Chapter 5

From the Same Desk

Actually, I don’t really need mechanical arms. I still like my original arms.

Because he had walked around in the snow barefoot several days ago, Gu Mingxi’s feet were frostbitten. This made him very distressed.

Of the four seasons, the one he hated most was winter. In the winter, he had to wear very thick clothes, which made using his feet to do things more difficult. When he put on and took off his clothes, he couldn’t do it all on his own either. And the other reason is that when the temperature decreases, walking around barefoot was really cold.

Despite Li Han making socks for Gu Mingxi that revealed his toes, he didn’t wear them often. Most of the time, he just used his bare feet to do things. Was.h.i.+ng his fact, brus.h.i.+ng his teeth, eating, writing… It had been five and a half years already, with two painful years of practicing at the start. The him now was already used to this way of life.

His frostbitten toes were red and itchy, but Gu Mingxi didn’t dare to scratch them. When he was even younger, he’d gotten frostbite before. At the time, he didn’t understand things, so he would constantly rub his feet together. The itching stopped, but his skin was also rubbed off, to the point that his feet would bleed. It was a long time before he fully recovered.

During labor(?) cla.s.s, Gu Mingxi held a pair of scissors with his right foot. Enduring the itching, he carefully cut out a sheet of rigid paper. The teacher had already given out the task. Because New Year’s Day was approaching, each pair of deskmates would make a greet card for the new year.

Without a doubt, this cla.s.s was the cla.s.s Gu Mingxi hated the most. It wasn’t easy for him to use scissors and other tools as well. And especially when there were group projects, even when he wanted to partic.i.p.ate, the rest of the group wouldn’t look very welcoming.

Regarding these things, Gu Mingxi never forced anything, and especially wouldn’t quarrel with others. The 11 year old him already understood a truth of the world. There would be some people that would never be willing to accept him. They would think he was very dirty, very strange, and they would be very afraid. He couldn’t do anything to change those things.

Pang Qian had been secretly watching Gu Mingxi the whole time, and kept feeling that something wasn’t quite right. His desk was lower, so when she looked over, she couldn’t not see his feet cutting the paper. She realized that the paper’s edges were cut ragged and uglily. And he was very slow.

“Gu Mingxi, do you want me to help you?” she asked quietly. Then she added, “You’ve cut it so ugly. I don’t want a card that ugly.”

Hearing the first half of what she said, Gu Mingxi was rather happy. Hearing the second half made him unhappy. “If you don’t want it, don’t take it.”

“Hm.” Pang Qian said, “Then I won’t give you the card I make either.”

“Whatever.” Gu Mingxi kept his head down. “I don’t care.”

She retorted, “I don’t care either!”

The two of them stubbornly turned their heads away. Ten minutes later, Pang Qian couldn’t stand it any longer. She tugged on Gu Mingxi’s sleeve, “Gu Mingxi, help me draw on my card. My drawings are ugly.”

Gu Mingxi lifted his head and looked at her, a faint smile on his lips. But still, he said sullenly, “It’s not for me anyway. I don’t care if it’s ugly or not.”

Pang Qian thought for a moment, thinking what happened. But she was an honest girl, so quickly said, “Then… I’ll give it to you. You draw really nicely, help me draw something.”

Gu Mingxi finally smiled, saying, “If you’re giving it to me, that’s more reason for you to draw. Would I care about a drawing that I made myself?”

Pang Qian scratched her head, confused. “Aren’t you afraid my drawing will be ugly?”

Gu Mingxi shook his head, smiled and said, “Not afraid.”

The cla.s.s finally came to an end, and Gu Mingxi and Pang Qian exchanged cards. At this moment, Jian Zhe came up to his side and asked, “Gu Mingxi, going to the bathroom?”

Gu Mingxi nodded, put on his shoes, got up, and said, “Yeah.”

In school, because of his unusual body, there were indeed many students who didn’t dare to interact with him. But he still had a few good friends.

Jian Zhe and Liu Hanlin were Gu Mingxi’s good friend. Neither of them were kids from the Golden Compound. When he started first grade, because he didn’t have arms, there were a lot of things that Gu Mingxi couldn’t do on his own. For example, the problem of using the restroom. During a parent-teacher meeting, Teacher Li made sure to ask a few boys’ parents if they would be willing to let their kids help Gu Mingxi.

Some parents directly said no, saying it was dirty or troublesome. Some were worried that it would affect their kids’ own studies. But Jian Zhe and Liu Hanlin’s parents both agreed. Two young fathers urged their sons to watch out for and help Gu Mingxi. He wasn’t very different from everyone else after all.

