CH 50

Two men with dark hair and red eyes sat next to me. One would be Caesar, and the other would be Erez, but both were so similar that it was difficult to tell them apart.

“Your Majesty is the master of all men and the ruler of this empire,” said the one sitting on the left.

Oh, this is Erez.

“I will protect Your Majesty so that no one can challenge your authority. I am your sword and your shield.”

Yep, Erez was this kind of guy.

I abdicated the throne to him because I thought I could leave the empire to him.

“But were you really happy with that position?” said the one on the right.

Judging by this cheeky tone, this must be Caesar.

“Did the undisputed power that Erez Gray protected make you happy?”

Happiness.

There was no time when I could afford to think about that.

Ever since I was little, my only goal was to survive. My best was my best for life.

I don’t think I was such a lousy emperor to my people. Wouldn’t that be a good life?

“Erez Gray’s gone.”

Can you say that to your ancestor, Caesar?

“Everyone will ask you to solve something and use your talent for a cause.”

The Caesar in my dream took my hand.

“I’ll protect you. So that no one can interfere with your search for happiness.”

“That is why I came back to you.”

“That’s why I was born into your world.”

Erez’s voice and Caesar’s voice overlapped. The two had similar voices, and it sounded like one person was speaking.

‘A strange dream.’

Erez and Caesar hugged me tightly from both sides.

It was as if two large dogs were whining at their owners for affection, and I patted them on the shoulder.

“Thank you, both of you.”

I spoke to both of them in a soft voice.

***

When I opened my eyes, the sun was already in the middle of the sky.

But even after I opened my eyes, I couldn’t get out of bed.

‘I feel like I’m going to die…’

Even though I thought I slept well, the tiredness did not go away. Also, my body hurt all over the place.

‘I was confident in my stamina. Well, isn’t this a matter of physical strength…?’

Thinking like that, I remembered what had happened last night, and my ears burned.

I buried my face in the pillow and screamed in shame.

“Ahhh! Stop! Don’t think about it! Don’t think about it!”

How embarrassing.

I feel ashamed to death.

Was I out of my mind last night?

Yes, I must be. I wouldn’t have done that if I were sane!

“Crazy, crazy, I was really crazy…!”

I can’t live because my face is burning.

I want to forget quickly…

But the more I tried to forget, the more vividly it came to mind.

Caesar’s hands that gently touched me, the strong arms that embraced me as I collapsed, the heated eyes, his furrowed brows, the shaded spot of the sweaty muscles…

… Aaahhh, stop it! Stop thinking!

“What am I reflecting on like a pervert? I’m—!”

The heat on my face wouldn’t go away. Every part of the body that Caesar’s hands had touched felt like it was burning.

“The aftereffects… I didn’t expect it to be like this…”

With my face buried in the pillow, I heaved a long sigh.

‘Well, it wasn’t all bad. No, it wasn’t bad, it’s rather good…’

Apart from being embarrassed, it was good.

Caesar’s expression, voice, and body shape, which I had never seen before, were all unfamiliar and enjoyable.

This is probably why everyone wants to fall in love.

‘Love…’

Mm, there’s no room for shame.

I tucked the blanket over my head.

***

Not long after, Agoth entered the bedroom.

“My lady, are you awake?”

“Mmm… I’m awake.”

I muttered as I lay down on the blanket without even thinking of stroking my scruffy hair. At my hazy voice, Agoth looked worried.

“Are you okay? I think your voice is hoarse. Do you have a cold?”

“Huh? No, this is… uhh, I shouted too much while fighting yesterday.”

Cough, cough. I coughed in vain.

“I didn’t wake you up on purpose because you were completely asleep when I came in the morning.”

“I see. Well done. In fact, I’m still tired.”

I couldn’t help but be tired. Aside from working hard all night last night, I barely fell asleep after watching the east dawning dimly.

“Well, you must have been exhausted from dealing with the members yesterday.”

“Yes… Right…”

It’s hard not to tell the truth.

I felt sorry that I unintentionally lied to Agoth.

“What should we do? Would you like some more rest?”

“Well, what should I do?”

“Are you hungry? Shall I prepare a simple breakfast and bring it to your room?”

“That would be good. Please, Agoth.”

“Yes, then please wait a little bit.”

Agoth’s expression brightened as soon as she thought she was being helpful.

However, Agoth did not have to go down to the dining room.

As Agoth was about to leave the room, Caesar appeared with a tray of prepared meals in one hand.

“Ugh!”

As soon as Agoth saw Caesar, she frowned. Caesar did not lose and clicked his tongue towards Agoth.

“Shouldn’t we see each other with a smile?”

“Shouldn’t we stop clicking our tongues?”

Umm, the two were growling again. Now it felt strange if those two didn’t growl.

What do you call that kind of relationship? Dragon and tiger?

‘No, it’s a dog and a cat.’

In that they both only growl and never raise their nails or expose their fangs.

“What are you thinking?”

As I contemplated an appropriate example, Caesar, who had sent Agoth away, came and sat beside me.

The tray he brought contained bread, butter, potato soup, honey, juice, and a fresh salad.

I asked, glaring at Caesar with a bit of resentment for my tired body.

“What is that?”

“Breakfast. I thought you must be sleeping in.”

“It’s because of someone.”

“Yeah, so I’m here. Don’t worry. I’ll feed you so you won’t have to lift a hand.”

Caesar smiled as he ruffled my messy hair. Somehow it felt like being treated like a baby, so I wanted to be a little childish.

I sat down, and Caesar pulled himself a little further towards me.

