He sat on a swaying…he didn’t know what it was, but he was very dizzy. It seemed that he couldn’t open his eyes, and even as he finally did, he felt something wet run down from his temples. It was thick and sticky, with a fishy smell; it stung at his eyes.
However, in front of him was simply nothingness. Pure black swallowed up all other colours except for one tiny window. From there, looking outside, he could see the quiet, distant plane of a starry sky.
It was very beautiful and dazzling – it just seemed a little lonely.
But that wasn’t really important. He bent down and lightly hugged himself. He didn’t know how long had passed, but suddenly he covered his face and began to cry bitterly.
He was like a curled up branch, frail yet tenacious.
To tell the truth, he didn’t remember why he was crying. Crying loudly and bitterly like this, with his back heaving with each breath and his whole body faintly trembling, he was like a piece of worn, crumpled cloth, an abandoned little cub.
Why was he crying?
In spite of everything, he couldn’t think of anything at all.
There was only a faint awareness that some corner of his heart had been cut out, and it seemed like his body had been cut open with it.
It was right at this moment when he smelled something extremely alluring.
He rubbed at his eyes, catching sight of the grilled fish that had suddenly appeared before him…and began to realise that he was dreaming.
With everything as messy as this, it was definitely a dream ah.
Don’t casually try to entice someone with grilled fish while they’re crying in their dreams, alright?
Though in any case, it’s still a dream. Doesn’t that mean I can do whatever I want? Shen Zhifan thought. In order to lord around in his dream, he decided to act on this thought and will the fish to fly over and be fed to him.
…Then, the fish was actually picked up by chopsticks and fed to him.
This dream was so good ah.
On one hand, Shen Zhifan was crying. On the other, he began eating the fish.
The scene was very embarrassing. Fortunately, since it was a dream, no one could see.
He thought happily.
Yan Shuo, “…”
He used a napkin to gently wipe the other’s cheek, comforting him softly, “Little ancestor, I’ve fed you and you’ve eaten, what else do you want ah?” <sup>1</sup> Little ancestor – an affectionate nickname for a loved one. The raws don’t actually have ‘little’ but i figured it sounds better in english that way lol.
Although that was what he said, he didn’t plan for Shen Zhifan to actually respond – with drunk people, reason was not on the table.
Shen Zhifan’s lovely, tear-stained face was like raindrops on a pear blossom. Even so, he kept steadily eating each bite of the fish.
Yan Shuo really couldn’t make sense of what he was seeing, but his heart still ached for the other.
Shen Zhifan, who’d lost his memories but retained the reactions of his body, had cried in front of him twice now.
This meant that…he was definitely very aggrieved.
The esteemed General felt that his heart had been caught in a crushing grip. Thinking of this, he fed Shen Zhifan the last bite of fish.
His hands were quite dexterous. After all, he had practiced since he was young, and so the meat of the fish was scraped off so cleanly that a complete skeleton was left. Shen Zhifan was also aware that he’d eaten enough and cried enough. Obediently closing his mouth, he tilted his head and fell back asleep.
Ah, even though he was drunk, he didn’t waste one bite.
“Don’t you want me to praise you and say you’re a good boy, hm?”
He said, stroking Shen Zhifan’s nose.
Resigned, he then lifted Shen Zhifan into his arms.
Shen Zhifan really couldn’t be said to be heavy, but wasn’t as light as a girl – granted, Yan Shuo had never held a girl before. Shen Zhifan seemed rather skinny, but was in fact at a healthy weight under his clothes.
The sensation was pretty good.
…alright, it was extremely nice.
The esteemed General, who’d been kept busy all night, finally felt that he’d gotten a bit of a bargain.
However, being blown by the cold wind from outside, Shen Zhifan stirred lightly.
This time he really—Woke—Up.
He opened his eyes dazedly, and his mind went, “Who am I, where am I, what am I doing”. He didn’t even have time to vent that out before he caught sight of Yan Shuo’s chin.
…how come he could see his male god’s chin?
Oh, his male god’s chin was really quite handsome.
He thought, and thought…then suddenly woke up with a start.
Holy. Fuck.
He was being carried by his male god ah?
And it was—a princess carry?
Shen Zhifan felt like he was going to explode. Unfortunately, his whole body was still limp and powerless, and his mind was a lump of puffed up dough – only his heart could do so.
Yan Shuo hadn’t carried him for long. At nighttime, there were many people in the alley, and carrying a man like this was extremely eye-catching. After exiting the grilled fish place, he put Shen Zhifan down.
Then he saw Shen Zhifan gazing at him with lidded eyes and thought that the other probably still wasn’t awake. He carefully stroked his head.
“Do you want to stand for a moment?”
Shen Zhifan was still in shock. It was a pity that he couldn’t really move his body, and could only support himself on Yan Shuo.
Wait a minute, he was trying to figure out his thoughts.
Today—his male god—had taken him out to eat—grilled fish.
Then he’d had a sip of wine and hadn’t gotten to have one bite of fish when…he didn’t know anything from there.
And so the question was, in that period of time, had something happened?
Why was his male god carrying him so naturally, and holding him???
Two young girls suddenly walked over. Shen Zhifan heard them chattering between themselves, before the braver one walked up to him and asked timidly.
“Hello, um…are you KK? You are KK, right? You look exactly the same…”
“He’s not.”
Yan Shuo’s answer was quick and sharp, the expression in his eyes cold and indifferent. It cut down the girl’s heart that was full of enthusiasm.
Even after having a bucket of cold water splashed onto her excitement, the girl was still incessantly pestering and asked, “Ah, you’re definitely KK! We’re both KK’s fans, and really want an autograph…”
Seeing that she was calculating to get close and see Shen Zhifan’s face more clearly, Yan Shuo simply pressed Shen Zhifan’s face against his own chest, calmly and openly embracing him.
“He’s not some KK, he is my lover.”
The girls’ eyes widened.
…Shen Zhifan’s eyes widened.
“I’m – I’m very sorry,” Intimidated by Yan Shuo’s aura, the girl stepped back. In the end she could only meekly say, “I don’t know if anyone has ever told your lover that he really looks like KK…”
“No one has.”
Yan Shuo’s response was still very firm and direct. Calmly looking at her like this, even though he didn’t say anything more, it was evident from his own cold aura that he had already seen through her and that she was very unwelcome.
Shen Zhifan’s eyes were still wide open.
Although his limbs were still as heavy as iron, he could smell the fragrance of Yan Shuo’s distinctive scent.
He felt extremely warm with Yan Shuo’s palm covering the back of his head.
The two girls quickly walked away with expressions full of embarrassment, and their corner of the alley settled down again. This time, the cold breeze couldn’t blow on his head since he was still held in Yan Shuo’s embrace.
So, what had happened?
He’d gotten blackout drunk?
Or had he lost his memories again?
Or was he still dreaming?
Just as he was thinking, Yan Shuo slowly released him.
He let out a light sigh, the flush on his face gradually receding. Being too close to his male god, don’t talk about recovering his right mind, even breathing was difficult.
Then, he felt something warm and soft press against his forehead.
Very well. This time, Shen Zhifan completely forgot how to breathe.
Yan Shuo lightly pressed his lips to Shen Zhifan’s forehead, actually somewhat apprehensive, although…he didn’t know anyway, right?
He’d indulge himself a little, for a moment.
1
Little ancestor – an affectionate nickname for a loved one. The raws don’t actually have ‘little’ but i figured it sounds better in english that way lol.