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Chapter 73
Chapter 73
Translated by Naralara
Edited by Naralara
“It’s okay. I’m not doing anything today.”
Lee Wooyeon said while applying medicine to Inseop’s wrist. Every time he touched Inseop’s hand, he trembled. Even though he was the one who did it, Lee Wooyeon was bitter.
He shoved the painkiller he had brought from the hotel lobby into Inseop’s mouth. He made him drink water from a cup.
The swelling of the wrist had subsided a little compared to before. Lee Wooyeon insisted on going to the hospital, but Inseop did not listen to him until the end. Eventually, Inseop was led by Lee Wooyeon to his room on the 12th floor. Lee Wooyeon took off Inseop’s wet clothes first and made him change into his own.
After applying the medicine to Inseop’s wrist, Lee Wooyeon placed a thin towel on top and a towel soaked in hot water. Inseop just sat still and watched what he was doing.
At Lee Wooyeon’s words that he would not be able to go anywhere, Inseop was quite shocked and was in a state of exhaustion. The hope that he might be able to go to the United States after two weeks was what kept Inseop going.
“What do you want to eat?”
“… … .”
He shook his head.
“Aren’t you thirsty?”
“… … .”
This time he nodded. Lee Wooyeon sat next to Choi Inseop. Inseop shivered and stepped back slightly from his seat.
“Are you scared? Are you afraid that I will hold on to the sick Mr. Inseop and commit a crime?”
“… … .”
“I’m not a fucking bastard. Don’t worry.”
When Lee Wooyeon reached out to brush Inseop’s hair, Inseop turned his face to the side in surprise. Lee Wooyeon had no choice but to sit away from Inseop. The two sat silently across the bed for a while. There was an awkward silence. It was like they went back to the first time they met.
Choi Inseop thought about what he would say so that he could go back downstairs. Lee Wooyeon asked with his eyes down.
“Have you made a decision?”
“What?”
“A place you want to go.”
He decided to finish reading the book tonight. Of course, in this situation now, the book would not have caught his eye, and even if there was a place he wanted to go, he did not want to go with Lee Wooyeon.
“I want to go home.”
“No.”
“Then, no.”
Inseop answered firmly. Although his crying voice and frightened eyes were still there, Lee Wooyeon could read the firm will in his heart.
“There is a pineapple farm, would you like to visit? Inseop, do you like pineapple?”
Lee Wooyeon asked in a casual tone. Inseop didn’t say anything.
“Would you like to go to the North Beach? There’s a shrimp truck. It’s a Hawaiian specialty.”
“… … .”
“Or shall we go to the island? If we go to Maui, there is Haleakala Park. Let’s watch the sunrise there together. We can stay one more day.”
“… … .”
Inseop stubbornly kept his mouth shut and just sat there. Lee Wooyeon was angry. The thought that he had to hold on to him somehow froze.
“That doesn’t mean I’ll let you go.”
“… … I know.”
“If you know, please be obedient. You have to do well in the future.”
Lee Wooyeon did not miss the fact that Inseop’s expression darkened at the word ‘in the future’. Lee Wooyeon stood up from his seat with a sulky expression.
“I’ll go and smoke a cigarette.”
“… …Okay.”
Lee Wooyeon’s room was a suite with a balcony and a private swimming pool. He took a cigarette and lighter from his bag and went out to the balcony. Inseop sighed.
When he pressed his wrist with his fingers, it didn’t seem like there was anything wrong with the bones. It was more swollen than painful, so it felt burdensome to move.
On his finger, on his wrist, … … He once cut his fingers with a knife before.
Inseop smiled bitterly as he looked down at the hand that was suffering particular hardship. After meeting Lee Wooyeon, it was thought that there were no holy places in his body. Although the mind was more torn than the body.
It was his first trip, and it ended up like this. Inseop looked down at his throbbing wrist and thought that maybe this was a natural result. It was unusual for Lee Wooyeon to be so kind that it was useless.
Now this was the starting point.
As Lee Wooyeon said. The reason for staying by his side was his own will. It would be foolish to procrastinate any longer with the pretext of revenge for Jennie. So, leaving him must be his own will.
