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Chapter 155
I don't want Miyagi to know about this — 155
Translated by KaiesV
Edited by KaiesV
The weather was bad even though it was Saturday night.
I open the curtains a little and look outside. The wind is blowing so hard that I think a typhoon is coming, and the rain is pounding the windowpane with such force that I wonder if it is a typhoon. Outside the window, where only a street lamp stands lonely, it looks as if zombies or something could be walking around. If I go outside now, I might run into something other than people.
I close the curtains, thinking of something that might make Miyagi angry if she hears it.
「I think, I’ll just watch a movie.」
The weather forecast is for rain tomorrow, and there’s nothing to do when you wake up early, so I turned on my tablet. I get my earphones ready and play a horror movie. It’s perfect for nights like this.
It would be nice if I could invite Miyagi to watch it with me, but if I let her watch a horror movie, she would surely resent me for the rest of her life. Besides, it seems unlikely that Miyagi would come to my room in the middle of the night like this.
Within thirty minutes of starting playback, I was thirsty.
As I pour a glass of barley tea in the common area and return to my room, I hear a heavy rumbling sound coming from outside the window. It was clearly the sound of thunder, and after clearing my throat I opened the curtains a bit to see the sky glowing in the distance.
「I thought Miyagi was safe from thunderstorms.」
From memory, I think I heard that she was not good at it in high school.
I look at the clock.
It’s time to go to bed.
If she was asleep without noticing the lightning, I will wake her up. When I think about it, I feel like I shouldn’t go check on her.
But I am concerned about Miyagi.
I go around the room.
Today I had a dream.
It was a dream in which the part that had been deceptive until now became clear, and it was somehow difficult to go to Miyagi’s room. I no longer have trouble making eye contact, but I feel restless.
Low sounds can be heard intermittently from outside.
I wonder for a few minutes what to do.
In the end, I don’t have the option of not going, so I go to the front of Miyagi’s room.
I took two deep breaths.
With one tap on the door.
Miyagi doesn’t answer.
Maybe she is sleeping after all.
I think I should go back, but I can’t move my legs to think about what would have happened if I had stayed awake. I’m worried, I want to see her face, and I still feel like I shouldn’t see her face. Lost again after being lost before I left the room, I slammed the door harder than before.
One time, two times.
I waited a bit, but Miyagi didn’t come out.
As I was about to give up and go back to my room, the door opened.
「…Sendai-san, are you still awake?」
Miyagi, dressed in a sweatshirt, says in a sleepy but not cumbersome voice.
「I was watching a movie. Miyagi, are you okay with thunder?」
「I’m okay.」
「Didn’t you say before that you weren’t good at that?」
「…I’m not good at it, but I’m not afraid of it.」
Miyagi, who says so, appears to look much the same as usual. Even when she hears a rumbling sound, her complexion doesn’t seem to change.
「I see. That’s good.」
I am relieved and disappointed.
As I said「good night」to Miyagi, keeping my contradictory feelings to the inside of my chest, I heard a sharp sound as if thunder had struck nearby. Miyagi’s hand grabs my arm and quickly pulls away.
I wish I could touch her more.
If the thunder were louder, it might grab my hand and not let go.
I call out to Miyagi, thinking that it is hard to believe that I came to check on her out of concern.
「Are you okay?」
Aren’t you scared? If I asked her what she said, Miyagi would surely say that she wasn’t scared, and she might close the door and never come out again.
「I was just surprised by the noise.」
「Do you want to come to my room?」
Miyagi does not reply.
She seems to be wary of me.
「If you can’t sleep, how about a movie to pass the time?」
When I added to convey that the words had no deep meaning, Miyagi came out of the room saying in a small voice,「I’ll watch.」I invite her to come out of her room, but I was surprised that she comes out of her room honestly. Miyagi follows me as I walk and we enter my room together. We sat down together with the bed as a backdrop, and Miyagi reached for the tablet he had left on the table.
「What were you watching?」
Before I can answer, Miyagi presses the play button. I could hear faint music stirring my anxiety through the earphones that remained connected, and Miyagi stopped the screen that had just started moving as if in a panic.
