chapter 7

A magical light shone brightly over the lake near Axel.

“EXPLOOOSION!”

The sound of the explosion echoed throughout the lake, accompanied with a blinding flash.

At the same time a large amount of water was blasted into the air, creating a rainbow over the lake.

“Wow…”

Sylphina let out an amazed voice as she observed the scene, while Darkness patted her head with a smile.

“How many points is that?”

“I feel that the shockwave today is a little weaker. Can I assume that you reduced its power for Sylphina’s sake, since she just recently recovered from her illness?”

For the sake of her pride, I confirmed with Megumin who has collapsed next to me.

“Precisely. A true master of explosive magic can obviously adjust its destructive power. It’s only natural to keep the audience in mind if they are present.”

“With respect to your love for explosion magic, and taking into account the needs of your audience… I give today’s explosion a full hundred points!

“Thank you, thank you, thank you!”

Megumin repeatedly thanked me while still lying on the floor. Seeing this, Darkness gave me a flat look and said,

“Say, Kazuma, were you guys always doing this kind of stupid things?”

“Darkness, how could you call this stupid? You’re saying the same things as Aqua!”

“Exactly! Even if it’s you, I won’t forgive you if you keep saying that.”

Alongside me, Megumin indignantly shot back.

“Very well, I’ll accept that challenge, Megumin! Now, bring it on whenever you want!”

“Ah, wait, Darkness! How could you take advantage of me when I can’t move! Please stop! Ah, no, they’ll see my panties, stop pulling at my skirt! I’ll start calling you Lewdness like Kazuma does… Okay, I surrender! I surrender, so please stop! Kazuma, hurry up replenish my mana with Drain Touch!”

Unable to move a muscle, Megumin quickly surrendered to Darkness.

“By the way, where did Aqua go off to?”

“It seems like she realized she could use the shockwave from Explosion for fishing. Lately she’s always been rushing around to gather the fish that float up after each Explosion.”

“Thanks to her, we are probably going to have to use this spot for Explosions for some time. What a drag.”

We started preparing lunch while watching Aqua collect fish in the lake.

Today’s lunch is sandwiches.

Darkness and Sylphina grew jealous after learning that we had a picnic at this lake without them, so I specifically prepared those.

“Everyone, look! It’s a big haul today! I might even consider bringing one back as a souvenir to that ill-mannered demonic black furball.”

“That kid has grown picky as of late. She won’t eat raw fish or bland food. The other day, she followed me into the shower and started using Aqua’s laundry as a scratching post. I wonder what’s going on with her.”

“Wait a second, what did she do with my laundry? Why is that kid only hostile to me!?”

After sharing some of my mana with her, Megumin started skewering fish for the people present, while I got a fire going using Tinder and the firewood that Darkness gathered.

Sylphina acted like a child on a camping trip, and excitedly watched the fish as they grilled.

“I personally gathered these fishes, so obviously the biggest one would go to me.”

“Hold on, Aqua, while the one who gathered them might be you, but I’m the one who killed them. The biggest one should obviously go to the most capable in this party, me.”

“Umm, I’ll give you half of my fish… I can’t eat that much anyway…”

“That won’t do, Sylphina. Children need to eat more. Otherwise you’ll end up with nutrient-deficient body like Megumin.”

“Oh, now you’ve said it! Then let’s use strength to decide who receives the biggest fish! Bring it on! Come at me whenever you want!”

Watching the two of them squabbling like children, I retreated to a small hill a short distance away, intending to take a short nap before the fish is grilled.

And Darkness took a seat next to me, a smile playing on her face as she watched the two of them squabble.

“Thank you.”

Darkness softly said without looking at me.

“After boldly proclaiming that I will protect you back then, I ended up getting saved by you again.”

Despite the topic, Darkness seemed to have a jovial tone.

“This isn’t the first time it’s happened, and it’ll probably keep happening. Ah, I’m getting really tired of cleaning up after you all. Well, I did manage to save that girl, so I guess it’s fine. Plus, I did have an adventurer-like experience for once.”

