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Chapter 60: The Selfish Younger Sister Speaks Out
”Onii-chan! Here! Octopus! It’s octopus! It’s so good!
”Mmm
 it really is. I didn’t know octopus could taste this good
”
After returning to our room from the open-air bath, we tucked into the sumptuous seafood dishes laid out on the table.
Octopus taste good.
”Oh, that’s my splendid alfonsino” (It’s a fish)
”It’s your fault if you don’t eat it right away~. The octopus is so good! I run out of mine!”
It’s true. Well, octopus is delicious, so it can’t be helped.
”Oh! This tuna is probably the best tuna I’ve ever had!”
Sachi smiles with a big smile on her face as she proceeds to eat her chopsticks with relish. I felt nostalgic at the sight of her.
“
. Did something good happen?”
”Hmm, it’s a secret!”
My sister answers with a thumbs up. I was so happy to see her. The timing of the meeting suggests that something good must have happened with Saori.
”I’m glad you’re in a good mood, young lady (Ojou-sama).”
”Yes, because today I am a young lady (Ojou-sama). I told you, didn’t I? This is a date. Make sure I’m in a good mood, okay?”
Yes. I reply lightly. I hide my slight agitation at the word “date” in the pride of being an older brother.
“
It’s been a while since I’ve felt like this.”
”I guess so
 It’s been a really, really long time.”
Sachi, my sister, is a selfish person. She is truly the lady of the family, and looking back, I feel like “back then” the whole family was swept up in Sachi’s selfishness.
She was the
.center of our family.
”It’s really delicious.”
”Yes, it is
”
From that point on, time passed without a single word from either of us. The speed of the chopsticks did not change, but the time that passed between the two of us seemed to be very short.
But there was no awkwardness there, and yet there was an air that was peculiar to siblings that could not be adequately described by ordinary words.
The time passed for a while.
The dishes were put down, the TV was turned on and we watched together, we went back into the hot spring, and then we came back out again.
Somewhere we both knew that it was a kind of countdown. She had made up her mind about something and was waiting for an opportunity to confide it to me.
Then, some minutes after turning off the lights, she crawled under the two futon mattresses. Some minutes later, after turning off the lights, I saw a presence crawl into my futon.
I couldn’t see the expression on the young lady’s face because it was too dark, but I gave up trying to see her because I was sure she would prevent me from doing so.
“Shut up, Onii-chan, dont say anything”
“I haven’t said anything yet
”
The selfish young lady pinches my side and makes unreasonable demands, but I know she is simply hiding her embarrassment, so I don’t say anything more.
”You know
 Do you think I’m selfish?”
What was the intention behind this question? Was it today, or was it something more recent, or was it a question I had asked as my sister in the past?
Lost for an answer, I gave a somewhat unfair answer.
“Even if you were being selfish, I wouldn’t hate you, so don’t worry.”
The answer was rather blue in the face, even though I had said it myself. Slowly, a sense of shame would start to rise in the air, and it would become so obvious even in the dark, my face would be red.
”Creepy”
Sachi replies with one short word. But contrary to her words, her voice sounded happy.
She probably noticed that I had misled her. But the fact that she didn’t pursue that point was probably a good enough answer.
“Well, okay then.”
Sachi put her arms around my stomach and hugged me, burying her face in my back.
Sachi always hides her face like this when she has something important to say. I hadn’t really thought about it before, but I thought this was Sachi’s way of being sweet to me.
That’s why I have to face my sister as an older brother.
Well, okay then. I don’t know what’s okay and what’s good. So I just listen to Sachi’s words from the front.
Waiting for Sachi’s words. I can clearly hear her breathing, and while there is a hint of nervousness in her breathing, I can feel the heat of her trust in me.
Her arm around me tightened, and finally she said,
“—I want you and mom to make up.”
“
Sachi?”
These words brought back a sense of nostalgia, and I am sure that Sachi, the person who said them, felt the same way.
We were a normal family. Even in the past, I had at least a few fights with my mother.
Sachi was no different, and we both tried to quiet each other down and talk to each other to make things right.
But now it is different. Both of us have grown up, and the environment and circumstances surrounding each other are different.
”You know
 Even mother apologized to you.”
Sachi says in a sultry voice. There was a hint of anxiety, fear, and a childlike quality that I had not seen in a long time.
She’s so selfish. I honestly thought so.
Nevertheless, I wondered why. But why did I feel so much love for her?
“
Really, you’re selfish, young lady”
”
yes, I’m the star of the show today.”
That’s why. Sachi continued.
”I don’t want to be separated from you. I really want to live with the three of us in our original home. I love grandpa and grandpa and grandma, but I still want to be with the three of us.”
”I love mom no matter what Onii-chan thinks. More to the point, I love mother with Onii-chan, and I love it even more when Onii-chan is with mother.”
“There is no way I can suppress this feeling. There is no such thing as “each to their own”. I want to be with everyone and love everyone. It’s not fair. It has to be that way. I can’t accept it any other way. Nothing else is acceptable to me.”
“Now we are not. I don’t want stagnation. I want to get to that destination, as quickly as possible, and I want to get there now.”
Her voice trembles, but she must be holding back tears to keep them from falling. Sachi’s thoughts spread throughout her body as the warmth from her arms and from her back travels up her body.
“That’s why Onii-chan, can I be selfish?”
It was crucial for both of us.
With words and thoughts that Sachi herself would have considered taboo.
And the biggest selfishness of all—-
”—-Please forgive mother.”
Her voice was thin, but still powerful enough to resonate in my heart.
Sachi has always put my opinion first, but when was the last time she said something so selfish?
When was the last time I heard such selfishness from my sister, who has always respected my opinion to the utmost?
When was the last time I felt Sachi so much like a “child”?
I look back. Have my heels been etched in her footprints?
Have you walked this far while standing tall?
—I’m glad you have grown up.)
Onii-chan is not to blame. Onii-chan is the victim.
Because that selfishness seemed strangely more important than those words. There were many things I could realize with that one voice.
It was a 100% pure request that she had been keeping bottled up until now. Words that she should never have said, as she was aware of her sins and was trying to atone for them.
What kind of conflicts did she face? How much courage did it take for her to expose her true feelings, which she had been holding back, blocking up, and keeping bottled up?
Don’t glamorize it. For her, this must have been a starting point.
This is her original trajectory that she has finally stepped onto.
The logic is clear and simple. She apologized, now forgive her.
Her true feelings and the shape of her family. It was always Sachi who started it all.
I realize once again that Sachi has been holding back for a long time. I don’t think it’s my fault, but I’ve grown enough to think that I don’t want to let that happen any more.
Otherwise, I would hate it.
“
Let’s go for a walk.”
”
heh?”
As if to shake off my embarrassment, I forcefully undo Sachi’s restraints and stand up. I took Sachi’s hand, who was puzzled by my sudden action, and made her stand up.
“Let’s do it? Strategy Meeting “
“—Yes!”
It was a little after 10 o’clock. It is not a good time for high school and junior high school students to be walking around.
But today, today at least, was a good day.
”I feel like I’m going to do something bad.”
”Well, I guess you’re not a good kid”
Holding hands this time, we walked out of the house.
The color of the world hadn’t changed. It was just that my view of the world had changed.