Facing such a gentle child was akin to facing Gu Beiyue. But Qin Min could refuse the latter, while she could never reject the former.
âAll right,â she said, âWe wonât bother with him.â She picked little Shadow up to sit on her legs and snuggle in her arms. She would never forget the first time she saw him or how timid and shy he was; nor could she forget how little Shadow had been waiting for her at the gates when she came back from Medical City.
His nanny said the child had been sitting there every evening after coming back from Yunning to await her return. The very day she got off the carriage, he had threw himself into her arms with the cry of, âFoster mother!â
But now he was five and didnât call her that anymore. Instead, he would softly and sweetly call her âMother,â âMother dearest,â or when he was seriousââMom.â[1] Looking at the letter in mother dearestâs hand, Shadow asked, âMother, father wrote a letter again?â
âMm,â Qin Min replied.
Shadow thought it over and asked, âMother dearest, what does father look like?â
The number of times Shadow had seen Gu Beiyue could be counted on his fingers. After he turned two, he never saw him again. His memories were fuzzy and all he knew was that he wasnât father or motherâs son by blood.
Qin Min thought for a while before pointing at the moon. âHeâs like that.â
Shadow looked up for a bit but didnât understand. âWhere am I looking?â
âLook at the moon,â Qin Min said seriously.
Shadow was confused. âHe looks like the moon?â
âIs the moon pretty?â Qin Min asked.
âIt is,â Shadow replied without hesitation.
âYour father is like the moon, very good-looking,â Qin Min said before breaking into a smile. While mother and son were talking, Xi Yubo found them.\nâMadam, itâs time for the young master to go to bed. He still needs to get up early tomorrow for his exercises.â
When Gu Beiyue left, he had only warned Xi Yubo once. Now he treated Qin Min like he treated Gu Beiyue, with nothing but respect without daring to act reckless.
âDoesnât Shadow know everything already? All of you combined werenât enough to catch him. As I see it, you can dismiss everyone and leave Shadow here, heâs sufficient.â Qin Min was half-serious half-joking, making it difficult for Xi Yubo to read her true intentions.
He only gave a silly grin and replied, âMadam, the young master has good innate talent and learns quickly.â
âAs long as you know. Later on, let Beiyue change his teachers to instruct him. Have Shadow rest in the interim,â Qin Min said.
Xi Yubo was in a tough spot. He always felt that Shadow hadnât trained well enough, but it was hard to cross her.
âYes, yes!â he agreed first and thought about how to report to his master later.
At this moment, Shadow suddenly jumped out of Qin Minâs arms and onto the ground. He was very serious as he cried, âSomeone come, protect the Madam! Thereâs an intruder!â As he spoke, he flittered to the right.
Qin Min and Xi Yubo both realized the intruder must be extraordinary to enter the grounds surrounded by guards. But after a while, they didnât see anyone coming to protect her. Instead, they spotted a large and small figure chasing each other on the roof. The taller one made Qin Min gape and rub her eyes to make sure she wasnât seeing things. But Xi Yubo quickly blurted out, âItâs Master, Masterâs returned.â
Right, it was Gu Beiyue!
Qin Min would likely never forget his figure beneath the moon. She had just received his letter and medicinal dregs today, so how was he back in person? She stared at the familiar figure and lost all train of thought. All she did was stare and stareâŚ\nGu Beiyue could clearly slow down to let Shadow chase him. At first the distance between them was huge, but he gradually slowed until Shadow was following close behind. He had originally planned to maintain a certain distance with the child to provoke him, but when their proximity shrank, Shadow stopped chasing to backtrack and land by Qin Minâs side. Surprised, Gu Beiyue looked back to see Qin Min and Shadow standing beneath the tree under the moonlight, looking back at him.
Three years had passed. Little Shadow had grown up, but there wasnât much change to Qin Min besides getting a bit thinner. Gu Beiyue stood on the roof while bathed in moonlight that washed away his travel stains and made the white robes look especially pure. He stared and stared at Qin Min and sonâŚ.but didnât chase over.
Shadow took his motherâs hand and murmured, âMother.â
âMm?â Qin Min recovered her wits.
Shadow was silent before he murmured again, âMother, the moon fell down.â
Qin Min looked up subconsciously, but only saw the moon hanging high in the silent night sky. She murmured back, âNo, the moon is stillâŚâ Halfway through her sentence, she recovered her wits. What is all this, ah.
She grew earnest instead. âShadow, your father is back.â
âMother, he tricked me on purpose,â Shadow might not be a early prodigy like other children, but Qin Minâs personal instruction in the past three years had made him smart and introspective.
âNo, he was testing the depths of your lightness techniques,â Qin Min said.
