chapter 2

The next morning.

After finishing breakfast, we bid farewell to Megumin’s parent who had to go for work, and lazed around the living room.

“Megumin, Megumin, it’s a rare chance for us to visit, so take us sightseeing around the village.”

Aqua said to Megumin who returned from Yunyun’s house early in the morning.

“Sightseeing… You do know this village is at war with the demon king army?”

I retorted, but after seeing how the Crimson Magic clan ravage the demon king army yesterday, it was understandable why Aqua said that.

“No problem. Since the village is safe, we can teleport back to Axel if you want to. Since Aqua proposed so, let’s spend the day relaxing in the village and stay another night.”

Even the subject in question said so.

“Hmm, so there are people here who could teleport us to Axel. The journey back would be much easier.”

That was great news for me.

I didn’t need to pass through the orcs’ territory again.

“Trashzuma seem really happy. I will be sightseeing together with Megumin, what about the others?”

“Alright, I don’t have anything to do anyway, so I… Hey, what did you just call me?”

I turned to Aqua, who tilted her head puzzled.

“Did I say something strange?”

“No, no… Just my imagination… right…? Never mind, what about you, Darkness?”

I toss the topic to Darkness, and she stopped cleaning her armour for a moment.

“There is somewhere I want to go. I heard the blacksmith here are really skilled, so I want to visit as an armour enthusiast. Scumzuma, go ahead with your sightseeing without me.”

“Well, okay… Hey, what did you just say?”

“So it would be Aqua, Lowlifezuma and me sightseeing. There are many scenic places in the village, I don’t think it would be boring—”

“Wait a minuteeeee!”

I started yelling. Aqua still looked confused.

“What is it, Trashzuma who wanted to make a move on the sleeping Megumin?”

“I am very sorry…!!”

I covered my face with hand and slumped weakly.

Megumin seemed to have told everything to the two of them before I got up.

However, I am a healthy boy, it would be hard not to go with the flow when I am placed in such a position.

Or rather, it would be rude not to make a move to the girl sleeping in the same bed.

After my passionate speech.

“I hope the orcs attack you again.”

Megumin looked at me as if I was trash.

Part 2

Some time later, after I treat her to all sorts of food in the only cafe in the village, Megumin gave in and finally relented, taking us sightseeing.

“What is this?”

That was my first impression.

She brought me to a building that looked like a shrine and said “this is the holy relic of this village…”

“No matter how I look at it, this is a figurine of a cat ear girl in swimwear.”

A figurine of a girl was placed deep within the shrine in deep reverence.

“A long time ago, our ancestors saved a traveler who was attacked by monsters… As thanks, the traveler gifted this holy relic to our ancestors. The traveler said this is a relic even more important than his own life. We don’t know what goddess this was, but good things might happen if we pray to it, so we placed it here in deep reverence. I heard the way to construct these buildings known as shrines was taught to our ancestors by this traveler.”

That traveler was definitely Japanese.

“Hey Kazuma, it displeases me that figurine is being treated as well as me, a goddess.”

“As the one who sent the guy with this thing here, you should be the one apologizing to the Crimson Magic clan.”

— Megumin was baffled by our reaction, and brought us to the second scenic attraction.

“This is the holy sword that is said to grant immense powers to the one who pulls it out.”

“As expected of the Home of the Crimson Magic! Such an amazing thing!”

Before me was a sword in a boulder.

Whoever draws this sword would be the chosen one and received legendary power… A cliché setting in games.

“Hey hey, can we try?”

“That is fine, but it will take some time, you need to pay a challenge fee to the old blacksmith first. You can challenge this after paying, and each person will have only one try.”

Megumin poured a cold bucket over the excited me…

Take some time?

And challenge fee?

“Isn’t this a sword only the chosen hero could draw? Ah, maybe the seal will grow weaker after some time, and it would be easier to draw…?

“The old blacksmith made this sword to attract tourist. A spell had been casted on it, only the ten thousandth person could pull it out. There have only been a hundred or so challengers. After all, this sword has only been here for four short years.”

“Hey, isn’t the history of his holy sword too recent?”

I retorted.

Aqua admired the holy sword from up close.

“Hey, I can probably break the seal with my magic, can I take this sword with me?”

“Please don’t do that. This is one of the attractions in this village, don’t pull it out!”

— Next we went to a fountain under the shade of a tree.

“This is known as the ‘Wishing Fountain’. There is a legend about this fountain. If you give offerings such as axes or coins, you can summon the goddess of gold and silver. Even now, there are people who throw axes and coins in.”

This sounded like a messed up versions of a tale from my world.

“I don’t know who spread this legend… If not for the kind blacksmith who clear the fountain periodically, this place would have become a realm of unlimited blade works.”

“… By the way, what did the blacksmith do with the coins and weapons he fished out?”

“He recycles them into new weapons and armour of course.”

I think I have an idea who started this legend.

“Well then, off to the next attraction… Hmm? Where did Aqua go?”

Now that she mentioned it, Aqua was gone.

Suddenly, a ripple appeared in the still fountain—

“… Hey, what are you doing? I can’t let my guard down with you around.”

The goddess of water (self proclaimed) pokes her head out of the water.

She dove into the water when I wasn’t paying attention.

“I heard there are people who threw their coins in, so I dove down and picked them up… Hey, when it is the tourist season, I will allow you to hire me as the goddess of this fountain.”

“Okay, I will throw an axe into the water, catch it and turn it into money for me.”

While I was looking around for something to throw, Aqua started swimming away.

“Let’s go to the next attraction, next one!”

The next place was an entrance underground that didn’t look aesthetic at all.

In a word, it was like the entrance to a nuclear shelter…

“This is the underground facility that seals the ‘weapon that might destroy the world’. No one knows when it appeared here… I heard that this facility was built at the same time as that mysterious facility over there…”

There was a giant mysterious facility in the direction Megumin was pointing at.

