Outaishihi ni Nante Naritakunai!! Chapter 184
She and Her Boyfriendâs Intention
Unintentionally I started humming.
Yesterday I finally noticed my feelings for Freed, and we happily confirmed our love for each other.
Various things happened at that time, and well, how should I put it, far from all night, I was embraced until the noon of the next day.
Under the guise of punishment, just as he declared I was sweetly melted to a mush.
Honestly, he didnât do anything cruel. But, he kept making me feel so good I became silly.
⊠In a sense, that might be tougher.
No matter how many times I cried that itâs impossible, I was told âItâs a punishment, so nopeâ, and sucking up my tears he continued slowly rocking. And as he did, a strange pleasure ran through my body, and I came in the twinkling of an eye.
Or rather, itâs like I was almost constantly coming while being embraced.
Even so, my body was honest. Hearing Freed say âI love youâ in a sweet voice, I tightened around him. He accepted my begging, and laughing âFineâ he unleashed his passion into my deep place.
Iâm not sure what happened near the end, but even if I say so myself, I did a good job not passing out.
Anyway, I was outrageously embraced like that⊠But, surprisingly I felt happy about it.
The time I clung to him while he gave me sweet words and pleased me⊠How should I put it⊠I felt happy that I was desired, and could actually feel that I am loved.
Whenever he told me he loves me and I replied with similar words, he smiled with a face of utmost happiness.
Happy about it more than anything ⊠I ultimately responded to everything.
Yup. Call me an idiot if you want.
However, despite doing it so much, my physical condition was very good. I was drowsy from the lack of sleep and physically tired, but fundamentally I was well.
⊠No, well, until I drank the medicine my hips were in just a little pain⊠But strangely the essential place didnât hurt at all despite doing it so much.
⊠Yup. Really, itâs dreadful Iâm getting used to it.
If it was me before, I think I absolutely wouldnât be able to go along with it, and surely my whole body would be so sore I couldnât move.
Anyway, since I was helpless against the lack of sleep, after Freed left for work I went to sleep for about three hours. Afterwards, when I had a meal that Clara brought, I was brimming with vigor. I can go anywhere! My state recovered by that much.
âPrincess Consort. You are in a considerably good mood. Did something good happen?â
While I was having the court ladies change my clothes, Clara asked so with a smile.
âWellâ I vaguely laughed it away. I donât think she would believe me if I said that we communicated our feelings only this late.
At any rate, it seems the common understanding among Clara and the other court ladies is that weâve loved each other from the startâŠ
No matter how much I didnât notice, itâs embarrassing there were all sorts of leaks to the surroundings. But, the situation is what it is. I decided to take a nonchalant attitude.
Because, weâre actually lovers nowââââ.
Using that phrase, I felt completely embarrassed.
Since yesterday, perhaps deliberately Freedâs been excessively using the word âloversâ.
Each time I become a little embarrassed. I would want him to stop, but I certainly feel just a little happy about it, so in the end I couldnât ask him to.
âAah, something happened with His Highness, right? We are relieved your relationship is as good as everâ
While I was reminiscing, Clara made a guess and nodded with a self-satisfied face.
Something did happen, but how should I put it, itâs too embarrassing.
âItâs, itâs not like thatâ
I instinctively denied, but without minding at all Clara laughed.
The court lady who was combing my hair also slipped out a giggle, and happily said.
âAgain with such a thing. His Highness too left in a very good moodâŠ. And, itâs finished. Lady Claraâ
âYeah. Princess Consort, please put on this coat todayâ
When I received a thin coat from Clara, I tilted my head. Iâm wearing a dress with the same design as always that shows the Kingâs Flower. I donât get why I should expressly put on a coat.
When I asked her finding it strange, Clara averted her eyes from me. Her face was a little red.
âUmm⊠Today they⊠stand out just a little more than usualâŠâ
As I understood what Clara wanted to say, this time I turned bright red.
In other words, itâs about, um⊠the kiss marks Freed persistently left last night.