From then on, Jian Zhe and Liu Hanlin took on the responsibility of helping Gu Mingxi with the toilet. The two of them split up the work, alternating the weeks that they helped. Gu Mingxi couldn’t pull his pants up and down on his own, and would rely on the two boys to help him. After some time, the three of them naturally became good friends.

Of course, Gu Mingxi didn’t defecate at school. When there were times he couldn’t hold it, he would go to ask a male teacher to help him.

To have one of his cla.s.smates help wipe his b.u.t.t… He wasn’t brave enough for that.

All things said and done, Gu Mingxi was a pretty easygoing boy. He didn’t mind many things, but that didn’t mean that his heart was so big and without bounds.

When this part of his life started, he was also very scared and anxious. After all, for someone who had lost both his arms, the world he would be living in was completely different to other people’s.

Li Han had lied to him before. Gu Mingxi had just woken up from his operation, and he realized his shoulders were wrapped up in gauze. And his arms were missing. His shoulders hurt a lot. He was very panicked. He couldn’t stop himself from crying and asking Li Han where his arms had gone to.

Li Han just told a lie that all mothers under the sky would tell. “Your arms were broken, so the doctor is going to fix them. When he’s done fixing them, he will give them back to you.”

Gu Mingxi, laying in the hospital bed, was very suspicious. He asked feebly, “Will it be fixed to how they were originally?”

“Of course.”

“Then when they’re fixed, can they be put back on?”

“Yes.” Li Han touched his head lovingly, holding back her tears, nodding as she answered.

Gu Mingxi still wasn’t convinced, and asked, “What if they can’t be put back on?”

Li Han said, “That won’t happen. The doctor is very amazing. As long as you’re good and listen, and eat your medicine on time, your little arms will come back soon.”

Gu Mingxi smiled, nodding. “Mm, I’ll be good and listen.”

He believed his mother’s words. From then on, he looked forward to it, each and every day. Lying on the hospital bed, he would ask patiently.

“Mommy, why haven’t my arms been fixed yet?”

“Mommy, could they have forgotten to fix my arms?”

“Mommy, help me ask the doctor, okay? Ask him when he can return my arms to me.”

“Mommy, did they mess up my arms? If there’s a little something wrong, that’s okay. Just let them put them back on for me, okay? I miss my arms!”

Even when the doctors and nurses came to change his dressings or give him a checkup, he would endure the pain. Laughing, he would ask, “Miss Doctor, hurry and fix up my arms, okay? I still have to go to school.”

Until one day, he asked Li Han quietly, “Mommy, what’s today’s date?”

“What’s the matter?” Li Han knew that 6 year old Gu Mingxi didn’t have much of a concept regarding dates and times. She didn’t understand why he would ask about it. Gu Mingxi said in a quiet voice, “I can go to school on September 1st. Mommy, is it September 1st yet?”

It was already mid September by then, but Li Han lied to him. “Not yet, Mingxi.”

Later, Gu Mingxi seemed to understand a little. He grew more and more silent, not at all like the expectant boy at the start. He asked Li Han, “Mom, are my arms never going to be fixed?”

Seeing him ask like this, Li Han couldn’t hold it back any longer. Her tears started falling. Trying to sound as calm as possible, she said, “Mingxi, the doctor just told me that your arms were broken so much that they can’t be fixed.”

“How can they not keep their word?” Gu Mingxi cried, and foolishly asked, “So now what? I don’t have arms anymore?”

Li Han nodded, not forgetting to comfort him. “No, the doctor said that in the future, they can make you mechanical arms. They’ll… They’ll be just like your original arms.”

“Mechanical arms?” Gu Mingxi’s eyes grew wide, pleasantly surprised. “You mean like the Transformers?”

At that time, the Transformers cartoon had taken the country by storm. There wasn’t a boy anywhere that didn’t like it. Li Han’s words had reignited the expectations in Gu Mingxi’s heart. His immature self had thought that having two mechanical arms like the Transformers would be a pretty cool thing.

Even when Jin Ai’hua brought Pang Qian to the hospital to visit, Gu Mingxi proudly proclaimed that in the future, he would have two mechanical arms that could do anything. They could shoot bullets and they could change shape.

Little Pang Qian looked at him with a face filled with envy. She reached out her fat little hand to touch the gauze on his shoulders, asking, “They’ll put it on here?”

“Mm!”

“Will it hurt when they put it on?”

“Oh… Probably a little bit.” Gu Mingxi thought seriously, and said, “But I’m not afraid!”

Pang Qian said, “Then… Then later, can you let me play with your mechanical arms?”

“Okay, but you have to remember to return them,” Gu Mingxi said happily. But then he was a bit discouraged. “Those doctors don’t keep their word. They originally said that they would fix my arms, but in the end, they didn’t fix them. Actually, I don’t really need mechanical arms. I still like my original arms.”