Somehow, somehow, he will try to prevent as much damage as possible to others, and he will leave everything. Even if he goes to jail, he will feel more comfortable than being with Lee Wooyeon. … … Really, he couldn’t stand Lee Wooyeon any longer.
“Mr. Inseop.”
As soon as he came in, Lee Wooyeon stood in front of the bed and called out Choi Inseop’s name. Inseop raised his head in surprise.
“Do you want to go out?”
Lee Wooyeon pointed to the balcony. To be honest, he wanted to lie down on the bed right now, but Inseop just stood up because he did not want to create a strange atmosphere for nothing.
Lee Wooyeon took out the blanket that was on the bed sheet and wrapped it around Inseop’s shoulder. … … This was bad. This was a foul. He thought it would be nice if someone drew a line between kindness to Lee Wooyeon.
As Inseop went out to the balcony, Lee Wooyeon sat him down on the full bed.
“Look at that.”
Lee Wooyeon pointed to the sky. Inseop, who involuntarily raised his head as he pointed, exclaimed, “Ah.”
A rainbow was floating in the night sky as it was raining. Beautiful colors were mixed in the dark indigo blue sky and it was shining softly. Inseop could not take his eyes off the spectacle created by the lights of the full moon that had risen.
“Is it beautiful?”
“… … Yes.”
An honest answer came out. Seeing Inseop open his mouth and looking at the sky, Lee Wooyeon laughed softly and muttered.
“It must be nice to see that and feel that way.”
“… … ?”
“I’m just guessing. I thought it would be beautiful to others.”
At first glance, Inseop did not understand Lee Wooyeon’s words, so he blinked a couple of times and waited for his next words.
“What was Philip like?”
“Yes? … … , Why… … . suddenly.”
Inseop couldn’t figure out why Lee Wooyeon was talking about the past.
“He was a great quarterback, and his girlfriend was the cheerleader leader, and so on.”
“… … . … … .”
“He was the son of a great family. This is a fact you already know, right? Stalker.”
Lee Wooyeon’s voice, calling Inseop a stalker, was playful. But there was no playfulness in his eyes. That was what he was talking about. Inseop was very nervous and nodded his head.
“Yes. That’s right.”
“Have you ever thought about why I came to Korea to become an actor?”
“… … I have.”
There were countless rumors about it. When he found out that Philip, who suddenly disappeared from the United States, was making a living as an actor in Korea under the name of Lee Wooyeon, Inseop first thought it was absurd. A student from a prestigious university who played football was an actor. It was an impossible combination.
“What do you think is the reason?”
“I don’t know.”
Numerous theories had been formulated, but the conclusion had always been that same. He did not know.
Inseop couldn’t figure out why Lee Wooyeon thought about coming to Korea to become an actor.
Lee Wooyeon, who was silent for a moment, asked.
“Do you know what APD is?”
“What is it?”
“Antisocial personality disorder.”
“… … antisocial personality disorder… … Is that correct?”
“Yes.”
Lee Wooyeon sat down next to Inseop. He spoke bluntly.
“That’s me.”
“… … .”
“These days, they are often referred to as sociopaths and psychopaths, but the symptoms are not exactly the same, but they are similar.”
“… … .”
Inseop was confused because he did not know why Lee Wooyeon was telling him such a scary story.
“I was not diagnosed with APD. You have to be 15 or older to make that diagnosis, but by then I knew how to behave to look like a normal person. Later, I had a major accident. Of course, it would not have been known because of money and status. Still, I was kicked out to Korea.”
“… … .”
Inseop swallowed.
When he was in the United States, he had the courage to go to Philip’s house to hear from him. Of course, he came back after being thrown out from the front door. He couldn’t figure out anything. Phillip disappeared from there, as if he had never existed.
“Do you know the word unwritten intention?”
“I don’… … know.”
“Unwritten intention refers to a case in which an actor judges that his/her act is likely to fall under the constituting factor of a crime and conducts the act in a state of anticipating the consequences. For example, if I want to start a fire right now, but I know that Inseop is sleeping in the house, but I just want to start a fire, so I start a fire, then the crime of arson is added to the crime of intentional murder.”
Inseop got goosebumps at the eerie metaphor.
“Don’t worry. I won’t do that because it’s annoying.”
Lee Wooyeon laughed as if it was joke, but now the joke was not heard lightly.