What was that thing for? It looked like a building made from concrete.

“What do you mean by mysterious facility? What is that building used for?”

“I mean it is literally a mysterious facility. Even after going inside to investigate, we still don’t know who built it, for what purpose or even when it was built. So we call it the mysterious facility and it has been like this all this time.”

What was with this village?

“By the way, the ‘weapon that might destroy the world’… sounds really scary. However, everyone in Crimson Magic are experts in magic, the seal won’t be undone so easily. It is a good choice to seal it away here.”

I said to myself.

“Hey, Megumin, are there any other amazing things being sealed here?

“You came too late, there were the ‘tomb of the evil god’ and ‘place where the unknown goddess was sealed’. But something happened and their seals were broken.”

“Isn’t your seals here too unreliable!? Hey, is it fine to put the ‘prohibited weapon that might just destroy the world’ in this place!?”

“No, no problem. To unseal the place, you need to solve the riddle and input the correct answer. The riddle is written in an ancient language no one understands… So there are no problems, so trust me on this!”

— Megumin said there was a place she wanted to go and brought us to a certain shop.

This should be a tailor shop.

The entrance of the shop had an old signage with a clothing logo. I could see the shop owner through the glass’ door wearing long black robes and a stern expression.

Megumin entered and the shop owner shot a glance at us…

“Welcome… Hmm? Megumin, are these two outsiders?”

He asked while studying us with sharp eyes.

Aqua was a frightened by his gaze and hid behind me.

What, what? Was something wrong?

Could it be, some of them have prejudice towards outsiders?

My heart rate increased. Megumin nodded her head.

The shop owner suddenly jumped up and flicked his cape nimbly inside the cramped shop.

“I am Chekera! Archwizard that wields advanced magics! Shop owner of the number one tailor shop in the Crimson Magic clan!”

So the people in the village couldn’t make self introduction without going through the whole motion?

After stating his name and title in all seriousness, the shop owner smiled with satisfaction.

“Once again, welcome to my shop! Ara, it’s been so long since I saw an outsider! How long has it been since I made my grand introduction!? Thanks to you, I am much more relaxed now.”

… So this is a way to relieve stress.

“I am Satou Kazuma. This is the top tailor shop of the Crimson Magic, that’s impressive.”

The shop owner smiled happily because of my praise.

“This is the only tailor shop in the Home of the Crimson Magic after all.”

“Are you messing around with me?”

I retorted on reflex.

“There aren’t many shops in the village anyway. This is the only tailor and there is only one shoe shop. All the other shops are one of a kind too.”

That Buzucoily guy also said he would inherit the number one shoe shop of the Crimson Magic.

Megumin averted her face awkwardly under my gaze of disgust.

“Putting that aside… What brings you here? You want new clothes?”

Megumin answered:

“I want to buy a spare robe to wear, do you have the same type as the one I am wearing? Yunyun gave me this robe, but it isn’t convenient if there is only one.”

She said as she showed the robe she was wearing to the shop owner.

“— This type… I have a batch that had just been dyed.”

We were brought before a row of robes hanging from a laundry pole.

The robes on it were all the same type as Megumin’s.

“I will take them all.”

“All of them? Oh, that Megumin is now a bourgeois… Seems like you are doing well as an adventurer.”

“Of course, it is about time the people in the village learn about my exploits outside. And this robe is my battle wear, it would be good to have more of it… And so, Kazuma who is going to be rich soon, lend me money.”

“Ah, you… Sigh, forget it, we will probably not visit this village ever again, I will lend you some.”

After making a tidy profit, the shop owner was all smiles as he took down all the robes from the laundry pole.

I yelped when I saw the thing that I thought was a laundry pole.

“… Hey.”

“…? What is it?”

Megumin seemed to be asking what is wrong with the laundry pole.

“You, this… Hey wait, how can use this terrible thing as a laundry pole!?”

“Ara, you know what this thing is used for, customer? This laundry pole had been passed down my family for generations. It won’t rust, so we treat it like a treasure.”

The shop owner said with a peaceful face…

Aqua looked at the laundry pole and said curiously:

“No matter how I look at it, isn’t this a rifle?”

That’s right.

It was about the size of a laundry pole, but looked dangerous like an extra long rifle. And it was actually being used as a laundry pole.

The villagers must not have known this was a weapon.

Cat ear shrine, holy relic, this rifle and the mysterious concrete building… What was wrong with this village?

Part 3

After leaving the shop, we walked around the village and rested on the grass of a small hill.

“The view here is really great. If I knew, I would have brought our lunch box and picnic here.”

“If you want to see the view, there is an observation platform at the top of the hill. The magic telescope is powerful enough to see the demon king castle. I heard the most recommended watch spot is the room of the demon king’s daughter.”

“You guys are really worthless, even the demon king’s castle has been commoditised by you.”

Aqua who was lying casually on the grass said:

“Hey Megumin, the view is nice here, but didn’t I told you I wanted to visit somewhere romantic?”

“This place is romantic. This is known as the ‘hill of the demon god’, legends say that if you confess here and become a couple, you would be bounded together by the curse of the demon god, and can never break up. This is a romantic attraction made for lovers…”

“What a depressing love story! It is not romantic at all…! What is that?”

The entire village could be clearly seen from the top of the hill.

There were black figures squirming outside the wooden fence, near Megumin’s home.

Feeling that it was suspicious, I looked with my farsight skill…

“Hey Megumin! There are demon king army people there! Isn’t that near your house!?”

Megumin’s home was in a corner of the village, further away from the homes of the others.

These people who were probably from the demon king army was gathering in the place that could be considered the outskirts quietly.

Since the alarm wasn’t raised, it means the Crimson Magic clan didn’t notice them yet.

“Let me take a look. They are really relentless. I don’t understand why they keep attacking despite us beating them up so thoroughly. If they are sneaking around, their objective is probably not to attack the people, but the something like the facility inside the village?”

