Chapter 28: Brush Away Fallen Flowers

“Willing to brush away the dust and snow for you, willing to accompany you for half a lifetime.”

Having known Pei Wenxuan for many years, Li Rong knew Pei Wenxuan’s abilities very well.

When he wanted to oppose you, he could anger you to death. However, if he wanted to deliberately please someone, his ability to flatter was beyond the comprehension of ordinary people.

After all, Pei Wenxuan was also the son of an influential aristocratic family. He had always been extraordinarily brilliant. It was said that he was practically at the top of every subject at the academy back then, a brilliant and exceptional gentleman that excelled in all six arts. If he wanted to coax a girl, it was easily within his grasp.

When Li Rong saw what he had written, she felt her worries being eased away. A moment later, Pei Wenxuan saw a piece of paper wrapped around a rock thrown over from next door. Pei Wenxuan was stunned. He never thought that Li Rong would respond to the letter, so he hurried to pick up the rock, squat down and open it up to take a look. Li Rong’s beautiful handwriting appeared, bearing some of her strong and sharp character:

You seem to know how to talk, so say some more.

Pei Wenxuan looked at these words and almost immediately thought of Li Rong raising her eyebrows and smiling as she said this. He didn’t know why, but Li Rong’s proud and arrogant expression unexpectedly turned out to be a little cute.

It was like a cat raising its tail, proud yet simultaneously capturing people’s hearts.

The thought to tease her emerged in Pei Wenxuan’s heart. After a few moments, Li Rong received a reply. Pei Wenxuan put his hand out and directly passed the note over. Li Rong hurriedly picked it up, opened it and found that it was still a painting, though this painting was much simpler and had fewer strokes. He only sketched the outline of an earthen jar with the words “the peony” written on it and the four words “the peony over time” in the empty space next to it.

Seeing these four words, Li Rong immediately crumpled the piece of paper into a ball and threw it out, no longer accepting any of this dog’s things.

Seeing Li Rong throw the crumpled note out, Pei Wenxuan knew that Li Rong must be angry. He hastily said: “Hey, hey, don’t be angry, Your Highness. It was just a joke.”

“People can’t talk to dogs,” Li Rong coldly said, “Stop barking!”

What Li Rong said made Pei Wenxuan choke on his words, but he also knew that Li Rong was furious. He hurriedly wrote a few poems praising Li Rong’s beauty and reached out to pass them over, whispering: “Princess, Princess, won’t you take a look?”

Li Rong didn’t bother to respond to him, cracking melon seeds as she read her novel. Pei Wenxuan’s arm was sore, so he switched over to his other arm and continued to wave the piece of paper in his hand: “Princess, I was wrong. Let me offer you an apology. I won’t tease you anymore, so take a look, won’t you?”

As soon as Li Rong looked up, she caught sight of the white piece of paper dangling outside, then lowered her head and looked down at her novel again. Pei Wenxuan changed his tone of voice and called out to her: “Princess? Your Highness? Li Rong……”

Before he could finish his sentence, voices came from outside as well as some footsteps. Pei Wenxuan immediately stood up and leaned against the wall. Just as he straightened out his clothes, he saw a young man in crimson official robes coming down the long hallway.

He seemed to have arrived in a hurry as there were still some fine beads of sweat on his forehead. His eyes fell on Li Rong as soon as he came into the prison. Seeing that Li Rong was still doing well, he immediately let out a sigh of relief and turned to face Li Rong to pay his respects: “Your Highness.”

Li Rong was slightly taken aback. She looked at the person who just arrived and asked, partly in confusion, “Su daren?”

Su Rongqing straightened up after ceremonially saluting her and nodded in Pei Wenxuan’s direction: “Pei daren.”

Pei Wenxuan nodded neither spite nor indifference. Li Rong saw there was sweat on Su Rongqing’s head. She couldn’t help but laugh: “Why is Su daren in such a hurry? Wipe away the sweat first.”

As she spoke, she held out a handkerchief. Su Rongqing looked at the handkerchief that Li Rong was holding out. He hesitated for a moment, and before Li Rong could react, he immediately reached out and respectfully accepted the handkerchief Li Rong offered with both hands: “Thank you, Your Highness.”

