Going to university, you are faced with an entirely different environment and you are forced into making new friends.
The fact that Xie Zhe likes Xiao Yuxin actually wasnât much of a secret. His closest friends all knew about it including Jiang Yang, Qin Xu and Huang Shao
When Huang Shao that guy became aware that his good friends were all bent, his reaction was very funny. With large widened eyes, the first words that came out of his mouth wasnât him expressing disdain or him expressing his incomprehension of how they had become bent. Instead, he started suspecting whether he is completely straight after being exposed to those friends of his! He asked: âWhich one of you likes me?â
Black lines appeared on all their faces.
They all very unanimously shook their heads.
Huang Shao expressed disbelief, âIf you guys like men, why donât any of you like me?! Am I not good enough?!â
That question was asked very accusingly, and it was filled with grievances. They quickly waved their hands and nonchalantly said: âNo, no, no. Youâre too good. We think that weâre not good enough for you.â
Hearing this, Huang Shao raised his eyebrows in satisfaction.
They had thought that it would be a very difficult experience coming out to a friend, but it ended up becoming a very relaxed conversation. Huang Shao didnât care if his friends are homosexuals. What he was more concerned about was that when they went out in the future to play, they would be acting lovey-dovey in front of his single-dog self!
As for Xie Zheâs situation, Huang Shao laughed at him while saying that a playboy like him who looked like he didnât have any trouble in love is actually so timid and slow. By the time he will manage to get together with the other person, the cucumbers would have already cooled down!
Xie Zhe had thought a lot and worried for a long time about his feelings for Xiao Yuxin. At the beginning, he just simply found him interesting and liked to tease him so that he could see his reactions but before he knew it, those feelings of his had slowly changed. More and more, he wanted to get closer and he wished for Xiao Yuxin to look at him.
But when his feelings for Xiao Yuxin deepened, he also became cautious and timid. At the beginning, he had acted arrogantly but later, he started worrying about Xiao Yuxinâs impression of him. Would he think heâs being too flirty? Would he be bothered?
Of course, it wasnât like he hadnât considered the idea of confessing. Back in third year when they did the shouting event, after hearing someone else shouting out their confession for another person, he also impulsively shouted it out. When he was done, he was both nervous and excited. He quickly looked over to check Xiao Yuxinâs reaction but the gaze that he received back was very at loss. Then the other students who thought that Xie Zhe was only joking around started professing their undying âloveâ to friends before laughing as a crowd.
But this fear of becoming hated after confessing gradually disappeared and had turned into inner bitterness. He didnât dare confess to Xiao Yuxin because he was afraid of rejection and also because he understood that Xiao Yuxin is very simple. With him valuing his studies so much and wishing to get into a good university, Xie Zhe didnât want to bother him. So, he decided that he would do it after they had graduated from high school.
Like this, it dragged on until they were almost halfway through freshman year in university.
Xie Zheâs performance in the exam was pretty good but compared to Xiao Yuxin, there was still a certain gap. They didnât enter the same university, but they enrolled into universities in the same district, so it wasnât too far away, and they could easily visit if they had time.
Xie Zhe would often invite him out when he is free and use this opportunity to pursue him and test out Xiao Yuxinâs level of acceptance for homosexuality.
After visiting often, Xie Zhe and his handsome appearance had become a hot topic across Xiao Yuxinâs university. He was known as the school idol from the IT department at B University. Whenever he passes by, many girls would start gossiping with each other and his photos were also shared on the school forums. But in pretty much all the photos, he was standing together with Xiao Yuxin.
Xiao Yuxin is also well-known in the school. He had the reputation of the top student who was almost always in the library, topping almost all the exams, actively participating in competitions and someone that loves studying and actively talks to the teacher. Therefore, whenever Xie Zhe comes to find him to play, they would often hang out at the library, attend classes together, immerse themselves in the wonderful sea of knowledgeâŚâŚâŚAs if! Xie Zhe really wants to cry okay?! Whoâs going to believe him if he says that the biggest obstacle in his pursuit for love is studying?!
Moreover, Xie Zhe noticed that despite being annoyed at first, after accompanying Xiao Yuxin for a while, he was also influenced by him and felt that if they had time to go out and play, they might as well stay in the library to study and enrich themselves?
Over time, they even grown accustomed to this form of interaction. While Xie Zhe was being basked in the holy light of knowledge, he had almost forgotten his original purpose of coming here! And Xiao Yuxin who was only eager to absorb more knowledge from the books is very dense. He only thought that Xie Zhe was a good friend.
If Xie Zhe knew what he was thinking, Xie Zhe would definitely curse out âââ Friend your mum!