Facility inside the village…?

“Isn’t there a tomb sealing an evil god? An objective that matches the demon king army would be the revival of an evil god… But isn’t the seal broken?”

“It was broken. What else would the demon king army want… Could it be the holy relic inside the cat ear shrine…!?”

“If the demon king really wants something like that, I think it would be better for him to be wiped out along with this village.”

Well then, what was their goal then?

“Maybe they are aiming for the prohibited weapon that might just destroy the world or something?”

“That is impossible. After all, that facility is sealed differently from the other places, and no one knows the way to use that weapon.”

Why was this village keeping so troublesome?

“Anyway, no one in the village discovered them yet, the village will be invaded! Let’s hurry down and tell everyone that the demon king’s army is here!”

“As expected of Kazuma, skillful in using the influence of others to intimidate people.”

So what if I am!?

Part 4

I asked all the villagers I ran into along the way to join us as we went to Megumin’s home and found…

“What is with this woman!? Where did she come from!? What is your goal!?”

“Sylvia-sama! She didn’t run for help and lack any means to attack powerfully, that is too suspicious! This might be a trap, let’s retreat!”

After breaking in through the wooden fence, the demon king’s army was facing off against Darkness who was wielding a greatsword.

“You shall not pass! You will have to defeat me if you want to go any further! However, I will definitely not be defeated by the likes of the demon king army!”

“What a troublesome woman! Her attacks are pathetic, but her defence are incredibly tough! Why can’t she just run after learning the difference in our prowess!? Sylvia-sama, let’s ignore her and complete our main objective!”

Darkness who made it back to Megumin’s home after hearing the sound of the wooden fence breaking was stalling time for us.

The demon king’s army was blocked by Darkness and couldn’t make it further.

I was moved by Darkness’ growth after seeing her performance that exceeded expectations.

“Darkness, good work in hanging in there for so long! We are here to save you!”

“Ka, Kazuma!? What, why are you here so soon…”

Darkness mumbled in regret…

I was an idiot for feeling moved just now.

“I was disappointed when I heard the orcs I had great hopes for were all female, and now, even the demon king’s army boss is a woman! Hey, if you have any pride as an underling of the demon king, show me your might! If you have the guts, make me submit to you and scream ‘Master~?’ or something!”

“Just shut up, you just mess up your chance to put up a great performance.”

Seeing the Crimson Magic clansmen I brought along, the demon king army boss turned purple from fear.

To protect her subordinates, the boss stood in front of them. This one was Sylvia right?

“Hee… Did you miss your attack on purpose to make us underestimate you, but your real purpose was to buy time? With the defences powerful enough to stop us for so long, you must be a high leveled crusader… Not hitting my minions with your attack was just an act to hide your real skills huh… Not bad…”

“… Ah ah, since, since you saw through it… It can’t be helped…”

The aristocratic lady who was being overestimated and not good at lying, glanced my way seeking help.

The powerful Crimson Magic mob was behind me though.

Since they had the wrong idea about Darkness, I will use this chance to scare them a little.

“You are Sylvia right? That crusader is my comrade, and the hero who took an explosion head on in the battle with demon king army boss Vanir. To understand her true abilities in so short a time, you are pretty good…”

“Hey Megumin, the way Kazuma is putting it seems weird.”

“Shh! It looks interesting, so let’s observe for now. Maybe he will boast about us too.”

The two of them whispered besides me.

The Crimson Magic clansmen were also watching the development with interest.

Alright, I will do just that for Megumin this time.

“… Vanir, you say? I heard he went to Axel and never came back… Could it be you all…!?”

Sylvia and her minions retreated a few steps with a shocked expression.

“That’s right, the one beside me— Megumin, dealt him the final blow.”

After hearing what I said, not just Sylvia, even the Crimson Magic clansmen was surprised.

My words made Megumin stiffen her lips, trying hard to suppress her smile.

“Not just that, the four of us even faced the dullahan Beldia, the deadly poison slime Hans, and the Mobile Fortress Destroyer which had a high bounty… and defeated them all!”

“What, what did you say!…? I heard about the defeat of Beldia, but when did Hans—!? His periodic report from Alcanretia stopped, so it might be true…!”

I see, the Home of the Crimson Magic and Alcanretia was rather far apart, so having checking in periodically made sense.

She probably found my words very convincing, Sylvia clicked her tongue with hate.

“… You are the leader of your team right, can you tell me your name?”

My, my name? I don’t want a boss of the demon king army to remember my name…

“…… Mitsurugi Kyoya. That is my name.”

“Mitsurugi…! So, I understand, I heard about the Magic sword user Mitsurugi… You have a weird sword with you too, so it is you. You are my type you know…? But for the Crimson Magic clan and a powerful character like you to be here, this is troubling. Can you let me off this one time?”

Sylvia probably mistook my katana for the magic sword and started pleading for clemency.

Mitsurugi would not have any problems even if the demon king army marked him.

And from what Sylvia said, the demon king army already knew about Mitsurugi.

“… This jerk got scared at the crucial moment again. He just had to state that fellow’s name.”

“He was arrogant because of the mob of Crimson Magic clansmen behind him, but he is backing off right now.”

The audience sure was noisy.

“That’s true, it would be my victory if we fought. It won’t feel right even if I do so, since it would be like I am borrowing the might of the Crimson Magic. I will grant you leave this one time… If, the Crimson Magic clan behind me is willing to let you go of course.”

I said with a brave smile…

“My deep thanks, Mitsurugi, farewell, we will have a proper match next time! My name is Sylvia, a boss of the demon king army…! Retreat!”

“You can’t escape! Lightning Strike!”

“Light of Saber!”

“Catch her for magic experimentation ahhhhh!”

Sylvia turned and fled with her minions while the Crimson Magic mob chased behind.