Su Rongqing took the handkerchief and lightly wiped his forehead. Pei Wenxuan leaned against the wall and quietly watched. He rolled up the piece of paper in his hand from earlier and repeatedly knocked it against his shoulder.

Su Rongqing wiped his forehead as he allowed himself to catch his breath, then he said, “Having rushed a bit on a road, this humble official hopes Your Highness will not laugh.”

“Why did you need to come in such a hurry?”

Li Rong chuckled. Su Rongqing respectfully said: “After learning that something happened to Your Highness today, this humble official wanted to rush over but was summoned by His Majesty. Once this humble official was able to leave the Palace, this one rushed over in fear that Your Highness might encounter difficulties in prison.”

Su Rongqing had always spoken smoothly and steadily. There was none of Pei Wenxuan’s sonorous intonation in his tone of voice. Each and every one of his moves seemed to have been measured with a ruler, even his tone of voice. Li Rong listened to what he said, then asked, “How was the morning court?”

“News arrived from the border during the morning court today,” Su Rongqing looked solemn. “Two days ago, the Rong State attacked a city, and the defender of the city walls, Commander Zhao Yi, died on the front lines. At this moment, the entire war front and all troops have retreated to the township of Fen. The Yang family even submitted a letter of resignation last time.”

“Resignation?”

Li Rong laughed: “What did you say?”

Su Rongqing’s expression didn’t look too good, but he repeated it, relaying everything that had happened: “Yang Ming said that Yang Quan committed an unforgivable crime and provoked the Princess. The Yang family has no face left to face the imperial family, so he asked to retire and return to their hometown, saying that he would bring the Yang family children back to the mountains and forests in hopes that Your Highness will leave them a way out.”

“Condemning words.”

Pei Wenxuan quietly uttered. Li Rong tapped the palm of her hand with her fan.

If the Yang family submitted their letter of resignation during ordinary times, the imperial court may not have been so flustered, but now that the commanding general was dead and the Rong State was about to invade, the Yang family’s resignation at this point in time was a threat.

“What did the others say?”

Li Rong calmly asked.

“Your Highness should know that most clans are standing with the Yang family,” Su Rongqing replied without missing a beat. “The clans do not like changes. The Yang family guards the border, and in any case, they have been guarding it for a long time. Unless there is a real threat to the interests of the clans, the aristocratic families will not change where they stand. Now that the Yang family has forced their hand, the court officials have been shaken. Civil and military officials of the imperial court begged His Majesty to imprison Your Highness to placate the hearts of the soldiers at the border.”

“I understand.”

Li Rong nodded. Su Rongqing brought his eyes up to look at Li Rong: “What does this humble official need to do?”

“That’s not necessary.” Li Rong shook her head, “You just need to look after your own affairs well.”

Su Rongqing tightly pursed his lips. He seemed somewhat unwilling as he continued to say: “Your Highness, what I said before…”

“I am fully aware.”

Li Rong cut him off and solemnly said: “But my words to you were also sincere. I did not refuse you because I was wary or looked down on you, but Su daren truly does not have to intervene in these things. What I have promised Su daren is not a laughing matter.”

Su Rongqing did not say anything. Li Rong saw that he seemed disappointed and laughed, saying: “Since Su daren is determined to do something, why not bring a few things for Bengong next time you come by?”

“What does the Princess want?”

Su Rongqing finally had some kind of reaction when he heard this. Li Rong thought for a moment before saying: “Bring a few books. I like to read novels. You must have read many books, so recommend me a few too.”

Su Rongqing respectfully heeded the order, then Li Rong asked specific details of the situation in the morning court today. After that, the two of them fell silent. A few moments later, Su Rongqing respectfully said: “If there is nothing else, then this humble official will retire.”

Li Rong nodded and only said: “Go. Don’t be so hasty next time. Nothing will happen to me as long as I am still in Huajing.”

Su Rongqing saluted and withdrew. Once he walked out, Pei Wenxuan slowly spoke up: “Your Highness, I have also read quite a few books. Why don’t I recommend you a few books?”