I thought he was careful to leave them at the back, but I wonder if they are so noticeable.
Those on my chest are more or less hidden by my dress, but I donât know about my back. But, judging from Claraâs behavior, theyâre probably quite noticeable. When I looked around, all the court ladies were also hanging their heads in embarrassment.
Remembering him fervently sucking on my skin last night, I shut up and put on the coat.
Clara and the court ladies withdrew and I was alone in the room. I was looking at the Kingâs Flower engraved on my chest in the full-length mirror.
âAs expected, itâs not just my imaginationâŠâ
I softly touched the Kingâs Flower. As always, it looked like an ordinary tattoo that hadnât hurt at all.
Whatâs bothering me is the size of that Kingâs Flower.
The Kingâs Flower given by Freed is a magical seal. Although it was flashy from the start, it wasnât so big. It was also quite easy to hide, so I wasnât worried at first.
No matter how I look at, it feels like just recently it grew one size, to best describe it.
Itâs absolutely not my imagination⊠I think.
I stared fixedly at the Kingâs Flower reflected in the mirror.
âHmm⊠After all it grew? It did, right? I wonder? But I donât feel it changed that much⊠I wonder if itâs my imaginationâ
Because Iâm usually not conscious of it, I donât remember the precise size.
If I was told itâd been like that from the start, saying Is that so? I wouldnât be curious anymore.
â⊠Well, it doesnât look like an illness, so whateverâ
My health hasnât really deteriorated. Rather, recently Iâm in a strangely great shape.
⊠Mostly when it comes to nights with Freed.
Without worrying too much, I fixed my garments and left the room.
Since Iâd obtained the permission in advance, the royal guards protecting the room didnât say anything.
The two knights who had been waiting besides the royal guards got on their knees upon recognizing me.
âBy His Highnessâs orders we have been waiting. We will provide escort until the guest roomâ
Having received my words, the knights stood up. Following their lead, I slowly walked.
Right now, same as yesterday Iâm heading to Sionâs room. Iâm much obliged to him, so I want to visit him to once again thank him, and um⊠report.
Iâd informed Freed about it in advance.
Freed readily nodded as I said I want to go give my thanks. I was happy about that too, but above all I was happy that he had believed me about my previous life.
Without making light of it all he seriously listened to my story, and moreover told me he loves me regardless of the memories of my previous life.
Knowing that, he accepted me.
Honestly, since Iâd been frightened about how heâd react, I felt immensely relieved.
The strength in his arms embracing me didnât waver. Feeling that⊠I felt like I was about to cry. I fell in love with him even more.
âThen, we will be standing by hereâ
I came back to myself at the knightsâ words.
âEh, yeah, I will be back immediately once Iâm done with my talkâ
I nodded to them standing beside the door, and knocked.
Hearing âFeel freeâ I opened the door.
Of course inside was Sion andâŠ
âAra? Whereâs Rena?â
Sion got up from the sofa and walked here to greet me. I couldnât see the beastman girl that should be near him.
When I asked about my doubt, with an Aah Sion nodded understandingly.
When I asked another question not understanding what he meant, saying Feel free Sion showed me to sit on the sofa and began talking.
âShe was my maid while we were in Tarim. Thatâs why she said she wants to take care of me, but⊠after all the common sense, and everything is different in Wilhelm and Tarim. She seems fully aware of that, and now sheâs seeking teachings from court ladiesâ
She received His Highness Friedrichâs permission , as Sion said so with a nod, I sat at the shown spot. Almost at the same time I heard knocking, and a court lady whoâs not Rena brought in tea.
Having finished serving it the court lady bowed, once she left the room I picked up the tea that exuded a ginger aroma.
The season is winter. Ginger tea that warms up the body is one of my favorite teas.
Confirming I relaxed, Sion continued with the talk.
âFor all that Rena⊠She seemed concerned she would get in court ladiesâ way. However, she said she wants to study to be more helpful to meâ
The situation is self-evident. Finding it pleasant, I broke into a smile.