“What do you want to eat first?”

“First of all, juice.”

At my command, not my request, Caesar immediately put a glass of juice in front of me and brought it to me.

I took the glass with both hands and moistened my dry lips.

“Fuah… I think I will live.”

“Your voice is completely silenced, Helena.”

“It’s because of you.”

“Yes, that’s right. So please punish this sinner to your heart’s content, Master.”

Caesar said playfully and began to dab some honey on the bread.

The sweet smell made me feel better somehow. Only then did I hear a rumbling sound in my stomach.

“Now, ah—”

Caesar said, sticking out the bread toward me. I bit at the bread Caesar had offered me with a sleepy face.

Munch. Hmm. The bread is warm, and the honey is sweet and delicious.

‘Come to think of it. I think I had a dream related to Caesar.’

I couldn’t remember what the dream was about when I woke up.

“Would you like some salad?”

“Yes, please.”

I opened my mouth and eagerly ate the food Caesar gave me, like a baby bird taking food from its mother.

Well, I don’t think it’s a bad idea to be a little sick with this kind of treatment.

“Would you like some soup?”

“Yes, yes.”

I’m in trouble. It’s so comfortable that I’m going to get used to it.

Caesar was very meticulous in handling my meals. To the extent that I wonder how a person who would have been served his whole life could be so good at this.

“Oh, I spilled it.”

But I was not used to being treated like this.

Eventually, as I took a bite of the bread Caesar offered, the honey from the bread dripped.

“The sheet’s all dirty. I’m going to get in trouble.”

“Um, is that so?”

Caesar answered with a smirk and licked the honey on his finger with his tongue.

… Wow, why does that look so sensational?

‘Have some lewd demons caught on the filter in my head since yesterday?’

Eventually, I looked away from Caesar. Why do I feel like my arrhythmia is getting worse these days?

“Helena.”

“Mm?”

Caesar called my name, and I unconsciously turned my head back.

And I was startled by the darkened vision. The face of Caesar, who had been so far away, was approaching my nose.

‘Mm?’

What is this? And while I was stiff, Caesar gently grabbed my shoulder.

A wake-up morning kiss… No, it wasn’t.

He bit my left cheek.

“Hmmm?!”

What did just happen to me?

Did I get eaten?!

Caesar soon pulled himself away from me. His smirk was a bit mischievous.

Caesar licked his upper lip with his tongue, narrowed his eyes, and laughed.

“Because it’s got honey on it.”

“Then you should’ve said it!”

“Helena is sweet. Is it because she eats a lot of sweets? I hate sweets, but Helena is delicious.”

“But you’re not supposed to eat me?”

I’m having a hard time because of someone, but he looks so excited for nothing!

Eventually, I bit Caesar’s finger. Caesar screamed in pain.

The corners of his mouth were up even though he said it hurt.

***

A week later, the camp was over.

Since the Red Knights were the last order in the Knights’ camp, the stewards of the mansion began to put a white cloth on the furniture again while we were preparing to leave.

“Oh, you are still there.”

One of the maids appeared in my bedroom, whimpering and carrying a large white cloth. But when she found me still standing by the window, she was visibly embarrassed.

Most members were carrying their luggage outside, so she must have thought I was out, too.

“I’m terribly sorry. I’ll be back later.”

The maid nodded her head as she blushed.

I beckoned the maid, who was about to leave the room again.

“No, come in. Come and do what you were about to do.”

“But…”

“It’s okay. It’s cumbersome to go back and forth with that.”

The maid looked touched by my consideration. This was enough to make her thrilled.

The maid cleaned the room with her deft skill. She wiped the furniture, dusted it, and put a white cloth over it.

I leaned against the window, watched her, suddenly bored, and tried to start a conversation.

“You’re good on your own.”

“At first, I couldn’t do it alone. I’m used to it now.”

“Have you worked in this mansion for a long time?”

“I come when the butler calls in summer and winter.”

So she’s not an exclusive maid.

The maid talked to me but didn’t rest her hand for a moment.

“Still, it’s already been five years this year.”

“Wow, it’s been a while.”

“If the butler keeps calling me, I want to serve this mansion until I die.”

“Why?”

“Because I like it. It is beautiful.”

The maid answered my words with a happy expression on her face.

I looked over the window. In the distance, the surface of the seashore was glistening like powder in the summer sunlight.

“Yes, it is. It is beautiful.”

Where my beautiful people used to be.

Okay.

I love this old mansion too.

“This year, I think it was more fun and friendly because Princess came.”

The maid said shyly to me. I gave that maid a big smile.

“I’m sorry I spilled honey on the sheets a few days ago.”

“Don’t mention it. Please come again next year. Until then, I will keep this room clean.”

There was the sound of footsteps running from afar. With that light, bouncy sound alone, I knew it was Agoth.

Sure enough, Agoth appeared in front of the opened door.

“My lady. We’ve loaded the carriage! There is also a carriage waiting for you.”

“I see. Good job, Agoth.”

It’s time to leave.

I left the room at Agoth’s urging. The maid bowed to me.

Before crossing the door’s threshold, I paused and looked back at the room where I had stayed.

I have stayed in this mansion and this room dozens of times in my previous life. I saw a shining star in the corner of the seaside cave.

I want to tell myself back then that it was such a beautiful place.

“I look forward to your continued support.”

I asked the maid.

“This is the mansion I love.”

I can say that now.

What connection is. What love is. I think I’ll be able to figure them out, at least vaguely now.

Finally, I left the room with the maid smiling proudly at me.