Chapter 62

Yan Zhengming hears himself, no, his disciple grandfather say in a hoarse voice. “How can I change it?”

Xu Yingzhi casts his gaze downward, and says with a touch of apathy, “Tong Ru, if you believe in Fate, you should already know what ‘it has been decided in the primordial darkness’ is. This is not something a mortal can change. If you don’t, you should at least learn that ‘The idea of ‘capability’ is the gilt of the Tao and the root of ignorance1’. The so-called ability to know what happened in the past five hundred years and what will happen in the next five hundred years is only a delusion. Still, you on one hand believe that what you saw in the ‘Three Lives mystic site’ will happen, while on the other hand ask me how to change it. Don’t you think that’s absurd? My advice is that you should go with the flow. Don’t let yourself be stuck in a corner.”

Although Yan Zhengming doesn’t know what ‘Three Lives mystic site’ or ‘die young’ are about, he feels the Xu geezer is only good at empty words.

Hearing that, Lord Beiming - Tong Ru says nothing for a long while, but once again Yan Zhengming can feel the familiar helplessness and anger burn in his chest.

He suddenly understands why he keeps being drawn in by his disciple grandfather, whom he has never met. The two of them seem to be connected by having the same problem.

Xu Yingzhi draws a line in the air with his fingers. The three coins jump into his palm. The callouses on the tips of his fingers seem to be caused by countless attempts of divining Fate.

He sighs and says in a softer tone. “From ancient times, prosperity goes hand in hand with decline; success goes hand in hand with failure. For cultivators like us, shouldn’t that be well understood? To walk this path, in the end, aren’t our competitions and struggles with the karmic cycle all for the purpose of reaching the Great Way and gaining immortality, so that we can escape mortal sufferings? Tong Ru, the Heavens grant you great talents, such that you can go further than other people. Whether it’s your family or fellow members of your sect, they’re all of this transient world, and thus an illusion. You should soon get rid of all of that. Don’t get lost in your obsession and fail to reach enlightenment.”

Tong Ru says, “I don’t…”

Xu Yingzhi interrupts him, “To long for a person means to hold an obsession. Whom do you long for?”

Tong Ru looks away to avoid his gaze. After a moment, he asks, “If someday you divine that your lifespan is about to end, can you say ‘attachments in this transient world should be severed’ so easily like that?”

Without any change on his face, Xu Yingzhi says, “The mushroom and the cicada, the worm and myself, there is no difference. Isn’t it absurd to resent the Heaven and Earth?”

Observing from the outside, Yan Zhengming can see that, to the lord of the Vermilion Bird Tower, it’s no difference whether to be alive to turn into a stone statue. In his eyes, nothing in the world matters, everything is trivial. He gets involved in things like this only because he has too much time on his hands.

To think about it-

Throughout times, under the eternal sky, does the rise and fall of a single country matter that much?

In the vast world, among the many people who are mostly the same, is the fate of an individual that important?

Looking down from high above, what Xu Yingzhi said isn’t wrong. Everyone understands this truth. However, in the small, transient world, from an individual, a family to a nation, who isn’t doing their best for the ‘trivial affairs’? Compared to the eternity, all of such life and death, encounter and parting, love and hatred don’t matter anymore than waves on the sea.

However, obviously, how can it not be a heart-wrenching pain when one directly experiences such matters?

From a distance, anyone can see the entire awe-inspiring scenery of endless mountains and rivers. But when one is on the mountain itself, deep in the clouds, who can tell where they are?

As Yan Zhengming scrunches his nose in annoyance and tries to escape this bizarre place, his perspective changes. His disciple grandfather Tong Ru stands up as he says, “Yingzhi, you’re wrong. Countless seniors have tried to achieve immortality, but who among them has succeeded? A lifespan will end sooner or later. I’m similar to the insects, but I’m different from them too. Both they and I have transient lives. However, they will turn into dust, while even if my body is dead, my soul can live on in the lineage of Fuyao Mountain. As long as the inheritance of my sect isn’t interrupted, the lineage of my sect will continue. Why should I pursue that vague immortality?”

Xu Yingzhi can see that they are on totally different paths, so all advice is pointless. He says, “Fine, if you insist on thinking like that, I have nothing else to say. But I really can’t help you. What you see in the Three Lives mystic site will happen. The ‘life’ of Fuyao Sect is really going to end. What are you going to do? From ancient times, the ones that risked everything to defy Heaven’s will only got the opposite of what they wanted. Do you want to walk that path too?”