Seeing off Sylvia who was leading her underlings in flight, I said while pondering something:

“— Boss of the demon king army Sylvia huh…”

“Hey Kazuma, you are not done with your act yet?”

Part 5

“That Onee-san was amazing! She was fine even after being hit by magic and arrows!”

— That night.

We decided to spend the night at Megumin’s again. After dinner, Darkness earned rave praise for her performance earlier today.

“Haha, it’s nothing… As a crusader, this isn’t much…”

Darkness who wasn’t used to being praised sat gracefully in the living room. Komekko’s words made her feel shy.

“I heard about it too, Darkness-san. You are the one who stopped Sylvia’s infiltration right? This team is really dependable, I can leave my daughter in Kazuma-san’s care without worries now. Oh right, about the room allocation tonight, Kazuma-san…”

Madam leaned this way as she spoke. I noticed something at this moment.

“Eh, where did Hyoizaburo-san go?”

“My husband said he had plenty of work to do and decided to sleep over at his workshop… I will heat the water up then.”

Madam said nonchalantly and left the living room in a hurry.

When we were eating dinner together just now, Hyoizaburo-san was throwing a fit, saying ‘I am worried about my daughter, so I will sleep with Kazuma-san tonight’.

… Did Madam do something again?

“By the way, your taunts are great, let’s settle things with Sylvia next time!”

“That’s a great idea, I already ordered a popular model of armour from a skilled blacksmith and it will be done in a few days. Hehe, I am looking forward to the armour and the duel with Sylvia…!”

Megumin and Darkness clenched their fists excitedly.

I made it clear to the both of them:

“What nonsense are the two of you saying? We are going home tomorrow. We finished sightseeing and have no reason to stay in this village. We will rush home with haste tomorrow and spend our days lazing at home.”

“Ah!?” x2

When they heard what I said, Megumin and Darkness shouted in surprise.

Aqua who was drinking wine and eating pod peas chipped in:

“Running away after saying such a cool line? Didn’t she ask you to settle things with her next time?”

“Fighting a beautiful boss would weigh on my conscience, so let’s adopt a more conservative strategy this time. We can enjoy a bubbly NEET life after going home, so why should I wait here for that demon king army boss to find trouble with me?”

“Why you! After making such a grand scene, you are going to run away!?”

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“You are not planning to meet them ever again after intimidating them so much!? That’s going too far!”

Their reactions were intense.

“Not really, I was just thinking that we will be going home tomorrow, so I acted cool for fun. The chance of us meeting again would be very low. Or else, why would I say something like that to the boss of the demon king army? I only did so because the Crimson Magic mob got my back in the Home of the Crimson Magic.”

“This fellow is too much! What a jerk!”

“And you call yourself a human being!?”

I covered my ears and ignored their complaints.

“Everyone, the water is ready… Ara, what is the matter?”

“Nothing, let me take the bath first.”

“Hey wait, don’t run!”

“We are not done yet!”

I rushed into the bathroom with curses coming from behind me.

— After my bath, I came back relaxed and found Aqua who seemed all steamed up heading to her room.

“Hmm? Why do you look as if you just had a bath?”

“I bathed outside, they told me there is a bathhouse nearby called ‘mixed hotspring’.”

Hey, why didn’t anyone tell me. We would be heading back tomorrow, what should I do?

While I was deliberating whether to stay for another night…

“Megumin, where are you going so late at night!? I won’t allow my daughter who is in her delicate age to stay outside! You came back from somewhere early this morning too!”

“For me who am in my delicate age, my own house is the most dangerous, so I will sleep over at Yunyun’s! You are scheming to make me sleep with Kazuma, right!?”

“Ara, it would be fine if it is Kazuma-san. Trust your mother’s judgement. He definitely would not let me down…”

“You are turning against your daughter for an outsider! No, you only said that because you understood his true nature right? ‘Not let you down’ means exactly that, correct!”

I heard Megumin arguing with her mother at the entrance.

“I don’t care what you are quarreling over, I am going to sleep… After my bath, I see that even Darkness is sleeping, I should turn in too…”

Aqua stretched tiredly and walked towards her assigned room, she probably drank too much.

Looking carefully, Darkness sleeping posture looked unnatural.

Without doubt, the madam must have…

“No point talking about this further! I am sleeping over at Yunyun’s place!”

“I won’t let you escape! Ankle Snare!”

“Wha, what!? You used magic on your own daughter, are you really a mot…”

“Sleep.”

I heard something hitting the floor after Madam uttered her spell.

Finally, Madam showed me a gentle smile.

“I am sorry, Kazuma-san, my daughter fell asleep at a strange place… Could you help me carry her into her room?”

Part 6

— What should I do?

How should I handle this situation?

“Hey Megumin, stop pretending to sleep, you are awake right!?”

I said to Megumin who was in deep slumber besides me.

And of course, Megumin didn’t answer at all.

I was the type that would go easily with the flow.

Could I really go all the way for this?

I thought back to how Megumin suddenly grabbed my hand at the camp site, and held her hands as I listened to her steady breathing.

Her hands were a bit cold, so it felt really comfortable holding them.

… My mind raced.

I would just be a criminal if I carried on.

First, I need a proper reason for me to lay my hands on Megumin inside the bedding.

… And suddenly, inspiration struck.

When Megumin woke up last night, I snuggled into her bedding by saying that it was too cold outside. I just need to turn this excuse into reality.

I just needed to lower the temperature of this room until it was necessary to hide inside the blanket.

That’s right, my powers probably existed just for today.

Holding Megumin’s hand with my right, I put my left hand and hand outside of the blanket and casted a spell on the window.

“Freeze!”

A blow that used up almost all the mana within me.

This spell froze the surface of the window, encasing it with several centimeters of ice.

And the temperature in the room dropped drastically.

Oh, that was the effect I was after!