—

When Pang Qian and Gu Mingxi were going home that day, Gu Mingxi told her that he’d be going to Shanghai over winter break.

“Shanghai? What for?” Pang Qian asked.

“I don’t know either. My dad told me,” Gu Mingxi answered as he kicked the pebbles on the ground.

The snow had already melted. As they walked back on the familiar little road, Pang Qian smelled the scent of roasted sweet potatoes. I couldn’t stop myself from reaching into my pocket for change.

“Do you eat sweet potatoes?” she asked.

Gu Mingxi shook his head.

“Then I’ll buy a small one.” Pang Qian walked over to the grandpa selling sweet potatoes and pulled out 50 cents from her pocket. She said, “Grandpa, give me a 50 cent sweet potato.”

The grandpa looked at her, and then reached into the sweet potato oven. He picked one out, looked at it, then put it back. He picked another out, looked at it, and put it back inside again. Finally, he said to Pang Qian, “Little girl, I don’t have a sweet potato that small. Why don’t you buy one worth 1 dollar and share it with your friend?”

Pang Qian blushed. She only had 50 cents.

“Then I won’t buy.” She stuffed her money back into her pocket, and turned around to leave. Gu Mingxi shouted for her to stop.

“Pang Pang, I have money in my pocket. Take it out yourself and buy one worth 1 dollar.”

Pang Qian was unhappy. “I don’t eat handouts!”

Gu Mingxi said, “I’ll split it with you.”

Hearing this, Pang Qian had become cheerful. She familiarly reached into his pocket and pulled out the money.

After they bought their food, they continued home. Pang Qian was eating the tasty sweet potato, and thought of the question from before. She asked, “Is your dad taking you to Shanghai to visit relatives?”

“I don’t think so. We don’t have any relatives in Shanghai.”

“Then are you going for vacation?”

“I don’t know, maybe.”

“My dad’s been to Shanghai before.” Pang Qian’s face was stuffed, so her words were a bit unclear, “He said Shanghai has trains (subway/metro). Some of the steel they use is from their factory.”

“My dad also mentioned it before.” Gu Mingxi asked, “Have you ridden on the train before?”

“No,” Pang Qian shook her head. “You?”

Gu Mingxi also shook his head. “Me neither. I can ride it when I go to Shanghai this time though.”

“When you come back, tell me if it’s fun or not.”

“Okay.”

“Hey, do you want some sweet potato?” She suddenly thought of the delicious food in her hands. “You said we would share it. If you don’t eat it now, I’ll finish it all.”

Gu Mingxi looked at her hands and the sweet potato that was nearly gone. He rejected, “I won’t eat it.”

Pang Qian stared at him, “Why not!”

“I’m not hungry.” Gu Mingxi turned and quickly walked off. Pang Qian wasn’t letting it go though. She caught up to him and stuffed the sweet potato at his mouth. “Eat a bite. It’s sweet and delicious!”

Gu Mingxi went left and right, but still couldn’t avoid it. Without another choice, he could only take a bite of the sweet potato. “Okay! I’ve had some!”

“Is it sweet?”

Helplessly, he said, “Yes.”

Pang Qian laughed. It was at this time that a woman from the Golden Compound cycled past. Seeing these two kids playing happily in the road, she laughed, and called out, “Hey, Mingxi! Don’t play on the street, it’s dangerous. Hurry and take your wife home.”

“…I’ll be sure to watch out, Auntie Zhong.” Gu Mingxi was a bit quiet, but still responded out of courtesy.

After the woman named Zhong pa.s.sed by, Pang Quan pursed her lips. Angrily, she said, “Why did you talk to her? My mom hates her, because she’s always talking nonsense in the compound.”

Gu Mingxi looked at her, without a sound.

This woman was indeed a bit of a gossip. For example, she was the only person in the whole Golden Compound who still called Pang Qian as Gu Mingxi’s “wife.”

Even after Jin Ai’hua argued with her in front of the whole cafeteria at work, she still didn’t change her ways.

At that time, Zhong Xiaolian said with irony to Jin Ai’hua, “When Gu Mingxi was still jumping around, your family was clinging to theirs. You helped give rides, helped take care of him, you even treated him like your own son. Now that Gu Mingxi is disabled, you’re just throwing him away like that! So what if I say ‘wife’? Oh! Gu Mingxi isn’t good enough for your Fattie now?! Don’t you forget, your Fattie has some responsibility in Gu Mingxi losing his arms!”

