)
âYou caused this whole thing in the first place, you d*mn insane b*stard!â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
âThat was all a part of my plan. Do I look like someone capable of doing something like that without a plan?â (Alpha)
âYup, you do.â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
âP-please, donât be like thatâŚâ (Alpha)
Alpha began pleading for real now.
âYouâre my lone hope now, Mister Yi Ji-Hyuk. Donât you want to try your best for the sake of humanity with us?â (Alpha)
âHoly cow⌠Itâs really been a long time since I last heard bullsh*t of this calibre.â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Choi Jeong-Hoon was wholeheartedly agreeing with Yi Ji-Hyukâs opinion.
If it was any other person, sure, why not. But how could Alpha even mouth such things so shamelessly?!
Even if every single person on the planet was asked to shout out âWorld Peace!â, Alpha shouldnât be one of them.
âWhat a shameless b*stard.â (Choi Jeong-Hoon)
Yi Ji-Hyuk nodded in agreement at Choi Jeong-Hoonâs utterance.
âHey, man. Letâs be real here. You belong to the axis of evil, donât you? Almost all the crap thatâs been happening lately is your handiwork, isnât it?â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
âThatâs a misunderstanding.â (Alpha)
âWhich part is?â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
ââŚIâm not a part of this axis of evil or whatever. Although youâre correct about recent events being âmostlyâ my handiwork.â (Alpha)
Alpha replied with a refreshing grin, causing Yi Ji-Hyuk to hug his head.
âYou can never figure out what a human being is, no matter how deep you dig in. I mean seriously, an insane b*stard like this is also a human too, so how can anyone figure anything out?â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Choi Jeong-Hoon was inwardly feeling this subtle emotion.
âThatâs exactly how I feel.â (Choi Jeong-Hoon)
One could only pray that through this meeting, Yi Ji-Hyuk finally gets to understand at least one-tenth of the torture he had put other people through.
âOkay, soâŚâ (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Yi Ji-Hyuk, looking somewhat hollow, stared at Alpha.
âAll the crap youâve done is indeed your fault, but you have a good reason for doing so? Is that it?â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
âSo, itâs your fault that the doorway to the demon world opened up, but you didnât do it because you wanted everyone to die together with you. No, you thought that itâd actually help out humanity, instead.â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
âYouâre absolutely on point yet again. As expected of you, Mister Yi Ji-Hyuk.â (Alpha)
Yi Ji-Hyuk reached out and grabbed the cup of juice meant for Alpha, then gulped down the cold liquid contained within in one go.
ââŚBut, uh, that was mineâŚâ (Alpha)
âGot none for you, you b*stard.â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Yi Ji-Hyuk roughly scratched his head then shot a glare at Alpha.
âWhat a fresh and never-before-heard dogsh*t this is. Okay, fine. Letâs say your bullcrap is for real. Even if what you said is real, thatâs still not a good enough reason for me to cooperate with you, now is it? Wouldnât you agree?â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
âBut, how about you do it for the sake of world peace?â (Alpha)
âPeace, my foot!â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
âAh, my bad! My Korean is still not that great, you see. Rather than peace, itâs survival. Our survival! If you and I combine our strengths, we can easily drive out the demon worldâs denizens. Things might get harder if more time is wasted but since the Gates have opened sooner than expected, we still have more than enough leeway, donât we? If you agree to go along with my plan, then the odds are still favourable for us.â (Alpha)
ââŚYour plan?â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
âYes. And itâs a foolproof plan, too. I told you this before already, right? Youâll be so shocked and moved after learning about it.â (Alpha)
Yi Ji-Hyuk powerlessly nodded his head.
He had already heard a lot of crap by now, so there was no reason to not listen a bit more. Wait, he might start bleeding from his ears if he heard more of this nonsense but then again, he was somewhat curious about what this insane b*stard would say next.
âOkay, fine. Whatâs your plan, then?â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Alpha grinned brightly, then brought a finger to his lips.
âNo, he wouldnâtâŚâ (Choi Jeong-Hoon)
âItâs a secret.â (Alpha)
Yi Ji-Hyuk grinned brightly as well.
Alpha maintained his smile while looking back at him.
âGet the hell out, you insane b*stard!â (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
A cushion Yi Ji-Hyuk threw at Alpha struck the latter in the head and bounced up towards the ceiling.
< 416. Been a while -1 > Fin.
(TL: âHan-taâ in [1] is a Korean slang term usually associated with MOBAs like AOS and LOL. Itâs basically a Korean shorthand for âteam fightâ.
(TL: In [2], the OG text was âHow dare you spew dogsh*t after eating expensive food!â but I changed it since it didnât make much sense to me personally.)
(TL: Finally, no Staind jokes, pls.)