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Bang-bang!
However, our witty stand-up comedy routine ended there. 1 A heavy sound echoed from afar; it felt like a huge stone statue was rushing towards us.
My assumption must have been correct–Woo Ragi held me, like I was some luggage, and ran wordlessly at a tremendous speed. I had no idea where on earth our destination was, but, at our speed, it almost felt like we were driving in a car.
I buried my face into the swordsman’s back and hugged him tightly around the shoulder. While running, he flinched, as if he found me annoying, but he seemed to let my actions slide.
Spring–!
Then, he jumped so high–I had no idea how many meters above ground we were. Whenever Woo Ragi stepped (on the ground?), he made a creaking sound as if he were running across a shabby wooden floor. The planks could barely supporting the weight of two people.
After leaping a few times like that, the swordsman leaned over, as if he grabbed onto some handhold and were peering off a ledge. His body was completely tilted, and I was worried he’d fall. I hurried to cling to his body again; instead of making more abusive remarks, Woo Ragi quietly observed something below.
He waited for a long while, jumped, and escaped from the monster through this vertical route. Afterwards, the swordsman took me inside one of the rooms within this mansion–I could only assume this was a room thanks to the barely noticeable sound of a door closing, his soft footsteps on the carpet, and the touch of the soft bed on which Woo Ragi set me down.
I hesitated before placing my legs completely atop the bed; he sat down next to me and created a depression in the mattress. “I saw it while jumping around.”
“Huh? Yeah…”
“The monster had a key in its mouth.”
“What?” I blinked meaninglessly at his words and then stared at–around–the swordsman with a questioning look. “Then…”
“It’s probably an escape hint.”
After contemplating, I asked, “It’s probably… impossible to carry me and fight that monster, right?”
“Yeah,” Woo Ragi replied succinctly. I also had no desire to latch onto him like some bulletproof vest while he fought.
However, if I separated from Woo Ragi’s side, I wouldn’t be able to defend myself at all. Woo Ragi also seemed to be concerned about my eyes’ condition as well. In this brief, quiet lull, the swordsman tried to tinker with something around my eyes; judging from the sweeping wind across my eyes, he must be fanning with his hands.
“[Light].” Still tranquil, Woo Ragi took out an illuminating item from his inventory. He seemed to check something several times before quietly saying, “It’s like your nerves are completely blocked. Your pupils aren’t reacting to light at all.”
Just as he said, my vision was completely dark though the [Light] skill was used. I nodded meekly, “…Yeah…”
“I don’t see any external trauma.”
“Really?”
That was fortunate–I was worried about what kind of injury my eyes had suffered.
“Wait,” he said.
“Huh? Hmmm…”
Woo Ragi slowly groped the region around my eye sockets. He was probably looking for fracture lines or other seemingly invisible injuries.
With an anxious heart, I waited until the swordsman pulled his hands away.
Soon afterwards, he quickly took his hands back. “As I thought, you’re probably under a curse?”
“What?”
“There’s no signs of trauma or other external factors, and yet you’ve suddenly become blind. This can’t be caused by anything else but a curse.” The way he apathetically commented as if he were passively observing someone else’s dilemma made his tone sound so mean.
As I thought over his words, I suddenly asked, “Don’t you usually get cursed…when you touch something weird? I haven’t done anything, though…”
“You’ll get cursed if you foolishly crawl around in a strange house.” Though I asked quite sincerely, his reply was dry and absentminded.
“That’s…! Then why didn’t you get cursed!? We got sucked here together…”
“Your curse is clearly disadvantaging me as well?”
“That’s not what I mean! I’m just saying it’s weird… Why am I the only one affected?… You seem perfectly fine.”
“If we’re really dividing us into different categories… Haven’t you cursed me in some sense?”
I had briefly forgotten that Woo Ragi was dead, so my shoulders inadvertently trembled. I made an unintentional gaffe.
