Both of them had seemed to calm down a bit, and it seemed they had regained their composure after drinking a glass of water.
While I did promise them that Iād depend more on them, I do need to make one thing clear to them both so I figured now was the chance, with them calmer again.
āMind if I return back to the previous topic? I know I said that I will fully depend on you two from here on but there is one thing that will be the exception to this.ā
āā¦ā¦ā¦Eh? What is it?.āāugh, now Iām feeling a bit queasy again.ā
āThatās just the alcohol doing its thing. Your face is completely red as well. Probably shouldnāt have gulped it down like that on your first attempt eh?ā
āHow did that shitty dad of mine handle so much of this shit so easily. Regardless, I donāt think Iāll ever drink againā¦ā¦ā¦.that all aside, what was this āexceptionā you were talking about!? You literally promised us otherwise though?ā
āI did but, I still donāt plan on making you two start killing people. That is one thing I wonāt budge on.ā
When I declared that, I could feel the mood freeze up again.
āIs there a reason behind that?ā
āReason? On the contrary, there should be no reason that would justify a human killing another human. The times being what they are, thereās no doubt thereād be many chances where youāll have to make the decision to kill or not but, thereās no harm in choosing the path of not becoming a murderedā¦ā¦ā¦..Take this as a word of wisdom from someone that has killed quite a few at this point.ā
Even though most of the people I had killed were only due to self defence as they had tried to kill me first but, even then, their faces would come to haunt me in my dreams countless times.
I keep drudging through this path for the sake of my revenge, or at least thatās what I tell myself, but the sensation of cutting through a human body still remains strongly inside my mind.
ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦my only consolation is that the fact that I still see them as nightmares is proof that I still have some humanity left inside me.
I can tell that recently my hesitation towards murder is slowly disappearing more and more.
And thatās why my only wish was for Ralf and Esta to not fall as far as I had.
āBut thatās exactly why I said that I donāt want you to bear this burden alone. I said this before but, we three must share our burdens equally!ā
āNo, I will not yield in this one thing. This is my one condition that you must accept no matter what.ā
āI will accept. When the moment truly comes, I know that I will hesitate, and that hesitation is proof that I know that itās not the right thing to do. And to be honest, I would like it if Chris-san didnāt have to kill people either.ā
āI wholeheartedly agree with you on the last part so donāt worry. I only cross the line when thereās literally no other choice.ā
Esta very quickly agreed with my condition.
She was always against the act of killing and she herself still feels a strong distaste towards it which is a good thing.
I know Ralf deep inside feels the same as Esta, so I hope heād also agree butā¦..
āI donāt agree with this! In the first place, we were thieves, criminals! Iām happy youāre worried for me like that but, I was never the kind of good guy with uptight morals like that!ā
āI know very well about your past record as thieves, I was almost a victim myself after all. But even then, I know very well that you two donāt have the disposition of real criminals. You only succumbed to thievery because that was your only way to survive, and would have avoided it if there was a better way right?ā
I knew I had hit the mark as Ralf struggled to refute my claim.
āTrust me, I really do trust you with all of my heart Ralf. But this is something different, and I wonāt budge on my condition.ā
āā¦ā¦ā¦..FINE! But, if a situation arises where I need to cross that line, I will do so, so just keep that in your head!ā
āSure. That covers pretty much everything I wanted to say.ā
All three of us sighed greatly, and the tense atmosphere relaxed again.
Unlike our usual chats, we were discussing a much heavier topic, so I felt more tired than usual after all was said and done.
My fatigue was starting to catch up to me as well so I wanted to end the day and go to sleep but, there was one more thing to talk about actually.
That was to decide our next course of action and to make a decision on what to do with [Under Eye].
āRalf, weāre done with your topic right? Then actually, there was something I wanted to discuss.ā
āEh? What is it Chris?ā
āNothing to do with āusā. I wanted to decide our next course of actionā¦ā¦ā¦you two, what do you think we should do about [Under Eye] now?ā
āI think we have no choice but to fight them. Theyāll be actively targeting us from now it seems.ā
āI agree with Esta! Donāt see any other way to handle it really!ā
Looks like they had already made their resolve, as they quickly gave their answers.
In that case, Iād rather attack them first rather than wait for them to come to us.
āI agree with you two. Iām thinking we crush [Under Eye] before we get to Klaus. Itās clear as day that theyāre going to keep getting in our way.ā
āI agree but, do we have any info on where we might find them?ā
āDuring my interrogation, I did find out that they are located somewhere in the black market of the capital. When Charlotteās messenger comes, weāll give the details to them as well, and directly target [Under Eye] first when we finally head to the capital.ā
āNo arguments here! Next time, Iāll go all out and fight as well!ā
āI believe thatās the right decision as well. Then [Under Eye] is our next target.ā
āGood to see you both agreeā¦ā¦ā¦.from here on, you two are going to fight a lot as you wished, so better harden your resolves while you have the time.ā
āIāve had that done for quite some time now dude! Leave it to us!ā
The three of us silently bumped fists, settling our next objective.
We are still on standby until Charlotteās messenger comes but, as soon as she gets in contactāāWe head to the capital and crush [Under Eye].