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Chapter 4 â Persuading Mother Enami\nVolume 2\n<hr class="wp-block-separator is-style-wide">\nâBut even though Iâm trying to live my life like that, not caring about the things that donât matter, Iâve been feeling very tired lately. Strangely, there are more things I donât care about.â\n
âIs-Is that so?â\n
âYes. I really want to sleep all dayâŠI guess thatâs what it means to be old.â\n\n
As I listened to her, I wondered if it was really âsomething she doesnât care aboutâ.\n
It wasnât that it didnât matter, but that she tried to âbelieveâ that it didnât. And the reason she did so was that it was more painful if she didnât deceive herself. But as a result of looking away, she remained this person without any change.\n\n
ââŠYou are the same age as Risa, arenât you?â\n
âYes.â\n
âAs you get older, you will understand. Even if you donât understand it now.â\n\n
I nodded in silence.\n\n
âThe older you get, the more things you have. But itâs very rare for someone to live with everything. Everyone has to make a choice somewhere. Or, even if we donât choose to, some things just fall out of our grasp. When you live like this, the things that are important to you as a young person may seem unimportant to you. Or vice versa.â\n\n
Mother Enami turned her head away from me and coughed twice.\n\n
âDo you understand what Iâm saying?â\n\n
I wasnât sure how to answer. I think I understood what she was trying to say, but I donât think I understood what was hidden behind it. In the end, I just replied vaguely, âWellâ and that was it.\n
And then. Suddenly, Mother Enami stopped talking.\n\n
ââŠâŠâ\n\n
She was looking at me with a blank expression. Her gaze pierced straight through me to the point of being frightening.\n
I panicked inwardly. I wondered if I had said something wrong. Was it wrong to reply, âWellâ ?. When I was desperately trying to figure out what I should do to fix it, mother Enami laughed as if she was about to erupt.\n\n
âFu, FufuâŠâ\n
âAh, um, whatâs itâŠ?â\n\n
Apparently, she wasnât mad at me. As I felt the tension dissipate, I couldnât control the feeling of confusion that came next. I really canât read what this person is thinking.\n
She doesnât give me an answer right away. She laughed for a while, and then looked back at me.\n\n
âYou are really interestingâŠâ\n
âEh?â\n
âYou see, you show everything youâre thinking on your face.â\n\n
I remembered that Enami-san had said the same thing to me.\n\n
âIs it that obvious?â\n
âYes. Even now.â\n\n
I touched my own face, but I couldnât tell what kind of face I was making.\n\n
âYeah, thatâs true. It will be troubling to hear all this.â\n
Strangely enough, Mother Enami was now in the best mood ever. Maybe she was just happy that I was listening to her.\n
⊠She was also probably just a normal mother at the beginning. I was suddenly reminded of the obvious. If you only look at her now, she looks like just a kind person.\n\n
âI have taken a liking to youâ\n\n
Suddenly, she told me that.\n\n
âRisa, who is not very good at socializing, opened up to you. Iâm sure She likes you too.â\n
â⊠Even so, sheâs always talking badly to me.â\n
âThatâs just the way she is. Donât let it bother you.â\n\n
When I heard those words, I realized. That her daughter was not âsomething she didnât care aboutâ.\n
I might have moved up in rank from âinsignificantâ to ânot insignificantâ.\n\n
â⊠Weâll probably be done with cleaning today.â\n\n
Mother Enami only gave a small nod.\n\n
ââMother might deny it, though. But, I think the reason why your cold has not gone away is that this place was not the optimal place for you. Itâs clean now, but thereâs no point if it gets dirty again.â\n\n
I wondered if my words had been heard. I had no idea, but I had to say it anyway.\n\n
âYou may not want to be affected by trash that you donât care about. But itâs necessary. Thatâs why we came here to clean it up.â\n\n
I feel as if the words are cutting through the air. It made me wonder if what we did was meaningless.\n
After all, Iâve only touched the surface of this personâs mind. I havenât found or solved anything that lies deeper. This is the best I can do right nowâŠ\n\n
Finally, I said.\n\n
âPlease put some effort for yourself, too.â\n\n
Mother Enamiâs face lost all emotion. For this person, the messiness of the room is not important. Thatâs probably why she canât understand what Iâm saying.\n
At the end of a long silence that made me feel as if time had stopped again, Mother Enami looked away and said only one thing.\n\n
âIâll think about it.â\n\n
I couldnât tell if those words meant progress or stagnation.\n\n
<hr class="wp-block-separator is-style-wide">\nTN: Thatâs the end of the chapter⊠Next up is the final (among available) chapter⊠I might as well take a break.\n\n