CH 46

Now I have no choice but to admit that I was left alone in the forest. Rather than being afraid of being isolated in an unknown place, I was in a state of rage at the fact that it happened as the person I had always hated had said.

At first, I denied the fact that I was lost, then I realized anew that I didn’t even know the way back because I was lost, and then everything just became annoying.

I don’t know anything else, but I feel a little sorry for the people who are probably looking for me by now.

“…”

I thought I’d like to search the woods alone the moment I heard that Dante might be here, but I swear I didn’t want this situation.

I didn’t know it would turn out to be like this. It means that even though I tried to come to my senses, somehow I ended up being left alone.

A small resentment rose from the bottom of my chest, but I couldn’t hold on to anyone to express it. I’m not going to lie, really, I didn’t feel the slightest hint of human presence.

After looking around in vain, I decided to review the situation and sat down on a tree stump. Obviously, I was with the group until a few minutes ago, but how the hell did I end up alone?

Ah, if I include other non-human beings, am I not alone…?

I looked at the monsters shimmering in a blurry form in front of me and quietly rested my head.

***

Just an hour before leaving with the party.

The spirit summoned by Kade only informed us that the place was the forest, yet couldn’t pinpoint the exact location, so after entering the forest, we decided to move in two groups.

In fact, I think it was a reasonable choice considering Dante or the ability we have in the yard to find traces of him…

“Don’t stick to the side, follow me from behind. You’re getting in the way.”

If we don’t fight while walking around, I will be around someone I’m glad with. I thought of Lily, who was looking at the two of us together like that until we were torn in different directions, and somehow felt a bit tired.

I can’t say it out loud as long as this guy is listening but, Lily. The one who causes all of this isn’t me, it’s this guy.

“Phew, I should have gone with Ivan.”

“I can hear you complaining.”

“It’s a voice purposely spat out to be heard.”

As usual, Kade listened and frowned at me. Now, both I and that guy were accustomed to exchanging words that were quarrelsome rather than irritating.

Ah, there’s nothing good about getting used to it. Originally, hatred was the scariest thing in life.

“Shall we just go without talking?”

When you have this subtle hunch, you can block the whole conversation. I said lightly, thinking that he would accept it anyway as he showed with his whole body that he didn’t like going with me anyway.

In fact, even if he accepted it, I wondered how long this agreement would last as long as we were together. I’m sure we’ll start talking sooner or later, whether he’s suddenly complaining or I have something to ask him.

However, Kade’s reaction to my half-joking, half-serious words was this.

“Why. Are you in a bad mood at last?”

“…?”

What kind of nonsense is this all of a sudden? I looked at the back of Kade’s head from afar and spat out.

“I have never been in a good mood.”

“Because you show none of anything like that on your face.”

What, is this guy openly admitting that he has been looking at my feelings all this time? Shortly after being caught by his bizarre question, Kade continued his remarks in a sarcastic tone.

“I thought you were a human whose emotions were underdeveloped as you didn’t know how to do anything.”

Wow, it’s been a long time since I’ve been criticized like this. I looked back for a moment to see what I had said wrong, concluded that I hadn’t done anything wrong, and stopped at the spot.

Perhaps realizing that the sound of footsteps behind him had stopped, Kade followed me and stopped.

As he turned his head, his hair, which seemed even more white as it was in the dark, swayed. It seemed that I somehow knew what the eyes beyond the monocle contained, yet it seemed that I didn’t.

Maybe he was just in a bad mood, or he was looking thoroughly as I’m not responding like I usually do.

And maybe, like someone checking to see if I was really offended, with a bit of caution, he…

As soon as our eyes met, the emotion that had been gleaming through Kade’s eyes quickly disappeared.

He said in a tone as if he was annoyed that I didn’t move from the spot as I pretended to ponder.

“Why are you standing like that?”

“I’m thinking about how to live in the world so that I can be crooked like you.”

There was a very short gap before he answered again. He seemed to be thinking deeply about what he was hearing, as he did every time I threw out a word.

I knew that such an attitude only comes from someone who has never heard a rude remark in their life.

And again, he asked me in a trembling tone, like an angry man.

“Just now… What did you say?”

“I’m not being sarcastic, I’m serious. Hmm, looking at you, now I get why Ivan said you’re sensitive.”

Seeing the annoyance in his silver eyes for a moment, I thought he was going to nag at Ivan for making fun of him, but I let it go because it wasn’t my business. I’m sorry, Ivan. Cheer up.

“I expected it from the time you treated me as a lump of baggage, but do you feel that an ordinary person is an axis of evil to you?”