I closed my eyes and putting my arms behind my head.

“…Just confirming, but you really aren’t a lolicon, right?”

“Do you want me to punch you!? Why don’t I use your body to demonstrate that I’m not a lolicon!?”

Seeing me bolt up, Darkness started giggling.

“You don’t have the guts to go through anyway.”

This little…

“There’s a very good reason why I don’t cross that line. I… no, all the men in this city have a very reliable companion.”

Yes, if I pay those onee-sans a visit…

“Is that so? Then I’ll wait till you wish to tell me. What kind of life you really led before you came here, where did you come from… and, while you’re at it, what Chris’ true identity is.”

Darkness casually said while still looking at the others…

“Eh? Wait, you were awake back when Chris said that?”

“Of course. I’m the Crusader with the strongest defensive power and stamina in this city. How could I stay unconscious for that long? I’m going to need to properly lecture Chris one of these days.”

Still averting her gaze, Darkness let out a small chuckle.

“…Ah, it seems I like you more than I thought…”

She said in a faraway voice and let out a bitter laugh.

… D-don’t say that, you’ll make me want to cry again.

“I-I, umm, Megumin…”

“I understand.”

She cut me off before I could say anything more.

“I’m older than you all, and a noble above that. I have no intention of tearing apart my friends by throwing a childish tantrum. I don’t want that to happen. But…”

While twirling her hair between her fingers, Darkness moved her face closer to me until she loomed over me.

“You can forgive a little bit of teasing, can’t you?”

“Y-You…”

Not just once, but twice!

Darkness had a mischievous ‘my prank just succeeded’ look on her face. I need to get a little payback for her leading me on once again.

“You need to pay more attention to the time and place. Look behind you.”

“?”

Hearing my words, Darkness turned around.

Standing there was a wide-eyed and trembling Sylphina, holding a pair of grilled fishes.

“Mo-Mommy, sorry, I…”

“W-Wait a minute, Sylphina, this is—”

And standing right next to her was Megumin, holding what’s probably my grilled fish, her eyes glowing a brilliant shade of red.

“While I did say that it’s fine to express your feelings, I didn’t recall allowing you to have a secret affair with him. Pushing your child onto someone else to have a tryst, just how much of a pervert are you!?”

“Bu-but… that’s…”

Once again ending up in such a situation, Darkness tried to explain while looking like she was on the verge of tears.

“I need to let everyone know… Darkness tried to force herself on Kazuma-san, I need to let everyone know…!”

“W-Wait, that’s not it! Well, it’s not exactly untrue but— Ah, Aqua! Get back here!”

Looking at Darkness frantically chase after Aqua as she headed towards the city, I couldn’t help but think out loud.

“Well, this doesn’t feel too bad. It’s like I’m the main character of a harem show. I’ve gone through plenty of hardships so far, but it seems like my luck is still pretty good.”

“This man…!”

I hope things will remain like this forever…

Next volume preview

Illustrator’s afterart

Short story 1:The Legendary Witch

TL: Ulti

Editing: Cannongerbil, Deus Ex Machina, Keel the Swift

On this day,

“Here you go, Kazuma-san. Black tea and some cookies. These cookies happen to be Aqua-sama’s favourite.”

I came to Wiz’ shop to see if there’s anything interesting going on, and was relaxing after being served tea and snacks.

“Sorry for making you deal with Aqua every day… Oh, this black tea is delicious. You must have used some good leaves. I’m used to living the celebrity life, so I know quite a bit about stuff like this.”

“S-Sorry, but I can only afford the cheapest black tea for this shop…”

Oops, looks like I’m still a long way from becoming a celebrity.

“I see, so it’s all about the person brewing the tea. Well done, Wiz. If your shop ever runs out of business, you can always become my maid.”

“Please don’t say such things, Kazuma-san! B-but, if that ever happens, I might take you up on your offer…”

I enjoyed this peaceful moment with Wiz. Then-

“There you are, Kazuma! Big news! We have big news!”

The door to the shop swung open, shattering our peaceful moment to pieces.

