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She cried as she listened to him whispering in her ears, mingled in with tiny kisses. In a trance, she was being forcibly dragged into the torrent of time. If everything went back to that original point, would there be different experiences and different results? He safeguarded all of this meticulously, but did not again easily let other people see. They had missed each other, but after going around in circles, were pulled back together by the hand of fate.
She was like a deer, her wet eyelashes still stuck to his face, making him feel that what he was holding was actually a kind of illusory happiness. Even himself didn’t know how long it’d been. He had longed and hoped. From so far back in the past, it had already started, like a small seed sprouting in his heart, growing day by day, day by day, until it finally broke out of its shell. He used to stop it in vain, but now he didn’t know if it was because of siblings or because of jealousy, jealous of her appearing in front of him casually, like she had completely forgotten that night.
After so many years, so many roads walked, fate had sent her back to him. Only then did he know that it was her. So that was how it was supposed to be.
In any case, he would not let her go again. The first time he had let her go ignorantly and she had become a stranger; the second time he let go, he almost lost his life. This time he wouldn’t let go anymore. She belonged to him. She was his.
The last time it was intense pain, this time it was chaotic confusion. Before he woke up, Du Xiaosu left silently. She felt that she had made a mistake again. Last time, she wasn’t able to repel him, but this time, she could resist but she didn’t. It was obviously a taboo that could not be touched. He was clearly Zhenrong’s brother. She clearly made a big mistake in the past, but now, she was making one mistake after another. Morality made her feel ashamed, and her conscience made her helpless.
She locked herself in the room all day, and she ignored whoever knocked on the door. Lei Yuzheng was probably afraid of something happening to her again and found the key to the room to come in. She just lay there quietly, pretending to sleep with her eyes closed. He stood in front of the bed for a while and then left.
When she went downstairs, he was sitting at the top of the stairs with a cigarette in his hand. There was a huge ashtray on the floor next to it, full of cigarette butts. Looking at the soot on the wooden floor, she didn’t know how long he had sat here.
After the operation, the doctor told him to stop smoking, and he really did. She didn’t expect him to smoke again today.
He completely blocked her path. She held her anger, “Get out of the way.”
He moved aside, she walked past him and walked to the bottom of the stairs. He did not speak.
Actually, there was nowhere to go. She stumbled to the lake. There was a group of ducklings in the lake. A mother had taken her child there, tearing bread apart piece by piece, feeding the ducklings. Because the management of the community was very strict, there were entrance guards at the entry and exit. Not many people lived here, so there were only the three of them at the lake. The mother and daughter pair feeding the ducklings couldn’t help but turn over to look at her. She hadn’t eaten all day, but only felt that there was acidic water in her stomach. She squatted down to vomit but couldn’t vomit. The lady seemed very concerned and helped her to her feet: “What’s the matter, do you want to go to the hospital?”
She gave a weak smile: “It’s okay, it’s just a stomach ache.”
The little girl called out very cutely: “Auntie.” Then she asked her mother, “Is Auntie going to give birth to a baby? I saw it all on TV.”
The lady smiled: “No, the auntie just has a stomach ache. It will be all better once you go to the hospital to check.”
At that moment, a terrible thought flashed in Du Xiaosu’s mind, but before she could catch onto it, the maid had already found her. The maid was very anxious when she saw her from a distance: “Something has happened to Mr. Lei…”
Lei Yuzheng had already thrown everything that could be thrown in the room. The nurses had been shut outside the door. The butler looked at her as if she were his savior and pushed the key into her hands. She could only open the door to the room. It was actually very quiet inside. The curtains were drawn, the lights were not turned on, and it was so dark nothing could be seen.
She fumbled to turn on the light, only to find him squatting in the corner alone, squatting into a ball from the severe pain. It was surprising to see such a large man, who had a stature of 183 cm, trembling.
She squatted down and stretched out her hand tentatively. His whole body was spasming. His teeth were clenched tightly. He still wanted to push her away. She felt that he was sulking. Fortunately, the pain made him have no strength. She held him in her arms. He was still trembling, but could not speak. She patiently coaxed him: “Just one injection, okay? Let the nurse come in and give you an injection, okay?”
He shook his head stubbornly, like every time before. His headache had been getting smaller and smaller, the pain lighter and lighter recently. It had never been seere to this extent. She knew why. When he was sitting alone at the top of the stairs, he had helplessly watched her come out, just like that day when he heard the porridge was gone that day, he was as pitiful as a child when he heard that the porridge was gone that day. She didn’t care about him. She planned to leave. Even though he had said those words, even if he had clearly let her know, she still planned to leave.
The doctor said that this kind of pain had a lot to do with one’s emotional state. He was in so much pain he kept on vomiting and then fainted. Du Xiaosu originally thought he had just fallen asleep again. It was only when the nurse came in that she realized he had passed out from pain, so they injected him with analgesics.
She felt her heart soften again, becoming gentle. She couldn’t just leave him like this. But that secretive thought made her uneasy to the extreme. She finally became suspicious of her recent physical condition, but she had to find a way to confirm it. If something went wrong, she could only leave quietly.
But she still tried to maintain the present state. After Lei Yuzheng woke up, she tried her best to make herself behave more naturally, even trying to get closer to him, but he was not friendly to her, and even stopped talking to her. He became irritable, impatient, and often locked himself in the room. She found that he even smoked more vigorously. The housekeeper was anxious. Du Xiaosu could only think of a solution on her own. She hid the lighter and all the cigarettes. When he couldn’ find them, he finally was willing to talk to her: “Hand them over!”
