When I came home with mixed feelings, I found no one at home, which was unusual for those days.
Normally, Azusa or even Yuzuki would be home every day.
My childhood friend Yuzuki had been cooking for us since our parents went abroad. So on this day, too, I assumed that she was home as a matter of course.
āIām home⦠anyone home?ā
It was late in the evening, and the house was dark. I called out to see if anyone was home just to be sure, but no one was there.
ā⦠Where did they go?ā
I muttered to myself and turned on the living room light.
Then I found what looked like a letter on the table. Next to it was my house key, and when I realized⦠that it was the duplicate key I had given to Yuzuki, I hurriedly picked up the letter.
I was surprised to see the letter in my hand.
I was so nervous because I had never seen a letter like this before.
āTo Kotaro-san. I have decided to stop cooking for you from today. Please accept my apology and I will pay you back for the food and other expenses you have given me later.ā
But the letter didnāt say why.
I couldnāt stand still, so I decided to visit her house.
Itās not that I was worried that she wouldnāt cook for meā¦
I was simply surprised by Yuzukiās sudden behavior.
It seemed to me like she was making a decision as if she was bothered by my relationship with her, and I was a little scared of it.
This was probably influenced by the Kirari incident.
I was in a strange hurry at the time.
Thatās probably why I went to Yuzukiās house without thinking.
ā⦠Oh? Kotaro-san, whatās wrong?ā
I rang the doorbell and she came immediately. Her expression was nonchalant, as if nothing had happened.
Her attitude was so normal that I was more puzzled than she was.
āN-no⦠I was a little freaked out because I read ⦠the letter, so whatās up ⦠with you all of a sudden? Iām not sure if Iāve done anything wrong, but Iād like to apologize.ā
When I told her that, Yuzuki gave a small smile and shook her head.
āNo, you didnāt do anything wrong, okay? There is no need to apologize.ā
āIf thatās the case, then why did you suddenly say you wouldnāt come to my house? If you donāt want to come, thatās fineā¦, but if Iāve put a burden on you or something, I want you to let me apologize to you properly. Please tell me how you honestly feel.ā
I didnāt understand.
I did not understand Yuzukiās change of heart.
I wanted to know.
I wanted to find out what made her uncomfortable.
I was hurt because of it.
āā¦Thatās the thing.ā
At my words, Yuzukiās smile instantly disappeared.
The smile she had just given me might have been an insincere smile.
My words had triggered a slightly annoyed expression on her face, and then she revealed her true feelings to me.
āI donāt like it because you donāt do anything.ā
āā¦Eh?ā
I was not expecting those words, but they pierced my heart.
Seeing me like that, Yuzuki sighed in disgust.
āHah,⦠you never do anything that you have to apologize for, Kotaro,⦠so I donāt think it matters whether Iām there or not. Weāve been together since we were little, but weāve only ever had the kind of relationship where weāve never fought or argued.ā
It was, after all, the same feeling of ādisappointmentā as Kirari.
āI wanted you to give me a lot of trouble. I wanted you to think that I would accept you even if you were selfish. ā¦Kotaro-san, you are a person who doesnāt move much emotionally no matter what I do for you. Thatās what I didnāt like about you. ā¦I like someone who needs me more.ā
The words of her intention were so clear that they cut deeply into my heart.
But let me say this.
Itās not that I was emotionally detached.
I was happy and grateful.
But I didnāt know how to express it.
Maybe thatās why Yuzuki thought I looked bored no matter what I didā¦