Two breathless Crimson Demons barged in, their red eyes shining with excitement.

“Kazuma-san, Wiz-san, sorry for intruding. Um, we were doing research on Mages who have the potential to be our future rivals, and…”

Megumin and Yunyun said simultaneously,

“The Ice Witch is in this very city!”

“She was the leader of a party that wanted to be known as the strongest adventurer group. Even though she isn’t a Crimson Demon, she’s an extremely skilled mage who could use all kinds of magic, including Advanced Magic. She kills monsters and soldiers of the Demon King’s Army without mercy, even they begged for their lives. That’s how she got her nickname – The Ice Witch.”

Hearing Megumin say that with a serious expression, Wiz covered her face with both hands and her shoulders started shaking.

Your ears are turning red, Ice Witch-san.

“So… What happened to that witch? You don’t even know who she is, do you?”

I say that, but I only just learnt about the amazing Ice Witch very recently.

Aqua should also be aware of it from the time Wiz and Vanir were telling us the story of their past adventures, but listening to them while eating snacks proved to be too difficult for her, and she fell asleep in the middle.

“About that, we know that she put her life on the line to challenge one of the Demon King’s Generals, but after that, all traces of her vanished. Her name and personal information are being kept secret by the Adventurer’s Guild, so all we know about her is that she’s a woman.”

After hearing Yunyun’s story, Wiz collapsed onto the table.

I leaned closer to her and whispered,

“Hey, why don’t they know it’s you? They know that you were a famous adventurer, right?”

“The people in this town only know that I was a member of a high level party. And… While Megumin-san’s story is slightly exaggerated, I can’t say that it’s wrong, so I’m afraid that they might become scared of me…”

While we were whispering, Megumin excitedly interjected.

“What are you two talking about there!? The Ice Witch is in this very town, you know!? That Ice Witch!”

“Why are you two so obsessed with her? What would you even do after meeting her? Ask her for an autograph?”

“The Ice Witch has such a cool name! I couldn’t possibly ignore her! I want to challenge her to see if she’s better than a Crimson Demon!”

Megumin replied.

“I-I don’t really agree with that, but I’m curious as to what kind of person she is…”

Hearing their replies, Wiz, on the verge of tears, looked at me and shook her head.

Looks like she didn’t want others to know about that.

I wanted to ask her about why she told that story to Aqua, the famous gossip, if that’s the case, but now’s not the time.

“I’m sure the Ice Witch wanted to live a quiet and peaceful life in this town. Please leave her alone.”

“T-That’s right… And I heard that the Ice Witch is a really scary person!”

Wiz backed me up, but having to say these things about herself must have hurt her more than she expected, because tears practically spilled from her eyes.

“I-is that so? As a Crimson Demon, I wanted to settle this…”

“H-hey Megumin, Wiz-san has good common sense, so maybe we should heed her words. I’m sure that rumour about her was true…”

It almost sounded like Yunyun doesn’t think that I have good common sense, but I’ll let it slide for now.

“What rumour are you talking about? It might have been greatly exaggerated, you know?”

Once again, Wiz nodded in affirmation of my words.

“…Because all the other members of her party have paired up, the Ice Witch was left single, so she cursed this world and launched a suicide attack on the Demon King’s castle…”

“I heard that the Ice Witch was slaughtering monsters to vent her frustrations over being unable to find a boyfriend. Well, in any case…”

Both Crimson Demons turned to the crying Wiz and dealt the finishing blow.

“She must look really ugly if she was passed over within her party and had such a scary nickname. That’s how the rumour goes…”

—Later that day, news that the rumoured Ice Witch is the owner of a certain magic shop in Axel spread throughout the guild.

Short story 2: The True Aspect of Violence

TL: Uranophane

Editing: Cannongerbil, Keel the Swift, Deus Ex Machina, Ulti

“Owowowowow…! Hey, why do you only raise your claws against me!? We’ve lived under the same roof for almost a year by now. Isn’t it about time we reached some sort of understanding?”

One afternoon after lunch, Aqua had been bothering a napping Chomusuke on the sofa and earned herself a painful scratch on her fingers.