Later, Xiao Yuxin saw a book that Xie Zhe liked at a bookstore and proceeded to happily purchase it. His first thought was to go to Xie Zheâs school to deliver it to him but this excitement of his didnât last very long. This was because when he found Xie Zhe, he and his classmates just happened to be talking about him.
A classmate said: âDo you know the study god from A University? The girls in the foreign language faculty knew about him and asked me if I had his contact information. Thereâs already so much disparity between genders in our science and technology faculties and now men from other universities are coming here to steal our reserves, sigh.â
Xie Zheâs tone was calm, âOh, so what of it?â
The classmate said: âMy club wants to arrange a get together between the two schools. Do you want to attend? You can also call up the study god. I heard that he doesnât participate in these activities.â
Xie Zhe frowned, âHeâs not my friend.â
The moment this sentence fell into Xiao Yuxinâs ear, the hand holding the book slowly fell and the corners of his lips lowered. There no longer was an expression on his face.
Turns out, he had never considered me a friend.
Xiao Yuxin felt a little embarrassed about himself thinking that he was in a pretty good relationship with Xie Zhe. Even though he had become a university student, he still had a high school friend who would visit from time to time. When he was slowly getting adapted to the new environment, he had Xie Zhe with him which gave him a peace of mind. But after hearing that sentence, Xiao Yuxin started suspecting that he was just overthinking things all along.
And so, he didnât make any noise and silently turned to leave without giving Xie Zhe the book that he had bought for him. Since then, his attitude towards Xie Zhe who came over to find him had also grown colder.
Xie Zhe isnât dense. He would easily notice changes in another person, particularly if it is someone he likes but when he asked him about it, Xiao Yuxin would just give him a random excuse.
Xie Zhe got more and more annoyed. He was already in a bad mood because his classmate had asked him to bring Xiao Yuxin to a get together and even said that they were friends. Who wants to be friends with Xiao Yuxin? His intentions arenât that pure! If he could, he would like to hug, kiss and touch him intimatelyâŚâŚâŚ.Who the fuck would want to be friends! Whatâs so good about being friends?!
But just when his mood was bad, things got worse.
Xiao Yuxin and the school flower from the Chinese department was involved together in a rumour. There was a post with a picture of them walking side by side chatting and laughing. The poster even spoke of it as if they are already dating and that they had personally heard them admit it in person.
When Xie Zhe heard the news, he was so angry steam rose from his head. Xie Zhe ah, Xie Zhe. Look at you wasting your time away being hesitant and cautious. Now that the other person has left his single status, are you filled with regrets now?
While he scolded himself harshly, his body still rushed over to Xiao Yuxinâs school. He wanted to confirm that rumours are just rumours.
But in fact, the rumour was half true. Although they were not dating, the school flower likes Xiao Yuxin and had been secretly pursing him.
Xiao Yuxin looks were quite pure and refreshing. Although he is not as tall as Xie Zhe nor is he as eye-catching, he wasnât bad appearance-wise. His eyes are clear and bright, his temperament is also very smooth and calm. He just happened to be the kind of white shirted, kind and handsome school idol that girls liked.
The Chinese department school flower liked this type of boy, so Xiao Yuxin just happened to hit all the right spots. Even if she is embarrassed, she tried hard to get to know him and get close to him.
When Xie Zhe found Xiao Yuxin, Xiao Yuxin was talking to the school flower. The two were wearing the same coloured sweaters making them look like a good-looking pair of couple wearing matching couple outfits. Their smiles looked very sweet and this made Xie Zhe who saw it feel both annoyed and angry,
He clenched his fists and tried his best to maintain a calm smile but with his bad mood, his face still darkened a few shades. He then walked over to them.
The school flower was a little surprised, ââŚâŚâŚ.You are?â
Xie Zhe forced out a smile, âHello, I am Xiao Yuxinâs friend, Xie Zhe. I just need him for something.â
Xiao Yuxin didnât expect to see him so suddenly and was a little stunned. But his thoughts were mostly focused on the word, âfriendâ. Friend? Didnât he say that weâre not friends? Why are we friends again so suddenly?
Xiao Yuxin couldnât understand this two-faced act of his. Could it be that Xie Zhe doesnât like him, and even hated him? But if he hated him, why would he go and find him so often? Wouldnât it be better not to see him instead?
He really couldnât understand it.
However, why he was still thinking over things, Xie Zhe had already angrily pulled him by his wrist and dragged him over to a secluded grove behind the teaching building. He pressed him against the wall with his palm next to his head and looked at him with a burning gaze. It was as if he had just done something unforgivable to him.
Finally, Xiao Yuxin couldnât help but speak up before Xie Zhe could say anything, âDidnât you say that weâre not friends?â
Xie Zhe who had his anger boiling all the way up to his throat and was ready to complain was caught off-guard, âWhen did I say that?â
âOn the Friday afternoon the week before last. You said that to your classmate and I accidentally overheard.â Xiao Yuxin gave him a faint look. His eyes appeared calm but Xie Zhe could see a faint hint of grievance within it.