“People like me live a life full of unwritten intentions.”
“… … .”
“There is no standard for judgment about the importance or seriousness of work. Do you understand?”
Lee Wooyeon smiled and asked again, but Inseop couldn’t even nod his head. He thought it was simply a bad personality trait, but because it was a mental problem that was classified as a disability, he couldn’t help but feel creeped out.
“Mr. Inseop, you shouldn’t hurt people, you shouldn’t bully animals, you can understand these things without having to explain them, right?”
“Of course… … .”
Of course, as Inseop was about to say yes, he shut his mouth. For this man, the standard of being natural was not established at all.
“Yeah. Of course. Just as you think the sky is pretty, it must be a natural fact.”
“… … .”
“So it is difficult for me to tell whether my feelings are the same as those of other people or different. In fact, I’ve never felt emotions that I felt confused.”
“… … .”
“I don’t even know what I’m trying to do right now.”
Having said that, Lee Wooyeon wiped Inseop’s cheek with his finger. Inseop couldn’t believe the fact that a man with such a friendly hand couldn’t feel his emotions properly. Lee Wooyeon, who had been quietly touching Inseop, continued speaking with a slight frown as if he was troubled.
“It’s not difficult to blend into society and pretend to be a normal person. It’s just a matter of figuring out how other people feel and pretending to be that way. I am a good actor. I won awards at film festivals.”
Seeing Lee Wooyeon’s smiling face while saying that, Inseop’s heart ached.
“But Choi Inseop… … , that is not enough.”
“… … .”
“I can’t do it properly. I can’t calm myself down. I don’t even know why I am like this.”
“… … . … … .”
Inseop’s heart warmed. Even though he thought he shouldn’t, Lee Wooyeon’s words kept sounding like a confession.
“I don’t know where to start and how to deal with my emotions, and I often lose the string I’m holding on to. That’s why I keep hurting Inseop.”
Lee Wooyeon gently wiped Inseop’s face. His cheeks and eyes, forehead and earlobes.
Just like a blind person groping for something precious with his fingertips, Lee Wooyeon touched Inseop’s face.
When Lee Wooyeon’s finger touched his lips, Inseop lowered his head. While hearing that this person’s feelings were different from his own, and even being told that it may be the wrong emotion, he wanted Lee Wooyeon to be with him.
Was the feeling of liking someone so selfish?
After Lee Wooyeon let out a long, long speech, he hesitated for a moment and then started to wipe Inseop’s lips with his hand.
“What I’m trying to say is, … … I don’t feel that the sky is beautiful, but I want Choi Inseop to look at it and think that it is beautiful.”
“… … .”
“Isn’t this enough?”
Lee Wooyeon asked. The voice that asked that question suddenly felt lonely, so Inseop raised his head and looked into his eyes. When their eyes met, Lee Wooyeon smiled kindly. With beautiful eyes, Lee Wooyeon was looking at Inseop.
… … Hewished someone would teach him how to reject this person, Inseop thought.
He lowered his head and kissed Inseop. Inseop’s face quickly turned red at the touch of his lips moving softly closer and further away.
When Lee Wooyeon saw that, he gave out a pleasant laugh.
“I guess I really am a fucking asshole”
With those words, Lee Wooyeon embraced Inseop in his arms and began to kiss fiercely. The blanket wrapped around Inseop’s shoulders fell at his feet.
“Are you awake?”
Lee Wooyeon, who was looking at Inseop’s wrist, felt him waking up and asked.
“… … Yes.”
“Your voice went out. You screamed so much yesterday.”
“… … .”
“You’d rather not speak.”
He pulled his sheet and placed it on Inseop’s body. And then gently stroked his hair.
Choi Inseop looked at Lee Wooyeon, and intertwined his fingers with his. Lee Wooyeon paused and looked at Inseop.
“The morning shoot… … .”
“I have to go filming in the morning.”
“… … Sorry… …”
“What are you apologizing for? You made my dickhave so much fun yesterday.”
“… … .”
No matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t seem to be able to get used to that vulgar expression. Lee Wooyeon kissed Inseop’s shoulder. Inseop shivered at the tickling sensation and smiled.
“You should laugh too.”
“… … .”
