I blinked several times to confirm that this wasn't a lucid dream.
Marie had taken my hand. It seemed to be a mere misunderstanding at first. But after I let go, she placed her hand on mine again.
Along with the words, "I like you."
... I began to doubt if I had misunderstood something after I hugged her. If so, it would be terrible; Marie might withdraw again. I had to avoid that.
Still, I couldn't let go.
Of course not. I had been yearning for this moment, burning with anticipation for so long. I couldn't let go of her.
Reluctantly, I asked her,
"If this is a misunderstanding, push me away right now. Otherwise, let's stay like this."
But Marie didn't resist; instead, she pressed her forehead against my chest as if nodding.
A sweet numbness ran through my body. I trembled from my toes to the top of my head and held her even tighter.
— I did it.
I don't know what triggered it, but finally, my feelings had reached Marie. Now, we could finally become true fiancés.
I did it—I did it!
"Marie, Marie, thank you. I love you with all my heart. I'll make you happy!"
She didn't respond, just leaned against me. She wasn't so heavy that I couldn't support her, but the closeness of our bodies increased. I could feel the softness of her body through the thin fabric, the contours, her breath on my earlobe, her body heat, her scent, her heartbeat—everything about Marie. I patted her back gently.
"Marie, you're a bit too close. I'm happy, but it's not good."
But she didn't back away. Instead, she leaned even more, and I became increasingly confused.
"It's not good. I'm happy, but it's not right. You need to consider this, to understand what it means to be a man."
Still, she didn't back away.
W-What...? Could it be that Marie, who is usually so reserved and honest, is actually this proactive when it comes to it!?
My heart was pounding so hard it hurt. While holding Marie, I visualized a map of the entire capital in my mind, picking out places we could rest on the way from the market to Granado Castle. No, the places I use for work are well-known to Count Cyrus Granado. The staff would welcome us with a grand reception, and the shy Marie might run away.
Then, how about the carriage storage... The second floor is a lodging place. If we could get an empty room... But it's a cheap, simple inn with thin walls and no mood or bath.
If Marie really wants it now, I could do something—like buy the entire hotel—but no, that's not right. This should be more... special. So, let's put it off for today. It's better to do it after we get back to the castle. Even a little bit. We can do something in this carriage, can't we?
I looked down at Marie's face cautiously.
... Her eyes were closed.
"Marie... Will you give me permission to kiss you?"
I whispered, releasing my embrace and lifting her chin to bring my lips close. Just before touching, I asked again,
"I want to kiss you. Please give me permission. Please—"
Marie's body swayed.
Huh? Without my support, she collapsed like a puppet with its strings cut, lying down on the carriage floor.
I quickly bent down. Her eyes were still closed, and she was breathing shallowly.
"Could she be... sleeping?"
She didn't respond to my call.
... She seems to be sound asleep.
"No way..."
I slumped, shoulders drooping. I lifted her, cradling her head on my knee and laying her on the bench seat.
She didn't move at all, as if it was just right.
I sighed and muttered,
"Well, it's fine."
... I'm not sure what was a dream and what wasn't... But I don't think the emerald and her holding my hand were part of sleepwalking. There was progress.
Besides, it's fine even if there wasn't.
Marie seemed to have a good day. She must have been exhausted from all the excitement. She shopped with her own wages, didn't shrink back from Prince Ruihong, and enjoyed the conversation.
It's a stroke of luck. The plan to boost Marie's self-esteem seems to be going well. After all, Marie is incredibly cute even without makeup or fancy dresses. It's impossible to call her ugly.
— Ugly, a ragged mess. —
When I realized this, Baron Shaduran's strange behavior made sense.
— A disguise to hide Marie's charm from everyone, including herself.
— To prevent her from being taken by other men...
I, ironically, understand this feeling the most. If I had met Marie in society, I would have fallen in love for sure.
Men are simple creatures; they feel desire just by passing a beautiful woman. It's impossible for a girl to go through school without being approached by boys. The more popular a girl is, the higher her self-esteem. She might think she can marry a better man, that she can have a better life in the city, and run away from home.
This is a common phenomenon that has led to the depopulation of rural areas.
— Marie is capable. It would be a problem if she left home.
— The Shaduran family must have made her look unattractive to keep her tied to the baron's family—
... Thinking about it this way, the flirting might have been a good development. Marie tends to think that compliments from me and the servants are just flattery. This might make her realize she is beautiful.
... Maybe I should even take her to a noble's evening party? Marie would definitely be surrounded by men. She might realize her charm and the unfair treatment at home...
I thought it was a good idea, but I was unconsciously clenching my teeth.
... No, I can't. I don't want to.
I don't want to expose her to other men.
That was my true feeling.
I gripped her shoulder as she slept.
— I told the flirt not to touch a woman's body without permission.
I won't let go, I won't let her escape.
— I said with a gentlemanly face, "You're not my possession."
I don't want anything. I just want her to live happily and joyfully in the castle. I want to see her smile. That's all I need to be happy.
— I said this just a few days ago.
I wasn't lying.
When it becomes a reality, it's never enough.
I love seeing her run around the castle.
But I want to lock her up. In a room filled with cushions and flowers, where only I can enter, I want to lay her on a soft bed, unable to move, and feed her sweet cakes.
That would make me the same as Baron Shaduran, and it's absolutely unacceptable. Marie should see a wider world. Life isn't just about marriage; she needs time outside of me. She should enrich her hobbies and work, make friends with servants and people outside the castle, and even fall in love with other men—
My teeth clicked.
... No, I can't. I can't give her to anyone.
I want her to be my wife, to cherish her like a child.
I don't just want to hold her hand; I want to be with her completely.
I want to worship her like a goddess while treating her like a toy.
I was overwhelmed by my own emotions. I am drowning in this love. My mind is filled with nothing but Marie, Marie, Marie, Marie. I can't breathe—
"... Marie..."
I combed her hair with trembling fingers and caressed her exposed cheek with the pads of my fingers.
I sighed in relief.
I don't need to convince myself; I am happy.
Marie is here with me. That's enough, isn't it?
We hadn't even met two months ago. I had once heard of her death and despaired.
It's enough that she is alive. I don't need anything else—
"... Huh?"
I suddenly felt something was wrong. Marie's face was red. She seemed to be blushing while talking, but it was strange for her to remain flushed even while sleeping.
Her hair, which was on her forehead, was damp with sweat. Her shallow breathing was irregular.
I felt my blood run cold. I pressed my cold hand to her forehead. She was burning hot!
"R—Ruihong! Ruihong!"
I pounded on the door leading to the driver's seat and screamed. My friend poked his head out.
"What's wrong, Cyrus? You sound like you're dying."
"It's Marie who's dying! Stop the carriage! No, hurry to the doctor!"