With the window frozen, Megumin couldn’t escape by the window like she did yesterday!

Perfect.

I am really a genius to have thought of such a flawless plan!

… While I was impressed with my scheme…

“… Ugh…”

Maybe I was too loud in chanting my spell, Megumin seemed to have woken up.

“Morning Megumin, did you sleep well?”

“… Morning. Hmm? Is this my room?”

Megumin held hands with me as she looked around the room in a daze. She was probably still half asleep.

Finally, she realized she was holding my hand.

“——!! You finally crossed the line you beast! Kazuma you animal! I thought the most you can do is sexual harassment, but is a coward who don’t have the guts to do it when the time comes!”

Megumin charged out of the beddings with tears in her eyes.

“Hey hold it, I didn’t do anything! It’s just handholding, don’t make such a fuss! Look, isn’t it much colder than yesterday!? I only held your hand unconsciously because it was too cold.”

Megumin realized the room was exceptionally cold after I said so. She shivered.

She then checked her body carefully and finally said with a blushed face.

“You, you really didn’t do anything!? And with the lesson from yesterday, I won’t trust you so easily.”

“Idiot, how long did you think you have been sleeping? I had been staying by your side honestly all this while.”

“Is, is that so? Sorry Kazuma, I misunderstood you again. That’s true, if Kazuma had the guts to cross the line, you would have took a gamble and made a move on Darkness… I said something rude, I apologize.”

Megumin said apologetically under the vague moonlight.

“Ah, it’s fine. However, it would be nice to thank me once in awhile right? You all keep getting caught up in troublesome matters, I have to keep cleaning up after you. Don’t you think I deserve some thanks?”

That’s why such a scene that made my heart skip a beat was my just reward.

I wanted to say more, but I couldn’t continue when I saw Megumin’s face that was lit up under the moonlight.

“… Gratitude right? You have a point.”

Megumin who always looked at me with wrath, resignation or pitiness, had a rare smile that match girls her age.

Hmm?

Her straightforward expression made me feel uneasy.

“… Thank you for taking me in when I had nowhere to go in Axel, even though I am a troublesome mage that could only use explosion spell. Thank you for carrying me home after I exhaust my mana. Thank you for letting me stay on the team despite all the troubles I caused you.”

The Megumin who was always picking a fight said something out of character for her.

Her white porcelain skin contrasted with her black hair, had a hint of red.

The signs of the Crimson Magic— her red eyes glowed with mesmerizing light.

“What is the matter? I am just thanking you right? Weren’t you the one who asked for this? Why are you acting so shy?”

Megumin said to me mischievously as I just stared at her dumbfounded.

Ah, I feel so embarrassed right now.

She always gave me attitude, but being gentle with me so suddenly caught me at a loss.

I hesitated on what to say.

“… Well, erm, I was saved by you all numerous times too. According to your customs… I am Satou Kazuma, the one who get dragged repeatedly into troublesome matters, holder of the weakest job in Axel. My goal is to earn big money and live happily ever after with all of you… Please, please take care of me from now on!”

I became more embarrassed as I went on. Megumin giggled.

“Me too, please take care of me from now on… By the way, it is really cold today. The house is run down, so maybe the cold got in from somewhere… Erm, Kazuma really won’t do anything to me right? It’s too cold, so I will go back into the blanket.”

Megumin said as she snuggled into the bedding with a red face.

Getting into the bedding under such an atmosphere would make me more nervous.

But it was really cold today.

It couldn’t be helped…

… At this moment, I noticed the ice on the window.

What excuse should I make if someone saw them?

If Megumin saw that, the Kazuma stock that rose after so much effort would definitely plummet.

What was I thinking when I did something that dumb?

I might have acted a little too desperate.

At this moment, Megumin leaned towards me.

She was much closer than before, when we were lying side by side.

“… Me-Megumin, aren’t you a bit too close…”

Megumin said as if she was teasing me.

“You are always sexually harassing me, and now you act all timid? And didn’t you say you won’t do anything right? It would be fine then.”

My nervousness was totally different from just now.

It would be fine.

That’s right, that wasn’t much.

After all, I did say something really embarrassing and she became really trusting.

If she saw the frozen window, her wrath would reach historical height.

All of a sudden, my right hand was covered by something cold.

Seemed like Megumin was holding onto my hand willingly.

“… Hey hey, don’t be so proactive, young girl. That time at the campsite too, if you do something like that out of the blue, my heart won’t be able to take it… Last night, Darkness even told your mother that letting you sleep with me was like putting a lamb into the cage of a beast that had been starving for a week.”

The room was cold but I started sweating, my voice was one pitch higher because of nervousness.

In response, Megumin laughed.

“Did Darkness said that? But she also said that even in a situation where you can do it for real, you would be too timid to act and brush it off with a joke.”

That bitch!

“Hey, what do you talk about with Darkness when you are alone with her? Tell me, I promise I won’t get angry.”

Megumin panicked a little when she heard me and averted her head.

“… Hey, you two must have been speaking ill of me.”

“It’s a secret. Be, besides that, let’s tuck in early. We are returning to Axel tomorrow right? Let’s go back to our peaceful days there.”

She was trying to brush it off.

… At this point, Megumin who was hiding in the blankets said shyly:

“… I feel like visiting the washroom.”

With that, she climbed out of the bedding.

… Hey, wait!

“Ah, but your mum locked the door today—”

— Before I finish, Megumin smiled wryly.

“She really… Never mind, I will go out from the windows tonight…”

Megumin looked at the windows and stood there stiffly.

… I covered my ears and hid my head back under the blanket and curled into a ball.

That’s right, this was the perfect chance to activate ‘hide’.

While I was doing that, Megumin stared at the window blankly.

“… Kazuma, what is going on?”

“… Jack Frost passed by just now, and left after freezing the window.”

Megumin pull my blanket off immediately!

