It doesn't seem like I'm the shortest... But I don't think I've seen anyone smaller than me since I came here. Oh, then I might be the shortest person. Even five years ago... I shook my head to dispel such thoughts.
"Your hair is curly like mine."
"Yes, a little bit."
"Your bangs are all crooked."
Joelly pointed at my short bangs and laughed. Embarrassed, I fiddled with my bangs. The thought of my face being exposed made me shrink back. As I bowed my head in shame, she laughed even louder.
"That's good. Bring it over."
"Yes!"
Happiness burst out at the answer I had been waiting for. I answered loudly without realizing it and then felt flustered, but Joelly responded with a laugh. I awkwardly smiled and closed the wardrobe, then ran to her.
Joelly got up from the chair and took off her robe. Seeing her smooth figure, I felt a bit embarrassed, even though I was a woman. So, I averted my gaze and helped her put on the dress. I fastened all the buttons on her back and smoothed out the wrinkles in the fabric.
The dress that revealed her figure suited her well.
"Can you do something about my hair?"
"Yes."
Joelly sat back down in the chair. I placed a mirror in front of her and turned to her back. Her long hair was lush and shiny. I brought a brush and carefully combed it.
"Curly hair looks voluminous, which is nice, but it gets too messy if you don't take care of it."
"Still, it's pretty."
"Thank you. Is Ann not as curly as me?"
"I'm even more messy. My hair sticks up all over the place."
At that moment, Joelly suddenly turned and grabbed my hair. I was so startled by her sudden touch that my body stiffened. Joelly, ignoring my reaction, played with the ends of my hair and twirled them.
"Your ends really do stick up."
"...Yes."
"Still, it's cute. Once I touch it, I can't forget it."
She continued to play with my hair for a while. Whenever I sent her an embarrassed look, she responded with a laugh. I had to stand awkwardly with my back bent, waiting for her to let go. But when it didn't seem like she would, I couldn't hold back and asked if I could fix my hair. Only then did Joelly laugh and let me go.
Regaining my freedom, I returned to fixing her hair. I gathered her lush hair, twisted it up, and secured it with a flower-shaped accessory. I tidied up the stray strands with small pins.
When I finished, Joelly carefully examined her styled hair. She smiled broadly as she turned her head this way and that, looking at herself in the mirror.
"You have good hands."
"Thank you."
Fortunately, she seemed pleased. A contented smile hung on her lips. I looked at Joelly in the mirror. She radiated a light with her floral adornment. It seemed she was indeed the Countess.
"Alright. Go now."
"Yes."
I bowed and turned around. Just as I was about to leave, I grabbed the doorknob.
"Ann."
Suddenly, she called me. When I turned, Joelly was already standing, looking at me. Our eyes met, and she tilted her head slightly, stretching her lips into a long smile.
"I welcome you to this place."
Joelly had been smiling from our shocking first meeting to now. She seemed to be a person who was used to smiling. But strangely, her smile now felt different. It was so intense that I couldn't even smile back at her.
How should I describe it? It felt more negative than positive, more like a conscious effort to hide her true feelings rather than a habitual smile.
But I dismissed it as just my imagination.
"It's an honor."
I clasped my hands together and bowed deeply.
* * *
It seemed Joelly liked me, so from that day on, I attended to her. In exchange, Alicia was assigned to clean other areas. These were mostly unused rooms or storerooms that were quite dirty. Alicia, displeased, went to Audrey a few times to complain, only to have her area changed to even dirtier places that no one wanted to clean.
Alicia is a maid, after all. Whether she liked it or not, there was nothing she could do. Perhaps her pride was hurt, but every time she finished her work and returned to her room, she would hit her pillow as if trying to burst it and scream. I had told her to be more careful with her words.
'Why is the owner a woman! What bad luck!'
To me, Joelly seemed like the Countess, but I didn't tell her. Alicia even asked me if I thought about running away. I pretended not to hear.
Alicia was dismissed, but Johnny remained. Out of embarrassment, he kept running away, but he still had to come to Joelly every time. Unfortunately, it seemed he was also assigned to attend to Joelly. However, it felt more like she kept him around as an ornamental flower.
He would help me when I took out clothes or items, but he would stand far away whenever I had to touch or interact with Joelly. He was also forbidden to leave the room without permission, so he couldn't run away. Whenever an awkward situation arose, Johnny would close his eyes and endure it.
'How cute.'
Joelly enjoyed Johnny's embarrassed reactions. Sometimes she would touch him with peculiar gestures or send him subtle glances. Each time, Johnny would be flustered.
'Hey, hide me.'
'How can I hide you? Stop saying ridiculous things.'
'That woman keeps looking at me strangely. Why is she looking at me like that?'
'I don't know.'
And soon, I understood the meaning of those glances.
Joelly called men to her room every night. A different man each night. I didn't know their identities, but it seemed some were male servants. One night, I was woken up and called to her room, only to find a naked man lying next to her, which was incredibly embarrassing.