“No need,” Li Rong replied, “I’m tired of reading the books that Pei daren recommends and want to take a look at something else for a change.”

Pei Wenxuan subconsciously wanted to refute it when he heard this, but he suddenly stopped before the words came out.

He suddenly remembered that he shouldn’t live like this anymore. He shouldn’t always fight with Li Rong, regardless of whether it was over Su Rongqing or not.

Actually, what Li Rong said is true. A person who always hoped that his enemy was not a good person is simply rooted by the inferiority deep in his heart.

He didn’t like Su Rongqing and always said that he was bad when in fact it was his anger and inferiority that led him to take out his frustration on Su Rongqing.

But it has been a lifetime. He had a fresh start, and Li Rong was a good woman. He didn’t want to keep quarreling with Li Rong.

So he held himself back and said nothing.

Li Rong couldn’t help but feel a bit strange when she saw that Pei Wenxuan wasn’t saying anything. In the past, he would almost immediately explode when it came to Su Rongqing. How could he stay silent for so long?

She cautiously called out: “Pei Wenxuan?”

When Pei Wenxuan did not speak up, Li Rong couldn’t help but assume the worst: “Pei Wenxuan, why aren’t you talking? Did something happen to you?”

“No.”

Pei Wenxuan steadied his emotions. He changed his posture and leaned against the wall. He adjusted his tone of voice, pretending to be calm as he said: “I was thinking about what Su Rongqing said to you before. Why did you turn him down?”

Li Rong was a little surprised. She thought that Pei Wenxuan would quarrel with her again, but it seems Pei Wenxuan had unexpectedly become open-minded?

Seeing that she had not said anything, Pei Wenxuan couldn’t help but ask: “Why aren’t you saying anything? Is it inconvenient to say?”

“No,” Li Rong returned to her senses, “Pei Wenxuan, you’ve changed too much. I’m scared, you…do you want to scold me a few words first?”

Pei Wenxuan: “…”

“I’m saying you’re just this kind of person,” Pei Wenxuan sighed. “Can’t live without quarreling, can you?”

“That’s right,” Li Rong nodded, “This way I’ll feel better in my heart.”

Pei Wenxuan: “…”

“Su Rongqing said he wanted to seek refuge with the Crown Prince, but I didn’t agree to it.” Seeing that Pei Wenxuan returned to his usual self, Li Rong decided to answer Pei Wenxuan’s question.

“Why didn’t you agree?” Pei Wenxuan frowned. It wouldn’t be a bad thing for Su Rongqing to stand on Li Chuan’s side.

“I don’t think he should be doing these things.” Li Rong flatly said, “The disasters of the Su family in the previous life mainly originated from Su Ronghua’s affairs. In this life, it’s best for Su Ronghua to stay away from Prince Su, the farther the better. He doesn’t have to follow Chuan’er early on. He only needs to do his duties well as the presiding Vice Minister of the Ministry of Justice. Chuan’er will not make things difficult for him.”

“Are you afraid of prematurely getting involved in these things and tainting his heart?”

Pei Wenxuan spoke frankly. When Li Rong didn’t say anything, Pei Wenxuan took it as a form of acknowledgment. He let out a sigh in his heart, one he could neither express nor suppress.

“You’re very good to him,” Pei Wenxuan’s voice was flat, “But you’re not afraid to pull me into the murky waters and taint my heart.”

“Is there anything pure about your heart?” Li Rong couldn’t understand Pei Wenxuan’s hypocrisy and proceeded to say in disdain: “As someone who is decades old and yet still comparing themselves with other families’ fine youths, how shameless.”

“Then what about you?” Pei Wenxuan immediately shot back, “As someone who is decades old and yet still thinking of other families’ fine youths, how shameless.”

Li Rong stopped talking. Pei Wenxuan suddenly felt that these words of his were a bit harsh too.

Li Rong and Su Rongqing had feelings for each other. He knew in his heart that even if Su Rongqing had killed her, it wasn’t that their relationship wasn’t good enough for them to arrive at that ending but that they stood on different sides. When Li Rong came back, she wanted to change where Su Rongqing stood and treat him a little better, which itself isn’t a big deal either.

