I became hungry again. So, I made ramen for three people. Itâs fresh noodles, so it tastes better than instant ramen. I boiled it with vegetables for about two minutes.\n
âDonât add bean sprouts.â\n
Thatâs what my dad told me, but I ignored him and put the bean sprouts, cabbage, and boiled egg in the bowl.\n
âBean sprouts and ramen donât mix.â\n
âThey usually go well with ramen.â\n
According to my father, ramen and bean sprouts share a common feature: they are both long and thin. But they have completely different textures, so when you eat them, they cancel out each otherâs goodness.\n
âThey just donât go together.â\n
As a last resort, he tried to eat the bean sprouts and noodles separately. Thatâs why he eats very slowly. He scoops up the noodles with his chopsticks and moves them up and down to remove the bean sprouts whenever they stick to his plate.\n
âItâs fine already. If you donât eat quickly, the noodles will stretch.â\n
âItâs okay. Iâm fine with this.â\n
He continued to eat. In the meantime, Sayaka had finished all the ramen. After slurping up the soup a couple of times, she carried the dishes to the sink.\n
âThanks for the food.â\n
She brushed her teeth and went upstairs. I finished eating soon after, but my dad hadnât even finished half of his.\n
âBean sprouts, bean sproutsâŚâŚâ\n
âJust how much do you hate it?â\n
I washed the bowls for me and Sayaka and wiped them with a dish towel, yet he still kept separating the sprouts from the noodles. If this is the case, I should not have added the bean sprouts. To tell the truth, I also felt sorry for my father, who was slouching his back and moving his chopsticks.\n
When I returned to the living room after brushing my teeth, he had finally finished eating. I quickly collected the bowl, washed it, and put it back in the cupboard.\n
âFor Godâs sake, please donât put the sprouts in there.â\n
He told me as he cleaned the space between my teeth with his fingers. I thought it was dirty but replied that I understood.\n
My father turned on the TV. A lunchtime program was just starting.\n
âBrush your teeth later, Dadâ\n
Sure.. my father replied. He wonât be getting cavities, but sometimes he neglects to brush his teeth after meals.\n
I went back upstairs and went into my room.\n\n\n
I had to study for the midterm exam, but I also had to think about what I would do afterward.\n
I remembered Yamazakiâs story.\n
(I often see them making noise at the riverbed. Probably gathering around 8 p.m.)\n
The place he told me about was off the main street. Yamazaki didnât know what they were doing. He said that they were probably smoking cigarettes or drinking alcohol that they had bought with the money they had mugged.\n
There were usually about six or seven of them hanging out. It was close to the number of people we had gotten into trouble with at the arcade. It was probably the same group of people that always got together. If they have repeatedly mugged people at schools and arcade games, itâs no surprise that they have been arrested before.\n
In the end, he didnât tell me what their names were. However, I feel that there is nothing to be done even if I hear it. I donât really want to get involved with them anyway. Once Iâm done with this, I want to make sure that we never have to talk again.\n
My first priority is to ensure Sayakaâs safety. I have to do something to discourage them from taking revenge.\n
To some extent, I had a solid idea of what to do.\n
The riverbed I was told to go to was about a half-hour walk from here. It was a surprisingly long distance. It was also far from the station, so no one would stop by unless there was something wrong.\n
Probably, if I make a little noise, nothing will be said.\n
I sowed this seed myself. I need to reap them myself.\n
I tried to wear clothes that I donât mind getting dirty. I often wear casual shirts and jeans, but today I need to use something else. One by one, I took out the clothes I had put in the back.\n
And then I found it.\n
It was something I used to wear when I was a delinquent. It was black with fancy decorations. It had a hood, so if I put it on, people wouldnât be able to see that much of my face. Also, I donât care if it gets dirty or torn now. Iâm not attached to this outfit at all.\n
This should be fine.\n
I thought Iâd never wear it again. I wondered why I hadnât thrown it away yet. Was it because I thought that one day this day would come? Or was it because I thought I should not throw it away as proof of my former sins?\n
I closed my eyes. I used to wear this dress and spend all my time fighting. Gradually, I had come to be feared just for wearing it. I felt good about that. It made me feel like I was special.\n
Now, I feel like it was a stupid idea.\n
I had no idea what I was doing. I mistakenly thought that the stronger I got in a fight, the more satisfied I would be. I was under the false delusion that a bright future awaited me as I pushed forward.\n
I opened my eyes.\n
But itâs different now. I can see what I have to do. I know that there are things that I need to do.\n
At night, Iâll start moving.\n\n
I wonder what will happen tonight. I couldnât even imagine it.\n\n