âI didnât!â Xie Zhe subconsciously denied it first. But after thinking about it, he recalled why he said those words at that that time. He then furrowed his brows in annoyance and reluctantly admitted it: âI said it! Thatâs right. I have never treated you as my friend. But that is because I like you! I donât want to be just a friend, I want to be your boyfriend, be together with you! I have liked you since second year but you had never noticed my feelings and I didnât want to bother you while you were preparing for the college entrance examinations. But after almost a whole semester, you didnât get the feeling that I was pursing you?! If I donât like you, why would I come here everyday to find you, eat with you, hand out in the library with you or attend classes together?â
Xiao Yuxin was a little stunned by all the things that he had blurted out. Only after a while, he realised that it was a confession. With some disbelief, ââŚâŚâŚ.It wasnât because you wanted to learn? The library at our school is biggerâŚâŚâŚâŚâ
Xie Zhe scoffed, âYou think Iâm coming here everyday to find you because I like your schoolâs library?â
YesâŚâŚâŚBut under his menacing stare, Xiao Yuxin was afraid to nod his head. He felt that his would be bitten the moment he admits it.
Xie Zhe then said: âYou didnât have any response when I pursed you, but you have feelings now that the school flower is pursing you?â
Based on his qualities, Xie Zhe didnât think that he was inferior to the other person. But the school flower is female, and his biggest disadvantage was his gender. If Xiao Yuxin couldnât accept a member of the same sexâŚ. This time, he decided to just risk everything and clear everything up in one go.
Xiao Yuxin was even more confused, âThe school flower is pursing me?â
Xie Zhe frowned, âYou didnât know?â
ââŚâŚ..I didnât know.â
Xie Zhe was a little annoyed. He regretted saying all those things earlier.
Xie Zhe asked the question that he was most concerned about: âAre you going to be together with her?â
Xiao Yuxin was stunned. He then shook his head.
âWhat about me? I just confessed to you. Donât think that you can act like you didnât hear it.â
Xie Zhe had endured for a long time. When he finally said it, he felt immensely relieved, but he was also immediately nervous about his reply. He leaned forward and brought his face very close to Xiao Yuxinâs. It was to the point that they could breath each otherâs breaths and this distance between them looked extremely ambiguous. Xiao Yuxin was completely enveloped by his shadow.
Xiao Yuxinâs mind was completely blank. His face reddened at a speed that was visible to the naked eye and it looked like it was about to bleed. His eyes trembled constantly as he tried to avoid his passionate gaze. He didnât understand how the situation had changed so suddenly. He clearly thought that Xie Zhe hated him and they werenât even friends but now he suddenly saysâŚâŚâŚthat he likes him?
Itâs too unreal.
Also, itâs too close. Breathing is a little hard.
Xiao Yuxin raised his hand and wanted to push him away.
But Xie Zhe grabbed his hand and immediately interrupted his attempt to escape.
âYou really didnât notice that I like you? Itâs so obvious. Didnât you find out about Qin Xu and Jiang Yang very quickly?â
Xiao Yuxin was a little scared by this situation he is faced with and was a little tongue-tied, âThatâs not the sameâŚâŚâŚâ
âWhatâs not the same? Do you hate me?â Xie Zhe persisted.
Xiao Yuxin shook his head, âNo.â
Xie Zhe quietly breathed a sigh of relief. His voice was tense, but he did his best to hide his uneasiness, âThen would you be willing to try it out with me?â
Xiao Yuxin looked down and remained silent.
Xie Zheâs heart sank a little. There was no light in his eyes. The hand supporting him on the wall also fell lifelessly.
But at this moment, Xiao Yuxinâs small voice could be heard, ââŚâŚâŚ.Okay. Letâs try. But I havenât dated before. If itâs youâŚâŚâŚ..â
Xie Zheâs eyes lit up brightly. He was both surprised and elated, âDo you mean it?!â
Xiao Yuxin nodded his head hard. He scratched his face with some embarrassment, âItâs just that I donât know what to do when youâre datingâŚâŚ..â
Xie Zhe raised a big smile, âItâs okay. We can just do what we want to do.â
He was in an extremely good mood. He hesitated for a moment and said âââ-
âBut, there is one thing that I have always wanted to do.â
âWhat?â
Xiao Yuxin looked up with a questioning look. At this moment he was caught off-guard by Xie Zheâs deep kiss. He was kissed until he was almost out of breath.
The two slender figures kissed in the corner. Under the sunlight, two long shadows gently blended together as if it could no longer be separated.