However, Woo Ragi didn’t seem to care much about that and didn’t say anything in particular. Then, all of a sudden, the mattress rocked once more; I realized the swordsman had laid down on the bed.
“Are you perhaps…going to fall asleep?” I asked.
“No? This pig was hanging on my neck all day–I’m stretching.”
“……”
Did he really have to show off his ability to anger others every single time he opened his mouth?
I glared towards the origin of his voice, but the thought of staring blindly wasn’t exactly desirable. So, I simply closed my eyes and laid on the bed as well. To be honest, it was exhausting to cling to Woo Ragi. I thought about lying down and organizing my thoughts rather than awkwardly half-sitting, half-squatting…
Of course, I expected Woo Ragi to throw another tantrum if I were to follow his actions and lie down… But, my stamina was at its limits now. Still, I placed my head at the edge of the mattress, careful not to brush against the swordsman as much as possible. As soon as I changed my posture, sure enough, I heard a sarcastic voice.
“Haah, he’s following me and laying down now.” As expected, Woo Ragi bullied me.
I ignored his comments and fumbled with my hands to find a dusty pillow. Then, laying my head down, I shot back, “If you don’t shut up, I’m going to cling to you.”
“……” Perhaps he really loathed that consequence, Woo Ragi went silent afterwards.
While a quiet, forlorn atmosphere settled around us, I pondered how we’d escape from this place. The swordsman told me a giant statue monster held a key in his mouth…
‘And, considering how Woo Ragi ran away from it by continuously jumping up… I guess that statue isn’t a flying monster–unlike the gargoyles…’
""
Then, was it just extraordinarily big? After contemplating about this and that, I called out to the swordsman, asking for his input, “Hey…”
“……”
“You’re listening, right?”
In lieu of answering, Woo Ragi shifted on the mattress. For some reason, it sounded like he turned his back towards me. However, his ears should still work fine, so I continued to talk to myself. “That monster can’t fly, right? It’s just huge, right?”
“That’s right.” The swordsman’s voice echoed, as if he were talking to the wall.
I continued, “Just how large is it?”
“It’s about 10 meters tall and has a key gripped in its mouth. It looks a little like a twin-headed Ogre… well, rather than two-headed, it looks like it has two faces.”
“What?”
“One face is weeping; the other face, on the back of its head, has a gigantic grin. The smiling mouth is the one holding the key… Because of that, this monster doesn’t have a blind spot.”
I got goosebumps when I imagined the monster from Woo Ragi’s descriptions. Just what kind of monster would look like that?
Appalled, I said, “It has only one body?”
“It looks like two chests were plastered onto its torso–four arms and two legs. But, that’s what the one who has the key looks like… The statue across the room has the head of a cat.”
""
“There’s two stone statues?”
“Didn’t I say that from the beginning?” The swordsman’s voice was laden with contempt.
I did remember him saying that there was a stone statue holding an iron mace. “Ah, then the one holding the mace…”
“Yeah, the cat.”
“Then…the statue with the four arms and the key in its mouth…”
“It did have a sheathed sword around its waist; it didn’t unsheathe it when I took you and jumped away. But, I can’t say that it’ll react the same when we go after the key…”
“…….”
“Normally, monsters with weapons will use them.”
I sighed gloomily. Even if I were fine and capable, I wondered if Woo Ragi could deal with those two monsters after leaving me somewhere. First, his opponents were just too large–10 meters tall…
“Then, did you see any monsters besides those two?” I asked.
“None for now at least.” With that said, Woo Ragi added, “There were a few broken stone fragments around those two.”
“……”
“It’s like a fiery tournament had broken out.”
Of course, his remarks weren’t helpful for my state of mind.
Footnotes
만담 (mandam) is actually more akin to Rakugo–a comedic storytelling medium that often involves telling a long, complicated story in a comedic way. Stand-up comedy routine is probably more familiar to english audiences; both share parodying political or social commentary.