âI see. Itâs lovely how she puts utmost effort to itâ
Sion agreed with my view.
âYeah. Very. As far as Iâm concerned, I think thereâs no need for that. However, Rena was a slave who had been struggling for a long time. I said many times she can be freer from now on, but she wouldnât listenâ
â⊠Surely she wants to pay back Sion for helping her, even if only a little. Sheâd be pitiful to have it deniedâ
When I said so, Sion understandingly nodded.
âYouâre right. Even if I say not to mind, she must mind it a great deal. Until she listens, I will let her do as she wants. Honestly, I want to return her to her countryâ
âI wonder if she is from the island?â
Having recalled the island where beastmen live I tried asking, and Sion affirmed.
âYeah. She said so. When she was very young, she was kidnapped and brought here. Itâs not like she isnât homesick so I think she should go back, however, she insists she couldnât do thatâ
âWhen she was young⊠I thought Rena is still smallâ
Sheâs a small child. She doesnât look 10 yet.
When I pointed that out, Sion shook his head that Iâm wrong.
âItâs what she declared, but despite appearances she seems 15. Cat beastmen are petite by nature. I heard she was kidnapped when she was fiveâ
â⊠In either case, what a cruel worldâ
With that Sion ended the subject. Sitting in front of me, he met my eyes.
âYou havenât come here today to talk about this, right. I apologize for drawing it out. Letâs get back to the talk. Princess Consort. What is your business today?â
Suddenly having that brought up, I became lost for words for just an instant.
Still, I corrected my posture and spoke to fulfil my original purpose.
âI came today to give my thanks⊠Truly, thank you for yesterday. Thanks to you, I was able to convey my feelings for His Highnessâ
At my words Sionâs eyes widened just a little, and then he let out a tiny laugh.
â⊠Is that so. Itâs wonderful if I could help youâ
âYeah, itâs thanks to you. Truly, thank youâ
âI didnât do anything so important to receive thanksâ
âNot at all. Without your words, I probably would not be able to move forwardâ
When I told him that, while still calmly smiling Sion said.
âIs that so. You are a sincere person. You do not have to worry though. Is that all you wanted to talk about?â
âYeah⊠And, this is for Rena. Itâs chocolate made by the castleâs Head Chef. As expected, I couldnât make it yesterday or todayâ
Since it felt empty to come without a gift, I sent a message to the kitchen beforehand, and received Head Chefâs deluxe chocolate. I really wanted to make it, but regrettably I didnât have time.
Next time for sure Iâll have them eat my homemade chocolate.
When I handed him the package Iâd brought, Sion nodded.
âYou didnât have to worry so much. Still, thank you very much for your consideration. I will take care of it. I will give it to Rena afterwardsâ
âPlease do. Then, with this Iâ
Because I was finished with my business, I stood up.
Sion also stood up like he understood that.
Thereâs nothing more to talk about. Such atmosphere drifted between us.
I headed for the door in silence.
I felt like itâs better to not say anything unnecessary.
When I opened the door, with âThatâs rightâ Sion called out to me like he remembered something.
Although I was deep down surprised to be called by my name and not âPrincess Consortâ, I looked back, and when I did, Sion asked quietly.
â⊠Lidi. One last thing⊠Are you happy right now?â
As I replied without any hesitation, Sion narrowed his eyes and made a dazzled face.
I wonder if itâs my imagination that there was a hint of loneliness in it.
For a while Sion said nothing, and eventually he nodded once like he understood something.
â⊠Is that so. Thatâs the most important. Then, please give His Highness Friedrich my best regardsâ
As if that was all that he wanted to ask, Sion said no more, and acknowledging that I went outside.
The moment the door closed behind me, I felt like I could hear a tiny voice.
âSo you⊠could smile like thatâ
I couldnât hear it well. And so, I once again looked back â only for the door to close with a bang.
If youâre wondering why Lidi is wearing a stole rather than a coat in the illustration, it was changed in the light novel.