“Kazuma! What happened just now!? This must be Kazuma’s handiwork! I knew Kazuma did this, but I don’t understand what your objective is! Why did you freeze the window!?”

So cold!

It’s really cold after she took the blanket.

I curled into a ball and evaded Megumin’s gaze.

“…If I tell you that honestly, will you promise not to be mad?”

“If you don’t tell me, I will get everyone to treat you in a crueler manner than today.”

— I confessed everything.

“… Are you an idiot? Is Kazuma someone who can react according to the situation, or an idiot? Give my gratitude just now back!”

“You are absolutely right. I think it is strange too, why did I act so dumb for two nights in a row.”

Maybe I had been traveling too much recently and my brain had burned out.

Megumin knocked on the frozen glass gently.

The freeze magic that used up all of my mana left a thick layer of ice on the window, it won’t break just by knocking it a little.

Seeing that, Megumin rushed to the door:

“Open the door! Hey open it…! Mom, mom!”

She kept yelling as she banged on the door.

However, the house was silent and no one showed any signs of waking up.

It was too cold, so I sneakily picked up the blanket and covered myself.

“… How should I put this, it’s cold so let’s sleep for now. It will be fine, I won’t do anything, trust me. If you can’t hold it in… There’s an empty bottle over there.”

“Let me ask you again, what do you want me to do with that empty bottle!? And I trusted you until just now, but I feel a sense of danger like never before! Ahhh, this is really…”

Megumin yelled at me as she held back her anger.

The warm atmosphere earlier was completely gone.

“It’s my fault, I guarantee you that I won’t do anything. I must have been possessed by an evil spirit to have frozen the window with magic. I’m really sorry.”

When she heard that—

“At least say that when you are out of the blanket…”

Megumin gave up on doing anything to me and returned into the bedding. She probably couldn’t stand the cold anymore.

“Yahoo!”

“Kazuma, you will get it from me in the morning.”

In response to my exclamation of joy, Megumin announced this to me with red glowing eyes.

A certain great man once said, “Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.”

And so, I decided to follow the teachings of my predecessors and live in the present.

Megumin who proactively held my hand earlier was sleeping in a corner with her back towards me.

This felt like a married couple who were tired of each other.

“… Hey, aren’t you cold? I am really cold, so come closer.”

“… I really want you to give back the nice atmosphere just now…”

Megumin said in resignation. I chanted as softly as I could.

“Freeze.”

“You just complained about it being cold, and you are casting freeze!? Just how much do you want to stick to me!?”

After I was scolded by Megumin,

“Sigh… There is only one pillow, so Kazuma use it. I will sleep on your arm.”

Megumin mumbled and leaned over.

“Hey hey, I will feel troubled if you lean over so obediently.”

Megumin ignored me and placed her head onto my right arm, her face touching my chest.

“Just like Darkness said, ‘even in a situation where you can do it for real, you would be too timid to act and brush it off with a joke.’”

Megumin said as she giggled inside the blanket.

… Hmm?

Could it be, Megumin wasn’t unwilling?

So it is my period of popularity…!

Just when my faint hope was gradually growing.

“Demon king army alert! Demon king army alert! A portion of the demon king army had infiltrated the village!”

… Yeah yeah yeah, I know it would be like this.

Part 7

Madam opened the door with a face of pity after hearing the alarm.

I took my sword and dashed out together with Megumin.

Once outside, we met with Sylvia who was covered in wounds.

“Ah… ahhhh! Just a bit further! A little more…! … Sigh, why must I meet you at a time like this!? As expected of you, my subordinates’ diversion attack didn’t work on you at all! Did you rush here after realizing my true objective? Mit—”

“You are noisy, shut it.”

Wearing pyjamas and bare footed, I drew my sword and approached Sylvia slowly.

When she heard me, Sylvia—

“Asking me to shut it? You might be a magic sword user, but a mere human dare—”

“Didn’t I tell you to shut it!? Are you looking for a beating!? Interrupting me when things are going so well, who do you think you are!? What time do you think it is, you think the neighbours don’t need to sleep!?”

I cut Sylvia off and roared at a boss of the demon king’s army as if I this was my first time being so mad.

“Sor, sorry…”

Faced with the explosive wrath of the human, Sylvia started to panic. But she regained her composure in no time.

“Hey, how dare you yell at me, you have got guts. Come at me together with that girl there, I will finish off both of you at one go!”

Prompted by her, I turned to my back.

Before I realized it, Megumin came to my back with a staff in her hands.

Sylvia squinted her yellow feral eyes.

Just what race was she— At first glance, she looked like a beautiful woman.

If she could move around in daytime, then she was not a vampire.

Her ears were a little sharp, was she some type of devil?

She didn’t have any weapons with her, what was that rope like thing on her waist for?

Steeling myself, driven by the fury of her messing up my night, I stood before Megumin as if to protect her from Sylvia.

When Sylvia saw this, she licked her lips and smiled lewdly.

“Ara ara, were you having a good time with that kid there? I really did something that spoiled the mood then.”

Sylvia taunted as she lowered her guard towards me and Megumin.

From the way she glanced at my katana from time to time, she was probably still mistaking me for Mitsurugi.

“Hey! Why is so noisy in the middle of the night! What is happening? Did Megumin sleep too much and cast an explosion?”

Aqua seemed to be wakened because of the commotion and poked her head out from the entrance.

“Hey Aqua, a boss of the demon king’s army is attacking! Get Hyoizaburo-san or Madam to come here!”

Aqua retreated back into the house immediately.

I really felt like slashing Sylvia who disrupted my happy times.

“I won’t hold back because you are a beauty! I am all for gender equality, a man who will not hesitate in dropkicking an evil woman!”

“Ara, I was hoping you will show me some mercy. Thank you for calling me a beauty! I have the urge of eating you up!”

I was thinking of using earth and wind magic combo to blind her, but unfortunately my mana had been used to do those stupid things, so I couldn’t even use them now.