'I like pretty things. But I don't want to force anyone. It's only truly enjoyable when both parties enjoy it. It's disgusting if only one person is happy, right?'
That was why she kept Johnny around. She didn't want to force him if he didn't like it, so she seemed to be waiting for him to change his mind. It also meant that she really liked him. The actual person, however, only felt threatened and didn't understand her hidden intentions.
But I sensed something different in Joelly's gaze. When our eyes met, her gaze was gentle, but when they didn't, her gaze felt piercing. It was as if she was watching me closely. Whenever I felt that gaze, I couldn't help but tense up.
This situation repeated for a few days. Joelly became increasingly picky, Johnny was flustered, and I focused on my work between them. At first, it was awkward, but I eventually got used to it.
However, my assigned area changed. Suddenly, I was moved to cleaning the rooms on the second floor. I didn't know why. Had I inadvertently upset Joelly? Still, cleaning was familiar, so this was more comfortable. Plus, I wouldn't have to endure her peculiar gaze anymore, which was a relief.
Alicia took my place. How did she manage that? My curiosity was satisfied when a maid in the same area told me that Alicia had begged Audrey for another chance a few days ago.
Joelly would glare at me fiercely every time I returned from attending to her and going to her room, but I never expected her to secretly do something like that. That prideful Alicia.
'What's your plan?'
'What do you mean?'
'Why are you lowering your pride to attend to her?'
Alicia glared at me savagely.
'Because of you!'
'Me?'
'Yes! You were trying to take my place again!'
No, what did I do? As I was bewildered, Alicia shouted.
'I'd rather attend to that woman than be outdone by you!'
Only then did I realize Alicia's true nature. She had a bad habit of trying to take anything I had. I had already learned that Joelly was a picky woman. I could somewhat predict what might happen when Alicia was alone with her. But Alicia was so upset by me taking her place that she was willing to endure such situations.
'At least if I attend to her, I might have a chance to meet other nobles later. It's annoying, but there's nothing I can do right now.'
Despite her irritable demeanor, it seemed she wasn't acting purely on impulse. It didn't matter to me, though.
'Good luck.'
'Don't interfere with my work.'
I had thought this before, but I had no intention of interfering.
I didn't come here by choice, but since I was here, I wanted to focus on my assigned tasks. Whether it was attending to Joelly or cleaning, it didn't matter. From what Johnny said, the pay was good, so I didn't have to worry about that. Since I was on probation, I might have to leave eventually. I needed to earn as much as I could before then to avoid starving when I left.
Thanks to being moved away from Joelly, I could better understand this place.
While cleaning the windows in the hallway, I stared at the dense foliage outside. As I pushed through the foliage, I occasionally saw something pale. I recently realized that the pale thing was another mansion of this earl's family. It was so far away that it was hard to notice unless you looked closely.
I didn't think this place was the main house, surrounded as it was by forests. Was it a secondary residence? There was no garden, which was unusual for a noble's mansion.
But even if there was another mansion, I couldn't go there. The servants here couldn't leave without Audrey's permission. Moreover, no one visited this place. Despite being an earl's family, I hadn't heard of anyone coming here since I arrived. Joelly also didn't go out much. Perhaps because of this, our permission to go out was strict.
The only place we could go without special permission was the front door of the mansion. Once we stepped into the forest, we would be questioned about where we were going and for what reason.
Perhaps because we were on probation, it seemed we were under strict management. After talking with a maid I worked with, I learned that all the servants in this mansion, like me and Alicia, were brought in from outside.
Surrounded by forests, unable to visit other mansions, or even see a proper garden. Moreover, all the servants were outsiders. I had never seen the Earl's face, and the only person I knew was Joelly, the Countess. But why was the Countess living in such a remote secondary residence?
After a few days of observation, I came to this conclusion:
What a strange mansion.
Usually, there would be one or two long-serving servants. I thought about the place I used to work at... but I quickly shook my head. Perhaps because of my past experiences, memories from five years ago kept popping up lately.
I hadn't completely forgotten. There were memories I couldn't forget even if I wanted to. I often recalled the events from that mansion. I was sold for gold coins, but there were more good memories than bad. Despite the bad start and end, the beautiful memories I sometimes reminisce about are because of that.
Sometimes, I thought about that man.
The memories, conversations, and promises we shared in that short time, and our final moments. Concern for him, left alone in that dark room, would occasionally shake me. It had been five years already.
A vanished maid like me would be forgotten over time. She might even be dead. Yet, I sometimes wondered if he was still looking for me.
That's impossible.
'It's impossible.'
Even if he was, he couldn't find me. He had never seen my face. How could he find someone he had never seen?
And another man came to mind.
I immediately shook it off. The only way to deal with the gloomy feeling was to shake it off. He must be doing well. Everyone must be doing well. So, I must do well too. I consoled myself with these thoughts.