It was just that he felt so uncomfortable and stifled in his heart that he couldn’t help but say: “You never advised me to stay away from these things when I was younger.”

Li Rong felt that Su Rongqing was a refined gentleman who should not be tainted by the dust of the mortal world, so she didn’t want him to be tainted by faction disputes, but what about Pei Wenxuan back then?

Weren’t there also hills and valleys in his heart where there were ten thousand crags and torrents?[1]

[1] Ten thousand crags and torrents (idiom) — trials and tribulations of a long journey in the imagery of rocky mountains and coursing streams; untold struggles

“Did we have a choice back then?” Li Rong calmly said. Pei Wenxuan suppressed the surging emotions in his heart, “There was no choice, but you’ve never thought about it, have you?”

Li Rong was silent. Pei Wenxuan took a deep breath: “In the end, it seems your feelings towards me and Su Rongqing are different after all.”

“You are well aware of this, so what are you comparing yourself for?”

Li Rong said in a peaceful manner. Pei Wenxuan froze. Li Rong plainly said: “I have been with him for 25 years, and I have only been with you for less than a year. If you want to compare in this sense, aren’t you just trying to make yourself unhappier than you are now? You said it yourself. This life has started all over again, and you plan to start over.”

Pei Wenxuan didn’t speak. Li Rong leaned against the wall, lightly tapping the fan against her shoulder.

The two were separated by a wall as they sat back to back, each looking down at the ground.

“You’re also right,” Pei Wenxuan chuckled, “I shouldn’t bother with these things since I’m starting over now. I will work on it and slowly change. In the future, don’t plot against me anymore.”

Li Rong gave a monosyllabic response in acknowledgement, not saying anything else. Pei Wenxuan straightened up and said, “I’m going to rest now. You should rest early too.”

His voice was calm, but for some reason, Li Rong still heard a bit of disappointment and embarrassment in his tone.

She knew that a sense of inferiority that could not be put to words emerged in Pei Wenxuan’s heart when faced with Su Rongqing.

Although the Su and Pei families were both large and influential clans, the Su family was century-old prestigious family, and the Pei family were originally second class aristocrats that only managed to squeeze into the ranks of the first class aristocratic families with Pei Wenxuan’s father’s great endeavors.

Pei Wenxuan was exceptionally brilliant when he was young and born handsome as well. He and Su Rongqing both attended the finest two academies in Huajing, each the brightest and best in their academy, and so, they were compared against one another year after year. If they were to be discussed as individuals, Pei Wenxuan would naturally not fall short, but there were certain things that could only be acquired over a hundred years through the inheritance passed down from generations. So whenever people mentioned Pei Wenxuan, they always say, “It’s a pity…”

When he was young, he slightly fell short of Su Rongqing because of his family background. Later on, when it came to emotional affairs, he still lost to Su Rongqing, even though Su Rongqing had been castrated.

Speaking of this, for Pei Wenxuan, this was not something that could be put down and settled with just four simple words of “to start over again.”

If this was one of their usual disputes, Li Rong wouldn’t bother to care about the discomfort in his heart, but now that Pei Wenxuan’s temper has gotten better, she can’t bear it when she thinks about him.

After thinking about it, she finally said: “Pei Wenxuan.”

The other side pretended to be sleeping and said nothing. Li Rong slowly said: “I told him to stay away from these things because he’s only in his twenties now. Moreover, I am already considered an elder, so I have some concern and desire to protect him, not any other emotions. He and I cannot start over again because he’s still twenty year old Su Rongqing, and I am fifty year old Li Rong. I’ve gotten old.”

“If you hadn’t come back, and I met the twenty year old you,” Li Rong paused and finally said, “As long as you aren’t looking for trouble, you can help me as well.”

Pei Wenxuan felt a little uncomfortable after hearing Li Rong’s words for some reason.

This kind of discomfort was not the same as the sourness before.

But what he was thinking of now was, how could Li Rong talk to him this way?

She was used to being arrogant. She had never gone out of her way for others out of pity before. Now that she had suddenly said such words, Pei Wenxuan felt even more uncomfortable after listening than when she was scolding him.