“Don’t forget, ‘the Great Way has fifty parts, celestial divination reveals forty nine’2. Nothing can be perfect, but there is always a route for survival,” Tong Ru says, “I will definitely find that survival route.”

Having said that, he turns to leave.

Xu Yingzhi suddenly calls out, “Wait, Xiao-Chun…”

Tong Ru stops in his tracks. Hanging his head, he sighs. “It isn’t what you think.”

Xu Yingzhi asks, “Then what is he to you?”

Tong Ru replies. “Throughout the years, Jiang Peng is my disciple in name only. I often don’t even see him. Xiao-Chun is my only disciple. I don’t have any dirty thoughts about him. It’s just that…”

At this point, as if feeling that it’s rather pointless to explain this matter to an outsider, he smiles slightly, then disappears with just a few steps.

Yan Zhengming: “…”

He can clearly feel the immense exhaustion that rises in the heart of his disciple grandfather. The loneliness of a thousand years in the wilderness only disperses thanks to that person alone. After a long time depending on each other, the bond is as deep as the Beiming sea. With just one look at that person, spring will bloom in the heart.

About the other thing… How dare I?

Yan Zhengming immediately grasps on the more questionable part, while doubting if there is something wrong with his sense and intelligence. The so-called ‘dirty thought’ is really as he understands it?

A bunch of absurd romantic theories burst out in Sect Leader Yan’s head, to the point that he feels he becomes dirty, and the propriety of a sect leader on him has been smashed to pieces beyond help.

At that moment, the scene in front of him changes. A second later, as his vision swirls, he is already back with his disciple grandfather to Fuyao Mountain.

Yan Zhengming doesn’t have the heart to speculate about the dirty history of his senior’s love life anymore. His heart beating faster, he hopes his disciple grandfather would slow his steps, so that he can borrow the vision of the past and see Fuyao Mountain once more.

However, his disciple grandfather is faster than a rabbit. Everything passes by in a flash as they reach the back of the mountain.

The Valley of the Yao has already been wide open. Zipeng Zhenren and some great yao that Yan Zhengming doesn’t know seem to try to persuade Tong Ru about something. In the chaotic noise, Yan Zhengming can’t hear anything clearly, but he can sense that these yao want to stop Tong Ru from doing what he has planned.

Tong Ru remains set in his ways. He lets himself fall down the abyss in the valley.

Yan Zhengming feels like his eyes are about to fall out. Right after that, as his vision blurs while he is still on the body of Tong Ru, he feels an immense pain, like his heart were pierced by thousands of arrows. Even with the determination of a sword cultivator, he is kicked out.

When Yan Zhengming regains his consciousness as he pants, he sees Tong Ru is kneeling on a very high platform not far from him.

Is there such a place at the back of Fuyao Mountain?

Yan Zhengming doesn’t remember anything about this. He didn’t frequent the path at the back of the mountain, because he felt that there was something terrifying down in the deep valley. Even now he dares not look down.

He can’t help glancing at the stone steps Tong Ru has passed. What he sees is that the stone stairs seem to lead from the ground to the sky. There is no end in view, only countless steps one after another, which are hidden by the clouds. Each of the steps has a bloody footprint on it, making a chilling sight. It seems that it isn’t easy to climb these stairs at all.

Yan Zhengming looks back at Tong Ru. He is indeed kneeling in front of a stone.

Yan Zhengming rubs his eyes and cautiously approaches it, thinking. “Can it be, the stone in Xiao-Qian’s quarters came from here? Is it really the Wish Granting Stone that countless people lusted after on Azure Dragon Island? But… Is there really a stone that can grant a person’s wish?”

In general, Yan Zhengming has never desired any treasure. When he comes across interesting artifacts in the black market, he sells most of them. What he keeps mostly become toys for his junior brother and sister. A sword cultivator at his level doesn’t need any external artifact to help him. However, at this moment when he is staring at this infernally alluring stone, as soon as that thought crosses his mind, he can’t help thinking about the stone.

In their childhood, he and his fellow disciples used to play around in Cheng Qian’s quarters, but unless the weather was too hot, no one looked twice at this stone. Looking back, it was likely because they were still children and didn’t truly desire anything.