“Give me some time.” She seemed to say calmly, “You can’t ask me to accept it all at once.”
He ignored her, but didn’t try to furiously find the cigarettes.
The weather was good on this day. She finally coaxed him to go out on the balcony to get some calcium, but he selfishly sat in the wicker chair and read the newspaper. The sun was very fine in the autumn. The sky was high and the clouds were light. The wind seemed to smell of fallen leaves. She kept on telling him: “Don’t read anymore. It will hurt your eyes.” He moved into the shadow of the marble railing and continued to read.
She pointed to the garden downstairs: “Look, a stray cat.”
He really put the newspaper down and looked down the balcony. There were small animals in the flower bushes. The branches of the bushes shook. But he immediately understood that he was fooled. In these heavily guarded luxury villa areas, where even mosquitos were excluded, where could a stray cat come from?
Sure enough, the little thing came out and he saw that it was the new pet dog of the neighbor next door, wagging its tail and barking at them. After a while, the neighbor’s maid also followed the sound and came over. She smiled and apologized to the housekeeper: “I’m sorry. This little fellow slipped over in the blink of an eye. Please tell Mr. Lei and Mrs. Lei that I’m really sorry.”
Watching her watch the people take the puppy away, she seemed melancholic. Recently, she seemed to want to please him. Although he didn’t understand her purpose, seeing her expression as she looked at the dog, he remembered very long ago, that faraway island. She had once pitifully begged to keep that scrawny kitten. At that time, her eyes were foggy, as if there was always water vapor, like she had just cried.
He said involuntarily: “Why don’t you raise one?”
She only felt a headache coming. Her current days were worse than working. She had to take care of this large house and all sorts of matters, serve this young master, if there was an added dog…
“I don’t like dogs.”
“You just like cats.”
She was a little surprised: “How do you know?”
He harrumphed and said nothing.
At dusk, the neighbors specially sent someone to send a basket of fruit and wrote a card personally, saying that the puppy had just been bought, which was why such a thing had occurred. They deeply expressed their apologies and were terribly polite. The housekeeper accepted the fruit, told her this event as usual, and then suggested to her: “The kitchen has freshly baked cakes. There are children in the neighbor’s house. We can send some cakes to them in reciprocity.”
She quite agreed with this. There were only a dozen families in this huge region. It is rare to have a harmonious neighborhood.
A few days later, she accompanied Lei Yuzheng to the check-up. When she came back, she happened to run into the neighbor’s wife and her child. The driver went to park the car, while the mother and daughter came over to greet them and thank them again. It turned out that this was the mother and daughter pair who were feeding the ducklings by the lake that day. The little girl was very well-educated. At such a young age, she was very polite. She first called them uncle and auntie. Then she smiled sweetly, “Thank you, auntie for the cake that day. It’s better than my mother’s baking.”
The neighbor’s wife also laughed: “After a few days in the baking class, I came back to bake a cake for her, but she was not happy to try it. After the cakes you guys sent over arrived, she kept on complimenting how delicious it was and wanted to have me learn from Mrs. Lei.”
Du Xiaosu was taken aback: “You misunderstand…”
“She didn’t bake it.” Lei Yuzheng gave a rare smile, “The cake was baked by our pastry chef. I will ask him to copy the recipe to you when we get back.”
“Thank you.” The neighbor’s wife smiled and asked Du Xiaosu again, “That time at the lake, I noticed that you were very uncomfortable. I wanted to send you to the hospital, but you refused. Why don’t I introduce you to an old Chinese medicine doctor to do a check-up. He is also quite good at treating stomach problems.”
Du Xiaosu’s face changed, and she smiled reluctantly, “It’s okay. I’m better now. It’s just an old problem.”
“You still have to pay attention. From how it seemed that day, you might have a lot of stomach acid. I was like that for a while. I thought it was a child, but it was just a false alarm.” After a few more words, the neighbor’s wife then said goodbye and left with her daughter.
As soon as they entered the living room, a servant greeted them, brought them slippers, and took Lei Yuzheng’s windbreaker. Du Xiaosu went upstairs, back to her room, yet who knew Lei Yuzheng would follow her inside. Recently, he had treated her as if she wasn’t there, but today, his face was dark. She couldn’t help but block the doorway, “I’m going to take a nap.”
He didn’t speak, but went straight to the drawer. There were some of her personal belongings in it, so she was very angry: “What are you doing?”
He still didn’t speak, and went to get her bag again. She didn’t let him touch it: “What do you want?”
He stood there without moving, and finally asked: “You are not well. Why didn’t you go to the hospital?”
“Why do I need to go to the hospital for minor problems?”
“Where are you not feeling well?”
“It’s none of your business.”
“Then follow me to the hospital for an examination.”
“We just came back from the hospital. Why do we need to go to the hospital again?”
“What are you afraid of?”
“What am I afraid of?”
“Yes, what are you afraid of?”
She gradually felt a little short of breath. He looked at her, his gaze was as sharp as an arrow. He seemed to want to find her weak spot and stab at it, forcing her to struggle desperately. She grabbed her handbag and tightened her fingers involuntarily. She said with a cold voice: “Get out of the way.”