I threw a bag I took when I charged out of the room at Sylvia.

“Hmm what is it? A gift for me?”

Sylvia didn’t dodge, catching it with one hand.

At the same time, I slashed at her, but she caught it easily with her other hand.

Hey, what the hell was with this boss!

Sylvia who caught my katana easily refused to let go.

In the end, she showed a confused face.

“… This is a magic sword? The craftsmanship is too rough… Are you really Mitsurugi? Is the magic sword Gram something like this?”

Oh no, because the quality of the weapon and my swordsmanship was too poor, I got found out immediately.

No, it’s not over yet, I will—!

“It’s Chunchunmaru.”

“… Ah?”

I was planning on intimidating her with lies, but Megumin spoke before I did.

“I said this sword is Chunchunmaru, this is a really normal named sword Chunchunmaru. Don’t compare it with Gram, some name that sounds like the bones of a horse.”

The culprit who gave my sword this weird name said passionately.

“… Fufu, hahahaha! You are not the magic sword user Mitsurugi right!? Can you tell me your real name, and why are you pretending to be Mitsurugi?”

Sylvia started laughing heartily. What’s so funny?

“… My name is Satou Kazuma. I pretended to be Mitsurugi because I don’t want you to know my real name and target me.”

“Ah hah! Hahahahaha! That’s amazing, your idea is too wonderful! I like it!”

When she heard my answer, it flipped a strange switch in Sylvia and she started laughing like a maniac.

The entrance door opened once again and Aqua poked her head out.

“Hey, I already told Madam who is waking Darkness, she will be right here!”

It happened in an instant. Sylvia pulled the katana she was grabbing towards her.

Still holding on to the katana, I lost my balance and was pulled towards Sylvia.

I let go immediately, but it was too late.

My face fell right into Sylvia’s breasts.

Sylvia threw the katana aside and held me close to her chest.

Thank you for your hospitality…

No no no, it’s a trap!

That’s right, even if she was a big breasted woman with smooth skin, tall and slender built, a beauty with all the right curves, now was not the time to feel happy about — thank you for your hospitality!

I buried my face in Sylvia’s breasts and resisted futilely…

“Stop resisting! Bind!”

This was a skill which restricts the movement of an opponent, I have seen this before.

This should be something only adventurers with rogue jobs could learn!

Is she a boss with the skills of a rogue!?

Sylvia bounded my body to her waist while I maintained the situation of having half my face buried in her breasts.

With my body close to Sylvia and a rope around us, I wondered if I would be able to live here anymore.

“This man is my hostage! That girl over there, I don’t know why you didn’t cast any spells, but this man would be dragged in if you do!”

“What…! Ka, Kazuma! Are you… Alright? You seemed to be enjoying yourself.”

Megumin looked at me with cold eyes.

I couldn’t help it, hurry and save me!

Well, don’t rush on my account, but do save me!

“Hmm? You look like a devil! I won’t let you escape, the one panting heavily in your chest right now is my important… important… Hey Kazuma! What is my relationship with you!? What should I say to look cool!?”

Aqua who wanted to cast some spells to stop Sylvia shouted.

It seemed like this girl stayed here for too long and was influenced by the Crimson Magic clan and refused to cast her spell without saying a cool Chunni line.

Just shout ‘comrade important to me’ will do, so hurry up— I wanted to shout, but with my head caught between Sylvia’s breasts, I couldn’t say anything.

… Just what was with me recently?

Since that day when Yunyun said she wanted to have my baby, until this night.

Yunyun, orcs, Megumin and Sylvia.

I will classify the orcs as a punishment game, but even so, on the whole, my luck was pretty good.

This was my popular period after all.

Or was it my only strong point— My high luck stat was working brilliantly?

I buried my face into her breasts and let her do whatever she wanted to.

“Hey boy, don’t breath hot air into me, it’s making me excited. Be a good boy and I will give you a reward later.”

My popular period was definitely here!

“But, but I can’t breathe like this…”

It was a joyous feeling for me, but I couldn’t breathe like this.

While I was squirming to change my posture,

“Sacred Exorcism!”

Sylvia lowered her guard because she was facing my way, and Aqua used this opportunity to cast her spell.

A large column of light shot up from beneath me and Sylvia.

And of course, I was caught in it too…!

“!? Ahhhhhh!!”

Sylvia screamed loudly.

I was also engulfed by the purification spell, but was unharmed.

In contrast to the unharmed me, Sylvia’s dress was all torn up after she was hit.

“You, you have done it now…! Even my leather one piece dress made from the skin of low level devils is torn…! But too bad, I am not a pure devil. It might hurt, but it is not lethal. Listen up, if you attack again, I will kill him!”

The half naked Sylvia threatened Aqua as she undid my bounds, turned me around, and pull me close. The back of head was squeezing her breasts.

She had solved my breathing problem compassionately.

“I am Sylvia! Director of the monster enhancement division, the one who will keep modifying my own body! That’s right, I am a chimera, growth chimera Sylvia! I will take this boy with me. My cute boy, become one with me again, Bind!”

… ‘I am Sylvia’ huh… Seemed like she had been poisoned during her repeated battles with the Crimson Magic clan.

While Sylvia was announcing her title, she planned to tie me up with bind once again.

Frankly speaking, I don’t have any weapons on me and had my back to the enemy. I had no means of fighting back.

And so, I didn’t resist and lifted my hands up cooperatively and allowed her to bind me with ropes.

“Ka, Kazuma! Give Kazuma bac…! … Kazuma, you didn’t resist just now, are you doing this on purpose?”

“No.”

With the back of head deep within Sylvia’s giant breasts, I denied it clearly.

Because Sylvia was tall, I couldn’t reach the ground when my head was on her breasts. After being tied up, I was hanging in the air.

What was with this soft and serene feeling?

