âThereâs one thing I canât understand even if we take everything you said as truthâŠâ He lowered his voice and whispered into my ear.
âWhat?â
âThat means that everything about me is faked. You said I didnât exist during your highschool days.â
âThatâsâŠright?â
âThen, normally in cases like this, wonât you be able to return to your original world after you kill me? Itâs like that in the movies.â
ââŠWhat did you say?â Surprised, I looked at Seo Dawon. He calmly met my gaze; he didnât even chuckle at my wide open eyes.
You donât believe me at all, but youâd calmly discuss the possibility of your death being the key to end this memoryâŠ? Flustered and scared, I stopped walking and scrutinized Seo Dawon. âAre you asking me to kill you?â
âYou said this is all a dream anyway. Iâm speaking from your perspective.â
âYou donât believe me though.â
âIn any case, you just want to âwake up,â right?â
How could he say such things so placidly? Simultaneously, though, I began to problematically think that Seo Dawonâs words were somewhat valid. After all, this place definitely isnât reality.
ButâŠ
ââŠEnough. Itâs still⊠We donât even know if killing you will wake me from this memory anyway.â The more I looked at Seo Dawon, the more I thought I couldnât harm him willingly. I superimposed the future Seo Dawon onto him.
Furthermore, Seo Dawonâjudging from his teasing smileâmust have gleaned something from my soft and vague answer.
Seeing that face, I impulsively asked, âIf you were in my situationâŠWould you kill me?â
âNope.â Seo Dawon answered before I could even finish my question. And, casually, he continued, âI would simply try jumping from the roof. Usually, they say the sensation of falling helps to wake you up.â
ââŠâŠâ
I showed him an expression that conveyed how tired I was of him. Seo Dawon stared at me as if he was looking through my facade and smiled quietly when I didnât resume walking. Then, he murmured, as if he intended for me to hear him, âWhat a relief. I would have taken you immediately to the hospital if you suddenly insisted on jumping.â
ââŠHaah.â
Either wayâkilling Seo Dawon or jumping to my death to wake from this memoryâwould require me to muster up some courage. If I had to choose one from those two choicesâŠI guess I would jump.
Honestly, since I knew I was within a [Vengeful Ghost Memory], I wasnât scared of death, but I would have to brace myself for a world of pain⊠It wasnât easy to parrot empty words about preparing myself for the pain of a shattered body. However, Seo Dawon didnât seem to realize that I hesitated due to the promise of pain rather than being afraid of death.
Of course, Seo Dawon would not have mentioned this method because he truly wanted me to jump off a high place. From his point of view, he was seeing someone he thought normal loudly proclaiming that this world was all faked. He must be trying to observe my reactions while pretending to agree with meâŠ
So, I shook my head and walked ahead instead of arguing the point further. I didnât want to reveal my complicated feelings evident in my expression. Seo Dawon tranquilly followed behind.
* * *
âLee-kyung-ah. Letâs go eat something.â
Not long afterwards, Seo Dawon suddenly dragged me away, claiming he was hungry. I contemplated what to do, but I noddedâit would be best to stay by his side anyway.
After a short while, we arrived at another familiar place: a snack/fast food place near school. 1 As soon as I entered, I ordered the knife-cut noodles 2 I had once liked; I felt strange since, fascinatingly, the noodles tasted exactly the same. I remember being so disappointed that this shop had transformed into a cell phone vendor before I graduated from high school.
âThen, would I be 18 years old now?â
When I thought that, I looked down at my hand. I realized belatedly that I couldnât see the scar I had obtained during my military draft.
Seeing bare skin reminded me of a novel I had read back when I had deeply regretted choosing the Necromancer class. In the novel, the protagonist experienced a regression after death; the main character was so delighted to see his younger body, saying that a new opportunity had arrived.
âIf only I could also turn back time like what Iâm readingâŠâ I had thought.
Now that Iâm in a similar situation, though, I feel rather at a loss. The only good thatâs come of this experience is that Iâm able to vividly see Seo Dawonâs younger faceâŠ
âI have such carefree thoughts now.â
I kept glancing at Seo Dawon in front of me, conscious of his presence. Of course, as soon as I realized those subconscious actions, I was a bit embarrassed. Should I say that I kept comparing the boy in front of me to the man I knew? The present Seo Dawon rarely ate in front of me, so it was somewhat strange and fascinating to watch him eat.