Hearing these words, Jin Ai’hua pushed up her sleeves, as if getting ready for a brawl. In the end, she was stopped by Pang Shuisheng, who’d been pulled over by the commotion. Pang Shuisheng made a vow in front of all those colleagues, “If any member of our Pang family were to look down on Gu Mingxi because he has no arms, then they will be struck by lightening! Gu Guoxiang is my brother, who wore the same open-crotch pants (good friends since young)! Right now, he’s out of the country, so I, Pang Shuisheng, will take care of Gu Mingxi in his place! Gu Mingxi is my son! But Mingxi and Qian Qian are still young. Don’t talk any more about these (arranged) child marriages. In the future, when they grow up, if those two kids really fall in love, I, Pang Shuisheng, make this promise today! I will not oppose it!”

“Pang Shuisheng, what are you saying!” Jin Ai’hua pulled him away angrily.  Pang Shuisheng turned, “Not afraid to bring shame? Shut up!”

Of course, Gu Mingxi and Pang Qian didn’t know about this matter. But ever since then, Jin Ai’hua has hated Zhong Xiaolian. She would often say bad things about Zhong Xiaolian to Pang Qian, telling her daughter to treat that woman’s words as nonsense.

With regards to the problem of Gu Mingxi, it was without a doubt, that Pang Shuisheng and Jin Ai’hua had very different opinions. After Gu Mingxi spent a year recuperating at home, he entered primary school with Pang Qian. At that time, Gu Guoxiang still hadn’t returned home yet. Pang Shuisheng expended a lot of effort for the two kids. He asked a carpenter to make a customized desk for Gu Mingxi. He even pleaded with the teacher to let his daughter be deskmates with Gu Mingxi.

Gu Mingxi and Pang Qian were both still small then, so naturally, they wouldn’t go against their parents. So they became deskmates just like that, and then it was 5 years later.

That evening, as the three members of the Pang family started eating, Jin Ai’hua suddenly asked Pang Qian, “Did you run into Zhong Xiaolian today?”

Pang Qian nodded, then said immediately, “I didn’t talk to her.”

“If you meet her in the future, just leave. Make sure not to pay her any attention.” Jin Ai’hua added some food to Pang Qian’s bowl. “That crazy woman came back and ran into me, and even specially talked about how she saw you and Gu Mingxi playing happily in the street. You were feeding him sweet potato, and it seemed like you were getting along well. What kind of garbage is she spewing?”

Pang Qian continued eating silently, “…”

Pang Shuisheng was a bit angry, “Ai’hua!”

“What!” Jin Ai’hua turned to look at Pang Qian, asking, “Let me ask you. Did you feed Gu Mingxi sweet potato?”

“No,” Pang Qian immediately shook her head. “I was eating it myself.”

Jin Ai’hua looked at her for a moment, then said, “You’re getting older, so you should understand things. Gu Mingxi is a boy. Although you two are deskmates, you two can’t get too close. Understand?”

“Mm.” Pang Qin was like small chick pecking at grains.

“Fortunately, when you graduate primary school, you two won’t go to the same school anymore.” Thinking about this matter, Jin Ai’hua became happy.

Pang Qian was caught by surprise, her head snapping up. “Why?”

Pang Shuisheng stopped Jin Ai’hua. “It’s still uncertain, don’t talk so much.”

“Dad…” She didn’t know why, but upon hearing that she and Gu Mingxi wouldn’t be attending the same junior high, Pang Qian felt a bit scared, and had a deep feeling of dismay. Pang Shuisheng didn’t let her continue asking, and said, “Eat. It’s still more than a year away, what’s the rush.”

The next day, Pang Qian naturally told Gu Mingxi about her doubts. But Gu Mingxi just said, “I don’t know. My parents haven’t told me anything.”

“It can’t be that you’re changing schools to Shanghai!” Pang Qian said anxiously, ” Go home and ask your parents!”

Seeing her so on edge, Gu Mingxi actually really wanted to smile. He asked, “What’s wrong? Haven’t you always complained that you don’t want to share a desk with me? If we’re at different schools, then won’t you be free?”

Shocked, Pang Qian blinked her eyes a few times. Then she said, “That’s right… Then I won’t have to go to school back with you. I won’t have to get your meal boxes. I won’t have to help you do things. Won’t have to help you put on your raincoat. Won’t have to help you tie your shoelaces and put on your scarf.”

“Mm.” Gu Mingxi looked at her, his lips forming a smile. “Isn’t this good then? You always complain that I make things troublesome for you.”

“Good, good…” Pang Qian kept blinking. Then suddenly, she viciously spat out, “Good, my b.u.t.t!”

Gu Mingxi frowned and his lips twitched. “Hey, Pang Pang, if you talk like that, it’s really quite like your mom…”