It was like finding the home I had been searching so hard for all this while.

Megumin was looking down at me with an ice cold glare. At this point—

“Ugh…! I was too careless…!”

When I heard this familiar voice I turned to find Darkness in casual clothes without armour panting as she ran over.

She was wearing a thin black shirt and tight skirts, with a great sword in her hands.

She probably came here in a panic after Madam woke her.

Darkness whose hair was still a mess stood in front of Aqua and glared at Sylvia.

“Demon king army boss! The people in this household had gone off to get the other Crimson Magic clansmen! It is only a matter of time before reinforcement comes. Throw that hopeless man who is closing his eyes blissfully while putting his head into your breasts, and disappear! If you want a hostage no matter what… Pick me… ! I will take his place! Please let me be the hostage in place of Kazuma!”

Darkness said suddenly. Sylvia laughed cheerfully after hearing that.

“Ara, hey, you are quite the ladies man! Two lovers? But no. I like him. Hey, you are Kazuma right? How about joining the demon king army? I think you and I will get along well.”

She caressed my head gently as she said that.

“… Hey, Kazuma has gotten really close to the enemy before I knew it, she is even patting his head.”

Aqua didn’t know what else to say, and Darkness continued—

“… Hey Kazuma, why are you stuck in a place like that…? Sigh, I really can’t let my guard down. You must have been seduced by the breasts of that woman. Can’t be helped, I will save you now, so stay still…”

“Don’t bother.”

……

“Huh?” x4

My instant reply made the four other person shout out harmoniously.

I laid back as if I was lying on a high class couch, rubbing my head as much as I pleased against Sylvia’s bountiful breasts.

“I said don’t bother. You all— especially Darkness. Your attitude towards me recently had been terrible. Sylvia-san here is treating me very nicely. You all had been treating me terribly all the time, I was just thinking of switching my allegiance to the demon king army instead. Apologize, it is about time for you to apologize for making me clean up after you girls! Megumin thanked me just now too, so apologize!”

I said to Darkness.

Darkness was stunned when I said these wilful words just like Aqua.

“Hey… Hey Kazuma, don’t joke like that. You are really convincing, it don’t feel like a joke at all. Erm… It’s true, we were a bit mean to you… Erm, I went too far when I was introducing you to Megumin’s family, sorry. Oh right, didn’t you say you want a medal? I understand, your accomplishments are exemplary, when we go back to Axel I will…”

“Can you act more sincerely?! It’s too late to tempt me with money now, show me your sincerity! Look closely at the situation right now! Sylvia-san is showing me her bountiful peaks! And what about your strong point? Say it! Say it now!”

I talked over Darkness and said all that in one go.

Darkness was a bit uneasy and squirmed as she said:

“My, my defence…?”

“Wrong! Isn’t your strong point your slutty body that can seduce men!? Why are you saying stupid stuff and pretending to be a pure girl!?”

“Hey, this man is beyond saving. He is talking strangely, let’s leave him to the demon king army.”

“No, we can’t, even so, he is still useful during crucial moments.”

Megumin and Aqua whispered quietly to each other.

They must be discussing how best to rescue me.

Darkness covered her body shyly and said:

“I, I…! Never, did seduce…!”

She furrowed her brow as she blinked away tears, planning to refute my accusations.

“Yes you did! Really, your body is so slutty! Tonight! My luck stat is at the max! This is probably the most popular period of my life! Apologize now! If you don’t want me who is at the most popular period of my life to leave with Sylvia-san, then apologize! For example… Let me think…”

I let my arrogance got the best of me and uttered these words, which made Darkness speechless. At this moment, Sylvia put her hands on my head and said.

“Good good… as expected of the man I set my eyes on! I will let you join the demon king army! But don’t bully that crusader girl too much alright? You have to treat the delicate hearts of girls with care.”

Darkness glared at Sylvia when she heard that.

“You are a demon, but you could empathize with the feelings of young girls huh… It is impossible to discern the age of demons from appearance, could your empathy stem from experience of being a thousand years old woman?”

Darkness taunted with a sword raised. Sylvia answered matter of factly.

“Ara, of course I understand, be it the heart of young girls or boys.”

Hoho, as expected of a beauty of the demonic race, she understood the hearts of both men and women.

Sylvia continued as she caressed my head.

“After all, half of me is a man.”

She added nonchalantly.

“…… What?”

I couldn’t understand what she just said and turned back to face her.

Some parts of the village were probably on fire, which illuminated the sky behind her back. I noticed something at this moment.

Sylvia’s lower jaw.

Not just her jaw, there was faint tint of blue around her face…

“Hmm, didn’t I tell you?”

Sylvia answered.

The blue earring on her sharp right ear was sparkling…

“I am a chimera. These breasts you like so much are not natural, but added after the fact.”

She was speaking as if it was nothing important.

My brain was working hard to reject what I just heard.

Doing all it could to not understand that sentence.

After all, that would mean…

I had been getting excited over the breasts of a man all this while, that…

Ah…? Hmm?

“… Ka, Kazuma!? Erm… you, pull yourself together…! Hey! Snap out of it! It, it will be okay, calm… calm down…”

I heard the soft voice of Megumin and recalled a rumour I heard long ago.

Men who wore their earrings on the right ears were—

“By the way, you really are a nice man… Just caressing your head like that makes my breasts and lower body excited.”

Because of our height difference, my butt was at the height of Sylvia’s nether region.

There…

“Sylvia-san, Sylvia-san, there is something hard pressed against my butt, that is my imagination right?”

In response, Sylvia said that popular Japanese phrase shyly.

“I did that on purpose.”

— My brain froze.

Note

Trashzuma ⇒ Kuzuma (Kuzu mean trash)

Scumzuma ⇒ Kasuma (Kasu mean scum)

Lowlifezuma ⇒ Gesuma (Gesu mean Lowlife)