As if bewitched, Yan Zhengming thinks, if he had the stone right now, could he wish for the seal on Fuyao Mountain to open? Could they return to the past? So that Han Yuan wouldn’t fall into the demonic path, Cheng Qian wouldn’t go missing for a hundred years, their Master would live again, the Yan family would still be there, they would still stay on their mountain without a care about the outside world like wild birds, working or horsing around as they wished…

From the endless void, Yan Zhengming stares fixedly at the stone. As if possessed, he reaches out, and his hand goes through Tong Ru’s.

In that moment, he feels as if great bells were ringing right next to his ears, which nearly reaches his soul.

Across the hundred years, Tong Ru, whose blood filled his every step as he walked on the mountain path, resonates with Yan Zhengming as they both look for what they wish. The images of Cheng Qian getting colder and colder in his lap and his Master’s soul dispersing blend with each other. Yan Zhengming’s eyes redden. As he screams, the demon of the heart, which has been lurking for many years, finally emerges from his forehead. It appears in front of him and takes the form of Cheng Qian.

That’s a Cheng Qian covered in blood, as the hole in his chest seems unable to close. Forgetting where he is, Yan Zhengming shakily rushes forward to take Cheng Qian in his arms. “Someone, please help him! Master! Disciple grandfather! Where the hell are you? Help me see to Xiao-Qian!”

At that moment, the Wish Granting Stone suddenly gives off a greenish light. The light slowly flows out and covers Cheng Qian’s body, filling up the fatal wound on his chest and clearing up the blood bit by bit.

Yan Zhengming’s heart undergoes an upheaval of emotions, from the lowest point to the highest. He stares dazedly at Cheng Qian, as Xu Yingzhi’s question to Tong Ru rings by his ear: What is he to you?

Like he is asleep, Cheng Qian doesn’t move, quietly lying in Yan Zhengming’s lap. As if possessed, Yan Zhengming traces Cheng Qian’s cheek with his finger and stops at his lips. He touches those lips once, suddenly curls back his finger like he were burnt, then hesitantly touches them again.

What is he to you?

At that moment, Yan Zhengming seems to be split into two. One of his selves says with a righteous anger, “Cheng Qian is your junior brother. Are you an animal? Ridiculous!”

His other self stares at Cheng Qian’s pale lips despite his will. The emotion that day when he was in the sect leader seal that he didn’t know came from Lord Beiming or his own heart anxiously swirls in his chest. “This is my Xiao-Qian.”

At that moment, he finally sees clearly the nature of the demon of the heart that has been haunting him in the past days.

With an unbearable pain that seems to tear up his chest, Yan Zhengming holds Cheng Qian tightly, refusing to let go no matter what. Then, everything around him explodes, and Yan Zhengming’s primordial spirit is pushed back to his body.

As he opens his eyes, all he can see is that Li Yun worriedly shakes him and shouts something.

Without any warning, Yan Zhengming suddenly collapses. The snakes around them get into a frenzy and charge at him.

Theoretically, a sword cultivator who has reached ‘forming the blade’ level will be full of an aggressive energy to the bones. That should scare off demonic beings and protect him from all kinds of poisons. However, whatever those snakes are made of, they aren’t kept away by his threatening aura at all.

They are only afraid of Shuang Ren a little, as Cheng Qian’s sword clears up the area. But they just run away, not dying.

These snakes aren’t burnt by fire, or swept away by water, or torn apart by wind. They can’t be cut by a sword. Even the frosty aura only drives them back a little. However, although it feels chilly and humid inside the Vermillion Bird Tower, this is still a place dominated by the fire element. Here, Cheng Qian can’t do much.

Puddle flaps her wings and chirps. “What are they? Second Brother, didn’t you say the five elements gave rise to each other but also counteracted each other3, so everything had its nemesis? But why are they like this? Why do we keep being harassed by pests like this? Did our most senior brother recently change his perfume and attract them or something?”

Luckily, her most senior brother hasn’t woken up yet, or he would roast and eat her upon hearing this.

Cheng Qian on the other hand is startled, as he is suddenly reminded of something Tang Zhen once said. The five elements give rise to each other while counteracting each other. However, nothing can counteract demon of the heart, which can invade everywhere. No matter how brave or intelligent you are, you have no way to prevent or destroy it.

Cheng Qian withdraws all of his human aura and removes all distractions from his heart. Thus purified, his body becomes a frost-covered jade.