“Laugh a little. Why are you not smiling more when you’re not as fucked up like me?”
Just after hearing the great secret from Lee Wooyeon yesterday, Inseop could not hide his puzzled expression on how to react to such a joke.
“Ha ha ha ha ha. You are very confused right now.”
“… … .”
“I shouldn;t have told you. What if you run away?”
The hand that was stroking his hair quickly gained strength. Pulling his hair to the point where it hurts, Lee Wooyeon said softly,
“If you run away, really, I swear, I will kill you.”
“… … .”
“Don’t you ever stab me in the back again. I can’t stand it twice.”
“… … Okay.”
“But I won’t give you your passport.”
“… … Do whatever you want.”
When Choi Inseop spoke in a slightly quarrelsome tone, Lee Wooyeon burst into laughter again.
“If it wasn’t for the morning shoot, I wouldn’t have taken my cock out of Mr. Inseop’s hole.”
“… … !”
“Go to sleep. I’ll come when I’m done. If you are hungry, you can order room service. Don’t worry, you’ll speak English better than me.”
His fingers, scattered in his hair, caressed Inseop’s cheek. At that gentle touch, Inseop made a scruffy face and smiled at Lee Wooyeon. Lee Wooyeon bent down and kissed Inseop once more. Then, before Inseop got up, he left the room.
Inseop, who had been tormented by him all night, closed his eyes again and went to sleep. Unlike Lee Wooyeon, who has a steel-like body, Inseop’s body was made of bones and flesh, so he was drenched in exhaustion. He quickly fell into a deep sleep.
How long has it been? He heard someone knock on the door.
Has filming already finished?
Inseop forced his eyes open and checked his watch. It had been quite a while since Lee Wooyeon left. Another knock was heard. Inseop went outside wearing a robe.
<Who is it? What happened?>
He wondered if Lee Wooyeon had ordered a meal and left, so he asked in English. But the answer came back in Korean.
“I… … Lee Wooyeon, isn’t it his room?”
“Yes. Hold on, wait a minute.”
Inseop looked in the mirror, adjusted his clothes, and opened the door. Surprisingly, Lee Dayoung was standing in front of the door.
“Uh… … . How here… … .”
“I had something to give, so I went to look for Lee Wooyeon, but there were people there, so he said to leave… … .”
Inseop could guess that Lee Wooyeon had sent Lee Dayoung here on purpose.
… … Really, Lee Wooyeon’s way of thinking was hard to follow.
“Wow. But did Inseop just speak English? Your pronunciation is at the level of a native speaker. How many TOEIC points?”
“Just… … .”
“By the way, did you sleep here?”
Lee Dayoung widened her eyes as she looked inside the luxurious suite.
“… … Yes.”
“I envy you! I also want to be Lee Wooyeon’s manager. Mr Inseop. I envy you.”
Inseop did not know how to respond to her selfless and honest reaction, only scratching his head.
“Oh right. This. The head of the travel agency told me that he had a copy of some documentary evidence.”
“Thank you.”
Inseop took the envelope and thanked her.
“You are going to stay here one more day. I’m jealous. We’re going by plane tonight.”
“You must be tired, so be careful.”
“If you come to Seoul, please contact me. Oh right, right, do you know my phone number?”
As Inseop shook his head, Dayoung took out her phone from her pocket.
“Give me your phone number and I’ll text you.”
“… … I don’t have a cell phone right now.”
“No paper?”
Inseop said, “Wait a minute,” and went inside and brought a notepad and pen. Lee Dayoung wrote her phone number on a note and handed it to Inseop.
“Here you go. Call me. I made a mistake with Mr. Inseop yesterday, so after we go to Seoul, I’ll treat you to lunch.”
“You don’t have to.”
“I don’t feel comfortable. Then see you next time.”
She smiled brightly and disappeared. Inseop closed the door and breathed a sigh of relief. He never thought that Lee Wooyeon would send someone he knew here. What was he thinking… … .
“Ha… … . really.”
As he walked to the bed with a sigh, he wondered what the documents were sent by the head of the travel agency.
“What?”
If he told her to hand it over to him, that means he can see what’s inside. Inseop sat on the bed and took out the documents from the envelope and read them. After a moment, his eyes widened in surprise.