Even though Shadow remained calm, he was still a kid in the end and grew nervous. âMother, I didnât catch up to him.â
Qin Min lost her wits again and muttered to herself, âI canât catch him either.â
âBut you donât know martial arts,â Shadow looked up with a childish face full of confusion.\nQin Min once again came back to her senses and quickly comforted him. âYouâre still little. In the future youâll definitely catch him.â
Shadow trusted his motherâs words most of all and was filled with self-confidence. He said seriously, âMother, if father runs away in the future, Iâll help you chase him back, okay?â
A while later, Qin Min replied with a sentence that didnât fit the question at all. She said, âHeâs gotten much thinner.â
âMother, why hasnât father come over yet?â Shadow asked next.
Qin Min didnât even think before she spoke. âI donât know, you should ask him.â
Unexpectedly, Shadow quickly flashed over to Gu Beiyue before she could stop him. She was about to run after him when she saw Gu Beiyue kneeling in front of the child and stopped. The sight softened her heart and turned her quiet. She trusted that this man with a heart as cold as ice would never harm a child.
Gu Beiyue carefully studied Shadowâs face, never expecting the timid child from the past would be bold enough to stand in front of him and stare. He chuckled gently and asked, âLittle Shadow, do you know who I am?â
Shadow nodded earnestly and studied his fatherâs features without a word.
âWho am I?â Gu Beiyue asked.
Little Shadow seemed lost in thought though his mind was a mystery. Gu Beiyue didnât push him, but waited patiently. But Shadow took so long that eventually he asked, âSince you know, why are you still thinking about it?â
Only then did Shadow reply, âYou are the head of the Shadow Clan, the teacher to the crown prince, and the leader of the Department of Medicine.â Mother had told him all about what kind of person his father was.
Besides surprise, Gu Beiyue actually felt a twinge of pain in his heart. He subconsciously gathered Shadow over to lean against the crook of his arm. Little Shadow had long gotten over his fear of strangers and was even less fearful of his âfather.â Over the past three years, mother had told him all too much about fatherâs affairs. He even wrote a few lines to âfatherâ in her letters multiple times.\nâWhat else?â Gu Beiyue asked.
What he wanted was âfather,â but Shadow only said, âAnd youâre also mother dearestâs moon.â
Gu Beiyue gave a start and subconsciously looked towards Qin Min, who immediately averted her eyes. He took, looked away and said softly, âAnything else?â
Little Shadow thought for a while before finally shaking his head. âThatâs all I know.â
Gu Beiyue picked Shadow up and stared at him seriously. âIâm also Gu Nanchenâs father.â
Qin Min wanted him to give little Shadow a name, so he had been pondering that the entire time. But after returning from Medical City, she didnât let him do it anymore and named Shadow âNanchenâ on her own.
Nanchen (ĺčž°). The words meant âthe stars of the southern border.â As to the meaning of the name, she didnât say and he didnât ask.
Beiyue Nanchen (ĺćĺčž°). Northern moon, southern stars. Anyone who heard his name with little Shadowâs could guess the boyâs status. He had replied Qin Min instantly with a letter that read, âGood!â
Seeing his father so earnest, Shadow suddenly split his lips into a grin. Only then did Gu Beiyue realized his sonâs smile was radiant.
Little Shadow exclaimed, âYouâve always been father! Do I have to say it too?â
Gu Beiyue was struck speechless and laughed out loud. Suddenly, he felt that everything was very simple, as if all the complexities could be sorted and smoothed out by this childâs innocent words.
Shadow stopped smiling and said, âFather, Iâve finally seen you. I really missed you.â
Gu Beiyue was filled with guilt. Although he kept in touch with letters, he owed this child too much for being busy for three years. Biological or not, he was still his father. Holding him tightly, he said in a gentle voice, âFather missed you too.â\nâDid father miss mother?â Shadow asked.
Gu Beiyue paused but quickly replied, âMm, her too.â
âFather, why arenât you coming down yet? Motherâs been waiting for a long time, you canât just let her stand. Her legs will get sore.â
âMm,â Gu Beiyue replied without much else. He carried Shadow to fly down and slowly land in front of Qin Min. The two met gazes and broke into slight smiles at the same time. Coincidentally, both of them looked away after that. Shadow looked at his mother, then at his father, before quickly whispering in Gu Beiyueâs ear, âFather, mother looks at the moon everyday, so she misses you everyday.â
When Gu Beiyue looked at Qin Min again, his eyes subconsciously drifted down from her face to study her from head to toe. He discovered that she looked even thinner close up.
âFather, mother was still looking at the moon just then. Iâm not lying,â Shadow emphasized in a low voice.
1. Hard to differentiate but just know these go from More Formal > Less Formal. The Chinese equivalents are ĺ¨ niang, ĺ¨äş˛ niang qin, ćŻäş˛ muqin. Technically theyâre all âmotherâ but I had to differentiate in English somehow!\n