His effort immediately shows effect. All of the snakes consider him a nonliving object like Shuang Ren and instinctively avoid him. Cheng Qian fights against the ferocious fiery energy around the Vermilion Bird Tower and freezes both the inside and outside of the tower.

There is a thin layer of frost on the stone statue of Xu Yingzhi, as if there were a blizzard in the tower. The snakes are all chased to the corners like autumn wind sweeping the fallen leaves. At that moment, Cheng Qian catches a moving shadow from the corner of his eye, which intends to approach the only fire in the tower in the lantern.

Cheng Qian waits for it. He immediately charges it and slashes the shadow in the middle of its body into two.

A terrible screech disturbs the bells hanging outside the Vermilion Bird Tower, causing them to ring out. The two halves of the shadow suddenly become larger. Twisting, they combine with each other in the air and form a human shape. A familiar face appears and smiles ferociously to Cheng Qian. “Third Brother, are you trying to kill me to avenge yourself?”

The hand that is holding the sword of Cheng Qian trembles a little. The sword wind that is like the sea tide makes a swerve around the shadow and hits the Vermilion Bird Tower heavily. The impeccable disguise is immediately broken. The demonic being laughs softly and steps forward. Its brightly red eyes meet Cheng Qian’s gaze. The distance between the two of them is less than the span of a hand. The grown-up face of Han Yuan can be seen clearly.

“Senior brother,” He drawls the low voice of a grown man, and says softly, making the final words vaguely sound like a child trying to get attention, “There is a river over there. I wanted to catch some fish for you and our Master, but there was a big dog. It chased me…”

Those are precisely the words the little beggar said to Cheng Qian while their Master was asleep, back then when Muchun Zhenren took Cheng Qian and Han Yuan back to the sect. There was no mistake at all.

The claws of the demonic being already reach Cheng Qian’s neck.

Right away, an ice blade flies up from the ground and nearly runs through that demonic being. The demonic being hastily withdraws, as more ice blades appear from all directions.

The demonic being is afraid of the frosty aura granted by the ice lake. It gets stuck in the ice while trying to escape, and growls desperately. “You cold blooded bastard!”

“I’ve already avenged myself,” Cheng Qian says without changing his expression. “I won’t touch a single hair on my junior brother.”

Even if his sect insists on executing Han Yuan for his crime in the future, Cheng Qian won’t help either side. If he really hated Han Yuan, he would have already killed him on that deserted island.

The principle held in Cheng Qian’s heart is clear and unshakable. Nothing is ambiguous about it.

The frosty aura in the Vermilion Bird Tower suddenly explodes. A snowy firework bursts out around the demonic being. The ice shards that fly out quickly gather together again. Cheng Qian shouts in a low voice, “Seal it!”

The demonic being with Han Yuan’s face is frozen in an ice pillar taller than an adult.

The swarm of black snakes in the Vermilion Bird Tower disappear in a gust of smoke. All that is left is the motionless body half of the spoiled brat whose name they don’t know in a corner.

Cheng Qian quietly stares at that ice pillar. Puddle the bird, who is perching on his shoulder, looks at it too. With a heavy heart, Yan Zhengming pushes Li Yun aside and walks next to Cheng Qian. With a glance, he says, “It’s not a living being. Not Han Yuan either. This thing just assumes his appearance.”

Cheng Qian doesn’t hide the disappointment on his face.

Yan Zhengming instinctively wishes to tap his back and give him some soothing words. However, as he raises his hand mid-way, he remembers the out-of-bounds wish in his demon of the heart. Like choking on a bone, his eyes dim as he looks at a different place and says, “Let’s go. The Vermilion Bird lock has been opened. We shouldn’t tarry here.”

Then, without waiting for anyone, he leads the way and walks down the dark stairs to leave the Vermilion Bird Tower.

Before leaving, Yan Zhengming turns his head and looks at the mountain cliff on the other side of the Vermilion Bird Tower. To him, the bottomless abyss can’t compare to the peach blossom pool4 in his heart.

*******

1. From Tao Te Ching.

2. From I Ching (these two notations are from the author herself. In case you don't know it yet, the I Ching is an ancient and highly influential text on metaphysics and philosophy, where concepts of gua and yao - as in the story title - come from. It also deals a lot with divination.)

3. The Five Elements (五行): Chart of their interactions shamelessly taken from wikipedia:

4. Peach blossom: Symbol of romantic love. A person who is very popular and has many lovers is said to have 'peach blossom fate'.