「If you’re watching something weird, just tell me first.」
Miyagi kicks me in the ankle area.
It’s unreasonable.
It’s not my fault.
「Before I could say it, Miyagi played it back. And for the most part, it’s not a weird one, it’s a horror movie.」
「People say horror stories are weird. I didn’t think you’re watching horror on a day like this.」
「It’s because of this weather, isn’t it? Perfect atmosphere, don’t you think?」
「I’m afraid something might come in through the window, you know?」
Miyagi says something that sounds like she mean it and held her knees.
Sitting in gymnastics and rounding her back, she looks like a stray cat that is frightened at the sight of humans. It is tempting to reach out and touch it and say, “It’s okay,” but if I really reach out, she will run away before I can touch her like a cat.
「Miyagi can just pick a movie that you wanted to see.」
When I said this, she looked at me, not at the tablet.
「Sendai-san, do you go home for summer vacation?」
「I’m not going home, but what about Miyagi?」
「I’m not going home.」
「Okay.」
The conversation breaks down.
Miyagi doesn’t look for the film, but instead flops down on the floor with her hands holding her knees.
「…Why Sendai-san doesn’t want to go home?」
「Nhn— Maybe it’s because I feel more comfortable here than at home. My parents have no concern about me. What about Miyagi? Do your parents not concern about you?」
「Maybe they’re worried.」
「Then why don’t you go home?」
「Because there is no point in going back… My parents are rarely home for summer vacation.」
Rarely does Miyagi talk about home.
Neither of us had much to say about our families.
For me, family was not something I actively wanted to talk about, and probably Miyagi is no different. I have never been able to ask her about her family, and she has never answered me properly. I don’t know why she suddenly told me something that she had always dodged before, but the fact that she told me just a little bit about something that should not have been something she wanted to talk about made me feel closer to Miyagi than usual.
I look at her hands, which are flat on the floor.
I reach for it.
But before our hands touch, Miyagi turns her body toward me.
「Sendai-san.」
She called my name and wait a bit.
But Miyagi doesn’t speak the words that follow.
She looks like she wanted to say something, but she kept her mouth shut.
「If you have something to say, say it.」
「…Promise me you won’t do anything weird.」
Miyagi says in a low voice.
「Is the weirdest thing you’ve ever seen like a horror movie?」
「No, it’s not. You know what I’m talking about.」
I know.
The weird things Miyagi says are just things I dreamed about, and I don’t intend to do them without being told. It’s not that I don’t want to recreate the dream, but if I tried to recreate such a thing now, Miyagi would leave this room, and I don’t want to do that.
「I promise. Do I swear on the earrings?」
Miyagi gives a small nod.
I tuck Miyagi’s hair behind her ear and bring my lips to mine.
「I won’t do that kind of thing for now.」
I whispered in her ear and kisses her flower earring. Then I crawls my lips under the ear and sets my teeth on the neck. The sweet scent of shampoo is comforting. Biting her neck loosely and softly, Miyagi pushed my body.
「You said you wouldn’t do anything weird. What do you mean you won’t do it now?」
「Now that’s part of the vow, Miyagi, because you didn’t say forever.」
「Sendai-san, why are you so quick to say stupid things like that?」
「Perhaps, it’s because I’m stupid?」
「…This is done.」
Miyagi says dismissively and leans back on the bed.
「Can we hold hands?」
The answer isn’t returned.
Miyagi silently takes the tablet from the table. Then, she puts her shoulder to it.
Relieved at the distance of body heat, I looked at the tablet screen and saw that the horror movie I was watching had disappeared and a Japanese movie from years ago was displayed.
「It’s a little quiet out there, isn’t it?」
I say without looking at her.
The low rumbling sound is still there, but I can no longer hear the sharp sound that could have broken through the wall.
「What about the rain?」
「It’s not raining. What will you do?」
Is she going back to her room?
I didn’t want to ask.
I would like to keep Miyagi locked up in this room.
「What will I do, you ask?」
「Nothing. Nevermind that.」
「Sendai-san, can I watch this?」
Miyagi points to the tablet screen.
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Pause
Unmute
「That’s fine.」
When Miyagi replied, she removed the earphone she had left plugged in and pressed the play button.