When I first heard that, I thought, yeah, Dante seemed to be that dangerous. Since they’re going to deal with such a dangerous person, he might have been annoyed and irritated because I don’t have any special abilities. I couldn’t have the same mindset, but at least I guessed what that guy was thinking.

However, when I heard that I’m incompetent, I don’t know how to do anything, and I’m useless, he just ended up looking like someone who hated incompetent people regardless of the situation. Not because this is an unordinary situation.

“Why are you saying such nonsense all of a sudden?”

“You seem used to criticizing people who are a little less than you.”

“…”

When Kade heard that, he shut his mouth. Seeing the deepening of the wrinkles between his eyes, it seemed that he was looking back to see whether he really did that.

I guess I have some ideas. He couldn’t speak well, yet he seemed to have a conscience.

“It’s certainly true that I’m being unilaterally carried on by you. That’s what I’m a little sorry about.”

But.

“But that doesn’t mean you can treat me carelessly, does it?”

“…”

Again, Kade had no answer. I shrugged my shoulders, thinking that he was doing that not because he was ignoring what I was saying.

“Actually, I don’t want to say anything because I think you were born with the way you speak, but at least from next time on, I hope you don’t divide people into those who are helpful to you and those who aren’t.”

“…Why do you suddenly want to teach me?”

“I’m not teaching you.”

This is a request. I whispered, and soon silence fell over the landscape.

***

K1.

Kade didn’t reply to her with, ‘I would understand even if that being a request is a lie.’

“Considering that you say ‘from now on’, you don’t seem to be dissatisfied with the current situation.”

“The current situation?”

“I mean, the way I’m treating you recklessly like you said.”

He just shot at her with a cold tone, like a habit.

However, as always, she didn’t respond much to his sharp words. In fact, no matter what he said, her attitude wouldn’t change.

For she didn’t appear to be much agitated by anything.

“If I say I have a complaint, will you fix it?”

Even at the moment she was asking such, she just stuck to her usual dull attitude. For some reason, Kade felt a faint irritation at the plain question, and he nervously turned his body around.

“No, it wouldn’t happen even if someone other than you asked.”

“I knew you would say that.”

He couldn’t figure out why the tone of words that he didn’t expect was circulating in his mind like this.

No matter how much he pondered, no answer came, thus he had better give up thinking. Kade started to walk faster than before, and soon followed by the sound of footsteps slightly smaller than his.

Although he didn’t immediately admit that his ego was threatened, his smart brain, which wasn’t a genius, had already reached a certain conclusion. A conclusion that Ei’s words might be right.

Kade hated people who didn’t make an effort the most. At first, regardless of whether or not they had the ability, only effort was his standard, yet as time passed, he hated people with no ability. At that point, how much effort they put in didn’t matter. Only the presence or absence of ability became the standard for Kade to evaluate someone.

As a result, he hated the so-called ordinary people, started to speak recklessly to them, and behaved the same way he had been doing to Ei, who hadn’t done anything too intrusive…

Besides, when he showed others that he was in a bad mood, they would lower their stance, yet the woman wasn’t even discouraged. The behavior made him feel worse, thus he spoke as if he was dealing with someone who had done something terribly wrong.

“Ha.”

It was only after he had been lost in thought that he realized that he was doing an untimely self-examination. So far, no one has pointed out his attitudes to him, and that’s why he has never even attempted a similar consideration.

In the end, the feeling that came to him after a long time was extreme displeasure.

He didn’t even know what he was thinking, and the sound of footsteps following him without saying a word was still audible. Why did it feel so pitiful for him not being able to say anything as simple as telling her to shut her mouth and go?

He turned his head, thinking that he should hasten his steps at least though still in a disapproving mood.

And.

“…”

As soon as the footsteps stopped, he saw an Illinan smirking and running away as soon as he met its eyes.

Before Kade could take any action, the monster that was chasing after him, ran away at a speed that he couldn’t handle. As it was extremely focused on running away, it didn’t even wear its specialty, illusion.

Kade confirmed Ei wasn’t behind him, and he found that he had returned to the place he should have been passing a long time ago. In the very place where he had a conversation with Ei.

He must have walked for a long time, lost in thought.

The intuition that something was wrong came quickly. And at the same time as that intuition, the idea that this was an ordinary forest with no danger except for Illinan’s habitat was quickly discarded.

If he was caught in an illusion with his eyes open, there was only one answer.

A hallucination hangs over this entire forest.

Upon realizing that fact, he quickly summoned the spirit. The spirit, which had been wandering around with a leisurely movement, landed on his hand.

Kade gritted his teeth as he stared at the spot where Ei had disappeared.