Chapter 79.1

Truth be told, I’ve had a lot of physical contact with Damian. 

There were times when we held hands, changed clothes, and hugged each other. 

But not in this way…

‘I don’t think he’s ever hugged me so affectionately.’

It’s weird. 

My mouth became dry and my heart was pounding. 

A new heat spread over my face which was already flushed from crying. 

Confused, I buried my face in Damian’s arms. 

What is this?

“Every time you…I think I can only apologize.”

His soft voice caressed my ear. 

His steady heartbeat calmed my stressed mind. 

“Once again, I’m sorry I could only tell you not to worry.”

“…I, your Highness.”

“But…this is the best I can do at the moment.”

Damian calmly vocalized his intentions. 

“I’m leaving.”

“…what do you mean!”

“This way, I can avoid causing harm to anyone.”

Unbeknownst to me, Damian seemed to have his heart set on this. 

“And isn’t it time for me to be able to stand on my own two feet, without having to depend on you and Her Majesty?”

“What?”

I was so wide-eyed that I stopped crying. 

Damian gave a playful smile. 

“You’ll see, I’ll come back as a better man.”

“Stop, a better man?”

“Yeah. Don’t fall for me when I come back.”

Damian joked away. 

…it’s unsettling how Damian can just laugh in a situation like this. 

Looking at him blankly, I bit my lip and gulped back the tears. 

It’s as if Damian had already made up his mind…

‘I’m a fool for crying and being hung up on this.’

In desolation, I leaned on him without saying another word. 

I didn’t want to bother Damian anymore with my foolishness.

 

***

 

After shedding tears for a while, I got up. 

“Take a break, you must be worn out from all that crying.”

Damian tried to dissuade me, but I shook my head. 

It was because it hurts now to even look at Damian’s face. 

With a feeble gait, I entered the Empress’s palace. 

Meanwhile. 

“…Lize?”

The Empress’s voice echoed. 

Those dark green eyes of hers were taken aback. 

“Y-Your Majesty.”

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I called out to the Empress in a trembling voice. 

At the same time, tears began rolling down my cheeks. 

Even though I had cried so much before, there were still tears left. 

The Empress rushed over to me and bent down as my sniffles became louder and I wasn’t able to speak clearly. 

“What’s going on Charlize? Your face is colorless,” asked the Empress in a worried tone. 

“I-It’s…”

I couldn’t get the words out. 

It’s because the very second I say the words, ‘Damian’s leaving.’ It could become a reality set in stone.

I just couldn’t bring myself to say it. 

I knew Damian leaving was something already decided but like an idiot, I…

“Didn’t I tell you the other day, the day when you rejected the adoption?”

The Empress tenderly rubbed my back as she opened her lips. 

“If you’re going through a rough time, talk to me about it.”

“…your Majesty.”

“So tell me what happened. Who knows, I might just have the solution?”

As soon as the Empress’s sweet and reassuring voice reached my ears, words poured forth as if a dam had just burst. 

“Well, his Highness…he’s going to the Kier plains in the north.”

“Hold on, Kier? You mean the northern Kier plains?”

“Yes. His Majesty, the Emperor has given him an order to……to leave for the Kier plains.”

The news shook the Empress as a startled expression crept over her face. 

I grabbed onto the collar of the Empress’s dress in a fit of temper. 

“I-I know I’m incompetent for this…I couldn’t get the order withdrawn.”

“Why does that make you incompetent?”

“The news that he was leaving for Kier…er, I couldn’t stop him.”

With a voice muddled by tears, I gurgled hopelessly. 

“It’s not even the territory of Margrave Antes but Kier of all places.” 

“Lize.”

“Everyone knows. There are only demonic beasts in Kier, and very few soldiers who’ve managed to survive for more than a year there…”

“I know you’re emotional, but calm down a little.”

The Empress tried to console me, but it was all in vain. 

“His Highness will go to that dangerous place…what if something happens to him?”

In the end, I cried so much that I had trouble breathing. 

The Empress hastily embraced me in her arms. 

I grasped the Empress’s collar tightly. 

“Can’t I do anything for his Highness?”

“…it’s.”

“I’ve been thinking about it, but I have no idea what to do…” I muttered to the Empress. 

What am I supposed to do?

I hate, hate myself for being so powerless. 

I decided to stay by Damian’s side, and yet there’s nothing I can do about this predicament.

I bit my lips till they bled, lowering my head to the floor in despair. 

Meanwhile, the Empress signed and added. 

“If you’re so sad about it, how will Her Majesty, the Empress dowager feel about this…”

“*sniffles* what?”

“Don’t you know? The Empress dowager still hasn’t been allowed to see her grandchild face to face and now he’s leaving.”

For a moment, I froze.