âWhat are you staring at?â
ââŠâŠâ
With how blatantly I stared at him, thereâs no way Seo Dawon didnât know the answer to his own question.
Why on earth was he pretending otherwise⊠While I stood, flustered, Seo Dawon gave smiles at the passing high school studentsâas if he was already familiar with the faces Iâd make and had no need to look at me.
âDo you want to come over today?â Seo Dawon asked.
âWhere?â
âMy house.â
Because there seemed to be some insidious nuance laden in the words, âmy house,â I shook my head fiercely. Iâd feel a lot of shame if I was swept away by his flow and did something with him. In the end, this place was all fakedâhow should I face the Seo Dawon back in reality?
However, Seo Dawon did not back down easily. âYou have nothing to do, though.â
âI have a lot? Youâre the one who has nothing to do.â
âYouâre playing hard to get⊠Then, should we go to your house?â
âYou want to be with me that much?â
âIsnât that obvious?â He acted as if he had no shame.
His unexpected words landed a clean blow on me; my face flushed with warmth. The Seo Dawon who openly declared his affections for me without hiding anything made me strangely bashful. Even though I knew that this was simply a fabricated memoryâhe was not like this in realityâbutâŠ
However, before I responded, I blinked while looking at Seo Dawon; I saw something off on the inside of his hand during our conversation. âW-Wait a minuteâŠStretch out your hand.â
âWhy?â
âShow me your palms.â
Seo Dawon paused momentarily, but soon unfurled his hands. And, on his palm, were ten cross-shaped scarsâsimilar to the cuts I made on my own palm with the dagger.
âHow comeâŠâ
âWhatâs wrong with you?â
âWhere did you get this scar?â
âWhat do you mean, âscarâ?â
However, it seemed as if Seo Dawon was ignorant of the scars engraved onto his palm.
âItâs right there!â Frustrated, I even groped at the healed wounds with my fingertips.
The other simply closed his mouth, opening and closing his fist a couple of times. âIâve never hurt my hands though?â
I could see that Seo Dawon wasnât joking with me through his sincere expression. It really seemed like only I could see this scar. Furthermore, suspiciously, the scar looked similar to the wounds I inflicted upon my own hands.
Why would the wounds incurred during the [Vengeful Ghost Summoning] appear on Seo Dawonâs palm?
âNo way, Seo Dawon must beâŠâ
But, before I could think deeper on the issue, I suddenly heard an alarm from both my and Seo Dawonâs cell phone. Simultaneously, the small TV screen in the snack shop cut its broadcast with a [No Signal] display.
âOh my, whatâs going on?â
âWhatâs with this?â
âHey, I just received a disaster PSA.â
Suddenly, the store owner and the customers alike began to chatter.
Weeeee-wooooâ
Then, I began to hear a faint siren sound from outside the store. I had heard this kind of racket often during military defense training, but, unlike training, the siren continued without end. An ominous feeling washed over me.
ââŠâŠL-Look at that!â
All the anxious customers rose from their seats. Seo Dawon and I also froze, staring out the store window.
One man pointed at something outside. This eatery was located at the corner of a large intersection; the front and sides were built with transparent glass, so anyone could see far out with no hindrances.
Therefore, when my gaze followed the manâs pointed finger, I could clearly see to the far along the road. At the end, thick, black smoke rose into the air.
âIs that a fire?â
However, as soon as he saw the smoke rising, Seo Dawon mumbled to himself. âWhy arenât there any cars driving along the road?â
Come to think of it, I couldnât see a single car in the intersection.
TL: I feel like Iâm getting whiplash from âOmg itâs so sweetâ to âWhat on earth is going on?????â
Also, Today is finally the last day of my finals! Iâll be able to start TLâing again after giving myself a break/relaxation time. Iâll probably be back to full capacity after Christmas!
Footnotes
ë¶ìì§ is translated as a snack shop, but they sell things like spicy rice cakes, ramen, kimbap, fried food etc. Itâs more weighty than western snacks, but not âweightyâ enough to be considered a restaurant meal. INSERT PICTURE OF KALGUKSU