“You shouldn’t keep saying that you’re old this and you’re old that,” Pei Wenxuan spoke up, “You and I are both in our twenties. We’re very young.”

Li Rong softly laughed. She didn’t say anything more. Pei Wenxuan felt bored after a while. He stood up, went to the corner of the cell and called out to Li Rong: “Your Highness, come here for a bit.”

Li Rong was a little confused, but she still went over to the corner. She squatted down and wondered aloud: “What are you going to do?”

“Your Highness, give me your hand.”

Pei Wenxuan stretched out a hand. While Li Rong didn’t understand what he was trying to do, she still extended her hand. The two could not see each other, but they could see one another’s hands. As soon as Pei Wenxuan grasped her hand, Li Rong couldn’t help but slightly tremble.

Pei Wenxuan’s hands were rather slender, the knuckles of his hand prominent. His hands had that hot warmth and bit of roughness that men possessed.

Li Rong’s hands were slender and soft. Her skin was delicate and smooth, her nails dyed with red flower essence. The moment Pei Wenxuan caught her hand, he enveloped her entire hand in his.

An unspeakable numbness traveled up, and in an instant, the two were reminded of certain absurd years when they were younger. However, if they were to now let go in a hurry, they would look as if they had lost their composure, so both of them pretended to act calm as if they hadn’t felt anything at all.

Li Rong nonchalantly asked, “What are you doing? If you can’t provide a reason, it is no different from committing an offense against one’s superior.”

Pei Wenxuan madly blushed, but he also tried to calm down. He was glad that the two of them could not see each other right now. He gently placed something into the palm of Li Rong’s hand, then calmly let go and said: “Your Highness, here’s something good. Why don’t you give it a try and eat it?”

Li Rong was a little dazed. She took her hand back, spread her hand and saw a small round pill. She couldn’t help but be a little wary: “What is this?”

“You will know it once you eat it, Your Highness.”

“What if it’s poison?”

“Would I still need to wait until now to poison you? You ate my fish before.”

Li Rong: “……”

What he said was reasonable. Li Rong thought about it for a moment, then put the pill into her mouth.

With the sweetness and aroma of plum blossoms spreading throughout her mouth, Li Rong was at a bit of a loss. Then Pei Wenxuan asked, “Is it sweet?”

“Sweet……”

Li Rong was puzzled: “What did you give me to eat?”

“It’s a sugar ball.” Pei wenxuan laughed, “Didn’t you like sweet things back then? It felt sweet when you were eighteen. It also feels sweet when you are fifty. Li Rong, you shouldn’t care about your age too much. As long as you don’t think of yourself to be old, you will always be a little young lady at heart.”

Li Rongg didn’t say a thing. She and Pei Wenxuan were squatting in the same place in the cell. She wrapped her hands around her knees and rested her face on her arm as she sucked on the sugar ball in her mouth. She laughed and said, “What other nice words and nice things do you have? Why not let me hear some more?”

Pei Wenxuan laughed when he heard what she said and felt at ease in his heart. He stood up and went back to bed: “Not saying, I’ve lost interest. If you want to hear them, come back tomorrow. This gongzi will give you a few verses if in good spirits.”

Li Rong heard his words, gave him a “pish” and drew the curtain. Then she stood up and went back to the bed.

Li Rong slept until dawn when she woke up the next day and Jing Lan had brought some people over. They led people to wait on Li Rong and Pei Wenxuan as they freshened up, then they began to clean the cell. Li Rong and Pei Wenxuan stood in the courtyard, and with nothing else to do, they began practicing Tai Chi.

When they were young, they were restless, only looking after their health in old age. Both of them later suffered from illnesses and paid more attention to their bodies.

When Li Chuan arrived, he found the two of them practicing Tai Chi. He stood behind Li Rong, who was in the middle of Tai Chi, and asked in confusion: “Jie, since when did you start practicing Tai Chi?”

“I can also do the Five Animal Forms.”[2] Li Rong’s response came out of nowhere, making Li Chuan choke up all of the sudden. Then, he dubiously said, “No, I’m asking when you started doing the kind of things that the Grand Empress Dowager likes to do.”

