Since the day we went home together, I felt like the wall between me and Saito has thinned by a little bit, but that doesnāt mean weāre getting closer.
We have no relationships outside of the library, and even when weāre there, we only make small talks.
The other day, she told me to get some sleep. Her words were harsh, but I realized she is a girl who takes good care of herself and cares about others.
She nailed it down and threatened me, so I slept well and soundly just like before.
[Yes, I understand. Okay, Iāll be on my way]
Today, as I was heading to the library to return a book, I got a phone call.
It seems one of the part timers had to be absent, and they wanted me to fill in for them.
I didnāt have anything to do other than returning the book, so I agreed.
They asked me to come as soon as possible, so I tried to hurry to the library and finish my business.
[Thanks for the book]
[Youāre welcome. Anyway, why are you in a hurry?]
She mustāve seen me rushing into the library and asked in a slightly surprised voice.
[Yeah, Iāve got a few errands to doā¦ ]
I have to keep my part time job a secret, so Iāll cover it up for now.
[Oh, I see]
She doesnāt pursue my words any further, and hands me a new book as always.
I accepted it gratefully and exhaled slightly as she handed it to me.
[ā¦.. I really appreciate it that you always lend me a book every time, but Iāve never had the chance to tell you that. Sorry]
[Iām not asking you to thank me for anythingā¦]
[Is that okay? I can at least kneel down you know?]
[No thanks, please donāt do that]
I chuckled as she looked at me as if Iām an idiot.
The subtle mix of seriousness is probably because I couldnāt make her open herself more.
She made me come across such interesting books, and I felt bad to keep on doing this day to day. So I wanted to show my gratitude, even if itās a little bit.
I would like to give her something in the future.
[ā¦. Can I ask you a question?]
[What is it?]
When I asked her that, she tilted her head.
[Whatās the benefit of lending me a book?]
As of now, we have a relationship where it is normal for us to talk, but back then, we had almost never met each other.
Normally, I wouldnāt lend something to someone like that. Especially if theyāre famous for being cold to others.
I wasnāt going to think that she was quite fond of me, but I canāt help to wonder.
In response to my question, Saito looked up as if she was thinking for a moment, and without a change of expressions, she said [Itās my own satisfaction]
[You are the first book lover Iāve met whose face I knew. And I like to discuss what Iāve read. Besidesā¦]
[Besides?]
[Itās easy for me because you genuinely love books without any ill intents towards me, and itās satisfying for me to talk about books with you]
[ā¦. Is that how it works?]
[Thatās the way it is. So donāt worry about it, and think of it as a good luck that happened]
[I see]
She didnāt seem to have any intentions of asking more questions, so she opened her book and began to read with her eyes focused on it.
(Is that how it isā¦)
I donāt think Iām someone who you can lend something for free, I thought of that as I headed to my part time job.