When Hugo returned to the mansion, it was already late into the night. He sat absentmindedly in his office for a while. He urged his brain to think but it refused to work properly. He didnāt know where he should start from.
āThe headache medicine. Yesā¦find out what happened with the headache medicine and thenā¦ā
After that was blank. His head was as empty as a blank sheet of paper. Nothing came up. He felt terribly helpless, like an abyss was slowly eaten away at him from his feet.
It was fear. His heart thumped with anxiety, growing louder by the minute and he felt suffocated. Even if he were about to die by having his limbs bound, stomach smashed, and heart ripped out, he would not be this scared.
Just thinking about the possibility of losing her filled Hugo with indescribable horror.
Hugo left his office at daybreak. He went into his wifeās bedroom, and stood idly by the bed, watching his wife who was sound asleep. He lifted the blanket, climbed onto the bed and pulled her into his chest. Her body was slightly hot due to her mild fever.
The happiness and despair filled his heart. He could not live if he lost her. He felt like his heart would explode and kill him.
[I have never said this, have I? Thank you for marrying me.]
āā¦Not at all. You fell into a terrible swamp.ā
She went through all sorts of trouble to get a child that everyone else has, and the child she got with difficulty, became the main culprit eating away her life.
The only reason she had to go through things other people didnāt was because she was married to him.
She should not have come to see him that day. If they had lived without knowing each otherā¦if that had happened, then she likely wouldnāt be facing such danger.
But if he had not met her, he would have lived with a frozen heart, watching a grey scenery for the rest of his life.<sup>This is him basically saying she brought color into his life.
T/N: Sorry if I over explain things. If I feel like the authorās meaning isnāt well portrayed in english, I try to put further explanation.