Pei Wenxuan was unhappy once he heard these words. He barely managed to coax Li Rong last night. Afraid that Li Chuan’s words would make her think too much, he immediately said: “It is never too late to take care of your body. Your Highness, you should start practicing soon too.”

[2] Five Animal Forms — martial art forms in the imagery of either tiger, crane, leopard, snake and dragon or tiger, crane, monkey, snake and mantis, depending on regional styles.

Li Chuan felt that there was something wrong with these two.

But he didn’t have time to keep bickering with them and went straight to the point: “Jie, an imperial edict was issued today.”

“You’ll be going?” Li Rong knew that Li Chuan was referring to the Northwestern frontier. The Yang family had handed in their letter of resignation, so Li Ming had to send someone to the Northwest to resolve the war. At the moment, Li Chuan was being dispatched, which was part of their plan.

“I’m going to oversee the army.” Li Chuan replied. Li Rong nodded, “Is that person going?”

Li Rong was asking about Qin Lin. Li Chuan nodded and confirmed, “Going, albeit splitting up and taking two different routes. I have given him an identity and made preparations in secret ahead of time.”

“Alright.” Li Rong said softly, “Once you get there, obtain the account books as soon as possible.”

“I understand.” Li Chuan responded. Li Rong continued to practice Tai Chi as she said, “Go. I will still be here.”

When Li Chuan heard these words, he looked at Li Rong, then at Pei Wenxuan. After a moment, he called out to Pei Wenxuan: “Hey.”

Pei Wenxuan pretended not to hear him and continued to practice Tai Chi. Li Chuan knew that he was giving him the cold shoulder. While he was a bit angry, he had no time to bother with it, so he only said: “Gu will be gone these days, you must take good care of my A-jie.”

“I don’t need him to take care of me,” Li Rong immediately said, “You should hurry and go.”

“Have a smooth journey. Not seeing you off,” Pei Wenxuan replied in the middle of Tai Chi. These two made Li Chuan choke on his words. He held back for what seemed to be half a day before finally saying, “Forget it. I’m leaving.”

Having said that, he threw out his sleeves and walked out the corridor. After taking a few steps, he suddenly called out, “A-jie.”

Li Rong turned around and saw Li Chuan suddenly running over and hugging her.

He was slightly trembling as he said in a small voice: “A-jie, if I don’t come back…”

“A-jie is here.” Li Rong brought her hand up and stroked Li Chuan’s back as she gently said, “You will be safe. A-jie will protect you at all times no matter what.”

Hearing Li Rong’s words, an indescribable sense of peace settled over Li Chuan’s heart. He suddenly gained immense courage, feeling as if someone had spread their wings over him, silently protecting him from behind during the entire journey.

“A-jie,” Li Chuan quietly said, “I will come back safe and sound, so don’t be afraid.”

“When I return, I will protect you.”

Li Rong couldn’t help but laugh as she listened to Li Chuan.

Li Chuan let go of her. This time, he didn’t look back and ran out all the way.

Pei Wenxuan stood behind Li Rong. He looked at Li Rong’s expression, that gentle and peaceful kind of expression harboring hopes, it was something he had not seen in decades.

“Li Rong,” He couldn’t help but call out to her. Li Rong turned around, somewhat confused: “Hm?”

Pei Wenxuan quietly looked at Li Rong, who had turned her head to face him. He looked into the young lady’s eyes that were as clear as water and saw himself reflected in them, looked at the falling peach blossom petals that had been carried by a late spring breeze that had blown past from somewhere, and looked at Li Rong in this moment.

He suddenly had an inexplicable urge.

He hoped that Li Rong could live a lifetime with such an expression and smile.

If Li Rong can live like this for a lifetime…

Well, it was not impossible for him to suffer a bit in order to treat her well.

“Pei Wenxuan?” Li Rong saw that Pei Wenxuan wasn’t saying anything and called out to him. Pei Wenxuan came back to his senses. He softly smiled and brought his hand across her head.

“A flower fell onto your hair.”

He softly said: “I will brush it off for you.”

Willing to brush away the dust and snow for you,

Willing to accompany you for half a lifetime.

Only at that moment, Pei Wenxuan didn’t even know that there were so many things he could do for Li Rong.