Chomusuke has always been full of mysteries, but recently she’s been gaining more and more human-like traits.

Specifically, she’s been demanding baths more adamantly and refusing to eat stuff like raw fish, leftovers or pet food.

“Ah! Stop right there! How dare you touch my biscuits! I hope you’re prepared for the consequence of stealing a goddess’ offerings!”

Case in point, she’s now stealing snacks from Aqua.

“This cat must really hate you. Even I’ve been getting along well with it. I often wake up from naps to it sleeping on my belly.”

“And why does that happen? Is it because the two of you are evil spirits, so that’s why you two get along so well? Cats symbolize laziness, right? Could it be attracted to the epitome of laziness?”

I can’t believe she has the gall to say that when she’s just as lazy as me.

As she spoke, Chomusuke, who was laying on top of the plate of biscuits, suddenly turned to stare sharply at Aqua.

“Oh, what’s this? Seems like you’re getting stared down right now. Let me translate her catspeak for you. ‘While cats do seem to symbolize laziness, their true duty is to bring happiness to people in a lazy way-nya. You have the least say out of anyone on the topic of laziness-nya. From now on, you should stop calling yourself the Goddess of Water and start calling yourself the Goddess of Sloth-nya.”

“You’re pretty brave to say that to my face! I will have to teach you and that arrogant ‘nya nya nya’ furball a lesson today!”

Seeing the Goddess of Violence charge forth, I picked up Chomusuke and backed off from her.

“In addition to sloth, why not list violence under your name too huh, you mad goddess!? Get rid of that irritable attitude right— Oh? What is it? Do you have something so say?”

Hearing my words, Chomusuke’s ears trembled slightly and she started nibbling my fingertip as if in protest.

Being half of the embodiment of sloth, it probably doesn’t like being taken away on a whim.

“Hey, Aqua, I wanna ask you something. Do you goddesses grow? Or in other words, say you lose more than half of your power, how would you go about replenishing it?”

“Isn’t it obvious? It’s obviously faith-based. The power of goddesses comes from their beloved followers. By the way, even goddesses grow too, you know? I’ve only stopped growing because my beauty and power are both maxed out.”

Where does this girl get her confidence from?

Though, I’ve heard something nice.

Gaining faith will speed up the process.

“…O goddess, hallowed be thy name…”

“Wait a minute, why are you suddenly praying to a cat? If you wanna pray, do it to me.”

As I clasped my hands and prayed to Chomusuke on the sofa in hopes of letting it regain its power sooner, Aqua tugged on my shirt.

At that moment,

“Oh, have my honest prayers been answered?”

“… … This thing… What does it find so attractive about Kazuma?”

Chomusuke tentatively patted my knee as I prostrated on the carpet, then dashed onto my thighs and balled up.

To willingly run to me, could this thing really be attracted to some kind of lazy aura like Aqua said?

Though, since it still recognizes Megumin as its owner, I have my doubts…

Then,

“I’m back.”

Megumin’s voice came from the front door.

Having done her daily explosion with Darkness, Megumin seemed completely drained as she flopped on top of the sofa.

When Megumin saw Chomusuke resting on my lap, she—

“Wuah, how could my familiar be sleeping in such a place without any consideration for its master who’s busy outside!? It’s been getting way too picky about food recently too. A willful demon like that deserves punishment!”

“Nyaaargh!”

—Swiftly grabbed Chomusuke and started playing with it.

Kicking around in retaliation, Chomusuke’s face was pulled into all sorts of funny expressions…

Ah, so that’s how it is.

This goddess embodies more aspects than just sloth, right…

“…? What is it, Kazuma? Why do you keep staring at my face like that?’

Megumin cocked her head and asked as she continued to play with Chomusuke.

“Sa-Say, Megumin, could you also let me hold Chomusuke?”

“I refuse. If you really want to touch this furball that badly, then go clean the bathroom in my stead today.”

“Ahhhh, how unreasonable!”

Lying on the sofa, Megumin showed an arrogant attitude fitting for the master of the violent, black furball.